Greater Than, Less Than, The Inequal.

Suggestion 1: Meeting in an Unusual Place

Disclaimer: Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto and Medaka Box is owned by NisiOisiN. Please support the official release.

This is another in my three series one-shots. Depending on my ideas and motivation, I may take this one up as a regular series.

I got looking through the manga series again and saw the end of the anime series a few days ago. The scene with Anshin'in addressing the viewers was really funny and I thought it was very well done. But my favorite part was definitely how Kumagawa just made that coloring kid his bitch.

So I decided to make another story. This one isn't about how Naruto takes over Kumagawa's place (although I should probably make that another fic). But he will be replacing Zenkichi in the story, but all the other characters will be the same, even his mother. I love the guy but I just thought that that would be a good way to go. I also may add Naruto characters as this is a world Naruto is born into, not thrown into.

So, here we go.


A vast, empty nothingness in all directions is all that could be seen. Nothing in the far gone horizon could be made out. But nothing before you could even be understood. The space could be white as the center of a none existing sun. Or as black as the far off idea of a black hole. Whatever it was, there was nothing. No up or down, left or right, right or wrong, life or death. Before anything was even capable of sustaining matter and life, there was nothing.

Before anything had ever been, there was nothingness.

"~Oh 999,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bottles of beer on the wall, 999,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 of beer. I take one down, I pass it around, I have 899,999,999,999,999,999,999,999 bottles of beer on the wall~"

Okay, so there is supposed to be nothing anywhere.

But in the vast recesses of nothing, was a possible existence. Of course, it also meant that everything else was possible and this was the patch of nothingness. But we have no place to say if it is or isn't. Perhaps it was just a ball of thoughtless emotions and ideas clumped together to from a state of consciousness in the void. Or perhaps it was the form of a beautiful, slender, brown haired woman in the nude. Singing as she waited for the oncoming bang to appear.

"Oh, it is so boring just waiting here. I wish I could just jump forward and make it appear already." The being said as she continued to float in place, scrunching her knees up to her chest. "But no~, I just had to wait for all this time, hoping that it would pass by quickly." She opened her eyes and looked at nothing, "wish there was something to do."

"You could start that singing thing again. That was pretty fun." The woman widened her eyes and jerked out of her closed position. She looked around and saw nothing again. "I think that you have a very nice voice."

"Who is there? Show yourself!" She continued to look around but still found no source to the mysterious voice she heard. She turned around once more and saw an image before her. A tall man, taller than her by at least a foot was before her. He had a very well-toned body that she could see from her position. And finally, he had blood red crimson eyes and hair that she couldn't help but notice. She eyed the man with a doubtful expression.

"Who are you?" The man had a wide smirk as he approached the small form of the lovely lady.

"I'm just like you. I found myself in this crap place some time ago and been wandering around trying to find something. And then I find you." He lifts his hand and gropes her exposed breasts in his hands. "And what a find I get" he said with a sultry tone in his voice. Before getting his head smashed in by the unchanged expression of the woman in question. "What was that for? All I did was feel some meat out there for the taking."

The naked woman grew a cruel smile on her face as she looked at the rude existence before her. "Well, maybe I will tenderize some meat I see in front if me as well." She extended her hand and grasped the man's skull in her palm. She squeezed with all her might and smiled as the new man screamed in agonizing pain. She continued to break the man's body into pieces as she found a new source of fun in the emptiness.

She laughed contently as the man twitched in the space he was in. She turned back around and looked at him as he seemed to regain his senses. "Well that was fun. Thank you for the entertainment, even if it started out quite unexpectedly, but I'm happy now. So you can leave now. You must be off to see the rest of this space before the boom happens."

"Hell no! I ain't leaving! I just found some hot meat I can grind in and you expect me to leave! I have to wait another 3 trillion something years until that bang comes along and I'm bored as fuck." He floated next to her, "can I please stay? I'll make you happy I did." He said as he wiggled his eyebrows at her with a hopeful look. She just looked at him with no change in her face, making him slightly deflate.

"I'm not going to wait with a fool like you for this place to get some life. I feel like I would be harassed every day. So no!" She said sternly as she avoided his attention. She could feel that he was still behind her, looking at her. She looked over her shoulder and saw that he was floating with his legs crossed over.

"Well I'm not leaving, so get used to my being here." She breathed out and rubbed her temples in relief. She was not going to get rid of this ass for a while now, she could just tell. She grumpily accepted his presence and floated in space again with her knees to her chest.

They stayed in silence for a few moments until his voice pierced the emptiness. "Do you have a name? I feel like this eternity would be easier to take if I knew the name of the person I existed with."

She let out a long sigh and prepared for his question. "I thought the name Ajimu Najimi was good. It just had a nice ring to it." She said as she thought that a name had finally given her a feeling of actually being. She smiled happily until she noticed that the man behind her was fidgeting in his spot. Probably waiting for his chance to say what his idea was. "*Huff* Okay, you are obviously going to wet yourself if you don't get to say what's one your mind. What is your ide-"

"I'm glad you asked! I am someone who will stand above all those that will come in the future. My very name shall cause fear to run down the backs of all that is and ever will be. When the time comes, I will defeat and destroy all those that even consider themselves strong. I AM KURAMA! MY WORD IS THAT OF GOD!" He screamed out as he entered a victorious pose.

