Sorry I haven't updated in a while, this one was a monster to write, as my muse had left me for a while. Luckily it came back! While I was sick, though…. DISCLAIMER: I'd be rolling in gold, like Smaug, if I did. I might have even stolen the rights, also like Smaug.
I never really liked hikes. It's just the unbearable heat, the ever-so-sticky sweat, the constant ache in the legs, and, in this case, the incredible need to pee. I had not used the loo in my entire time here, an incredible feat, if you consider I was there a total of two days. While all the others marched steadily, I was doing a funny little dance to the beloved treasure. Surprisingly, I was keeping up with the rest of the group. Well, sort of. I was at least two or three meters behind Bilbo, who was about a meter away from the 'in shape' group. I would have to speed up at times, and this time didn't end as well as the others. It happened to be on a hill, a very steep one at that.
So, I picked up my pace, ended up going a bit faster than usual, and tumbled straight into Bilbo. Bilbo tumbled straight into Bofur, who tumbled into Bombur, then Balin, then Bifur, then Ori, then Dori, then Dwalin, Oin, Gloin, Fili, Kili, Nori, and, finally Thorin. Why did we travel in single file lines? A string of what I assumed were Dwarvish curses were uttered by the group as we all stood up and brushes ourselves off. "OI! Watch your language, boys!" I shouted to them all. Only a few of them found the comment and situation humorous. Fili and Kili immediately burst into laughter, pointing at Dwalin who was having troubles getting up off the dirt. Bofur was also chuckling heartily at his brothers, who were covered from head to toe in dirt. Thorin was glaring hard at the four of us. I was giggling at all of the dwarves.
All he did was look disapprovingly at us all and continue on his way to the trolls' cave. The rest of the group headed on behind him, leaving Kili and I behind to catch up. Kili still had a grin splitting his face, one to match mine. But my smile was a little sheepish, seeing as I had been the one to knock everyone down. Kili started after them, surprisingly quick for someone with short legs, when I was reminded of thanking him for, you know, saving my life. Nothing too big.
I quickly caught up with him to fulfill my deed, and that is exactly what I did. "Er…hi." Not my most creative streak, but still. He raised his eyebrows at me without turning his head. "Hello." I pursed my lips. May as well say it now. "Thank you," this time he looked at me. "For what?"
"Saving my life. Twenty-one times."
He grinned at me and took a low bow. All while walking. "You are very welcome, Rosie. It is my honor. And thank you, for saving my life once." I huffed at this last comment. "Your life is your life, saving it once is as good as many." I prided myself in this retort, feeling it was quite wise. I told him this thought. He snorted and opened his mouth to retaliate, but someone shouted, "It's here! Treasure!" I decided that this was a good enough reason to stop the conversation and run to the head of the group. For once, I was glad that I was not going in there.
It smelled. It was amazing at how much it reeked in there. It was also pitch black so that I couldn't see what was in the smelly cave. So there was no reason to stick around. I quickly backed away from the opening while most of the others filed into the wretched place. Soon, all the dwarves that had stayed behind were Balin, Kili, Fili, and the Hobbit Bilbo. I saw the chance to relieve myself. I shouted to the others on where I was going, having spotted the perfect little clearing that was shielded from any wandering eyes. I made my way into the clearing and did what I needed to do. In the process of standing back up, I began to hear noises.
They seemed to come from the nearby plain, screeching noises and thudding sounds came from a distance. A howl could be heard amongst the screaming. Something told me that this wasn't a very good sign. More like a very bad one. After a few minutes of standing in place, I raced to warn the armed people. I needed protection, and to keep them prepared and safe. I burst out of the clearing, making several dwarves jump. "I hear noises! People, I'll bet you it's Orcs! Draw your weapons!" Some had already drawn said weapons, mistaking me for a monster. The others had already exited the cave. They sheathed them again. One of the older Dwarves said, "Rosie, you're hearing things. You're just paranoid. I can't hear anythin'." Of course, this was the Dwarf with hearing problems. "Come on!" I begged. "Just, be prepared, just in case I'm right!" Only Kili listened to my reasoning, and had his bow at the ready. I sent him a grateful smile. The others just shook their heads and carried about their business. I sighed resentfully and turned to find Bilbo sheathing a sword. So the Hobbit got a sword and I didn't?
