Oh bank holiday, how I have waited for your appearance.
I feel so…so naughty staying up late on a Sunday night XD
I get so sidetracked with school nowadays I cant even help it. je suis desole ;') I had my drama exam only a few days ago and before that I had all my weekends barricaded in school rehearsing. If anyone knows 'A Midsummer Night's Dream' then you'll know the lovely woman Helena, Jesus Christ shoot me now. Most of my time on stage I'm on my knees begging like a dog for Demetrius to love me... the girl is a mess.
I got my Chemistry GCSE result - I don't even know how my brain spewed out enough facts to get an A but you won't see me complaining ;)
I'm starting to want to write a Fleur-Hermione story, they got the mate thing that I love so well going on in the Magic Universe, but this story is going too slow as it is Haha. Maybe in the summer... *looks dramatically into the distance*
Replies now, skip to non-bold writing for story.
TaMmYViXeN19: NO! Please don't blush! You made me embarrassed when I first read it x) I have to re-read through my chapters and reading that back made me cringe Haha. I like where it is going I think, the plot is there (sort of) but it's going pretty slowly. And yes, they definitely will do, loves the drama! That sounds beautiful. Wait what, eats…rotting flesh? No I didn't know that XD Learn something new everyday though… It doesn't matter if your picture portrays what you want people to see, what matters is that the audience can relate to the work in their own way :P yeah me too, he's working so hard! Keep me company? Giggles Yeah I always feel like that, nearly at the end of every chapter. I don't know if it's because I want to continue with the story, or rather I'm afraid to write every detail I want to incase I bore everyone? I don't really know… IM SORRY I TOOK SO LONG! :o Fish! Japanese names 3
CullenCrazy1918: You actually have no idea how long it took me to think up the names, as basic as they are, its pretty shameful Haha. I just find Latin so much more romantic than English I guess, something like that anyway ;) Thank you so much! I'm glad you get excited! I get excited when I post them to be honest ^^ Haha read on my friend, you shall soon find out~
CountingNumbers: When I read your review I actually blinked really slowly and I found it wasn't possible. Try it! NOW! Haha I just can't seem to do it xD I didn't even realize it had been another month to this chapter, time just flies by when at High school :p Jesus I think this chapter may confuse you, hope not, but it might. Haha see how it goes? Slowly everything will become clear (ish) ;)
Apocalyptic-Wasp: Bitch, hug me now. Possessive Alice should be a way of life I swear, Haha xD Anyway, thank you so much and welcome to my story, I'm happy you decided to click on my title :P
deadlyXivy: I took Latin at my High School too! But only for a couple of years, nowhere near enough to be fluent. The teachers said something like Latin is hard to speak with, you can only really write it or read it, something with all the tenses and conjunctions or something? Sidetracking much :P Thank you for reading my story so far! I try not to make it follow any plot I have read before, I know what it's like to read story after story with the same plot line. Don't get me wrong, the intimacy in this story is sort of key, but won't be ridden in every single chapter. I love writing chapters where that's the case (Alice and Bella at each others throats) I find it much easier to write
Thanks to everyone else for the support!
This chapter is (slightly) darker than the past ones. Only mildly, wondering if I should follow it.
For the rest of the day Alice and I rested in her room and relaxed, it was truly nice and I felt as content as I could ever possibly feel after everything that had happened. We spent our time talking, mainly me asking her more and more questions. I wanted to know everything about her, and with every answer she gave me two more questions would be fired back at her. Eventually I couldn't think of anything more to ask her and we ended up tangled together, just enjoying each other's hold. Alice cooked me lunch and diner, claiming she loved to see 'her little human' enjoying something she had made. Her food was great; she could cook for me any day.
That evening was spent on the sofa of the living room, cuddled together and watching movies. Alice's high purring and stroking of my head made me fall in and out of sleep multiple times. It was around midnight when I jolted to life with the motion of flying, only to realize Alice was carrying me back to her bed. In the darkness and silence of the house, I was reminded of when Alice carried me to my home before. Her bright piercing eyes contrasting perfectly with the dark. She looked down at me but didn't say anything, an analyzing look on her face, before she looked up and kicked her bedroom door gently open and floated us over to her bed. She laid me down on the soft duvet and placed a gentle kiss on my lips, I was too tired to respond and she seemed to respect that. She backed away and just stood at the end of the bed, a black shadow in a black room apart from her blazing eyes. I saw another shadow float into the room and meet with Alice, where they seemed to debate about something. Whatever had been said fell on death ears. I felt my eyes start to close on their own again and didn't fight it. I faintly heard the closing of the bedroom door before sleep swiftly consumed me. I never felt the dip on the other side of the bed that night.
