This is a new story I'm writing. This story is about Katniss' thoughts on Peeta's feelings for her. The guilt that overtakes her every now and then. Please enjoy it and make sure you review. DISCLAIMER : I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING HUNGER GAMES RELATED.
DISCLAIMER : I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING HUNGER GAMES RELATED.
CHAPTER ONE: FRIENDS
"No one cares Effie!"
I look around the table and see the dumbfounded faces and I feel the need to defend myself. I mean, even Haymitch is giving me a weird look.
"Well, no one does." I continue and make my way outside of the train and walk down the railway until I think I've gone long enough, and I sit down.
In a matter of minutes I can hear someone walking to me. Probably Haymitch, I really don't want him lecturing me while I'm stressed out like this.
"Go away!" I yell sternly without looking back.
"I'm sorry." Once I recognize his voice I whip my head around and find Peeta just 2 meters away from me.
"I'll leave you to it then." He says and starts to turn away.
"Wait!" Me saying this actually caught me by surprise because I'm calling him back when I want to be alone.
"Don't go. You- you can stay." I mutter.
I watch him make his way and sit down next to me.
"It would be easy you know, to just run down those tracks, disappear and be free. But then you think again, maybe it's not easy as you think. Especially in the world we live in today." Peeta starts talking and I listen attentively whilst looking at the train tracks in front of me.
"You know what's weird, I'm ready to die for you and I don't even know your favorite color."
I find myself smiling when he says this and I turn my head to look at him, his blue eyes staring at me in adoration and I can't ignore the guilt that runs through me.
How can Peeta even like someone like me? It hurts me to think I'm hurting him everytime I make him feel like we will never be together, everytime I never consider his feelings for me and everytime I push him away when all he wants Is to stay. I shake the thought away and smile more widely at him.
"Green." I say, "And yours?"
"Orange? Like Effie's hair?" I ask in disgust.
He chuckles and continues, "No, much more dimmer. Like the sunset."
I smile at him and turn back to looking at the railway.
I'm taken aback by his apology because last time I checked, he doesn't have anything to apologize for.
"For what?" I ask in confusion.
"For the time when I got mad at you back at the train. The last train I mean. I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have reacted because you were just doing it to protect us and take us home safely. I'm sorry Katniss, I really am. Please forgive me."
"Peeta, you have nothing to apologize for. You did nothing wrong. You were clueless."
We stay silent for a while until Peeta decides to speak up again.
"Katniss, because were going to be pretending the whole time. I need to at least know that a part of this has to be real. So, can we be friends."
I look at Peeta to see if he's serious. He has a point, if our relationship is fake. I don't want our friendship to be fake too.
"I thought we already were." I say with a small smile and I smile even wider because Peeta looks like a little boy who just got a brand new toy. He looks so happy, like nothing could hurt him. For a second I forget about Snow's threat but his snake-like voice brings a frown in my face again.
I look away from Peeta and I can tell his smile drops as well.
"Why don't we go inside, I have something I want to show you." He says and gets up. I look up at him and he put his hand out. I grab onto it and he helps me stand up.
It feels nice to have my hands intertwined with Peeta. Because it feels real, now that we've confirmed that our friendship is real.
Peeta tells me that I should go back and apologize to Effie first of. Effie understands and apologizes as well for making things much more stressful.
"Why don't you and Peeta just go and have fun together " Effie says after her apology.
As I turn Effie stops me again, "But Katniss, not too much fun."
I quickly turn away to hide my blush and start walking towards Peeta who is waiting down the hallway.
"What did she say?"
"She said it was okay, she apologized too." I reply.
"OK." He takes my hand again and lead us down the hallway to a compartment further down the back. When we reach the door he stops at the doorknob.
"What's wrong?" I ask him.
"Oh, nothing." I don't believe him for a second, but he looks fine to me. 
He opens the door and lets me go in first. I freeze instantly and look around. There are paintings everywhere, every side and every corner. I don't like what I'm looking at though.
The arena. The cornucopia. The berries. The Hunger Games. Mutts. Blood.
I look around again, everything is scary. Like my nightmares. Is this what Peeta sees?
I realize something else, I'm in almost every painting. Me in the cave, in the trees and the lake. I'm basically everywhere.
"What do you think?" Peeta says behind me.
"I hate it," I mutter.
"I mean, they're beautiful but...all I want to do is just forget about it."
"I know, but they haunt me everywhere I go. Painting them and putting them out there seem to help me a bit." He says behind.
