Dugan vs. King

There was something about waking up the morning after my confession that made me understand how people can get split personalities. When I opened my eyes I saw Chris sleeping next to me. For my first one million thoughts, he was the only thing on my mind.

But thought one-million-and-one put that dreamy persona in check; tied it up and kept it quiet. For Sean Dugan, being in love with Chris meant walking towards the life he'd always wanted. For Kaldrick, it meant walking away from everything he'd ever known. Sure it would've been great if love was the only thing that mattered, but for Kal it just wasn't. There was still the streets, the music, the block, the hood, the fans, the groupies, the money, the talk, the haters. In Kaldrick King's world, there was a long list of things that were just as consuming as love.

So it was Dugan vs. King: split personalities. Two people, one body, and two separate lives.

"Hey," Chris always talked soft in the morning when he was just waking up. In a minute he would panic, and worry that he was late for a meeting with a client or a judge. Then I'd tell him it was Saturday, the only day his alarm clock didn't wake him up, and he'd ask me if I was sure.

"Are you sure?" he asked right on time, rubbing his fists over his eyes.

"It doesn't take a law degree to know what day it is, Sleepy. Where'd you graduate from again?"

"You try working seventy hours a week, and then coming home to get worked every night and see how you do remembering!" he smiled in a shy way. If he coulda blushed he woulda been red.

I put my forehead against his, and grinned as I thought of everything we'd done the night before, "You mine as well get used to that. Or you could quit your second job."

"Second job?"

"Yeah, you can quit this lawyer thing whenever - move up to full time here. Hard work. Long hours. Great benefits…"

He rolled his eyes at me and shook his head, but he couldn't stop himself from laughing, "Oh, so you're my boss now, huh?"

"You were the one who said you were gettin' worked," I winked at him, "…you did get worked."

"Whatever!" he laughed harder and made a face as he twisted beneath me so that we would fit together better.

Being close to him felt so good, but while Sean Dugan had been working his slow game, Kaldrick King had been clawing to get back in control. It was time to get back to the other things that mattered; the streets, music, block, hood, fans, groupies, money, talk, haters. It was time to find out what effect his confessions had had on the world.

I kissed Chris' forehead as an apology for getting out of bed.

"You're checking it, aren't you?"

I put shorts and a wifey on before I slouched down into the chair on the other side of the room and picked up my phone, "Yeah. I wanna know."

"You could not look," he said calmly, his lawyer poker face on. I saw through it. He was desperate for Sean Dugan, "You could come back to bed."

But Kaldrick King, The King of California, was the one in control, "It's time," I said as I pulled up my website, "I can't ignore whatever's on here. I'm gettin' back in the booth tonight - To thank everyone who stands behind me, and destroy anyone who doesn't."

He nodded. He knew: when I got in this mode, Sean was just a figment of Kal's imagination.

A big part of me that regretted that. Sean Dugan didn't want anything but Chris, and if he'd been my only personality, I would've stayed in bed with the man I loved. Instead I was getting ready to go to war to protect the alter-ego I'd built. And I knew it might be a fight to the death.

Because whatever war I waged outside, it was the war inside that mattered most. Once upon a time, Kaldrick King's most prized possessions had cost Sean Dugan the love of his life. So far, there was concrete proof that Sean and Kal could not exist without one destroying the other.

Two personalities; one fight; and one final destiny.