[Sorry it's only short, once writing it it was right to leave it there, cramming anymore in would ruin the impact of the end bit.]

Chapter 12

After all the antics before I'm now a little hysterical. I'm hurt easily and there is nothing to do about it today. I'm delicate. But knowing my luck someone's going to get to me with the teeny tiniest thing, and once again I will hide it and make a joke from it. But honestly, it hurts. It's like a kick in the gut. No one else will know that inside I'm bleeding and it's wounded me, I'll just get on with it and deal with it when I'm alone. When I can let out emotion and no one has to know. Other than Joanne. She notices everything; she notices when I'm down. No one else does. She knows when I'm angry or ill or upset. No one else does. Even Mark didn't know, Collins, Mimi and Rodger didn't know. But Angel noticed, he would ask and I would say 'I'm fine'. He knew I was lying but he didn't ask more. He didn't have a reason too. Joanne doesn't have to ask; something about her just makes me unable to hide from her. That's why I wrote the letter, but I also can't take help. I know that's ridiculous as everyone needs help but I don't. I have an inability to take help. I'm too proud. Or I pretend to be.

I hear Joanne come out from our room and into the living room. I'm in the kitchen but I know she can see me.

"Hey baby, how are you feeling?" She walks up behind me and starts to rub my back and arm as if I were ill or crying.

"I'm fine pookie. How are you?" I turn around to face her. There is hardly any space between us.

"I'm good." Her reply was very quiet as I reached for her back and pulled her close to me so the little space between us is gone. I feel her beautiful figure against mine. She blushes slightly as I run my finger along her jaw line so her face is facing mine directly. I lean in to kiss her. She leans in too. Her lips seal to mine and I know that this is perfect. She opens her mouth slightly and I can't help but slip into it. But it's all very slow. Everything is slow. She kisses me back. She is perfect.

Once we pull away, after a long time, she rests her head on my shoulder. She nuzzles into my neck a little and I wrap my arms more definitely around her. She clings onto me desperately and just whispers into my neck.

"Maur, darling, I love you. I don't mind if you get upset. It's ok to be upset. Let me help you honey-bear." I don't know how to reply. I just squeeze her body to let her know I am listening. Tears begin to stream gently down my face silently.

"I love you too Joanne."