"How can you perfectly put every detail in every right way?" I say.
"Well Katniss, you're not the only one that has nightmares around here." He says and I turn around to look back at him.
"But I'm in most of these, am I part of your nightmares Peeta?"
"It's a nightmare when l keep-" He stops.
"It's okay." I say, "You don't have to continue."
After that I tell Peeta that I'm going to go back to my compartment. He stops me and asks if he can come.
"And what are you going to do there?" I say.
"Please Katniss, I don't want to stay out here. I have nothing to do." He begs.
I can't say no to him. As much as I don't like him following me, I just can't say no to him.
We reach my room in a couple of minutes.
"I'm going to go take a shower. Just do what ever you want to do." I say and I find myself looking at his eyes. He doesn't look good, he doesn't look like his been sleeping either. He has bags under his eyes.
I take a warm shower and change inside the bathroom. I braid my hair and get out of the bathroom to find Peeta lying on my bed.
I small smile makes it way to my lips and I move to the side of the bed. He's lying on his back with his hands on his stomach, breathing evenly.
His shoes are still on so I slowly take them off, making sure I don't wake him. When I take his shoes off he moves and murmurs something.
"Katniss," He mutters quietly. Like a whisper.
"Don't leave...me...please." He continues and I move up closer to where he lays his head.
I slowly push the hair around his forehead back. He mumbles something again.
"Shhhhh..." I say.
After a while I make my way out of my room and decide to have a drink. I sit down next to a window and watch the view outside. I can see nothing really, just grass and trees.
I'm so lost in thought that I don't hear Effie coming in. It's not until she yells my name and jump that I accept her presence.
"Where's Peeta?" She asks brightly and takes a seat in front of me.
"Asleep," I answer.
"But I just checked his room, he's not there."
"In my room." I confirm.
"Oh." She says and continues sipping her tea.
Octavia decides to join us a few minutes later.
"Isn't Peeta with you?" Octavia asks.
"No, sadly he's not. He's asleep, he's very tired." I answer.
"But he's room is emp-" She starts but I interrupt.
"In my room."
Effie and Octavia starts a conversation about District 11, our first stop. But its torture listening to their conversation because everytime they mention flowers and berries I think of Rue and I feel my heart breaking a little.
When Cinna calls for dinner, I thank him quietly and make my way to the dinner table.
"Where's Peeta?" Haymitch asks when I take a seat. Before I can answer Ocatavia does it for me.
"He's asleep in Katniss' room."
We eat dinner quietly.
"Katniss maybe you should bring some food to Peeta when he wakes up." Effie suggests.
"He should just get some when he wakes up." I say and shrug.
"But Katniss that wouldn't make a nice girlfriend now would it." Fulvia says and Haymitch coughs.
Oh right. That. Pretending. Convincing. I almost forgot.
I smile, "Maybe I should."
An avox hands me a plate and a tray and I put as much food as I can for him.
"You should get ready to sleep now too, we might reach 11 around the afternoon tomorrow. We must be on schedule and I cannot afford you and Peeta waking up late." Effie says in a serious voice.
I make my way to my room and Peeta still lies there, sleeping soundly. Should I wake him?
I set the tray on the bedside table and slowly shake him awake.
He mumbles before he opens his eyes. He sits up quickly when he realizes that his sleeping in my room. His hair all messed up and it looks better that way. Brings back the 11 year old I saw once before.
"Peeta, I bought you some food." I say and place the tray in his lap. I feel like were back in the cave. Where he had a serious injury on his leg and with me having to take care of him.
"Thanks." He says with a smile.
I sit on the edge of the bed and watch him eat. He eats like there's no tomorrow.
He catches me watching him eat and he smiles in embarrassment. This time he eats a bit more slowly.
When he finishes eating I volunteer to take the tray back to the kitchen.
"You're shoes are beside the bed by the way, you should go back to your room because Effie will be wanting us to wake up early tomorrow. Even though we don't reach 11 by the afternoon." I tell him before I get out of the room, he simply answers with a nod and I walk off.
When I go back to my room, its empty.
The bed ready to be slept in, Peeta nowhere to be found.
I get ready for bed and lie down. I lay on the pillow and smell the familiar scent of cinammon.
I sleep to the scent that Peeta left behind and later wake up from a nightmare filled with mutts, Rue and my family.
If I get enough reviews I'll surely continue.RestlessIdeas