I press the button as I get into the elevator, and wait for my stop. My master has commanded me to prepare the drop pod for the rescue mission, but of course, I can't get the Rangers for the mission prepared, or they'll know of Junior's plan.
My master is a strange one. He calls me 'Hannah' a lot. I am not Hannah. I am Ultrabeam Megagirl. He seems to think that I am a human. I am not. I am a robot. Unable to love or show mercy, I am made to fit the orders of my commander, my master. He spends a lot of time pondering things in his bedroom, and I admire his intellect. I know what you're thinking – can robots feel admiration? Of course we can. Well, Megagirls can.
The older versions of us can feel certain emotions, like triumph, a sense of victory, and determination. However, I can say with pride – yes, I can feel pride – that I am of the newest technology; my wires are programmed with the newest and best software available currently. Therefore, I can feel almost every emotion that a human can feel. Pride, determination, triumph, resentment, jealousy, and many others. However, neither mankind, nor a robot they've created, has managed to come up with a way for us to feel love. Not that there's really any reason for robots like us to feel love; love is a sign of weakness, a sign of mercy. Say, for example, a Megagirl unit was to fall in love with the enemy? Then all their powers and technology would be beneficial to the side they were originally fighting against, and the side they were made to protect would be destroyed.
I would enjoy harming humans. That would be amazing. However; I have an inhibitor chip. If I were to try and harm a human, a shock of electricity shoots through my system, momentarily freezing my software. I literally cannot move until that pang of electricity is gone, and until I am no longer in danger of harming a human, the electricity will continue shooting through my system. Oh, I've seen Megagirl units try to fight the electricity, and harm their creators, but it fills their body with so much energy that their software goes into overdrives and shuts down. Usually it shortcuts and will never be usable again, but in rare cases, I've seen them repair the Megagirl – more like recycle – into a much less sleek model, an average robot that is of the same capacity of thought as a toaster.
I set to work preparing the drop pod. The engine needs to be started and warmed up, and that quite often takes up to twenty minutes, so I can see why my master wants me to prepare it so early. I stick my finger into the socket where the keys normally go, and send a short bolt of electricity into the drop pod's engine, smiling to myself as the familiar hum of gears turning sounds from the engine.
My right ear vibrates slightly, indicating that someone is contacting me.
"Accept call," I state robotically, and I can now see Junior in the right side of my view screen. His voice comes through the speaker on my ear, sounding very excited.
"That idiot has sent up the distress single!" He exclaims, his face lighting up with a huge grin.
"I have started the engine of the drop pod," I reply, my body automatically returning to the general stance of the Megagirl unit.
His eyes are lit up with some kind of happiness, almost a childlike excitement, and I briefly wonder when I've seen him that happy before. I do not recall seeing my master this elated before in the seven months that I've known him, but I feel as though I've seen him looking this elated. Sometimes I get strange feelings about my master, as though I knew him before I was Megagirl.
But when has he ever been this happy? He usually looks quite sad and dreary, often looking at me with a look of longing. I suppose he wants a female mate, so that he and that human can breed and form a whole family of Junior Jr.'s, and perhaps my physical appearance is what he finds attractive. I'm sure my commander will find a suitable mate within the nearby future; he is anatomically correct, with highly defined cheekbones and silky brown hair, and therefore most females would find him attractive.
"Great," he says, his voice jolting me out of my thoughts. "All we have to do now is alert the others. Can you please do that, Hann- Megagirl?"
I nod, ignoring the fact that he almost called me that strange name again. "Your commands are mine to fulfil."
He sighs slightly and then cuts off the signal, and I'm alone once more. I send a signal to the ship's captain, and then page Commander Up, Lieutenant Taz, and then the grunts, Specs, Krayonder, and Tootsie Noodles. What an unusual name – Tootsie Noodles. Krayonder is also quite an interesting name. I wonder what planet they are from.
My left ear buzzes and I receive a message.
"Open message," I state robotically, and a message from Junior appears on my view screen.
"Megagirl, please come to the platform where the Rangers will get ready to board the drop pod now. I am currently on my way there to inform the other Rangers of their mission. They haven't yet met you, nor are they aware that you're joining them on this mission. Please come so that I may introduce you.
I smirk slightly, anticipated for the mission. I make my way around the drop pod, and travel back up the elevator before walking around. I stand outside the doors and send Junior a page, alerting him of my presence. I hear his loud voice, and smile softly to myself. He's so loud for a human; it's quite endearing. I relax myself, waiting for the signal to start function.
"Allow me to introduce the final member of your team… Megagirl!"
I smirk and my body immediately whirs into position automatically. "Please state a command for me to service you."
"It's… It's… a robot!"Commander Up squeals, and I roll my eyes. Really? He's versed thousands of robots like me, yet he's afraid? What a pussy.
"Megagirl, can you harm humans?"
I snap back into focus and smirk. "No…" They all sigh in relief and I smile sweetly at Lieutenant Taz."But I'd like to."
Everybody jumps and Junior shoots me an annoyed glance before pretending everything is okay, and that there's nothing to worry about. Soon he bundles us all onto the drop pod, and I glance around before noticing that Commander Up and Lieutenant Taz are not with us. I point this out to Specs and order the three of them to go see where they are. Clearly, if the Commander and Lieutenant are not in the drop pod, then some sort of emotional breakdown is probably occurring within the Commander. It'll take more than one grunt to get those two back here.
Soon they all come back, and I cock my head at the Lieutenant.
"What took you so long?" I ask as the drop pod starts to detach itself from the ship.
"Up needed a prep talk," she mutters, crossing her arms over her chest. "What of it?"
