Disclaimer: anything you recognize is Queen JKR's and any thing you don't recognize is mine, so deal with it.
So, Hi! Some of you may know me from Afraid of Greatness, and I'm well aware I need to do something other than Sirius/OC, but this was something that stuck in my head, so here it is!
And i know that laptops aren't exactly a 70's invention, but it is fanFICTION so I think we can all deal with it!
Read, Review, and Enjoy,
"Black! Would you like to explain to me why my bras all say 'once you go Black, you never go back' on them? Because I'm damn sure that I didn't buy them like that." He grins at me and I dearly want to slap the look straight off his face.
"Ah, Holmes, I knew you loved me but this is all a little ridiculous." I pull out my wand and he backs away a little warily. My words may be empty, but once the wand was out, the gloves were off, so to speak. Dorea Potter walked by and she tsked at us,
"No fighting kids." I slip my wand back into my back pocket and glare at my housemate.
"Sorry, Dorea." We both say. I've lived here at Potter Manor since I was about nine, and Sirius Black was a recent addition to the casa de Potter, this only being his second summer living here. My mom died when I was nine and my father even before that. I barely even remember his face. I do know that when he was alive he was a good friend of Charlie Potter, Dorea's husband and James' dad. He was an Auror like my foster dad and mom. Like what James wanted to be. And Lynn and Carrie as well. I suppose I should count Black too, as he like, the other three, wants to be an Auror. To bad I don't really like him.
My next piece popped into my head: 'Sirius Black: Tool, or Dick?' except I couldn't do that, mainly because I can't use the word dick in public writing and it would be obvious who had written it. I groan to myself and jab him in the chest with my wand and said,
"Seriously, Black, do it again and you'll lose your balls." I stalked off and continued to pack my things for my week-long stay with the girls at Lynn's house. I was leaving tomorrow and couldn't wait until I had almost a month of Black-free living. Just as I was finishing repairing my bras, I heard a shrill yell of
"Siri!" Who the Hell is that? Then I hear,
"Hey, Jessie, how are you, babe?" I sigh and check off number 43 out of 60 on my mental list. Jessica Allison, Hufflepuff Seventh Year, check. That left, what? 12 to go, Black? I silently asked him in my imagination. I sighed and intensely hoped that their relationship, if it could even be called that, would fall through before the start of the school year, lest I, along with the rest of the Seventh Year, be forced to endure passionate make-out sessions during and between my classes.
I make a mental note to write Lily, Carrie, and Lynn on the newest victim of the Black List and resume packing.
Muggle laptop? Check. Pants? Check. Shirts? Check. Un-Blacked bras? Check. Underwear that Black hadn't damaged (I checked)? Check. School trunk? Check.
With nothing else to do, I scribble a quick note to Lily:
43. Jessica Allison.
I knew that by the time it returned to me, all of the girls would have signed it and passed it on to someone that hadn't signed, until the last person, would send it to me. I walk over to the fireplace in my room and place it behind the grate and toss a handful of Floo Powder in with it, with the direction of,
"Evan's house, blue bedroom." The note vanished, with the trick I had discovered with the girls in Third Year. I sigh and someone knocks on my doorframe, as the door itself was open. I glance up to see James in the doorway. I wave him in and he grimaces at me and I snicker a little and say,
"Close the door, Jamie." He scowled at the nickname I gave him when I was about four, but he says nothing and closes the door behind him. He sits on my bed and I laugh at his expression.
"So, how's the new girlfriend?" he rolls his eyes and flops down dramatically,
"Oh, Nattie, it's so horrible! I didn't even know people could be that dumb! She asked what my mom's last name was! She knows this is my house and she asked my mom what her last name is!" I laugh then sigh,
"How long do you think she'll last?" James considers it,
"Hmm, seeing as she's a bottle blonde, really dumb, and kisses his ass, I'll be generous and give her a month." I whistle. Almost none of Sirius' 'relationships' made it a month. And there were a lot of them. 43 of them to be exact.
"I'll so take that bet Potter. How much?"
"You're so on. Prepare to lose your ass." We shake on the deal and I lay on the floor, with him on my bed,
"Hey, Nattie?" I prop myself up on my elbows to look at him.
"Do you think that Lily will ever like me?" I sigh and run my hands through my hair,
"I think she might. The best suggestions I can give you, I've already told you a million times."
"Can you tell me again?" I groan as I bury my head in my arms but concede.
"Stop asking her out, talk to her like a normal person, stop hexing people for the hell of it, can you at least try to listen to me this time?"
"There's something I have to tell you. I haven't told anyone because Sirius will take the piss out of me for it when he finds out."
"Yeah…are you into drugs or something, because if you are—"
"I'm Head Boy."
"Shh. I got the letter this morning. I haven't told Mom or Dad yet though." I sot next to him on my bed,
"Look, James, I don't know if Dumbledore hit his head or something, but I'd take it as a compliment, and hey, who knows? Maybe the old guy's playing matchmaker for you. Lily does love those responsible boys." Just then the fireplace lit up and there was my note sitting in it, now covered in the other girls writing as well as my own. It would make the circuit again, this time no one writing, just reading. I get up and open it.
My note was first:
43. Jessica Allison.
17 to go. P.S. I'm Head Girl, I just got the letter this morning!
What a douche. And Congrats Lils!
Oooh, snap! And go Lily!
I smile and stick it back into the fire, with the same instructions as before. I turn back to my adoptive brother and smile as I pat him on the head.
"Dumbledore's a tricky old man. Lily was made Head Girl." His eyes light up and he whoops.
"Do you know how cool this is going to be Nat? We'll have our own dorm, a Heads Tower, and we can all hang out there! You, Lily, Lynn, and Carrie, and me, Sirius, Remus, and Peter! This is going to be freaking amazing! Seventh Year, here we come!" He runs out of the room, yelling for his mom, and i chuckle and lay down on my recently empty bed.
I pull my computer out of my bag and open a word document and type the new heading:
Jessica Allison:You've Been Black Listed
She didn't know what she was in for.