[[A/N: This started off as something I wanted to do for fun and kill time. It was supposed to be something short but ended up taking longer than I thought to finish when the plot started changing to a slightly different one that I originally thought…
I was tempted to write something that makes Mikoto's death less sad since mostly what I saw are like sad fics after he died. I don't really ship either Suoh/Munakata or Suoh/Totsuka so when I decided that I wanted to write something to make Suoh's death on a lighter note, this pairing just came to mind.
It got pretty much out of hand and mostly what I type out in class on my phone near the end. So it is probably Out Of Character in some sense since I'm not sure if I managed to grasp their character completely. Grammar mistakes most likely too, I'm a little lazy to read through them all after school. So erm… read at your own risk? Obviously contain spoilers from episode 13 and a bit of the Novel. There's really few dialogues too, I have never been good at balancing such things… ]]
Now that everything was over, Suoh felt that a heavy load had finally left his shoulders. Ever since Totsuka died, there was this heaviness he felt weighing on his body. Suoh never knew that Totsuka was that important to him and how much he depended on him till he died.
Suoh had actually missed seeing Totsuka's face around and his strange whims. Those times when Totsuka tries to persuade him to join him on one of his new hobbies were really annoying but now he actually longs to hear them again. Waking up and not seeing him around and the bar felt a lot emptier without his presence and it felt like something was missing. The bar was a lot quieter without him too despite the loudest member being Yata.
The couch where Totsuka liked taking afternoon naps at felt like something was missing and Suoh was unable to look at it for long. But he ends up sitting there often anyway since could feel a little of Totsuka's presence there just like all the things Totsuka left behind in the bar.
It was annoying at first when Totsuka first started clinging to him and following him around with his silly smile. The guy was way too optimistic for him and a little strange. It took a while before he grew used to the other's presence and uncaring towards what unusual thing Totsuka did.
Suoh came to understand that Totsuka is a little different from other people, especially his thoughts. He had to admit that Totsuka had a strange charm that seemed to make people relax and lower their guard around him no matter who they are.
Kusanagi seemed to be alright with Totsuka hanging around the bar and he had no complaints with Totsuka following him around. Except when they both chide and him for his actions and behavior. He rather gets scolded by Totsuka than Kusanagi though since it felt lighter on the ears and Totsuka's scolding were more like persuasion. Totsuka would still smile during those times and he seems to understand Suoh's feelings more than he likes him to and the reason behind his actions.
It would be more of Totsuka asking him to be more careful and that he could help him if he needs him since he is his Vassal after all. It still felt strange whenever he hears Totsuka calling him King though when he could never understand what Totsuka sees in him.
It came as a shock when he actually ended up being a King like Totsuka expected all along. Totsuka insisted on making him his clansmen and Suoh consented without arguing. Totsuka had always insisted on being his Vassal anyway and he was fine with that after all.
Suoh remembered being amused when Totsuka turned out to be lacking in the strength department when he gave him his powers. But it was just like him anyway and Suoh was actually relieved at that. He had always secretly thought that fighting did not suit Totsuka and a peaceful serene place suits Totsuka more than a battleground.
Totsuka had always been less useful in fights although he still refused to leave when Suoh ended up offending people. It had been that way even before he became King so it was nothing new to him. There were times that the fights managed to not escalate because of his presence and because of that, Kusanagi often asked Totsuka to go with him if he goes out.
Unlike Totsuka, Kusanagi would have a harder time getting Suoh to stop himself from going overboard. Suoh was not at all surprised when Totsuka's powers turned out to be something that was way different from the others. It might not be offensive, but it was something that suited Totsuka perfectly.
The power to tune in to the flames from anyone in Homra. Just like his gentle self, no matter how hot or strong the flames are, they would disperse away around Totsuka. Very much similar to how Totsuka has the ability to stop fights from escalating with his presence.
Suoh had always been grateful towards Totsuka for stopping him before he loses control and burns everything away. It was something only Totsuka could do and no matter how much Totsuka thinks of his powers as weak compared to the rest, it is one that Suoh really depends on.
The only one can call out to him during the times when he loses all thoughts and control and letting the power overwhelm him is always just Totsuka. Suoh always calmed down the instance he felt Totsuka's presence from him tuning his flames with Suoh's, a soothing and relaxing sensation would cool him off and regain his consciousness. It prevents him from going berserk and getting too addicted to power.
The hand on his back was equally soothing along with the soft and gentle voice that Totsuka used to call him. A simple word was all that it took to call him back to reality and for whatever rage he had to disappear. Totsuka was the only shackle that Suoh did not mind having because he is the one that keeps him in control.
The shackle of being a King had too much responsibility for his liking, Suoh had never been one that was alright with being tied down and bound to rules. He would much rather be a stray animal roaming around freely than to be a King.
Each increasing member is yet another shackle tying him down and taking his freedom away. But the one who caused that was himself. An irresponsible King is what he is, he lets people who have the guts to try and see if they are compatible with the flames to join on a whim without even caring about their past and history.
Despite knowing that each member that joins gives him more responsibility, Suoh does not care when he gives them a shot. He was already tied down, more chains would not matter and it was not like he really controls what they do.
Restriction was not what he would do but he would do the necessary if they ever go beyond what they are supposed to do. Sometimes Suoh worries that he would lose himself to his power and stop being himself and that is when Totsuka comes in.
No matter how lost he is, Totsuka always manages to bring him back and hence why Totsuka is the only shackle he is happy to have tying him down. Kusanagi sometimes referred to Totsuka as the 'King's restraints' as a joke. As long as Totsuka is around, Suoh can be the him before he was a King. The way that Totsuka treats him never changed from before he was a King to now and that was his source of comfort for some normality in his life.
Kusanagi knows that Suoh dislikes being referred to as a King and treats him the same as before but unlike Totsuka, there are times when he reminds him of his responsibility as a King and that makes Suoh uncomfortable.
Totsuka treats Suoh as him more than the Red King or leader of Homra and that was something he always welcomed. Totsuka's carefree nature was something he was envious of and at the same time, something that he liked having around him. In return, Suoh continued being the King that Totsuka wanted him to be.
Being around Totsuka was natural and that allowed him to be completely at ease around him. Although that carefree nature of Totsuka irritated him sometimes when he ended up getting pulled along with what Totsuka wanted to do. Worst of all how much Totsuka got into trouble and and getting injured. He never showed his concern but Suoh always made sure to make those people pay for hitting him.