I didn't wake up to Alice's purring either.
I didn't wake up to Alice at all.
Instead I woke up to an empty bed, in an empty room, in what seemed to be an empty house. I didn't know for sure though, vampires sure seemed to be quiet when they wanted to be. I got out of bed around ten minutes later, hearing the light thud of the book hit the floor as I headed to the bathroom. Esme had kindly set out some new clothes I guess she had bought for me by the sink. After washing and dressing in clothes that didn't squeeze my stomach out of my mouth, I went downstairs.
No one was there either.
I decided to make use of myself and made breakfast. I wanted to make a breakfast for two to surprise Alice, almost forgetting she didn't eat. I mentally slapped myself and settled with making just bacon and eggs. Food tasted good, but tasted great by Alice. And any food tasted shit when you were by yourself.
"For fuck's sake." I grumbled, fed up. I could feel my mood become slowly more and more sour as more time without Alice passed by. "Where the hell is she..."
Then it clicked, somewhere in the air that occupied majority of my head my memory decided to wake up. Carlisle wanted to work with me today, see how far I could take myself before-
Before what? Destroying his office and scaring everyone again? Great.
I don't want to fall asleep for almost a week again though, less time with Alice. But it didn't seem like I had a choice, after reading what little I did of that book yesterday I was intrigued. The brief account of the vampire-human relationship made me incredibly nervous and almost shut the book right there and then, I hope to hell that nothing like that will happen to us, it sounded horrible and tragic. And what the fuck was up with the stages anyway? I didn't want to hate Alice, ever. And for two fucking years? What the hell was that? But it did make sense, Alice and I had already been at each other's throat multiple times, and that's what the first stage claimed to be. I just hope it won't be for as long as three years, I just want to skip to the pure love part. Be all lovey-dovey with Alice and everything fine and Dandy.
I cleared my plate in the sink and tidied my mess before heading through the huge house to Carlisle's office for the umpteenth time. It vaguely registered to me that outside Emmett's and Rosalie's room I never heard anything, which I was somewhat grateful for but also put me on edge. If everyone was out of the house then it was only Carlisle and I. He was serious about getting Alice away.
When I reached his office I burst straight in and was relieved to see the man at his desk, sitting there appearing to be waiting for me. He had cleaned himself up, new clothes, washed, and he genuinely looked less tired than he had yesterday. His eyes were locked on me and he had a dead serious expression on his face, which sent a sporadic shiver down my back. His hands were clasped and resting on the table, his eyes bright gold burned into me for what seemed like forever before they briefly flitted to the chair opposite his desk then back to me. I took the hint, and tentatively moved over to the chair. "What's wrong Carlisle?" My voice came out weak and quivering, I didn't even know why. Whatever was happening, or was about to happen, didn't seem good.
"Sit down Bella." Er, I already was, but Carlisle's voice sounded way too commanding and grim for me to comeback to. I waited for him to say something more, but it never seemed to come. I cleared my throat, hoping to rid of the croakiness it had before.
"Erm, where is everyone?" That would have to do for now. Carlisle didn't speak straight away, but his tight expression had seemed to have disappeared. He no longer had a frown or furrowed eyebrows, instead replaced with a fairly blank one. I didn't know which was worse; at least I knew what his mood was before. Carlisle sighed, catching my attention, and his gaze broke for the first time today as he looked down, shaking his head. He ran a hand through his now clean hair before looking back up.
"I don't know how to tell you this Bella..." His expression became apologetic, his eyes pleading; as if he didn't want to tell me and hoped that I would... catch on...
I knew straight away. It had to do with Alice, I hadn't seen her this morning and it didn't seem likely that she was with Esme if she had left last night. She had left and never come back.
Carlisle seemed to find what he was looking for. "Bella. I'm sorry; Esme and the others are out looking for her. Edward's a good tracker, but her scent is faint as if she had left a while ago and..."
Carlisle's voice faded out and was replaced with a dull thudding, my own heartbeat? I didn't know nor did I care. Alice was gone. Carlisle's mouth was moving faster and faster, his eyes becoming wider, but I didn't hear him. I couldn't. She was gone. It was almost as if I had temporarily become deaf or the world was on mute, my senses were slowly leaving me. Everything was leaving me. I saw Carlisle stand up swiftly, and thought nothing of it as he grabbed my limp arms and tied them around the chair, the same with my legs. What was he doing?
