Title: Mortal Coil 1/?
Rating: R/NC-17
Category: Angst, Dark Fic
Warnings: Yaoi, shounen-ai, Aya bastardization, Ken torture, non-consensual sex
Pairings: AyaxKen,KnightxKen, hints of Yohji+Ken
Author: Ellyr
Author E-mail: airyn_shinigami@yahoo.com
Archives: if you want it to can have it, just e-mail to let me know

Ken adjusted his necktie nervously as he glanced around at the people moving through the ballroom, smiling and laughing. All of them were so self-assured, confident of themselves and the power of their glamorous that had been built on crime and blood. He wished that one of the others could have come instead of him; this really wasn't his element. Too bad he'd drawn he'd drawn the short straw. There was another mission for the Crasher group tonight, but not an especially difficult or important one - hence King's decision that they couldn't waste such an ideal scouting opportunity for their rapidly approaching mission with Weiss. So here he was, attending the first of a string of parties being hosted by Kakaji that would be ending Friday. The night of the mission.

He scrubbed tiredly at his face and pushed his way through the elegantly dressed crowd to one of the small alcoves that branched off of the main ballroom, letting himself fall heavily onto one of the plush couches that had been placed there. There was no one else there to observe him. Ken leaned back and sighed in a mixture of exasperation of exhaustion - he'd always been so much better at fast, immediate action than this sort of thing.

Which made his assignment in Crasher so odd. They were required to keep themselves at peak physical condition, able to be lethal in combat if the need ever arose, but - it was so different from what he'd done in Weiss. He hadn't realized how used to the killing he'd become until now. It had become such an all consuming part of his life so easily, and here was in a non lethal unit.

Maybe Kritiker thought that he was too unstable to be placed in an assassination group after what had happened to him.

Someone flopped down next to him and Ken heard the sound of a lighter being flicked to life. A moment later he smell cigarette smoke and could sense his new companion settling into the couch and Ken turned his head, wanting to see just whom he had found himself with. He drew in a sharp breath of surprise.

He was looking into a pair of very familiar green eyes.

Yohji smiled at him, his expression a bit sad.

Ken breathed, feeling a line of pain shiver through him at the sight of his former teammate. He'd missed Yohji and Omi in the two months since he'd left Weiss. The two of them had been his family after he'd lost everything he'd ever known, their friendship and care preventing him from falling into the hatred that had been threatening to consume him. They had meant so very much to him, and being torn away from them so suddenly had hurt more than he'd ever imagined it could.

And now here he was Yohji, sitting next to him.

he said again.

The blonde took another drag off of his cigarette and shot Ken a half smile. You wanna go for a walk?

* * *

So what are you doing here? asked Yohji softly. The two of them were sitting on the wooden bridge spanning Kakaji's miniature lake, their legs hanging out over the water as they stared up at the star studded sky. They were sitting close to each other but not touching, which suited Ken just fine. He wanted to be near Yohji, wanted to feel the other man's familiar, reassuring presence, but didn't want to be touched. The feeling of another person's hands on him still made him want to scream.

Scouting. Which is also why you're here, ne? Ken turned his head so that he could see Yohji's faint profile, silently memorizing it. His best friend.

Yohji's lighter clicked and the tiny orange flame illuminated his face for a second before they were plunged back into the darkness. The blonde drew in a deep lungful of smoke and slowly exhaled before answering. Aa. I am. Ken could feel Yohji stand up and lean against the railing, his jade eyes looking moodily out across the starlit water. Ne, Ken.

He felt a shiver of apprehension run through him at his friend's tone. So serious. The one he used when broaching a delicate subject.

Yohji threw his cigarette down and stepped it out before turning to look down at Ken. Ken rose slowly to his feet so that they were face-to-face

What did Aya do to you?

Ken drew his knees up to his chest and refused to answer. He didn't want to have this conversation. He wanted to forget what had happened. Wanted to bury the knowledge deep inside himself and forget that it had ever happened. Not that that would ever happen, with Aya doing it every night in his dreams.

But Yohji could be very stubborn, and pushed on even though he could sense Ken's reluctance to talk. He knew that the younger man needed this. Needed to confront what had happened or he'd never be able to move on.

It - was Aya, wasn't it?

Ken shook his head in a fierce denial of the memories that were threatening to overwhelm him. Yohji, don't. I don't want to.

You have to, or you'll be poisoned. I've seen it before. What was it, Ken? Did he hit you? Did he beat you and never stop? Did he threaten you? Did he -

Then what, Ken? Tell me. Please.

Ken turned away from Yohji and stared blankly ahead, back at the yellow lights of the mansion. Why don't you just ask Manx? She knows. She was the one who found me when I ran away.

Because I want to hear it from you yourself. I want you to face whatever it was that happened so that you can move on.

Ken didn't say anything for a long time. Yohji kept quiet, just staring at the dark form of his friend and wondering if he would open up, talk to him... He blinked as the form suddenly stood up, but didn't face him. Ken's shoulders were rigid, his eyes staring straight ahead.

It was Aya.

Ken spun around suddenly, and Yohji saw faint trails of silver on his cheeks from where the moonlight caught the tear tracks.

He wouldn't stop, Yohji, even though I told him to. It hurt so much. I didn't want any of it, but... His voice trailed off and Ken was silent before speaking up again, his eyes looking into a memory.

He wouldn't stop.

Ken scrubbed furiously at his eyes and Yohji reached out to him again, tugging the brunette against him despite Ken's suddenly desperate attempts to free himself. He wanted to go back to the Koneko and strangle Aya. How could he have done something like that... He silently stroked Ken's back in an attempt to comfort and soothe him. So that was why he'd been reassigned. To keep him away from the redhead.

Yohji smiled bitterly. Of course Kritiker wouldn't dare to remove Aya from Weiss. Not their most valuable killer. He could probably do just about anything and get off with a lecture. Which is what had no doubt happened this time.

Ken was crying now, his face buried in Yohji's shirt as his hands clutched at his arms, his entire body shaking from the force of his sobs. He didn't care that he was supposed to be scouting, that King would be wanting a full report on everything that he'd found. He just hurt.

He hurt.

And he didn't think that it would go away.

AN: I really have no excuses for this chapter. I didn't want Ken and Yohji to talk this soon, but for some reason whenever I tried to write it they ended up having that conversation anyway... Hmmm. I think that there's going to be more focus on the Knight/Ken interaction in the next couple of chapters - they need their time in, damnit!