Ever since he became King, there was always this dream where he loses control of his powers and having his sword falling down on him just like his predecessor. Totsuka picked up on that rather quickly much to his annoyance.
To get him off his back, Suoh had ended up telling Totsuka about his dream one day. Totsuka had told him that it was probably because he predecessor died that way that he gets the illusion that it might happen to him one day too. Even though Totsuka told him that such a thing would not be fall him, Suoh knows one day his powers would destroy everything around him, even himself.
Whenever that happens, Totsuka would ask if he had a bad dream or assure him that everything would work up. The thing that actually put him more at ease were Totsuka's words and presence, especially when Totsuka swear that his powers are for protecting and not destroying.
Suoh remembers scoffing often at those words when all he ever did with his powers were beating up people and nothing more. But when he sees the absolute trust and faith reflected in Totsuka's eyes, Suoh could convince himself to believe him at least a little.
Totsuka stays over at the bar often and during nights when he has those dreams, he would end up going down to the bar and finding something to drink. He met Totsuka there by chance once and the male instantly could tell he had that dream again.
"King. Did you have a bad dream?" Suoh ignored him and took a sip of his drink, hoping the alcohol would serve as a distraction for his nerves. The pressure at the seat next to him informed him that he would not have the peace he would prefer.
"…What do you want?" He questioned irritatedly, he wanted to sleep and he hated whenever he had those dreams. Those dreams just makes him wonder why on earth he was chosen to be the Red King when he had no qualities a King should have. Totsuka would argue if he says that out loud and rebuking that he is a good King.
The drink in his hand was swapped away and Totsuka placed it away from his reach. The smile on Totsuka's face was gentle just like always and before he knew it, Totsuka was already tugging him out of the seat. "Come on, King. You're tired aren't you?"
"…" It was not like he did not want to sleep, more like he was unable to fall asleep. Whenever he wakes up from that dream, it takes him forever to fall back asleep and he barely manages to go back to slumber before morning at times.
He supposed being back in his bed was better than nothing and even if he did not want to, some way or another he would be pulled into Totsuka's pace anyway. He might as well comply and save his energy. Suoh was surprised when Totsuka ended up crawling into the bed and laid down beside him. "What are you doing?" Totsuka had his own room and he was irritated enough about his lack of sleep already.
"I'll help keep the bad dreams away from you. Don't think about it, sleep will come for sure." Totsuka's voice was soothing although the patting on his head annoyed him. Did Totsuka think he was some kid that needed to sleep with his mother after a nightmare?
"I could even sing you a lullaby—" Suoh instantly shut him up by punching him on the head. Totsuka's presence was calming, just like how his mood would end up better when Totsuka is around. Maybe it was due to the things that Totsuka always said to him that made him relax or it is just the guy's nature that gave him that feeling.
Whenever he had those dreams, Totsuka's presence and words always made him feel better and distract him away from it. He scoffed mentally at that when he still thinks that Totsuka's words of saying that his powers are for protecting and that words like that actually manages to relax him.
Suoh never told Totsuka that he actually likes having his company during those times and neither would he ever admit that. Totsuka might be strange and someone that tires him out but Suoh likes having him around regardless.
He ignored Totsuka's small cry of pain and directed a glare towards him despite knowing that it would not even affect him. "Are you trying to mess with me?" He questioned tiredly, not in the mood for Totsuka's teasing currently. Totsuka had a bad habit of liking to tease him at times and trying to mess with him.
"Eh? But I'm just trying to help you fall asleep, King." Totsuka protested with a tone that sounded like he had no idea what Suoh was saying. Suoh had a feeling that Totsuka had a good idea what he meant.
Arms wrapped around his back seconds later and he stared confusedly at him. Totsuka smiled in response, confusing him even further. "Just go to sleep, King. Everything will end up alright. I'm going to prove to you that nothing's going to happen staying here tonight so you can just go to sleep without worrying about a thing."
The warmth Totsuka was giving off was inviting and he felt his eyelids growing heavier. "Who's worrying?" Suoh was tired and Totsuka's arms around him were not uncomfortable and he closed his eyes slowly. Totsuka's fingers were tracing circles in an attempt to make him relax and he admits to himself that it was actually working. Just like usual, he could feel himself relaxing already.
"Sleep well, King." Totsuka whispered softly and he could feel the dream he had earlier getting further away from his thoughts almost like they never existed. Suoh knew he was just temporarily distracting himself and it would come back to haunt him again soon but for now, he allowed sleep to lull him in.
Suoh remembered waking up to a faint scent of cinnamon in the morning whenever Totsuka slept in his bed. After that night, Totsuka would crawl in uninvited whenever he finds out that Suoh had those dreams again and no matter how Suoh tries to kick him out, Totsuka would refuse to budge and he ends up giving in because he was too tired to argue.
At least that was how it was at first. Suoh grew used to having Totsuka sleeping next to him that he barely shows any response whenever Totsuka crawls into his bed. In fact, it was almost strange for him when Totsuka was not around.
Totsuka had argued with him once saying that maybe he should sleep in there once every two days to help him sleep better. The dreams stayed away whenever Totsuka was around and Suoh was aware that this arrangement was something that helped Totsuka as well.
He had noticed that Totsuka seemed much more energetic during days when he slept beside him and perhaps Totsuka was suffering from nightmares of his own. People who appear carefree with the brightest smiles often hide a darkness deep inside themselves. To ensure that no one else suffers just like them, they would give off a personality that brightens up their surroundings.
Suoh never asked to see if he was right though, he knows his own boundaries and it seemed to be something Totsuka could handle on his own. Suoh was well aware of Totsuka's dysfunctional family, being raised by a neglecting adoptive father who was addicted with gambling. Suoh recalled being stunned when Totsuka told them about his family problems after Kusanagi forced him seeing that the bubbly male was strangely pale during their meeting.
It was hard to believe that Totsuka's family problem was that bad that sometimes they had no money to pay for bills and food, not to mention his school fees. Totsuka had never said a word to him and he had punched him for not telling him about it.
The signs of that were pretty faint when Totsuka was always smiling and carefree, Suoh never imagined that he had such problems. Totsuka possessed a strong inner strength, Suoh was certain of that when Totsuka could still smile during times like that and act like nothing was wrong.
Suoh paid more attention towards Totsuka after that. To solve Totsuka's school fees problem, Kusanagi had offered to home-school him and his homeroom teacher, Anna's aunt also offered help. It became more apparent that Totsuka's cheerful nature was not completely natural, part of it must have been his way of subconsciously protecting himself.
