Yes I'm updating again :) You can thank Carrotmusic for editing this, and prompting me to write this so quickly. R&R i always want to know what you think or feel.
Stephanie felt a lot more secure in her own skin after the talk with her men, as she liked to think of them. She felt like they were all closer, and she'd noticed that a stronger bond had developed between Hector and Ranger. For that she was glad. There had been a few more tv/movie nights where she'd sat on the couch, squished between her two men, allowing their presence to settle over her. She was feeling freer these days than she had in a long time.
She now kissed Ranger with little thought, and his touch no longer merited an internal pep talk. Her therapy was down to once a week, and mostly just a general session, though they had touched on the idea of sex a few times in recent session. The thought of actually having sex still sent her into a mini melt down but even that was progress.
'Ranger was amazing.' She thought as she absently cleaned the bench of clinic. He didn't push or hint, he just accepted her limits, reading her body language so well that he could always tell when to inch further and when to pull away. She sighed, feeling loved.
There had been a bad episode a few days ago, but Steph felt like it brought them closer. They'd been making out like teenagers, as they often did, and things had moved to a higher level. They'd been slowly upping the contact and this make out session had them mostly clothed - well, Ranger was missing his top, and she was down to her bra and jeans, but the important parts were covered. It still made her smile that she could be comfortable enough with someone, other than Hector, to be in such a vulnerable position.
Ranger's hands were all over her breasts, and she was grinding them both to completion when Ranger slowly moved a hand downwards. He looked deep in her eyes to make sure she was okay. And she was, until he pressed a single fingertip into her.
He saw it immediately - her eyes fogged up as she was pulled away from reality into her nightmares. Quickly Ranger was up and on the phone, to Hector and to Sally. He pulled his top on and held up Steph's shirt, unsure if touching her to help her put it on would make things worse or not.
Steph lay unmoving in the bed, eyes looking unseeingly into nothing. Every now and then she would flinch, just slightly, and Ranger knew that somewhere in her head something horrible was happening. Except, he reminded himself, it wasn't just in her head, these things had actually happened to her. She had endured days of torture and then months of healing. He crawled back into bed with the phone in his hand and pulled her into his side. She tensed slightly, then relaxed as she settled into his side, not really there but comforted at the same time.
Hector arrived quickly - Ranger didn't send a 911 text unless it was truly urgent. He found them cuddled together on the bed, at first glance looking peaceful, until you took in the blank hard look on Ranger's face and the vacant look on Stephanie's. He crawled in next to them, wrapping a arm around Steph, in a awkward three-way hug.
Five minutes later Steph tensed up, gasping and thrashing. The two men held her tight, whispering words of comfort and love. She settles quick, gripping both men and pulling them closer to her. Afterward, the three of them had just stayed like that, in silence, until Sally had arrived.
Ranger and Hector had left Sally and Steph alone to talk and headed to the gym. They stepped onto the sparring mat, but neither fought with any conviction. Finally Ranger stopped them. Sitting down on the mat he asked:
"What happened that night?"
Hector turned away, letting the shame that filled him that night, and most nights since out of the box he tried to keep it in.
"I failed her."
Steph and Sally were talking. Steph had a lot of feelings to deal with. She felt shame and guilt: for freaking out on Ranger, for what had happened to her, and for not being able to move on. There was anger as well: she was so angry at the men that had stolen this from her, so angry that they had reduced her to this, and angry that she still let it affect her.
Sally asked what the flash back was about. Steph recalled it for her; it was about the night they had taken her. How they had teased and taunted her, verbally abusing both her and Hector, before they started touching her. How they'd claimed that they had to open her up first, before she was ready for a real cock. They'd used their fingers and other things to stretch her, ripping the sensitive tissues as she'd cried and pleaded.
These men had been her friends at one point. That hurt her as much as what they did to her. She couldn't comprehend how a few days before these men had been hugging her, any touches were soft and friendly. Now they took pleasure in her pain
Sally asked if there she had any anger toward Hector, as one might argue that it was his lies that lead to her torture, but Stephanie shook her head, even before the question was finished. Hector had supported her, taking her in and loving her when no one else would. It wasn't his fault he was forced to hide who he was. She knew from the start; she was a willing partner in the deception. The fault lay only on the heads of the men who had hurt her, in the friends that turned on her and Hector.
They talked about what had triggered the flashback. Stephanie was confused. She hadn't felt uncomfortable, she was enjoying herself one minute and then BOOM, flashback. She had no problem with Ranger touching her. Sally advised that Stephanie stay away from actual vagina penetration until they could talk more about it. Sally was quick to say that it didn't mean that they had to stop exploring the relationship, just avoid penetration.
She also suggested getting comfortable touching Ranger more, Sally joking that for as good as it looked through his pants that it must be a sight to behold. Stephanie blushed, admitting she had yet to see it, or touch it. Sally continued to joke, but there was a serious undercurrent to the humour; Ranger looked big and Sally was worried that it might scare Stephanie. After spending more time discussing coping measures and techniques, Steph went off to shower and Sally left in search of the men.
Tank, Ranger's right hand man, was stationed outside the door, so Sally asked if he could find Ranger and Hector. Tank flipped open his phone and after a supremely short conversation, in which he hung up without saying goodbye, let Sally know that the men were in the gym. Tank then offered to escort Sally to the gym, if there was a need.
In less than 5 minutes, Sally was in the gym and involved in a hushed conversation with the two men.
"Is she okay?" was the first thing out of Ranger's mouth.
"I think she'll be okay; she just needs a little time. I'd suggest that you avoid those kinds of activities until she can process this. But she's doing amazingly well. This crisis wasn't a bad thing, so don't blame yourself. It was just another step on the road to recovery."
"How can we help her?" asked Hector.
"Just keep supporting her. She needs you both. I think you've both done remarkable well adapting to the situation, and her needs. She's been less worried about how the relationship is seen, and that's made it easier for her to focus on healing."
"If either of you need to talk, I'm always available." Sally said before turning on his impressive heels and following Tank out of the gym.
Quickly the men got cleaned up and heading back to Hector and Steph's apartment.
When they arrived they could hear the shower running. Steam was seeping out from under the door, so they knew that Steph must have had the hot water turned up. She always took the hottest showers after a memory.
Ranger sat on the couch as Hector went to grab drink. Both sat in silence and waited.
"Are you alright?" Hector asked as soon as the bathroom door opened.
"I am" she sighed "But can we all cuddle up on the couch for a while? I feel better when I'm surrounded by both of you." The admission made her blush slightly but neither man pointed that out.
They chose a movie and settled in, Steph sandwiched between her men. She had never felt quite so safe before. With both of her men next to her, nothing could touch her. She wondered if this was how normal people felt with their families. Maybe how children felt with their parents? She let her mind go blank as she grew tired.
"I love you both" She whispered as she fell asleep.