Hogworts Rejection Letters (Kmon13's style)
Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Harry Potter, that honor belongs to J.K. Rowling nor Bible Black…
1. Kitami Hari
Dear Professor McGonagall,
I refuse to allow my young Hari anywhere near that racist trash-heap a school that is ranked the lowest in the world by ICW standards, so I ask kindly to stop sending those owls. I also contacted you to inform you that his name is now Kitami Hari not Harry Potter so make further note of that.
Plus from what I've investigated about your headmaster the only reason he really wants him to attend is to sponge off his fame and use him as a target for his past mistake that attended your school as a student of Slytherin House who now goes by the name of Voldermort, created from your headmaster's carelessness, neglect, and misplaced conception for the 'greater good.
I feel if your if the Noble families your headmaster labeled as dark doesn't kill him first his apathy for redeeming the unreadable will.
Now you're probably wondering why I'm so hostile toward you in my letter perhaps it could be that me and my servant saved him the Dursley's or it could be that I sent someone to free his godfather from his unlawful imprisonment…. perhaps both.
You see when I found the young boy on the swing crying his eyes out only to look up at me with those eye that showed nothing but emptiness and despair like I was when I was 18 and being used as a sacrifice to Orcus during my younger days…
That right I made that deal with the Devil so what!
So I'm what you call a Dark witch or as those pure bloods call me a Mudblood but it means nothing to my master who figured made an amendment to our deal by making giving me the choice to find a virgin and let their soul go to hell in my place or to Seek out this Child of prophecy and train to weaken in the ways of magic and prepare him for the day that he could seek out Voldermort's soul pieces and destroy them making him easy to him. However I was also told that if your Headmaster continued to interfere attempting to force him to accept what he and that False Oracle who teaches divination as his destiny to add their soul to the list if my Hari is not left alone.
So until that time you do the following...
You will keep your Order or Burning Turkeys out of Japan until he reaches the age of 15 and is able to make his own choices since we both know he legally an a adults in wizards age and is no longer bound by your underage law your ministry of magic is most likely to take advantage of to silence him... Oh yes I'm quite aware of how politic is run in your magical country
Futhermore I ask that you warn your headmaster to stop sending his followers after my young charge unless they're hot like Bellatrix Lestrange or Nymphadora Tonks who are now reside in our home as Hari's personal pets.
Now before you start thinking Sirius was involved he was strictly against it at first but after watching her get house broken by my pets he came around to my thinking… I enclosed a picture album for you and your staff to look over later.
However I should also warn you if you chose to send people to infiltrate Hari's life then may I suggest Granger, Lovegood, or Weasely for the task and if you include gymnastic uniforms or Swimsuits we'd be so grateful
My Lawyers and the Japanese Ministry of Magic has asked you countless times to hand over all that belongs to Harry Potter like that invisible cloak or we'll pay the fee Gringotts requested and allow the Goblins to collect it in a fashion that suits them….
Please note if you think my reach is only in Japan think again my servants are in England too watching your headmaster's the orders movements… including yours!
In short I dare you to attempt pissing me off because if you remember the reports of Dursley's family missing their skin it lets you know what I'm capable of if your piss me off.
It give you a little Imagination of what I can do to you or your staff…
Reika Kitami nee Black School Nurse and true Witch.
After seeing said note Dumbledore had made the foolish mistake of sending Severus Snape alone to Japan to confront Reika Kitami nee Black and return home with Sirius Black and Harry Potter.
However he chosen to wait for them at their home where they fell victim to Harry Potter's new pet a Swimming instructor and Art teacher who worked at the same academy where Reika worked and was placed in a sanitarium after his wand was snapped.
When Dumbledore found him he was missing his Dark Mark along with his arm and was now a drooling vegetable.
When Voldermort had finally returned he found and took his Death Eaters to Japan the Dark Lords found themselves surrounded by the local Police departments Special Tactical Units who was already enslaved by his mother Kitami who capture him and his followers and placed him on an altar and watched as 18 year old Harry Potter impale his heart with a sword before watching the pentagram on the ground glow red as the book that was on the podium floated above him and as a demonic hand took his soul along with the souls of those bound with his mark into the book.
Then Reika heard a voice in her mind say that her soul was now free and regressed her age to the day she made the deal to save her life.
She also noticed Hari's pets Bellatrix and Snape who regressed their age to that of 18 years as well but the dark marks on their arms had vanished.
Hari then gave them the choice to say loyal servants or to leave Japan and never return...
Reika never seen a man move so fast to escape...
While Bellatrix was in a hurry to rush home and let her master ravish her new body before Nyphodora did...
It also gave her ideas to let Sirius do the same with hers hoping he wasn't too cross about leaving him with half the coven to prevent him from flooing the old man in England to give him a piece of his mind.
She knew she would need to deal with them one day but in the meantime she looked at the corpse and figured something could be done to prove a point.
A few months later...
Albus Dumbledore had received seventy small boxes addressed to the students of the school and had the house elves send them out to their respected students before looking at the three addressed to him
When he opened the first one he almost choked on his lemon drop as he seen the head of Cornelius Fudge and then started to open another to find Undersecretary Deloris Jane Umbridge ...
But it would be Voldemort's, the last Head with a note attached that said
Your Dark Lord and Ministry Problem solved...Stay away from my son and Japan!
P.S. Tell Kingsley Shacklebolt not to make the same mistakes as his predecessor and put Magical Britian's house in order.
I would start with receding those laws that are Anti-muggle born and work your way down...
Take a note from the Americans and Japanese and create Magical laws that favor of the majority or we may have to deal with another dark lord
and I would really hate that .
When he finished reading his letter he heard the screams of various students mostly from the Slytherin wing of the castle who he figured just received the same boxes as he just did..
It just wasn't going to be his day he thought as he walked down the hallways of hogwarts.
In her office Professor McGonagall was looking over Kitami's scrapbook and was wondering if she should consider taking a vacation.
A/N: Due to my latest Review I would like to state that I've rewritten the story due to his colorful and sarcastic comment that was designed to insult and piss off a writer.
I personally find this type of reviewing childish and insulting and offers nothing but destructive influence to a writers creative value and consider them nothing more than Dreamkillers and Flamers !
I feel that if you're going to critique something do it positively because sometimes your insult may result in that writer doing something against their better judgement like leave the site or flame the offending review ... ((There's a Report Abuse button near the reviewers box for a reason.))
So I with that being said I would like say I'm looking for a beta to review my works and personally would like to thank those who gave their review the right way and appreciate what you've done by viewing my story Shining Serpent and these HP Rejection oneshots.