"Where is she Carlisle?" I couldn't hear my own voice, but I knew I had said it. All I could hear was my heartbeat, slowly becoming faster and louder until it was giving me a migraine. With each beat of my heart, waves of pain would wash through me, becoming more powerful and sinister each time. I don't know if I screamed, I couldn't hear myself, but I felt a tight burning in my throat. I tried lifting my hands to clamp down around my throbbing head, then my burning neck, anything to stop this agony, but they wouldn't move. I wanted to curl up in a ball to try and suppress the pain, but my legs were tied. I felt myself start to thrash around trying to break free, but I was too weak. Why was I too weak? Where was Alice? Why had she left?
I saw Carlisle's hands pressed against my shoulders but I didn't feel them. He lowered himself to my eye level and looked at me closely, almost analyzing me. Would he leave me too? Why was everything leaving me? His lips started moving again, forming into words that I couldn't understand without sound. He might as well be speaking a different language. I focused solely on his lips, trying to read what he was saying.
'She... is... gone...'
I can't take it.
My head felt like it was about to explode with the pain and I managed to shake Carlisle's hands off me, they almost burned. My sight started fluctuating between normal and high definition and I knew what was coming. I needed to get out of here; I needed to get out of this fucking chair! I needed to find her. I felt it probing around my chest and slowly working up to my head, the heat that I knew. As much as I hated what this had done so far, I knew it would be the only way I could get out of this chair, to find Alice. My mate that had run away.
So I welcomed it.
It acted almost like a person, the power swelled and moved through and around me. It moved faster knowing I wouldn't resist it, it took relish in my venerability and worked with a vengeance. It swirled and moved through me like a drug, making my senses confused but clearer at the same time. It felt darker than before, and more powerful, as if before I hadn't witnessed the full extent of it. My thoughts turned darker and more menacing, but it felt right, natural. I wasn't being controlled, this was my own free will, and I wanted this. I felt the pounding in my brain cease abruptly, replaced with the burning that I had come to know like an old friend. I felt myself smirk, knowing it wouldn't be long till I would be ready. This darker power was new, and I wanted to wait till it had thrived to its maximum capability.
I felt myself being consumed, and greeted the darkness.
Sounds attacked my ears as my hearing came back to me. Colors invaded my vision then rearranged themselves into shapes and then objects with infinite detail. I looked down at my bound hands, my skin a deathly white color and I felt myself grin. Perfect.
"I don't want your sympathy Carlisle." My voice unlike before, sounded almost evil. I looked up, catching the man like a deer in headlights. He jumped back, appearing like he was trying to sneak forward. Pathetic if he thought he could now. His eyes widened when he took in my appearance, I guess my eyes were silver again. I hoped they were, just something else to throw off the doctor with.
It was then that I was hit with the huge wave of arousal, I had almost forgotten about it last time. I wanted to trick Carlisle by remaining calm but I couldn't help myself thrashing around madly. My eyes rolled into the back of my head and my mouth hung open, panting. I tried crossing my legs but couldn't, they were still bound. I needed someone to ease this ache. I needed my Mate. Fuck, it's killing me! I heard myself draw out a moan deeply; turning into a growl at the end that still seemed to sound remotely beautiful. I need her, my mate. Where is she? Alice, I want her now!
"What do you mean Bella?" His voice cut mine own off, he sounded closer. I snapped my eyes open and focused on him, my mind calculating his distance on its own.
I would have felt anger for this man for having tied me without my consent, but with this power and darkness consuming me, and the need to find Alice, all I felt was pure hatred. It grew in me with my need to find her, and this man was stopping me. He was standing in my way. I stopped my thrashing, willing the burning arousal away and focused my glare directly into his eyes.
"Let. Me. Out."
Carlisle's expression turned conflicted, he didn't know what to do.
He never knew what to do.
"Bella I don't think that's a good-"
"I NEED TO FIND MY MATE!" I screamed and surged forward, the force breaking whatever was holding my arms and legs down like a sheet of paper. My right hand opened and met the wall, Carlisle's neck in between my icy cold fingers. His eyes widened and he yelled, his hands coming up trying to pry my hand away from his neck. My hand wouldn't budge, it only tightened and cracks started forming in his skin, he was too weak. I cocked my head and leaned in close to his face, my voice coming out low between the constant rumbling in my chest. "You're weak, you are all too weak. You can't find her and you dare stop me?" My voice became louder as I became lost in my own rage. "You dare take away my mate from me? What is stopping me from doing the same to you hmm? I should do the same, see how you like it." I felt my lips pull back as I roared at his face. He looked terrified. Good. I squeezed his neck tighter before surging my arm to the right, chucking the man into the wall of his office, where he collapsed to the floor coughing and grasping at his slowly healing neck. He looked up at me with nothing but fear and I couldn't help the gleeful smile that pulled at my lips.