But it must have grown on him that it had started becoming real for Totsuka and Suoh could read his smiles and laughter after some time of observing him. Totsuka's laughter might be annoying at times but during times when he needs it, they were melodies to his ears.
Totsuka liking to pick up new hobbies were probably something to distract himself and letting him experiencing things that he was unable to do during his childhood. It was partly because he understood why that he allowed himself to be pulled along some of the time when Totsuka asked him along.
There were times were Totsuka's smiles are dimmer and less from his heart, Suoh could tell completely. Tonight was a good example, Totsuka had dragged Suoh to bed at Kusanagi's instructions and he was just standing there at the door without saying a thing or looking at him.
"Aren't you going to crawl in?" Suoh asked boredly, watching Totsuka who blinked in surprise. Suoh was well aware that it was not one of their agreed nights where Totsuka would sleep beside him but it seemed like Totsuka really needed his company. This was probably the only thing he could do for him, even if he asked him what was wrong, he doubted that he could do much about it.
Consoling or comforting people was not one of his strong points and neither did he know what to do during such situations. The only source of comfort he could provide Totsuka with was just this, as much as he hated that he could do so little for the person who always helped him. Just like with Totsuka's family problems, he could at most just have him eat with him and sleep over at the bed.
"Eh? You're actually letting me?" Totsuka asked in shock and Suoh scoffed in response. Why was he that surprised in him asking him that when he had been crawling into his bed more times he could count since Suoh had been too lazy to bother counting and keeping track.
"Won't you just get in no matter what I say?" Totsuka chortled in response and crawled in, making Suoh relieved that Totsuka regained most of his original self back. He would ask Totsuka about it tomorrow if nothing changes.
"I guess King really does know me well." Totsuka replied and Suoh merely hushed him with a light punch on his head and asking him to just go to sleep. The soft thanks Totsuka whispered only made him even more aware of how little he could do for him.
Suoh watched him for a while, wanting to make sure that Totsuka was alright. The slumbering male beside him shivered, his face contorted in pain. Without thinking, Suoh wrapped his arms around the smaller male's body, softly telling him that he would protect him from all the things making him like this away.
Totsuka relaxed slightly and Suoh tightened his grip, staring at Totsuka's face before closing his own eyes. It was the first time he had ever initiated a hug, this being something big for him. He had always avoided things like this when all his hands could do was destroy and the first time he actually wanted to protect something. This was probably going to be the first and last time he would ever do something like this, Suoh did not trust himself enough to not end up destroying the person in his arms.
Especially someone like Totsuka who do not have powers to fight him back if he loses control. Suoh had always feared that one day he would go so far that even Totsuka would not be able to call him back. Just for tonight, he would keep his arms wrapped around him. Suoh used the excuse that it was to keep Totsuka sleeping softly to do that and burying the thought that he wanted to keep him in arms longer.
Totsuka was awake when Suoh woke up in the morning. The knowing expression on Totsuka's face informed him that Totsuka understood the reason behind the arms around him and Suoh removed his arms silently. "King, thanks." Totsuka smiled warmly at him before leaving the room.
His arms felt empty and cool once Totsuka left and Suoh brushed it off as an after effect after having them around a warm body for a whole night. He refused to admit that it was one of the most sound sleep he had for a while.
After Totsuka's adopted father died, he started staying in the bar permanently. It was then Suoh finally realised the full extent of how Totsuka's mind works. That night, Totsuka had told him casually that he was abandoned at a park by his real parents when he was three. His adopted father and mother found him and took him in. He had never resented his parents for abandoning him and he was not resigning to fate too, Totsuka merely accepted it as part of life. Things happen in life, both good and bad ones, this was merely just one of them.
The world had lots of interesting things and a bit of trouble was not enough to make him unhappy. Because he was interested in everything, he was never bored and he could easily find games that did not cost money to pass his time."I used to think of my adopted father as a bad friend and when I did, things seemed less bad. Then when he started staying away longer, I brushed it off as him being called away by the wind. He always apologies when he gambled away all the money away. I should have let him reflect on it but I always comforted him anyway."
Suoh could understand where Totsuka's catchphrase came along now. It must be something Totsuka said to himself and his adopted father all the time in the past that it became natural for Totsuka to say it and think that. Humans have the ability to adapt to different conditions and Totsuka's past had warped him accordingly. A person's heart and mind will accustom to those situations to adapt and fit in to the situation. "My childhood was really interesting. When we had no money to buy food, I would read a book and create a meal out of edible grass and herbs I could find!"
Totsuka paused, looking at Suoh with a small smile. "I told you earlier right? About him calling me coldhearted. He said that I could live nonchalantly when my parents abandoned me and even with a father like him, I still remained the same. He even said that it's because I'm like that that he was unable to change. He also told me that even though I'm interested in anything, I don't cling to anything."
Totsuka chuckled before continuing. "I didn't get how that meant I'm coldhearted back then. In my eyes, the world is overflowing with truly interesting things and I never had any fear losing anything or loathing to part with something I lost since the world is still filled with other interesting things."
Suoh's expression remained the same after that revelation, although mentally he thought that this was Totsuka's subconscious adapting to his situation and preventing him from being hurt. It was sad but at the same time the best defense a person could have. Without clinging to anything, you would be fine no matter what happens. This was how Totsuka could be cheerful all the time but even then there are times when a person is unable to bear those thoughts completely and Suoh doubted that Totsuka noticed that he gave in to his inner darkness at times.
As long as Totsuka did not lose himself completely, Suoh did not care to mention it to him. He shifted his attention back towards Totsuka to continue listening. "He hoped that one day I would find something important that I would want to cling to it." Of course he would. The way Totsuka was living currently was no way a happy life or normal. It was similar to how Suoh lived, a life without any real meaning.
He blinked when Totsuka flashed him a genuine bright smile. "That's when I met you, King." Suoh had smacked Totsuka earlier when he went to Totsuka's adopted father's funeral near the end. Totsuka had talked about his adopted father calling him coldhearted and Totsuka calling himself heartless when he was not crying and merely saying what he thought of him.
Suoh understood then that Totsuka was actually sad but he had no idea how to show it. Now he understood why that was so. Because of the way Totsuka thinks, he was unable to allow himself to cry or show emotions about that.
Back then despite not knowing that, he had known that Totsuka was sad and unable to show it for some reason. Suoh did not want him to think about that much and he merely hinted that it was okay. "Come on. You wanted to see me become King, didn't you?"
