Jason had been perched up on a fire escape chain smoking when he saw it. The group of goons wearing ski masks dragging a guy in a suit into a black van.

He didn't need to follow them, not really, the suit was obviously filthy rich, he could smell it all the way up there on the fire escape and the bats and cops would probably handle it. But Red Robin breezed by right over his head, and for a stalker, he talked pretty fucking loud.

"Yes! He was there, yes! The place's just been raided and I can't find or contact Nightwing. What about the tracker? Ok. Ok, I can do that."

Jason watched him go, mystified at how stupid he looked in that costume. Seriously, Tim was smart enough to ditch the hot pants only to stuff his head in a condom. It didn't make any sense. Then what was said clicked and Jason had to smile.

The suit was Grayson.

And now he had to follow.

There were few instances funnier to watch than Boy Hostage with Grayson, not as Nightwing or as Robin, but as Richard 'Dick' Grayson. This was going to be awesome.

The goons took Grayson to an abandoned factory, so Jason broke one of the top windows and jumped on the catwalk above all of them.

Dick had a bag over his head and his hands were tied behind his back, and though one of the bulkier goons kept pushing him hard, he never lost his footing. It was immensely annoying to watch, 'cause come on, push the guy right for fuck sake, and the goon seemed to agree since he began to throw his weight in the motion.

Jason leaned over the railing to get a better view just in time to see the goon shove Dick into a pipe, the sound of Dick's head bouncing off of it echoed through the walls.

"Stop that!" one of the shorted guys barked "We need him in one piece, moron!"

"He doesn't fall! He doesn't even trip, what the fuck is this guy?"

Smooth, Dick. Very smooth.

He kept expecting Dick to start blabbering away and piss the big guy even more, but nothing. Dead silence. He seemed fine otherwise, so Jason guessed Dick ran his mouth on the way here and they gagged him.

Which was funny on itself, but really… He came for the show, and the silence was boring.

Bulky guy was still trying to figure out why Dick defied gravity, he picked Grayson by the collar, making him stand on the tip of his toes.

"Cut it out, goddamn it!" Shorty barked again, sounded tired.

"You don't look like much" Bulky told Dick, their noses almost touching.

Jason perked up at that, if Dick wasn't really gagged, this is the perfect time for him to quip some horrible – horrible – pun.

But he didn't do that. Instead, he head-butted Bulky.

The goons assembled around Dick and Bulky, who was clutching his nose.

"What the fuck happened?" Shorty bellowed, unable to believe the clusterfuck his kidnapping was turning into.

"There is something wrong with this guy!" Bulky accused with his nasally voice "No rich boy can do that!"

"You're an idiot!" Shorty took a deep breath "You two" he pointed "Go keep watch, we don't need those damn masks finding us. And you" he turned to Bulky "tie him up on the back room and stop fucking with him! Jesus!" he ran a hand over his face "I'm calling Wayne."

"For the ransom?" Bulky asked sounding hopeful and even more nasally.

"No, I just need to know who his tailor is." Shorty bitch slapped Bulky "Yeah! The ransom! Now get the hell out of my sight."

Okay, not quite what Jason hoped to see, but still pretty damn amusing. He didn't get what was going on with Dick, maybe they pissed him off, dissed Superman or something, whatever it was, Jason could appreciate.

He watched Bulky leaving the back room, and was pretty sure he didn't imagine the guy's limp. Dick was on a roll!

When both goons were at a good enough distance, trying to decide what to tell on their most likely hilarious ransom call, Jason jumped down and slipped silently into the back room.

Dick had one arm cuffed to one of those exposed pipes and the other to a drawer handle of a file cabinet. Jason approaches as silently as possible, but he can tell Dick already knows someone's there when his muscles tense slightly.

He gets within a comfortable distance – where he cannot get head-butted that is – and aims to flick Dick's nose. His finger almost gets bit off.

So yeah, not gagged.

"What the fuck, Grayson?!" he whispered harshly "You're biting people now?"

There was a short moment of awkward silence and then:

"Red Hood?"

Wrong voice. Oh, so, so wrong.

Jason pulled the bag that covered the captives head and found himself staring at a the most surprised looking Damian he had ever seen – which wasn't saying much, actually, but he had like… slightly arched brows and even parted his lips a little, so…

"What are you doing here?" they asked simultaneously and glared.

"I thought you were Grayson!"

Damian snorted "Impressive detective work."

"Shut up!" he felt his cheeks flushing. It was pretty crappy detective work; Damian didn't even look like Dick at all, kid was leaner, more sinewy, not to mention the darker skin. Well, Jason could – and would – always blame the suit and the bag over his head "How the hell did you get captured by the stooges out there?"

"I wasn't captured" Damian spat, highly insulted "It was a robbery, I offered myself as a hostage so they wouldn't injure any of the patrons."

"You suck as a hostage."

"Is that meant to offend me?"

Jason didn't even know anymore. "Uhm… I'm gonna get you out of those cuffs."

"Tt. Your help is not required."

"Says the cuffed child." Jason scoffed and moved to free the arm trapped to the handle.

Damian's hand, which had no a cuff whatsoever, gripped Jason's wrist in a viselike grip and twisted it painfully "I can handle myself."

"Can you?" Jason snarked, his free hand grabbing Damian's exposed neck "Really?"

The adrenaline of the moment made Jason hyper aware of everything; he could feel Damian's throat working, and how the bones of his wrist were creaking like and old rusted door.

"Fear not, young prince!" a voice announced and suddenly Nightwing was making an entrance "Your recue is here! What are you- ARGH! MY EYES!" Dick grimaced comically and backed away from the room, shielding his face with his hands "I'M BLIND! YOUR YOUNGER-BROTHER-SEX MELTED MY EYES!"

Jason blinked and turned to Damian who had the same baffled expression, then, and only then, he realized how close they were, how intimate it must've looked.

"Is it consensual?" Dick asked from outside "Because if you're molesting Damian, Hood-"

"SHUT UP!" Jason yelled horrified and jumped back, trying to get some distance between him and Damian.

"Why? Am I killing the mood?"

"Don't mind him, Hood" Damian said surprisingly calm and rubbing the wrist he'd just freed "To Nightwing even breathing is foreplay."

"What can I say? Oxygen is sexy."

Jason groaned in disgust "I think my ears are bleeding."

"You shouldn't act like such a prude, Hoodie" Dick quipped passing by the door dragging an unconscious goon "We all remember that dildo you called a helmet."

"Yes, Hood" Damian agreed condescendingly and swatted Jason's ass as he passed by "Chill."

Dick laughed "That's my boy!"

A/N.: Another drabble that got out of hand, I posted it on Tumblr and people seemed to enjoy it, so there you go!

I swear one day I'll try to write something other than Jason and Damian bonding or whatever you call this, but so far I'm having too much fun