I was just marching to Gandalf to declare this injustice when he called my name. "Rosie, come here for a moment," I kept on my angry scowl, still upset with the group for brushing off my warnings. This expression quickly turned to one of joy when Gandalf plopped a heavy sword in my hands. "This will be yours, Rosie. I trust you to not hurt anyone—"
"You will use this only for defense. I hope you will never have to use this weapon, but unfortunately I am inclined to give you this." He gestured to my sword. It was beautiful in a strange way. Perhaps it was the silvery glow it gave off, or the incinerate patterns that traced the blade. I had no idea what to name it, but I somehow felt the need for it to have a name to match its beauty. "Thank you," I said. A rustling then came from the left, causing my head to snap up.
Scraping sounds were heard as swords were drawn, myself heaving my heavy sword into what I thought was an intimidating position. Instead of the legion of Orcs I was expecting, a little old man with bird dung dripping down his face. He pulled into the clearing, being drawn in a sleigh by rabbits. I shook my head. I should get used to things like this. I half expected another person being drawn by lizards. No, that'd be ridiculous. He hopped of the sled, and went straight to Gandalf.
"Radagast! Radagast the Brown!" Gandalf called gleefully. Everyone lowered their weapons, and I just copied. Who was friends with this guy? He looked absolutely mad. "What on Earth are you doing here?" I coughed. "Shouldn't it be Middle-Earth?" Gandalf looked at me with a pointed shut up look, and turned back to Radagast. "I-I was looking for you, Gandalf." I cocked my head. He'd only go looking for the wizard if something was wrong. I mean, Gandalf would've told all his wizard buddies that he was going on an incredibly important quest, and not to bother him in any way. No, just me? "Something terrible has happened!" Told you.
"Yes?" Gandalf asked, looking worried.
Radagast held up a hand in a pause gesture, and opened his mouth with a quizzical look. He closed it, and then opened it again and said, "Just a moment – oh! I had I thought, and now I've lost it! It's right there, on the tip of my tongue!" Gandalf shot him a quizzical look. "Oh!" gasped Radagast. "It's not a thought at all! It's a—"
He opened his mouth wide, and Gandalf calmly pulled out a stick bug, as if it was perfectly normal. Well, I suppose it was, with this guy. After Gandalf rid of the disgusting object, Radagast continued, "-Stick insect!"
"Yes, definitely bonkers," I said a little too loudly. Kili stifled a laugh, while Fili smiled. Gandalf shot me a look that said, you and me are talking later. He then pulled Radagast away so that the rest of us couldn't hear the following conversation. We all stood around awkwardly while the two wizards conversed. At one point Radagast seemed to be hyperventilating, until Gandalf gave him his pipe.
"I wonder what his mother did to make him that way," I murmured to Fili, who snorted at the comment. He opened his mouth to say more, glancing to Kili, who still had his bow drawn, when a chilling howl echoed throughout the clearing. "Is that a wolf?" asked Bofur as another howl followed the first. Radagast turned to him. "Aye, that is no wolf," he looked into the trees behind us. "Well, what is it then?" I said to him impatiently. He opened his mouth, presumably to answer my question, when a humongous wolf jumped out of the spot in the trees.