"Bella...stop. Alice...she is-"
"ENOUGH!" I yelled. Silence. Nothing made a sound, as if everything outside as well had heard me and obeyed. I looked out of the window briefly, my eyes scanning and analyzing the surroundings. "Carlisle. You are supposedly a smart man." I looked down at him; he was staring at me from the floor, making me feel powerful, above him. Perfect. "You should then know when not to cross me." A noise came from him that I didn't recognize, either way it sounded small and weak and I smirked. "It's a shame that anything would come to harm Esme..." He stiffened, nerve hit. Continue. I moved closer, soundlessly. "But if you so much as think about keeping me from my mate again." I took one steep closer, only a few feet away and I leered forward. "I will have a choice... but I will still kill her."
Carlisle whimpered but remained on the floor. "She's fine Bella..."
"Shut up, fool. You said she was gone, don't lie to me!" I moved forward, ready to do something unforgivable but stopped when he flinched. I had wasted enough time on him already, I needed to find Alice.
With speed I didn't know I had, I ran.
Out office. Down stairs. Through corridor. Down stairs. To door. No time. Through door. Outside. Inhale. Mate. Alice. 109 miles. East. Run.
I acted on pure instinct, letting the power and burning guide my body. Trees blurred past me in a sea of green, even with my enhanced sight they merged together into something unidentifiable. I ran through more trees than I dodged, uncaring. They were in the way, they would be destroyed. I blazed my path in a dead straight line, following her scent like a bloodhound. Wave after wave of power surged through me, willing me on like a running partner, it felt like a part of me now but also like another person, but we had come together to claim what was ours. We needed to find Alice and-
And then what?
She was the one that had left in the first place, right? I shook my head, trying to free myself from that thought, but they came flooding back. They taunted me, teased me and spat at me, making me angry and roar again as I punched a passing tree with unending power and speed, immediately pulverizing it and sending a cracking boom through the dense forest. Birds flew from trees, animals cried in fear but nothing seemed to please my new sadistic nature. My mate.
She had left me.
I knew I wasn't perfect, far from it. Had she finally realized it for herself? Did she finally realize how much better she could do?
She could have at least told me.
Bella? Can you hear me?
I snarled at the sound of her angelic voice sounding through my head. I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want her excuses, but I wanted to find her, know she was safe. Then fuck her. Screw her over. Make her pay.
Listen to me, I'm fine. Carlisle rang-
"SHUT UP!" I screamed, clasping my hands to my ears trying to block her voice out. My legs pounded harder, unrelenting against the forest floor. Anything that stood in my way was demolished. Trees, boulders, animals alike. They were worthless. I saw a lake come into view and vaulted the whole one hundred meters without blinking an eye. I relished the breeze that whipped against my face, bringing with it the scent of Alice. Fifty-eight miles. Not long.
Bella stop it, you'll hurt yourself. I'm fine!
By now I had blocked out her voice, my own in a constant growl or hiss with the vague sting when I punched an offending tree. I jumped higher and further each time, inhaling in her scent, calculating where she was. Soon more scents started invading my head, Alice wasn't alone, she was with the others. Why was she with the others? Why didn't they bring her back to me? Are they keeping her from me?
I could also smell Carlisle faintly as he tried in vain to catch up to me.
…I had warned him.
I focused on the scents again as I soared through the air, defining then separating each one individually. Mate. Three boys. One Girl. Esme
Sound and surrounding seemed to fade away again as I thought of what I would do to her if Carlisle dared stop me again. A part of me felt a rush of adrenaline at the thought of payback, of causing pain and sorrow. Another part, a weak, much weaker part objected to doing anything to the caring woman that acted so much like a Mother to me. I had agreed to myself and Carlisle that I wouldn't do anything to her as long as he didn't cross me again. The part that wanted to cause hurt objected unhappily with how weak I was, but accepted it anyway and focused on the task at hand.
Her scent was becoming much stronger now, only ten miles to go. I couldn't see them but I knew that the others were surrounding her, cutting me off from her, protecting her. It made my dark half unhappy, it made me unhappy. I should be the one with her, protecting her, she is mine! Maybe she hadn't left. Yes. They had taken her, taken her from me. What were they thinking, taking Alice from me.