All he got was silence.

He lowered his head to see Najimi looking at him with a deadpan stare. He shriveled up and clutched himself in a fetal position. She patted his back, trying to cheer him up.

"Don't worry; we have plenty of time to work on that."


The sounds of multiple footsteps and running sneakers could be heard throughout the glistening hallways. Men and women in white doctor coats rushed all around the hospital in search of their runaway patient. "Where is she?" "We've lost sight of her!" "Oh God, the director is gonna have my nuts for losing that girl!"

A small girl with a white coat walked through the crowd of rushing medical officers. She looked like a child with light blond hair and blue eyes, scratching her head as she listened to the overflowing of worried complaints by the nurses. She grumbled and then stopped her advances. "Everyone, listen up! Medaka-chan couldn't have gotten far. She hasn't gotten out of her house in a long time, so she wouldn't leave so easily. Just calm down and be vigilant, okay." All the doctors and nurses slowed down and calmed themselves.

The little girl cutely rubbed her temples and sighed as the doctors started cooing for the missing girl like a lost puppy. Just how so many genius doctors could lose sight of a patient so easily, she would never understand. She continued to walk through the halls until she was in front of a door reading 'director'. She knocked on the door and waited in silence.

"Come in." She heard the answer and opened the door. She walked in and saw a dandy looking man with green hair, writing down some paper work on his desk.

"Director Tsurubami, I have some news." She took in a deep breath and steeled herself for his reaction "Medaka-chan has escaped. We are looking for her as we speak but I must apologize for our negligence."

The man stopped his work and lowered his pen. He leaned his head back in his chair and looked up at the ceiling. He slowly made a throaty laugh as the girl behind him looked at him suspiciously. "I know." The girl looked up at him in surprise as he stretched out his hand and reached for a photo. "She wouldn't be Hato-Nee's daughter if she followed the norms, Hitoyoshi-sensei. That is just what we have to expect from Medaka-chan."

She looked at the picture he held in his hands that portrayed a man and woman together. The man had a lean face and was taller than the woman beside him. He had dark purple hair that had two bangs and two ahoges at the top of his head. The beautiful woman beside him had a sweet smile on her face and wore a pink kimono. She had light green, messy hair that reached her neck. She softened her face in a sad, understanding look. "I'm sorry for your loss director; it must be hard to have lost your dear sister. And that little girl must be experiencing similar pain like that."

"Heh, yes. I hope that someday I will be able to spend more time with Medaka-chan, but until then, it would be best to see what she can do. So continue looking for her okay." The loli-looking doctor agreed as she stepped back and prepared to leave but was interrupted by another question. "By the way Hitoyoshi-sensei, did I hear that you couldn't find someone to take care of your boy?"

"Oh yes, my little boy didn't have a babysitter so I brought him to the nursery center. Is that alright?"

The man had a good laugh as he nodded his head and let the young woman get back to her business. He went back to his work as he continued his personal work. 'Hm, maybe a new conduit to the flask plan is a little boy with no talents. If he has no abnormalities, I could fashion one out of him and make one compatible with Medaka-chan.' He looked back at the picture of his beloved sister. He smirked as he continued to work on his formula. One way or another, he would find a way to work with Medaka-chan.

Even if she wasn't her, he could make her Hato-Nee.

After all, he worked better with defected products.


Dozens of men and woman ran through the hallways, screaming out her name. She looked back over the corner to see that no one had spotted her. She ducked back behind the corner as several more nurses ran past her. The little girl in the pink dress continued to sneak past the worried workers like she was a Koga ninja. As she effortlessly weaved through the shadows, her mind wandered to what she believed to be the only problem she could not solve.

Why was she here?

What was her purpose?

Did she even have a purpose?

Did anyone?

"Seriously, what do they even mean 'what reason'?" The girl froze in her attempted escape as she thought back to the words that strange boy said to her. "They're all adults but they are missing the point. People are born for no reason, they live unrelated and die worthless sly. I bet you think the same thing to right...uh...Medaka-chan?" She felt her stomach drop at the empty, wicked smile the bunny carrying boy had as he challenged the existence to the people around them. The grey haired boy jumped to his feet and walked off as he was called for his appointment. "You ended a lot of people coming here, right? That's fine, whatever the two of us do is totally fine."

"Because there's no goal to life, there's no point to being alive."

The little two year old girl felt a growing sense of depression overcome her. She saw no possible exits to take in her worried state, and no hope. That is, until she saw a sign over a room that said 'Nursery Room'. She decided that it was the best option to take, so she moved toward the door and grabbed the handle, standing on her toes to reach it. She opened the door and quietly slipped through the crack. She silently closed the door to the childish room as more men ran past it.

