It starts at Rachel's engagement party. Or, it probably starts well before that, but it's at Rachel's engagement party that Sebastian realizes it.
Kurt wants more. They've been dating for two years and he wants more. He hasn't said anything, and Sebastian knows that he won't, because Kurt threads the area that is their relationship with outmost care. He doesn't push Sebastian, at all. He'd learned not to the hard way, when he'd entered the relationship and made Sebastian feel like Kurt expected them to kind of pick up where Kurt and Blaine left off. It'd been a rough couple of months before they figured out their grounds, Sebastian making it perfectly clear that he didn't want to be pressured into anything in this, his first real relationship.
And Kurt hasn't, since then. He's been perfectly fine with moving things at Sebastian's pace, and he hasn't once seemed unhappy, not until now.
Not that 'unhappy' is the word for it either, but Sebastian has been sneaking glances at Kurt all night, and caught him looking wistfully at Rachel and her fiancé more than once. He doesn't let anyone catch that look on his face; whenever someone approaches him or he meets Sebastian's glance across the room, his smile turns happy and genuine. But those small glimpses, they're enough for Sebastian.
He's not ready to propose, not even close, and he doesn't really think that Kurt is, either. But they've been dating for two years, and they still don't even live together.
They love each other, they passed that particular milestone revelation months ago, and Sebastian really can't see himself loving someone else nearly as much as he loves Kurt, but…he still isn't totally sure he's ready for moving in together. Kurt is, though. Sebastian knows that. Kurt has mentioned that his lease is running out, and Sebastian didn't comment on it, but he knows that it meant. He's not sure he's ready, but if he doesn't say or do anything now, he'll have to wait another year.
He's jerked out of his thoughts by a hand sliding around his waist and a soft voice in his ear.
"You ready?" Kurt asks him. "I have work tomorrow, I need to get going. You can stay if you want, but—"
"No, it's okay, I'll go with you," Sebastian says, sliding his own arm around Kurt's waist and squeezing. Kurt smiles at him, that genuine smile, and Sebastian can't keep himself from kissing him.
He keeps a hand steady on Kurt's back as they make their way across the room, smiling and saying goodbye to their friends. Kurt hugs Rachel and kisses her cheek, Sebastian smiles at her, and few things feel as good as when Kurt settles into Sebastian's embrace again.
It's a warm summer night and they walk to the subway station close together.
"You coming with me, or going home?" Sebastian asks when they're settled on the train.
"Home," Kurt sighs, leaning his head against Sebastian's shoulder. "I have some stuff I need to bring to work tomorrow."
Sebastian kisses his head and hugs him close. "After work tomorrow, then?"
"Mm, yeah. What are your plans for the weekend?"
"Mind if I join you?"
"Not at all."
The next stop is Kurt's, and he kisses Sebastian before he gets off, promising to send a text when he's home and demanding the same from Sebastian.
Sebastian spends the rest of the train ride so deeply immersed in thought that he almost misses his own stop. It's still warm when he walks to his apartment, but he wraps his arms around himself, staring down at his feet as they hit the sidewalk. If he lived with Kurt, they would be walking home together. They wouldn't have to align their schedules to be able to see each other, there wouldn't be any bitterness over cancelled dates, there wouldn't be any fits of rage over clothes left at the wrong apartment.
But still, there will be other arguments to take place of the ones they're having now. Kurt's stuff mixed with his own, compromises needing to be made that Kurt hasn't made in a while, that Sebastian has never made.
It's a big step, and it's pretty hard to take back if they do it. Sure, they both have steady, well-paid jobs, but Kurt only got his apartment by pure luck, and for him to find another, within the same distance from his office, within the same price range…it won't happen. Sebastian figures it's pretty weird that he's worrying about where Kurt will go if them living together doesn't work out, but, well. He still can't see himself stop loving Kurt anytime soon, so of course he worries. Even if the hypothetical scenario is kind of a moot point just because of that.
His mind is still reeling with the pros and cons when he gets into bed. He settles on the left side, farthest from the door. Kurt isn't coming to bed, so he could just spread out in the middle, but the few times he's tried it since they started sleeping together semi-regularly, it's just felt weird. Sebastian is alone in a king size bed, and he can't bring himself to take up more than half.