While the others fumbled for weapons, Kili had already shot the wolf. "Wargs!" shouted Gandalf. Well, he had already shot the Warg. I bit back my I told you so, and drew my own sword. "Who did you tell?!" Gandalf yelled at Thorin who looked perplexed. "No one!" he shouted back from his place by the Warg. "Who did you tell?!" Gandalf repeated. Now Thorin looked angered. "No one! I told no one! What in Durin's name is going on?" Gandalf looked at him suspiciously before saying, "You are being hunted." Bilbo and I shared a look of pure fear, being the only ones who seemed to not have experience in this area. Dwalin growled, "We have to get out of here,"
"We can't!" cried Ori, stumbling with his book in his hands. Was that a diary? "We have no ponies! They've bolted!" Really. Really. It seemed as if everything wanted to go wrong at that moment. Radagast puffed out his chest and looked at us all. "I'll draw them off." He stated proudly. Gandalf looked at him as if he was mad. Finally, he realizes. "These are Gundabad Wargs, the will outrun you," "These are Rosgobel Rabbits," Radagast sassed back, jutting out his chin in a stubborn way. "I'd like to see them try," and with that, he jumped on his sleigh and sped off.
Gandalf muttered something to himself, before turning to us. "Come! He has bought us time, but they may still find us. We must hurry, if we wish to outrun them and find safe passage!"
And we ran.
We ran a long way, with myself huffing and puffing behind them all, panicking. I felt an awful lot like stopping, but every time a Warg howled, I put on another burst of speed. Suddenly, I rammed into Kili, who had stopped, and as I nearly fell over, he snatched up my hand and yelled into my face, "Hurry up!" and we ran, and ran, and ran, Kili pulling me along the entire way.
Finally, when I felt like fainting, we stopped behind a large boulder, catching our breath. I needed to get in shape. Badly. I was just about to say, I think we lost them, when we heard a loud thump, as something jumped onto the top of the rock. I froze. I watched as Thorin gave Kili a nod, and Kili slowly drew an arrow. He quickly stepped out of the shielding part of the rock, and shot the Warg and Orc. They fell to the ground, and the dwarves surged forward and began to beat them mercilessly. That didn't stop the Orc from making loud screeching noises as he died. I had originally thought that that wasn't helping him, until I realized that it was warning the others.
The Company of Thorin Oakenshield had come to the same conclusion, and quickly killed the noise-maker of an Orc. "Move!" someone screamed, and run we did. We scrambled about, and di so for the next few minutes before I realized that we were surrounded. "Kili, shoot them," Came Thorin's shout, sounding a bit panicked.
"Where's Gandalf?" Ah, new problem. Just what we needed. If he'd ditched us, his own mother wouldn't recognize him after I was finished. "He's abandoned us!" I nodded and was just about to give up hope, when came the old wizard's voice, "Here, you fools!" He was standing in the opening of a cave in a rock, and we all raced towards him desperately. I slid in before Thorin, landing hard on my back, and after Thorin slid in he shouted, "Kili!" My heart softened towards the guy as Kili slid down the natural slide. At least he cared for someone. As we all waited with baited breath, an Orc tumbled down the hole. I jumped, filled with adrenaline, before I realized it was dead. Thank goodness. Thorin pulled out an arrow embedded in the carcass. "Elves," he spat, while throwing down the arrow.
"There's an entrance back here!" a dwarf shouted. "Do we follow it?" Gandalf pushed past him. "Of course," and we all filed in after him. We winded and twisted, and I was starting to get a little claustrophobic as I pushed past Dwarves to reach the one I fancied. "Thanks, again, for saving my ass," I said, referring to him dragging me with him. He grinned at me. "Again, my honor,"
I smiled back, utterly attracted to him, when a blinding light poured in from the entrance. We went towards the light like moths, and by the time I got out there, Gandalf had just finished speaking. "Rivendell," Bilbo said, referring to the city down below.
I looked down to have my breath taken away from me. My race had built this. I could now find reason to be proud of it. It was like a cascade of waterfalls, and embedded in them was a glowing white city. I knew what stopping here meant.
Food, the loo, water, and bathing. My new dream come true.
I need a name for the sword! Please send in suggestions, and I guarantee a 99% chance that I will use one. Send me a PM or review with your suggestions. And please review! It's not that hard! I'll send you a virtual cookie if you do!