The Pizza Hut Marketing Blitzkrieg

By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus

Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: You all probably read the most recent chapter of Life At Pizza Hut, yeah? Well, I assume so. Anyway, both this and that particular chapter was based off a particular Spongebob episode, and I figured, the story could use something like that. However, I like this idea far too much to have it wasted on a meager chapter, so I took it upon myself to have it be its own. So as you can see, this is basically the same as that chapter, but heavily expanded far beyond the intro. And though it will take cues from the Spongebob episode it was based off of, I can assure you, this will turn into its completely own beast sooner than you think. So read and enjoy, ladies and gentlemen!


It was a fine, beautiful Friday morning in Station Square, and things seem to be quite fine. Silver The Hedgehog left his apartment he shared with Blaze The Cat as he headed out, bumping into Toadette, who took a warp portal from the far off Mushroom Gorge, the two of them heading southwards together, towards the Station Square Pizza Hut.

"So, you had a good night?" Silver asked as he folded his arms together.

Toadette giggled as she nodded her head, holding her hands together. "Yeah! Me and Birdo went racing all over the Coconut Mall... it was so much fun!" She squealed with joy as she twirled around. "Did you have a good night?"

Silver chuckled as he rubbed the back of his head with his right hand. "Well, I had a poker match with Blaze, Shadow, and Knuckles. Let's just say..." He winked as he pulled out a few green dollar bills. "It's no use trying to toy with me in regards to money."

Silver and Toadette both laughed as they continued walking down, talking to each other to help pass the time.

Meanwhile, several minutes going into the afternoon, Vector The Crocodile was on the rooftop of the Pizza Hut, going back and forth between his positions, heading east and down into his office to place away pictures, and heading west back up to the rooftop to take more pictures. He was looking at the streets with his personal black binoculars.

"Hmm... oh yeah..." Vector mumbled to himself as he looked for the next person constantly. "Gotcha! Whoa! You're a big one! Can't believe I've never seen you in the Pizza Hut before...!" He nodded his head. "Yeah, I'm surprised... I would have thought I would have seen you guys inside by now..."

Silver The Hedgehog was still heading towards the Pizza Hut alongside Toadette, the two of them ready for work after their nice long chat. "You know, something?" Silver asked Toadette reluctantly, moving his hands about.

Toadette was skipping along, her arms wrapped around the back of her giant pink mushroom cap. "Yeah, Silver? What's up?" She replied innocently.

"I just have this pretty strange feeling something odd is going to happen today." Silver confirmed bluntly as he rubbed his right arm. "I just have that feeling in my gut."

Toadette giggled as she closed her eyes. "Oh, it's probably your tummy talking! Weird stuff always happens at our Pizza Hut!" She exclaimed joyfully.

Silver shrugged as he sighed. "Well, I'm not sure. I just have a hunch something odd is going to happen." He walked into the Pizza Hut, spotting Espio, Sonic, and Charmy inside. He rubbing the back of his head with his right hand as he blinked, asking Espio curiously, "Sonic, Charmy, what's up?"

Sonic rubbed his right arm. "Oh, just wondering where Vector is."

Charmy nodded as he moved his hands about. "Yeah. The door was open, but there was no one in!"

Silver placed his hands on his hips. "That's... interesting." He then turned to Espio, asking him, "Hey Espio, have you seen Vector?"

Espio rolled his eyes as he was reading a newspaper on one of the green tables, shaking his head as he was more focused on reading. "Don't know, don't care."

Toadette held her hands together as she entered the Pizza Hut alongside Silver. "Gosh, I hope Mr. Vector is all right." She piped.

Sonic chuckled as he patted Toadette on the head, wagging his left index finger. "Don't worry, Toadette. Vector's probably paying off the bills. He'll be here."

"Hey Vex, where are ya?" Charmy called out as he buzzed around the first floor.