I shrug, and go into power-saving mode. My power supplies can last for five weeks without connecting to a charging point, but I prefer to save my energy supplies so that I'm always alert and at my full level of strength. I try to connect to my power supplies each night so that I'm always at full strength. The less power I have, the less energy I have to use up, and by the end of the five weeks without connecting to a charging point, I'm practically at the strength of a human. One time, my energy levels did get that low… That was horrible. I shut down and when I awoke, I had opened my eyes to Junior carefully wiping my brow to keep it clean and shiny. He had been looking at me with a tender expression, one that I have been trying hard to analyse. I haven't a clue what it is that he looks at me – perhaps it's pride? Joy? Some form of happiness to see me working and functioning?
When the drop pod lands, I jolt myself out from my power-saving mode, and my body automatically pulls into the general stance. I walk forward as we explore the planet. Ha, the puny humans need air to breathe. How funny! What would happen if I just happened to turn the oxygen levels off the drop pod? Their heads would blow up. How amusing would that be?
We start searching the hatchery for any life form. I carefully scan the area, but I have to be careful not to mistake the forms of the Starship rangers as one of the life forms that I'm searching for. I continue teasing the Rangers – part of my master's plan was to rile up the Lieutenant and get her off-focus on the mission.
Finally, Up splits us up and suggests we all split up. That idiot, Tootise Noodles, comes up to me suddenly.
"You sure are a beautiful woman," he gushes.
How sweet. "Incorrect statement." I say, not really caring about bursting his bubble.
"You don't think you're beautiful?" He asks, surprised.
Please. I'm the most perfect being ever created. "I am not a woman," I say.
"Oh, I know how you feel!"
Does he really? I'm a robot. I don't 'feel'. Feelings are the definition of human weakness.
"Sometimes I don't feel very much like a man, on account of how I never made love to a woman or nothing!"
Oh, god. I wish I would just power down.
And he's not even finished yet! "Don't get me wrong; I once had a flirtatious relationship with a stack of hay, but that was kinda weird, 'cause this stack of hay was my cousin!"
Well, that certainly explains how a horse ate his cousin, considering horses eat hay and can't digest humans…
"Hmm… All human beings are imbeciles in comparison with robot intelligence. However, you have made all human beings seem like geniuses." I smirk slightly.
"Well, I do like to make people feel good about themselves!"
What the fuck?
"That's why if you take a liking to me, I'll never stop telling you how shiny and natural your hair looks."
Whoa, buddy. "This is not hair. They are synthetic sensors which detect movement, temperature and barometric pressure."
"Well, you must take real good care of it, 'cause I never would of guessed."
I ignore him, as my synthetic sensors start to tingle. "Life signs detected!"
Specs identifies it as a mammal, and I shrug. If it is not the science officer it is inconsequential, and we may as well leave it where we found it. My sensors start to tingle again, and I turn my head to see a whole bunch of alien bugs.
"Calm down, everybody!" Up commands.
Pfft. As though I'll take orders from any other human besides my master. "Kill! Kill! Kill!"
The bugs attack and we do too. Somewhere in the fighting, Taz disappears. I follow her trail and try to find her. I don't, but I find another human.
"Are you the science officer?" I ask, readying my hand to tranquilise her.
"No, I'm the schience officer," she states, with an idiotic grin. I roll my eyes and tranquilise her. At least now I can get her back to the Starship and my master's plan will already be half-over.
"Que pasa, you piece of shit!" Taz exclaims. "What'd you do to her?!"
Oh, it seems the little Ranger has caught up. How… cute.
"I have tranquilised our target in order to minimise failure due to human error," I state, glaring pointedly at her.
"The only error we made was bringing you on this damn mission," Taz says in her Mexican drawl.
"Negative," I state, bending down to pick up the science officer. "You have made countless errors."
"Give me the girl. That's a command!"
"You do not have command over clearance. Do not interfere any further or I will be forced to tranquilise you as well," I threaten.
"I said 'give me the girl', and I said it now!" She yells, grabbing the officer by the arm.
"Cool it, skank, you do not know me," I spit.
Somehow, she tricks me, by letting go of the officer so that all the force I was using to hold her pushes me backward.
"Ah! You skank you got me this time!" I growl, angry at myself for being tricked so easily.
It takes a while, but I finally find the Rangers again. They're all boarding the ship, but now these stupid bugs have got me. I could probably kill them all with one blast of my lasers, but my program has gone into overdrive, and I'm reduced to making pitiful beeping noises. Suddenly, Up starts punching the bugs, and his rangers join him. They're saving me – how cute. I break free and march onto the drop pod before pulling Specs off – do I really need another Ranger there to talk to Junior? Psh. I have the science officer, and that was my mission. Farewell, puny humans.
Junior frowns at me. "I can't believe you lost them. Sure, they've come back safe and stuff, but you lost them."
I shrug slightly. As I sit on the table and cross my arms impatiently. "My mission was to bring the science officer back, not the others."
His brow creases attractively – wait, attractively? I mean 'worriedly'. Human females would find it attractive, not a robot like me. His brow creases worriedly and he strokes his chin thoughtfully.
"Dad was pissed," he comments at last.
I smirk. "What's he gonna do? Shut me down? They need me."
"That's not exactly untrue," Junior sighs. "Whatever. Just try not to do something like that again."
I grin. "I can't make any promises."
"That was a command, Megagirl. Whatever. I can't believe this," Junior groans, throwing his head back in exasperation. "We send her down, and she comes back without an egg. What the fuck happened?"
I shrug. "How am I to know?"
He sighs. "I'm going to go spy on those idiots. Talk to you later, Han—Megagirl. You're free to do what you want until I need you again."
A/N: So I'm sorry that this took so long. I've been working on my other fics (Michelle Walker on Figment in case you're curious) and I've had this major writer's block. I promise to try and update more often though! 3 ~MichFish