It's just a little prologue... I felt inspired again for the first time in months and felt like writing. A lot of this is story, should I choose to continue it, comes from personal experience though has been embellished to become a Fanfiction... So I hope you like it. Please review if you would be interested in reading more.
I'd change myself a million times just for you to shed a ray of light over my paled complexion, notice me, illuminate me. I try to sleep, try to block out the fears and the ever present whispers though somehow they're always there, feeding off my inner turmoil. I'm not human. I am merely an empty shell, left broken and forgotten, lying in a cloud of dust. My heart beats, though it is no longer a symphony of love and devotion but a funeral march - steady and consistent. They stare. They glare harshly into my dimming pupils and judge, each more cruelly than the next.
Sometimes I forget, make things easier. It's nice to pretend for a while. Though it always comes back with a forceful blow, like a gale force wind colliding with my heart. And then it becomes clear again… you have damaged me. I'll never be okay. My love, my passion, my talent, all is lost because of you. Because of you I wear a mask. Because of you, my talent became a lifestyle - acting was no longer a skill but a necessity. I fool them all.
I'll never know why you abandoned me, took my love, my voice, my happiness. But I've forgotten what it's like to laugh. I've forgotten what it is like to feel safe. I'm tired of being broken, but there is no one left to fix me. So I will run. Away from here, away from everyone, leaving you behind for good. You do not own me anymore, I will be free and I will seek happiness until finally it fills me with warmth. I can't be cold anymore.
You do not own me anymore, and I shall be back to collect my heart, eventually. But until then, try to forget about me; I will never be yours.