It was his way of offering comfort and judging from the smile on Totsuka's face earlier, it showed that it helped. Totsuka seemed unaffected when they returned back to the bar but Suoh could tell otherwise. Totsuka was spending his time and acting like his usual self and Suoh decided to play along.
He knew that Kusanagi had things to say to him too and he much rather Totsuka to approach him by himself. Suoh was going to act as his usual self and hence he just returned back to his room. Judging from how Totsuka came by looking more like his usual self, unlike the pretense he put up earlier. Kusanagi must have said something to help change his mood. Suoh was silent when Totsuka came in and the only response he gave was sitting up and looking at him.
That was how they ended up in this conversation. Totsuka's words had him blanking for a while before he ruffled Totsuka's hair. He supposed he was what Totsuka meant by something he viewed as important. Suoh continued saying nothing and merely grunted as a reply.
"I always wanted you to be a King since we first met, there was something about you that just screamed the aura of a King to me and I was really happy when you really became one. I'll be always be pushing you forward as King with all of my body and mind." Totsuka commented with an even bigger smile.
This was Totsuka telling him what he thought of him, Suoh thought silently to himself. Despite Totsuka's words, he really did not change the way he treated him. Or maybe it was because Totsuka had been viewing him as a King right from the beginning. "...Just sleep already."
He shifted to give Totsuka space and Totsuka gratefully scooted in. Totsuka moved towards him and shifted till he tucked his head under Suoh's chin comfortably. "Good night, King…" Totsuka was obviously wiped out and with his state of mind and being unable to show his sadness must be tiring.
Suoh hesitated on whether or not he should push him off and in the end, he just patted him on the head. It was fine with Suoh if Totsuka wanted him to be King, he was forcefully given the post of Red King by the 'Slate' anyway. The way that Totsuka treated him was alright with him since the one who kept him in place is Totsuka after all.
Besides, Totsuka was content with how he was acting anyway, as long as Totsuka's definition of a King does not require him to change how he acts as himself. He knows those words were signs of Totsuka trying to tie them together. He was no doubt the heart that ties Totsuka with everyone else here, a place that they both value.
Suoh had never paid much thought towards their sleeping arrangement. The both of them were just sharing a bed and helping each other besides themselves and he never thought that it would change.
When Suoh first heard Kusanagi informing him that Totsuka died, he had hoped Kusanagi was joking. But it was no joke, Kusanagi's tone was solemn and regretful and he repeated to him again. "Mikoto. He's really—" Suoh hanged on him.
Suoh knew all along that Totsuka showed no concern to his own life. It was apparent when he continued sticking to Suoh even after the number of times he got pulled into fights and getting injured. The way he acted without thinking all the time and getting into situations where he almost loses his life. But he never thought that there would be a day where he would really get into trouble and pay with his own life.
Totsuka had never viewed himself as important, he was most likely ranked at the lowest in his own heart. Just like how Totsuka did not treat things as important, his own life was no exception. The way that Totsuka would head out towards danger without thinking or being careful showed how much he cared about himself and that always angered him when no matter how much he asked him to be careful, Totsuka never did change.
Everything was annoying. Suoh found himself angered by every little thing, especially with himself. Why was he unable to protect Totsuka? His powers really were useless if they could not even protect a single person and the anger built up when he recalled how Totsuka told him that his powers were meant for protection.
He had ended up blowing up and burning things in anger once he stepped out of the bar. It was hard for him to admit that Totsuka really was dead even though he knows that Kusanagi would never joke at something like that. Suoh waited outside for them to come back, lighting up cigarettes after cigarettes till he finally spotted them.
When Kusanagi and Yata came back with Totsuka's body, he had stared at the body like it was a joke where Totsuka would just wake up any time soon. Kusanagi eyed him cautiously when Suoh moved closer and gripped Totsuka's hand. The body was so cold unlike the warmth he remembers whenever he sleeps beside him on his bed. The familiar cinnamon scent was present but it hardly mattered when it finally registered to him that Totsuka Tatara really was dead.
He remembered bursting into laughter so much that his body shook. The tears never came despite the fact that Suoh was weeping deep inside his heart. Kusanagi looked worriedly at him like he had lost his mind and maybe that really was true.
Suoh growled and punched the chair beside him in anger when Kusanagi told him that the sorry Totsuka muttered was probably directed to him. For the first time, Kusanagi had not told him off for destroying his furniture.
If Totsuka knew that this would trouble him, he should have been more careful. Suoh understood what that sorry was for. It was to apologise for leaving and troubling him and being unable to help keep his dream away. He was angry with Totsuka but what was the point when he was already dead and there was nothing he could do.
They soon showed him and the rest of the last video clip that Totsuka recorded and his face turned red with rage. He carved the face and voice of the one who proclaimed to be the Colourless King deep inside his memory, the one who killed Totsuka. The strong emotions were overwhelming him, rage being the most dominant one along with sorrow.
Suoh barely even registered what was going on anymore and he left them without a word. The bed felt cold when he recalled how Totsuka would not be there anymore. Rage was building up and soon it took over his thoughts. He was angry at the Colourless King and at himself. A part of him wished to take Totsuka's place and be the one who was killed instead.
He had to find the one who killed him and make him pay for his action, that was for sure. Suoh knows this was not something Totsuka would want him to do, Totsuka would never want him to get revenge for him by using his powers for destruction and risking his life but it was something he had to do. Suoh already knew what would end up for him already, however he was going to see to it to the end.
Especially when he had lost all logic and falling asleep was so hard to do. There was nothing left to restrain him and he could feel his powers losing their control. Suoh returned back to the bar later, Kusanagi looking relieved to see him looking calmer. Now that he made up his mind, there was no need for him to vent his anger on anything else for now.
Suoh poured all his thoughts into revenge, not wanting to think of anything else. It took a week before they finally pulled off the idea that Kusanagi thought of. It was a slow week for Suoh who spent his time spacing out and sleeping little. During that period of time, he had gotten his ear pierced in the same spot as Totsuka, the earring being the one that Totsuka worn.
It was the only thing he took with him to remember Totsuka by. No one asked him about it or even mention a thing when they first noticed his piercing. It gave him a small feeling as in Totsuka was around and if he was going to die, he was going to die with it.
The dreams returned in full force now that Totsuka was no longer around to calm him and for the first time, he actually welcomes them. Suoh was no longer affected by them, maybe because his life no longer holds any meaning to him. It felt really empty ever since Totsuka left and he found himself seeking Totsuka's warmth subconsciously.
