Finally, I remember to publish this! Go me! I own nothing. Enjoy!

"Oh, Shizu-chan, oh Shizu-chan~! Where for art thou, Shizu-chan~? Oh, Shizu-chan, oh Shizu-chan~! Where for art thou-!"

"I-ZA-YA-KUN!" a rage filled voice interrupted the raven haired man's singing.

Crimson eyes turned to face the owner of the voice. "There you are, Shizu-chan!"

Heiwajima Shizuo gave a venom filled glare, "I'm pretty sure I told you to stay out of Ikebukuro, flea!"

"You might've mentioned it once or twice…or several times." Orihara Izaya smirked at Shizuo. "But trust be told, I have no desire to play with you, Shizu-chan."

Shizuo lifted a single brown. "And why not, flea?"

"Surely your protozoan mind knows what holiday is coming up~!" Izaya pulled his trademark jacket closer around him, a fruitless attempt to block out winter's chilly air.

"Christmas, obviously," Shizuo replied gruffly.

"So you DO know," Izaya said.

Shizuo lit a cigarette, the burst of nicotine calming him temporarily. "What does Christmas have to do with anything?"

"Christmas is a time of joy, cheer, and peace, of course~" Izaya exclaimed, breath coming out in puffs visible in the cold air, "A time of NO FIGHTING, Shizu-chan! Surely a monster such as you can avoid a fight~!"

Shizuo breathed out a puff of smoke. "I have plans. Kasuka is trying to get some time to come over for the holi-!" he stopped when his cigarette was suddenly cut in half. The part not held by his lips fell to the ground.

Izaya was frowning, hands in his pockets. "I really don't like those things. I'd rather you not die of lung cancer."

"You fucking louse! I am going to fucking-!"

"Look at that, boys," a female voice said as a ton of people came out of the surrounding shadows, trapping the informant and bodyguard in a tight circle, "Orihara Izaya and Heiwajima Shizuo in one place. Talk about lucky."

"Who the hell are you?!" Shizuo growled, thoroughly pissed off.

"We're a new gang in Ikebukuro-the White coats!" the female voice said. Sure enough, all of them were wearing white lab coats. The female speaking had long golden blond hair and aquamarine blue eyes, and spoke in broken Japanese. Clearly, she wasn't from Ikebukuro-or Japan at all, really. "We use out victims as experiments! And today, you two are our experiments. Fire at will!"

All of the members took out what looked like pistols and fired at the two. Instead of bullets, they fired lime green beams that buried themselves in the two enemies' chests and backs before either could move. While consumed their vision.

I don't even know, guys.

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