Suddenly, Vector crashed through the rooftop, landing on top of Espio as he placed his hands on his scaly green hips. "Sorry to keep you waiting!" He laughed as he wagged his right index finger, "I've been conducting a little research that is quite interesting, to say the least! Everyone, follow me to my office!" He then headed upstairs.

Silver, Toadette, and Charmy looked at each other as they shrugged, all following Vector. Espio groaned in pain as he popped back to normal, shaking his head as he followed his fellow coworkers upstairs to the second floor, entering Vector's office. The coworkers looked around, to see a large number of photographs plastered everywhere, of which were mostly crossed over with red X's.

"Oh gosh..." Toadette admitted as she blinked, looking around at all the pictures. "Gosh darn... You've been busy, Mr. Vector."

Silver nodded as he folded his arms. "Yeah, I agree. You sure do have some interesting hobbies, Vex..."

Vector shook his hands at the coworkers as he then took out a pointer. "That doesn't matter, guys. What does matter is identification." He cleared his throat. "I want you all to take a pretty damn good look at these folks right here." He pointed at the pictures that weren't marked with red X's, turning to the coworkers. "Have you ever seen any of them in the Pizza Hut? Think hard."

Silver, Sonic, Toadette, and Charmy all looked at the pictures, while Espio rolled his eyes, standing in the doorway.

"I've seen some of these guys," Toadette commented as she placed her hands behind her back, turning to Vector. "But I never seen them inside here."

"Neither have I." Charmy added on, waving his right hand as he buzzed above Toadette.

Vector folded his lanky arms together. "Well, according to my intriguing research, a full 2% of the population of Station Square has never set foot in the Pizza Hut." He held out his fingers. "That's 2% of people who have never set foot in here and enjoyed our presence, and that's 2% of money that's not in me pocket!" He sighed as he shook his head in disappointment. "It makes me so disappointed seeing that percentage..."

Sonic placed his hands on his hips. "Why would you be concerned over this, Vex?" He muttered in interest. "Isn't it just a bunch of numbers?"

Vector moved his arms about. "Because I want our humble little Pizza Hut to be considered a staple in all of Station Square! So that everyone would recognize the Station Square Pizza Hut and spread word of it!" He then folded his arms, acting patriotic. "And to be the most well known Pizza Hut in the world... is truly an amazing accomplishment."

"I think of pie when I see percents!" Charmy exclaimed as he giggled, putting his hands on his now growling stomach. "And on that note, I'm kinda hungry! I think I'll go make some pizzas myself!"

Vector rolled his eyes. "You'll have to wait, Charmy. Right now, I want you two to promote the Pizza Hut!"

"Will we get payed overtime for it?" Espio asked in an annoyed tone.

Vector stared at Espio for several seconds, then he started laughing his head off. Espio took it as a sign that Vector wouldn't comply, and he left.

"Oh, I'll totally help out," Espio sarcastically remarked as he sat back down at the green table, resuming his reading.

Silver snapped his fingers as he placed his hands on his hips. "Don't worry about it, Vex! We'll advertise the Pizza Hut with relative ease!" He then ran out, heading down the stairs and then leaving the Pizza Hut.

Toadette clapped her hands as she giggled. "Yeah! We'll get this place more known, Mr. Vector! Don't you worry!" She quickly followed Silver.

Charmy's stomach grumbled louder, prompting the little bee to wave his left hand at Vector. "I think Silver and Toadette can handle advertising! I'm gonna go eat!" He then went into the kitchen to make his own pizza.

Sonic wrapped his arms around the back of his head. "And I'll keep doing pizza delivery, as usual!" He then zipped off.

Vector smiled as he folded his arms together. "I'm so glad I have great coworkers." He closed his eyes as his smile faded away. "But Espio. I have to do something about him. Hmm."

Moltar came out of the bathroom, holding a newspaper in his hand. He looked at all the pictures, then at Vector. "Did I... miss something?"

Vector waved his right hand at Moltar. "No, no, Moltar, it's all right. I was just doing something." He then returned to the rooftop, hoping to spot the missing customers.