Nothing really felt warm to him currently and he distracts himself till it was finally time for them to act. He barely even felt anything anymore, almost like he was devoid of life and acting like a robot. He eats and drinks without really tasting anything or even remembering whether he ate or not.
He would like to act earlier but Kusanagi was right to plan it properly and for them to pull it off, they had to make preparations. Suoh was glad that he was finally able to get it done with once the preparations were done.
There was something that worried him though, Suoh did not mind dying but he did not want to die till he kills Totsuka's murderer. The best way to hold himself in check and trying to lure the Colourless King to him was probably just Munakata.
He willingly lets himself be taken in by Scepter 4, it being part of his plan right from the start. Anna and Kusanagi were probably the only two who understood his actions. Munakata would keep him in check, this would ensure that he would not die before the time he decided for himself. If he was going to die anyway, Suoh rather decides when and what he was dying for.
Suoh had a feeling that Munakata knew what his intentions were when he came to ask him to give up being the Red King. But still, Suoh was going to go along with his decisions. He long knew his powers were reaching their limits soon, that was the whole reason why he was here after all.
The dreams started to haunt him again while he slept in his cell. This time with additional things added in, bits and pieces of his memory with Totsuka replaying. The most dominant one being times when Totsuka reassured him of his powers being one of protection.
Totsuka's voice saying that kept playing in his dreams, as in mocking him as they showed him scenes from the video showing Totsuka's last moment. It showed him how much he was unable to protect the person important to him, his powers really were for destruction. Reflecting his thoughts of wanting to take Totsuka's place, he ended up with his bullet's wound. There was a soft voice chiding him that that wound was not his when he appeared in the usual place where his sword seemed about to drop.
But Suoh did not care how he dies as long as he got his revenge. Since his powers were for destruction, Suoh was going to destroy that guy, even if it meant destroying himself in the process. All he had in mind was just killing him, that was the only thing that kept him alive at the moment. Suoh did not want to think any further and neither could he.
All he could see in his mind was just Totsuka's smile and that aching pain in his chest when he remembers he can no longer see it. Life felt a whole lot emptier and less meaning now that Totsuka was no longer around.
Those laughter and smiles he took for granted were all gone now and he never thought they were that important to him till now. Suoh knew that Totsuka was the one restraining him from going out of control but he never noticed that it was Totsuka's presence that brightened up his live.
The times before he met Totsuka, he had spent his days boredly without caring about what he was going to do next. After meeting Totsuka, he actually had some kind of routine to follow. Meeting up with Totsuka and Kusanagi, getting dragged around by Totsuka among other things.
They were important memories to Suoh since they were the times before he became King with all the freedom he still had. As much as he liked the people he met after he became the Red King, Totsuka and Kusanagi were still the closest people he treasured. They were his first few real friends, his first clansmen, Kusanagi held his right hand and Totsuka held his left hand respectively when his flames first touched them.
Just like he thought, the flames accepted them. When people referred to them as his right and left hand man, they were actually correct to think that. The only ones who would reprimand him would just be the two of them.
The Colourless King ended up looking for him by himself like he thought. Suoh expected that since he had a feeling that the reason why he killed Totsuka was to get to him. He let the guy talk all he want, restraining his rage as the guy talked about Totsuka. That guy seemed to try taking over his mind but he managed to kick him out and in the process, locating where he was hiding.
Since Suoh already found where the Colourless King, he no longer had any reason to stay in his cell anymore. It was easy to break out, he could have done that any time but since he was just bidding his time, there was no reason to.
The blues trying to stop him were futile, now that Totsuka was no longer around to restrain him, his flames could be released in full and he stopped caring altogether, the power can overwhelm him as much as it like. Even Fushimi seemed surprised upon seeing his flame and Suoh could not blame him. He had never completely lose control before or releasing as much as he did now, he had some kind of small constraint.
Losing Totsuka meant losing all logic or him caring what happens if he does lose complete control. Kusanagi and Anna were there to greet him as expected and Suoh informed them where the Colourless King was currently located. Anna held on to him as usual and he remained silent the entire time, even when it seemed like she picked up what he was trying to do and what would happen to him.
"Even so, you're going?" She asked and Suoh did not answer her, she already knew what that silence meant. It might be cruel for Anna to know his decision and be unable to stop him but Suoh was still going to do it no matter what. It was what he decided on and nothing would change his decision.
When they reached the school, Suoh let Kusanagi to take charge of the members and for them to do whatever they want. The Colourless King probably looked different then the one in the video but when Kusanagi asked if they were to look for the male in the video, he said nothing. This was all a farce to draw the Colourless King out anyway. Suoh just had to be around when the Colourless King appeared. It was all going to end soon and he decided to take a rest till that time arrived.
Suoh wanted to be alone for a while as well. Anna came to look for him soon enough and Suoh did not have the heart to turn her away. This would be the last time he was going to accompany her too, Anna deserved that much. She already lost Totsuka the day before her birthday and he was going to cause her yet another important person.
Suoh was aware that out of everyone else, he was the most important one to her, the only one who allowed her to see the colour red. As much as he wanted to not make her sad, Suoh knew that he was unable to remain the way he was before and selfishly, Totsuka's revenge was more important.
Kusanagi joined in much later, talking to him about the past. When he talked about how he never expected Totsuka to be right about being a King, Suoh actually agreed. He held no qualities a King should have. He had abandoned his people all for his own selfish reason and not caring what happens to them. Suoh had enough of the empty feeling in his chest and the heavy weight on his shoulders, besides the one holding the title of the Red King. Kusanagi probably knew of his plans, the tone he used to talk to him about was different from his usual one.
Suoh was not exactly surprised when Munakata turned up to be the one Kusanagi mentioned about wanting to meet him. The purpose behind that was rather obvious too. The conversation started without any clear distinction of anything at first, Munakata revealing his intention much later. He must be really easy to read when a third person showed how he knew what he was planning to do.
Munakata's offer sounded nice but Suoh was not going to take it up. It was because of being the Red King that Totsuka died, he had to die with that title, the precious Red King that Totsuka loved. It would be meaningless if the Colourless King died in someone else's hands, he had to be the one to do that.
The emptiness would not disappear if he survived and not being able to kill the one that destroyed his world. If his powers destroyed the Colourless King with him together, that was fine. As long as he was the one that killed him. Suoh just wanted revenge, nothing more. There was nothing after that, he was going to die no matter what. That was the only thing that could save him now and for him to continue being himself.