She let out a quick breath as she had reached a safe point. She looked around at the new room she had escaped to. She then noticed that a small form in an orange hoodie was fiddling with some toys. The small child had continued to work with a wire puzzle as he started to grunt in irritation. He sighed in exasperation as he tossed the metal beside him as he turned to work on a 100,000 piece puzzle of the St. Basil Cathedral. He looked at two pieces and started to push the uneven sides together, growing angry that the pieces didn't fit.

The girl looked at the little boy's efforts in pity as she sighed and walked toward him. He noticed her coming toward him and looked up at her outstretched hand. "What?" The boy said in a soft, childish voice.

"Give it to me, I'll do it." She said in an arrogant, matter-of-fact tone. The visible part of the boy's face earned a miffed pout as he ignored the girl's offer. She raised an eyebrow in confusion "what are you doing? I said give it to me."

"No. I don't need some know it all little girl to do this. You probably couldn't do that metal thingy any better than I could." He said as he grabbed the wire puzzle again and waved it in front of her. In an instant, the wire was gone, in her hands, unhooked, and held in front of him. He gaped in shock at the pure ease the girl just showed as she held the puzzle up like she had pulled apart chopsticks.

He changed his gaze, looking embarrassed as he looked at the other toys around him. He held a jumbled Rubik's Cube in front of her as he walked back to the pile and grabbed another one and started working on it. "O-okay, let's try that again. I will race you to see who can solve this faster. And who ever wins is the b- NANI?!" He slightly yelped as he turned back around and saw that the girl had already fixed the toy and made all the colors match in only a few seconds. He dropped the toy and blanked as he felt a sense of utter defeat wash over him.

For the next hour, he continued to grab a toy and push it into her hands as he held a similar one in his hands. He continued this one-sided competition in hope that he would best the new girl at something. But everything he did proved useless at the hands of that little girl.

Building train sets, she somehow made a loopty-loop out of straight tracks.

Shoving the collapsible points in a twelve sided multidimensional die, she did that in an instant.

But the worst defeat of all was in several seconds she did the hardest puzzle book that he had ever encountered.

She found Waldo!


The boy laid on his hands and knees in defeat in front of the new girl. A cloud of utter despair rain down on his head. "Y-you win. I can't win just yet. B-but g-give me time, I'll win I swear!" He looked up at the empty glare the girl was giving him. "W-what?"

"Why are you trying? What is the point of you testing yourself against me? There is no point for you and I to be having this pathetic competition. It is meaningless."

"Wow, you're a really grumpy girl, you know that. You are so young but you complain like an old lady. You're like my mom. Nothing is meaningless. We're just having some fun and you have to make it all sad."

The girl grew irritated and angry at the little boy in front of her as he twirled around and looked at all the toys around him. "Then why am I here? If nothing is meaningless and were having 'fun', then tell me why I am here?"

The boy stopped his whirling as his hoodie shifted and fell from his head. The shadow covering his eyes disappeared as it revealed blond hair and solid blue eyes looking at her. "Well, despite you being all mean and gloomy, you made this a lot more fun. So, I think you were born to make things better for people. You know, make them happy. I mean" he smiled at the girl who was becoming less disheartened as he continued "we just met, but I think we are going to be great friends." The girl lost the frown on her face as it was replaced with a straight line. "But" she looked up to see him point at her with a cocky smile "don't think that just because you could do all this that you are better than me. I'll show you that I can beat you at something, and then you will have to acknowledge that I'm the best, got it." He said as he changed his finger into an open hand to shake.

The girl looked at the hand with slight confusion until she gained a small smile and shook his hand.

"By the way, what's your name?"

"Medaka. Medaka Kurokami."

"Hi Medaka. I'm Naruto Hitoyoshi. Remember that okay, because that name is a name you will never forget okay." He turned back around and started to work on any other puzzle he could find. The girl contemplated something as she watched him mess with the toys. She felt a new sense of hope and accomplishments envelop her for the first time in her life. A friend that wasn't terrified or scared of her ability. She felt like she couldn't find the right words to express this new hope, so she worked with what she could think of.

"Naruto... Please... Please marry me!"

"Are you crazy? No way."

Crushed would be the best term to describe her expectations.



With the new year, comes new stories and ideas. Three new fics along with Hunter could be made if I get the right motivation. And more on the way.

This is just an idea I had about the Medakaverse with Naruto as her best friend. As someone who doesn't put her on a pedestal but tries to be beside and best her at what she does. So she doesn't have to feel alone in that concept. That doesn't mean that Naruto will be perfect like Medaka, but that does mean that he will do his best and not just leave everything to her.

Also, this is a perfect chance to utilize multiple characters from Naruto as Abnormals and Minuses. The only hard thing I have to think through is the idea about whether I want these abilities to be natural (Pluses) or gained through deterioration (Minuses). But if it was a minus, I may have some ideas *COUGH COUGH* Sauske and Gaara *COUGH SARCASTIC PLAYED COUGH*.

Anyway, here is to a hopeful new series. And the Kurama and Anshin'in-San thing won't be totally explained for some time. So just keep vigilant, Kay. Also, just like my other stories, I'll put Omakes and other things in later. But as far as Lemons go, that is up to you guys on when you want to see them.


Thank You