Sebastian wakes up the next morning by the sun glaring in his face. It's early; the first rays are just peeking around the edge of the window, but they're hitting his eyes just right, and he groans. He wants to lay around and doze for a while, but the thoughts from last night suddenly hit him with full force, and every chance of going back to sleep is ripped away. He stumbles out of bed and drags a hand through his hair, getting it out of his face, and makes his way out into the kitchen.
Moving in together. He'd get to wake up next to Kurt every morning, and fall asleep with him every night. He'd also get to fight with him over who takes the trash and who does the laundry, and get an earful when he inevitably messes up Kurt's clothing. He wouldn't have to cook for only himself, but he'd have to eat whatever Kurt makes, too. He grabs the yoghurt and pours it into a bowl, reaching up to grab the granola.
He stills when his knuckles brush against Kurt's cereal.
Who is he trying to kid, really? They already as much as live together. Kurt has movies here, clothes, a set of skin-care products. He has food here. Sebastian sets the granola down and leans back against the counter, resting his head against the fridge. He thinks about long weekends spent on the couch, not talking, just being, marathoning whatever series they're both into at the moment. Thinks of Kurt sitting in Sebastian's bed with his work in his lap, trying to cram for some presentation, while running his fingers through Sebastian's hair. Thinks of mornings waking up to Kurt's face, of the countless times they've fought but still made up, made it through, made it to here.
They're in this for the long haul, and Sebastian doesn't want to wait another year before he gets to live with Kurt and have as much as he possibly can of him.
Sebastian only works half days on Wednesdays, and instead of going home after works, he heads over to Kurt. His boyfriend lives in a dead ugly green building, but the interior is nothing like the exterior. Sebastian lets himself in using the entry code and takes the steps two at a time. He can't get into the apartment, but he knows Kurt'll get out of work soon enough, so he settles down on the floor next to Kurt's door and brings out his sketch pad. They have a campaign deadline next week and they're sobehind, it's not even funny.
He's deeply immersed in trying to create a grid base only using his cell phone and the edge of the pad when a pair of feet enters his line of vision.
"Been here long?" Kurt asks, smiling gently.
"I don't know," Sebastian answers honestly, piling his things together to put them in his bag and checking the time on his phone. "No."
"Why are you here?" Kurt asks then, stepping over Sebastian's legs to get to his door. "I thought I was supposed to come to you?" He sticks his keys in the lock and Sebastian stands up, brushing his pants.
"Yeah, but I was…bored," he says. In truth, he's way too nervous to be able to just walk around in his own apartment, waiting for Kurt, when he has a pretty big question to ask. Kurt raises an eyebrow, obviously not believing him, but he doesn't say anything and wrings the door open.
Sebastian follows him inside and hovers by the door while Kurt drops his keys on the narrow table and drops his bag on the floor. There's a bunch of papers on the table and Sebastian picks them up, curious, because Kurt is annoyingly anal about never putting anything but his keys on that table.
"What's this?" Sebastian asks as he skims the papers.
"Oh, that's…the renewal of my lease. I forgot it this morning, so we'll have to swing by a mailbox on our way to your place."
If Sebastian had any lingering doubt about what he's about to ask Kurt, it goes away in a flash when he stares down at the papers that means they won't live together for another year.
"What if we don't?" he says, swallowing and then looking up at Kurt.
"What?" Kurt asks, turning around to look at him. He probably aims for confused, but he only sounds hopeful. "I need to mail it, my lease is running out."
"Yeah, what if…" Sebastian digs into his pocket and pulls out a single key. He'd thought of tying a bow to it, but he couldn't find any ribbon, and then it just felt like a silly thought. "What if you moved in with me, instead?" He holds out the key for Kurt.
Kurt stares at it, but doesn't reach for it. "Are you serious?"
Sebastian nods. "Yes."
He barely has time to blink before Kurt's arms are around his neck and his lips are pressed against Kurt's and his hands find their way to Kurt's waist by autopilot, and Sebastian is pretty sure he can take this as a yes. And to be honest, the fact that he'll be able to do this all the time, that beats out everything else.