Munakata left and Suoh let him be. Munakata could try to dissuade him as much as he likes but the outcome was going to be the same. No matter what, he was going to die with the Colourless King. All three possible outcomes all lead to both of them dying if he manages to kill him. His powers going berserk, the Colourless King managing to bring him down with him when he attacked or Munakata killing him to stop his sword from falling.
Suoh walked back towards the school building, sensing the person who called him over. One of them tried stopping him and resulting with the female with them to make an illusion. Suoh wondered what they were trying to pull with that and now that he finally found the person who killed Totsuka, why were these person getting in his way?
He angrily used his flames to disperse the illusion, there was no way something as weak as this could stop him. Just before he was able to make an attack on the person, one of them stopped him and Suoh instantly knew he was the 'Kuro Inu' that Yata failed to defeat before. As strong as he might be, it was nothing against his flames.
Munakata intercepted him later, something that Suoh expected to happen, Munakata had made it quite apparent that he was going to interfere after all. He allowed Munakata to distract him from his task though, one last final fight against Munakata would be interesting and he would not be able to do anything if Munakata gets in his way anyway.
Besides, Suoh was certain that the Colourless King would come and look for him on his own. The fight against Munakata ended up making him being more serious then he thought he would. Perhaps it was the last time that he could fight against him that he was giving it more than he was supposed to.
Suoh made sure not to overdo it though, he could not risk losing control now. Munakata was still talking about wanting to help him and it was very much out of character for Munakata to act the way he did today. But this was something he could not let go, he has to do it no matter what the cost.
The Colourless King showed up as expected but with a twist. Someone else in the same body as the Colourless King came but Suoh made his move anyway. That person did ask him to kill him, who was him to stop him? Suoh merely thanked him for bringing over to him for him before he attacked.
Suoh could hear Munakata asking him to stop and he ignored him as he unleashed his flames. The Colourless King died, Suoh was certain of that. Now that everything was finally over, he felt really light and free from all the chains and shackles that were tying him down.
"Sorry for making you do all the dirty work." Suoh apologised, it was the only thing he could do to show his gratitude. Suoh did not regret his decision at all, even when his sword seemed to be really falling down like how it always did in his dream.
"Don't give me that garbage with such a peaceful look on your face. If you really feel that way, wasn't there something you could've done… before this happened?" This was something he would never be able to make up to Munakata, no matter how apologetic he was feeling.
Instead of feeling regret, there were nothing like that at all. Even after all that and seeing how it affected Munakata, Suoh still wanted to be selfish. Life was meaningless to him ever since Totsuka died, he should have thought of the people around him and prevented such an ending but he just could not do it.
He had never been a person who would put himself in people's shoes and a person who acts on his own whims without considering the consequences. Suoh knew how the members from Homra were going to suffer from his death but they were nothing compared to his feelings.
Totsuka was ranked much higher than Homra in his heart and even if he made himself live, his life would still be empty and the hole in his heart would never heal when he lost the person who made living worthwhile for him. He had always been living just for the sake of living and never really finding something to make him feel worthwhile.
It slowly dawned to him that the reason why he was willing to go so far and be selfish even at the cost of his death to accomplish this one goal was due to his own feelings that he never noticed. Such an irony for him to realise that he is in love with Totsuka just moments before he dies. To him, it was definitely worth it and he could not help but smile at himself.
He really should have noticed but he took Totsuka for granted, the male had always been with him and Suoh actually believed that it would always remained the same, hence why he never paid much attention to his own feelings.
Such a good King he turned out to be, he placed his own emotions above the people following him. He was tired, really tired. The shackles of being a King was much too heavy for him to bear now, they had always been too much for him. With this, he could release himself and get revenge at the same time.
Nothing beats that. Suoh was never really around anyway, Homra would be alright even without him. He believes that firmly, Kusanagi was the one who looked after them most of the time anyway and he was sure that he would continue to do so. They could hate him for his selfishness all they want, he would not blame them. He just wanted to free himself and the only one shackle he was willing to have was gone. He would lose himself sooner or later anyway, he might as well choose the time he dies instead.
"You've said enough…Munakata." Suoh directed a smile at him, this time one that was meant for him. The last and final thanks that he could give him. Their conversation was over. Even before Munakata took action, Suoh long knew this would happen.
Suoh never worried about his sword falling, Munakata would never let that happen and that was why he could do as he liked without caring. Munakata never wanted to do this though, that was why he was trying so hard to stop him but Suoh did it anyway regardless of what he thought.
He opened his arms wide, watching as the sword starting falling faster. A signal for Munakata to hurry up and kill him already. He watched the sword calmly, laughing mentally at how this used to haunt him in his dreams and now he was all so ready to accept it. Losing an important person paid such a big part in his will to wanting to be alive.
The sword that stabbed him was slow, Suoh almost thought that he would not make it. He had his eyes closed and a content smile on his face when the sword finally stabbed him. Suoh patted him on his shoulder, silently telling him not to blame himself for this before he muttered his last words.
Anna was seeing this, no doubt she was. This was the least he could do for her, apologise to her about his selfishness. "I'm sorry…Anna. I won't be able to show you that pretty red anymore." That was all he could manage before he lost all his consciousness completely.
When he came to, the place he was at was completely foreign to him. Did he end up in some afterlife place? Suoh looked around boredly, not really caring where he was much. He never felt this feel in years although the emptiness he had never filled completely. Killing the Colourless King had made him feel less empty but not completely.
"…King?" Suoh's eyes widened when he heard the familiar soft voice that he had been wanting to hear for a long time. When he turned around, Totsuka was blinking confusedly as he looked at him and Suoh knew that Totsuka was not expecting to see him here. He walked closer, watching intently to make sure that he was not hallucinating.
He watched amusedly as Totsuka rubbed his eyes and stared at him when he realised that Suoh really is standing in front of him. "But why is King here…? Don't tell me…" His amusement died the instant Totsuka's expression changed and he scowled in response. He was well aware of what Totsuka was currently thinking.
"Hn. You sound like you're not pleased to see me." He knows it was far from that but right now, he just wanted to stop Totsuka from making that expression. Despite that Totsuka was always smiling and cheerful regardless of what happened, Suoh knows that he hides a deep sadness inside him that he hides with smiles.
He never says anything, it was not his place. But he was always watching silently to make sure that it was nothing bad. Suoh would question him if it was anything serious. He could make a guess what it was about when Totsuka started sleeping over at the bar more and the one that was getting better sleep by sleeping together was not just him. It was for Totsuka's own sake too.
