L and Soichiro Yagami where viewing the surveillance tapes that were currently recording Director Kitamura (AN: I can't get this right! Could someone please tell me his proper name and rank?) and his family. To be honest, they were both finding it quite boring. His wife and daughter were both in the living room whilst Kitamura was in his study, signing paperwork.
Kitamura left his study around nine pm and fetched a towel from a closet. He then went to the bathroom and turned on the shower. Yagami felt a growing sense of unease. Did he really have to see this? Then, right before there horrified eyes, Kitamura stripped and scarred them both for life. L took it one step further and promptly fell off of his chair, while pressing his palms to his eyes. Watari, quick as ever, pixelated the man's private parts, but not before Yagami had a huge view of the man's jiggling arse.
"Is it over?" L whispered, still covering his eyes and lying awkwardly on the floor.
Yagami gulped. "Well, he's pixelated, at least."
"Oh, thank God." L muttered, retrieving his chair and returning to his crouch. "That is not a pleasant sight." Seeing an old, balding, large man naked in the shower was not what L would called a pleasant sight.
"The only people I want to see naked are Light and Matsuda." L muttered.
"What was that?" Yagami asked, distracted.
"Nothing!" Five minutes passed. This guy was having a very long shower.
"I think it's safe to assume that he won't be doing anything else." Yagami said slowly.
"You're right." L agreed. Maybe they could switch with another team now? His wondering was interupted as the door opened for Matsuda. 'This isn't going to be good.' L thought.
"Hey, can I-" He stopped dead in his tracks. "W-wha-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THAT IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING I'VE EVER SEEN! AHHHHHHHHH RYUZAKI WHY ARE YOU WATCHING THIS!? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH TURN IT OFF GOD WHY ARE YOU STILL WATCHING THIS!?" Matsuda finally paused to suck in another breath and Yagami took the opportunity to interupt him.
"Matsuda! That is your director, show some respect!" Yagami reprimanded.
"Oh, sorry, si- Hang on, you're the one watching him shower!"
"Well, I'm making sure he doesn't kill us all!" Yagami said in defense.
"I'm pretty sure he's not going to kill us while he's singing the shower!"
"He might- Wait, he's doing what?" Matsuda was right. Kitamura was singing in an incredibly deep voice.
"LOOOOOOOOOOLOLOLOLOOOOOOO!" He sang.
"What is that?" Matsuda wondered.
"I think it's opera." L mused.
"LOLOLOOOOOOOOAR! I LOOOOOOOOOOOOO-"
"Matsuda! Never laugh at your superiors!"
Matsuda wasn't listening. In fact, he burst out laughing. He fell to his knees, holding his sides and laughing like Light, who he sometimes saw laughing randomly by himself. Even L started to chuckle.
"OOOOOOOOOOOVE TO SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING !" Kitamura finished, before turning off the shower and leaving with a towel wrapped around his waist.
The only sound in the room was Matsuda's laughs, which had slowly died down to giggles (for manly men giggle).
"We will never speak of this again." Yagami ordered.
"Agreed." L said emotionessly.
Matsuda finally stopped paughing and climbed slowly to his feet. "Agreed." He started to leave, but paused at the door.
Matsuda snickered. "Do you have mind-bleach?"
"Matsuda!" Yagami yelled. Matsuda ran off, his paughter echoing down the hall.
"Mr. Yagami?" L asked.
He sighed. "Yes, Ryuzak?"
L looked at him and with utter seriousness said "Do you really have mind-bleach?"
AN: Look up on youtube "Trolling Samuran" or something on youtube to find out how Kitamura was singing. Oh, I have a Face Book account called OhMy Leppy. Go say hi, I post spoilers, excuses, ideas, ramblings and questions there. And other stuff. Farewell, my creatures!