Suoh observed as Totsuka's expression changed again, a sad smile appearing this time. "Of course not. I'm happy to see you again, King. But to see you here…that would mean that you died…" Suoh walked closer, the tone that Totsuka used earlier was totally unlike his usual one and dripping with remorse. It lacked the cheerful and playful tone Totsuka would usually use and a solemn look definitely did not suit him.
"Isn't that obvious?" He stated with an obvious tone. That was the only reason why he was finally able to see Totsuka again. His words seemed to make the smile on the other's face sadder and the usual glow in Totsuka's eyes completely died at that.
"Tch." That was not an expression he wants to see on Totsuka ever. It was like Totsuka finally gave in to the darkness inside him. Without saying a thing, Suoh pulled Totsuka forward and wrapped his arms around him. Totsuka was warm just like he remembered and he could smell the cinnamon scent that was always around when Totsuka was close. "King…I'm sorry… You're here because you tried to avenge me didn't you? It's my fault that King died…"
Totsuka paused and looked up at him with another sad smile, his face looking like he was about to cry. "I knew all along that I wasn't going to live long if I stayed with you, Anna told me that long ago. But I still wanted to be in King's company. I was alright with dying earlier if it means I get to stay with you… I didn't think it would cause your death too, King…" Suoh reached up and punched him on the head hard.
His death had nothing to do with Totsuka, it was something he decided on himself. Suoh was cracking, he had stopped being himself ever since Totsuka died. Because of him Totsuka died and now he was making Totsuka suffer because he blamed himself for his death. "Idiot. I caused this myself. If anything is to blame for my death it's myself. The one that decided to kill the Colourless King with my own hands despite knowing that it would cause my death was myself. I'm not a good King either. For my own selfish desire, I left them and even though I knew if my powers went out of control it would cause everyone else to suffer, I still carried on with it. I wanted to kill him no matter what because he caused your death."
Suoh chuckled. So much of a King he is. That was why he had always thought that there was a problem with him being the Red King. "What exactly did you see in me as a King? I'm nothing like one. I wasn't able to protect you, what use were those powers for? All I ever did with it was destroy and nothing more. In the end, I even abandoned all of those people who followed me just because I didn't want to be tied down anymore if you're not there. What kind of King thinks nothing about his life or about others' thoughts all because he lost someone important to him?"
"King is really kind. Because of your words and actions, people usually don't notice. King's kindness caused you to blame yourself for not being able to protect me. Despite the strong facade that King puts up, King lacks self esteem in himself. You never think of yourself as anyone better than others and instead think lowly of yourself. King does things in his own pace, not caring what others think because King has his own sense of justice. The way King will help people when others ignore it is a good example. King always just brush it off as the person in your way or some other excuses. Just like how you used your flames on Eric, you knew he had lost all reason to live and by making him a member, Fujishima would care for him and change his mindset maybe. It's King kindness and big heart that made Homra such a big family. It's King's important family too."
Totsuka's arms wrapped around his back and Suoh buried his face into Totsuka's hair. "I don't know what you're talking about. I nearly destroyed myself and everything else around me too if Munakata didn't stop me. I even endangered that important family you mentioned about to get revenge for you. Even though I knew Anna was sad enough that you died, I still carried on with my decision without hesitation. How am I kind?" Suoh commented with a laugh.
"You're an idiot, King. You didn't have to go this far. You're the King, you shouldn't be risking your life for a Vassal, it's not worth it. Much less a Vassal who couldn't fight or do anything. The reason why King acted selfishly was my fault, because of me you stopped thinking of anything else and losing your kindness. " Totsuka whispered into his shirt and he could feel his shirt getting wet from Totsuka's tears.
Suoh merely smiled in response to Totsuka's words. "I never behaved like a King in the first place. Whether or not my life was worth it is my own choice. You know how I act, without you around to hold me back, things were bound to end up like this. You're my anchor of control and sanity after all, when you died, all that was left of my control and sanity vanished along with you. The one that prevented me from going out of control and remaining as myself was you, you know that don't you? Yet you just selfishly died just like that."
Totsuka Tatara was the one thing that kept Suoh Mikoto as himself after he gained his powers. No, even before that. It was thanks to Totsuka always sticking around him that he did not lose himself. Before Totsuka came along, his life was a mess. He started fights or gotten in fights like they were nothing and his life revolved around in just fights.
Right after the male stepped into his life, Totsuka would persuade him not to fight so much and find something else to do. Totsuka never tries to restrain him completely though, letting him do what he wants. It was rather irritating at first when Totsuka dragged him along and forced him to do whatever his current hobby was.
But it was thanks to those that he got another view in life besides fighting. For the first time ever, Suoh actually felt what it was like to have someone with him. That was why it was worth it for him to pay with his life when it allowed him to get his revenge.
"I'm sorry. It's because I'm useless. King has never killed someone before and the first and last time you had to was because of me.. " Totsuka repeated and Suoh tightened his hold on him. If he had figured out his feelings earlier, maybe things would not end up like this. But it was fine, at least he had him with him again.
"If you're really sorry, stop doing things to worry me. There's no need to fake those emotions too. You're human too, there's no reason to put up that cheery facade all the time. Make sure that you won't leave like that again." Suoh replied in his usual tone of voice, this being something that was obvious to him.
Totsuka chuckled and he could feel him nodding his head. "I can't even if I want to, King. I'm already dead aren't I?" Suoh closed his eyes, the toll on his body disappearing completely. He had never put in thought on what he should do after he managed to get revenge.
"I'm tired..." He muttered softly, feeling Totsuka pulling back away from him. Suoh opened his eyes puzzledly, looking at Totsuka who smiled in response. He blinked, feeling even more puzzled.
A hand rested on his left cheek gently and Suoh continued watching him, waiting for an explanation. "You can rest now, Ki—Mikoto. Your journey is over, you can remain here and do whatever you want now, you're free. There's no longer any reason for you to tie yourself to anything or be shackled to anything. You're free from the title of King and you no longer have to let yourself to be shackled by me. You have the complete freedom to do whatever you want and it's time for me to let go too. I've been holding you back enough, I caused you your life and you can just rest now without thinking of anything. I tried to hold you down and tie you up with threads with you at heart to everyone else and the reason why you did not denounce your throne was because of me right? Back then, you decided to be the King that I wanted you to be, I'm glad to be able to become your Vassal. I'm sorry for making you tired with all of my whims and thank you for allowing me to by your side. You don't need anyone to restrain you now so it's good bye now, Mikoto."
Totsuka removed his hand, stepping back and flashing him a bright smile before turning away. Suoh scowled as he quickly pulled him back. "Had I ever said anything about you tying me down? You were the only shackle I didn't mind tying me down, the one keeping me as me was you. I could remain as myself was you, you prevented me from losing sight of myself. The one who continued being the King was me, even if I didn't act like one. You never forced me to keep it up or give up my life for you, I did everything of my own will."
Suoh took a step closer, releasing his hold on Totsuka. "Aren't you supposed to cling onto the thing you finally found as important?" He questioned and Totsuka still did not answer or turn around and he continued regardless.
"Are you really fine with this? Didn't you try really hard to keep this place you created with me at it's heart? You're just going to give it up?" Suoh's tone sounded nonchalant, there was no reason for him to show his anger in his words. If Totsuka really was able to let go, no matter what tone he used would not matter if it was not important to Totsuka.
It took a few seconds before Totsuka responded. "...There's always other interesting things left in the world. Losing one thing wouldn't make me unhappy and I don't just need one thing to achieve happiness." Totsuka was fisting his hand tightly, the nails clearly digging in his palms. Suoh scoffed. Did Totsuka really think he would not notice such a blatant lie?
"How about this then? What if I need you? Are you really going to be happy if you leave? It takes a broken person to understand a broken person exactly. The reason why we feel the same is this isn't it? A broken person who can't love himself can only be loved by someone else. The first one who started it first was you. You fell for me first and after you forcefully barged in, you're going to leave twice without thinking about me? The reason why we're so attracted to each other is because we have something that the other is lacking and being together gives the feeling of being completed. We never had to say our thoughts much when the other already can tell. Are you really able to find someone else to fill that emptiness inside you?" Suoh paused and rested his forehead on Totsuka's head.
"I won't be able to find someone else who loves me as much as you do or be able to fall for anyone else as deeply but you. The only one who understands me best is you and the same goes for you right? This emptiness only goes away when I'm with you. There are things that only fellow Kings can understand and they're drawn in together but the person called Suoh Mikoto is drawn in by Totsuka Tatara alone. My bond with you is unique and completely unrelated to me being a King or not. If you're not around, there's no reason why I should keep the title. If you're only interested in a King more than the person Suoh Mikoto then I'll let you go and accept your decision. Even after that, the one that will fill the emptiness in me will still only be you along with my feelings. If it's what you want, I can live by myself or with someone else but the one that I'm capable of loving is still you." This was what Suoh realised after he saw Totsuka again.
The fundamental of their relationship. Suoh felt Totsuka shifting and he took a small step back to give him space. Totsuka was looking down, making him unable to see Totsuka's expression. He waited silently for Totsuka's response. Totsuka's head rested on his shoulder as Totsuka whispered. "That's cheating. If you say it like that, I won't be able to bring myself to leave. King is always King to me, you're my only King. No matter which side of you it is, you're still my King. I made you tired out with the burden of King and yet you say you won't be able to love anyone else but me..."
Suoh smiled, petting him on the head. "But it's over isn't it? It's the end of the journey for the both of us isn't it? There's no need to search for anything else and just rest now. Say it, what do you really feel and want."
He could feel Totsuka gripping on his arm tightly and wrapped his free arm around Totsuka encouragingly to persuade him to speak up. "I... want to stay with you always because I love you. You're the only thing I never want to lose and the only person I'll cling to with all my might."
Totsuka's wrapped around his back to hug his back. "King, you're mean. You already know how I feel but you still forced me to say it." Suoh smirked, it was a payback for Totsuka trying to leave again and the best way to convince him to stay was this.
"That was the only way that would make you selfish and say out what you really want. And it isn't 'King' now is it?" Suoh never wants to lose the person in his arms again or have him leave him for that matter. It took a few years, losing Totsuka once and the both of them dying to have them finally acknowledging their feelings and saying it out.
In Suoh's case, he had never noticed it while Totsuka refused to admit to it to maintain his normalcy. It was the first time Totsuka actually wanted to cling to something important and by not acknowledging his feelings, he could act like how he normally does even if he loses Suoh. But Suoh had forced him to admit to his own feelings and destroying the self defense he had.
"That's not fair. You're still my King no matter what, I still want to call you King." Totsuka grumbled and without even looking, Suoh already know that Totsuka was pouting as he said that. But Suoh was not letting that get to him. He had enough about Kings and it would seem like their relationship did not change if he lets Totsuka call him that.
A new start requires changes, especially for the both of them. "If that's what you want then, Tatara. I'll just be your King and nothing more than that." Suoh was just messing with him now, unable to prevent himself from wanting to tease him. Besides it seemed like the best method to make Totsuka call him King lesser.
"Mean! Calling me by my first name for the first time in such a situation. You're not really giving me much of a choice now. I get it...Mikoto. But I'm still going to call you King from time to time~ Since you forced me to admit this, you have to take responsibility. I'll be clinging to you forever, even if you try to shake me off, I won't let go ever~" Totsuka winked gleefully at him and Suoh was glad to see him back to his usual self. This felt much better as compared to the Totsuka from earlier.
Flicking a finger at Totsuka's forehead, Suoh managed a small smile. "Do whatever you want." Totsuka beamed brightly in response, slipping his hand into Suoh's. He no longer had any need to spell things out so exactly and back to his usual few words. Totsuka would under anyway, Suoh knew when he should talk more and when he could keep his usual speech fashion.
"It's just going to be us till the rest arrive. I hope they don't come here as quickly as King though. We'll have to apologise to them at that time, they're probably mad that we left without saying a word." Suoh tightened their intertwined hands together as his reply. Of course they did not want the rest to come so soon, not because they did not want them to spoil their alone time but because they did not want them to die so soon. The both of them would of course rather they live out their lives longer.
" I hope we get to apologise to them when they arrive and live together again~" Totsuka added in cheerfully, his eyes sparkling with happiness. Suoh merely grunted in response, it would be a long time but they would wait. They had all the time in the world after all, now that they had finally settled down. Suoh would just savour Totsuka's presence and making sure he does not do anything foolish anyway. He was finally free completely, his journey had finally ended and allowing him to do whatever he wants.
"And before I forget, is that my earring you have there—" Totsuka asked teasingly, breaking Suoh's thoughts and him keeping silent which resulted in Totsuka chuckling. Suoh ignored him, Totsuka was obviously teasing him. But this was fine, after experiencing what life felt like without Totsuka, Suoh was alright with moments like these.
[[A/N: Can't really say that I'm pleased with this ending or writing actually. Something feels like it's lacking somewhere… ]]