They will regret it.
I came into the clearing they were situated at with a thundering roar, sending birds from miles around flying into the air. There they were, standing in an arrow shape with Esme the closest, at the very point. They were obscuring my view of my mate, my heart started to beat faster as blood pumped through my body as well as anger and hatred and raw power. It concentrated around my calves and I crouch down instinctively, glaring right at Esme.
"Where is she? GIVE HER TO ME!" I bellowed, unmoving, but my hands clawed at the ground leaving claw marks. Dirt collected under my nails as I familiarized myself quickly with the Earth. Damp soil, but firm. Good grip.
They all stiffened when I had crouched down, Rosalie and Edward on either side of Esme lowering slightly but straightened again when Esme sent them a look. What were they doing? Not preparing to fight, do they think so lowly of me that I won't even be able to reach them? They still looked uncomfortable and wary, which I was glad I could make them feel, even in their numbers. Weak.
Esme took a step forward with her hands in the air, a sad look on her face. "Bella, calm down. You have to listen to me-"
"I don't have to listen to anyone! You took her from me! Where is she? Give her back!" My shouting was making my throat hurt, but only made my voice sound more menacing, so I didn't care. Esme took another step forward and I caught a glimpse of my mate's skinny jeans. "Alice!" I cried. The body stiffened and my sight of her was taken again when Esme stepped back. I punched the ground in anger and growled, my fist leaving a huge dig out as dirt flew around me. The others flinch at the display of power.
"Bella. Calm down, now. I don't want to have to make anyone fight you." Esme commanded, but it sounded more like a plea. Her eyes looked desperate, she looked truly unhappy. I smirked before snarling at her.
"I know what you're trying to do! I know he's following me, don't waste my time! Give her to me! Alice!" I ended up with tears in my eyes, all I wanted was my Alice.
Esme sighed before stepping aside; the others looked at her incredulously at tried to move in but backed away also when she glared at them all.
She smelt so good.
It felt like forever since I had last seen her and I catapulted myself through the air at her without a second thought, landing a few feet away. I ignored the gasps and the confusing look on her face before grabbing a fistful of her gorgeous hair tightly and yanking her mouth to mine. We both moaned at contact and I wasted no time in shoving my tongue into her mouth and owning her. I moved one leg in-between hers and pressed hard, whilst my hands went straight to her breasts. She groaned sensually but then pulled away, I stepped towards her again but she pushed me away.
"Bella stop, you need to calm down."
I growled. "They took you from me… and you expect me to be calm?" I moved forward again but she jumped away. By now I'd had enough, and jumped towards her, tackling her to the floor. She struggled but I clasped her hands in mine and shoved them above her head, straddling her and pushing down. Looking down at her she had an angry look in her eyes that I loved to see. My arousal returned and spiked and I started grinding against her and moaning deeply, lowering myself down to just above her lips. Inhaling that enrapturing scent that sent my eyes rolling, I felt any trace of control start to slip out of my grasp.
"Tell them, if they take you from me again, I'll kill them all." Alice shuddered, and I pushed my mouth to hers, slipping my tongue in easily and exploring her mouth freely this time. Alice responded gladly for a moment before she started struggling again. I growled into the kiss and tightened my grip until she started whimpering. I bit down on her down on her tongue. Silencing her. She went limp after that, which only annoyed me more. I pulled back and looked down at her. She was looking at me blankly, much like Carlisle had before and I felt my lip pull back as I snarled quietly. Still she didn't move.
I lurched forward into her neck, taking a lungful of mouthwatering goodness that was Alice. I felt the burning at the back of my throat return, like a thirst after a marathon, calling to me to be quenched. I suddenly felt dehydrated. I opened my mouth, kissing her neck lightly before running my tongue along her porcelain skin. She was squirming and talking, but I couldn't hear her, her voice was being drowned out by one in my own head. Telling to bite. I obeyed willingly and licked one last time up the expanse of her neck, before opening my mouth wider. I couldn't wait to taste her.
But before I could I was pulled off with two strong hands and flung far away. I collided with the floor, not thinking about my landing, and flipping and rolling in a mass of uncontrolled limbs. I came finally to a stop when my back collided with a tree and I cried out in pain. The force wasn't enough to break the tree, which was the worst, bark digging and cutting into my skin.
"Don't hurt my sister!" The voice came from the other girl. Rosalie. I growled remembering how she had treated me at school. In a flash I was rushing towards her. How dare she. She wasn't prepared for when my fist connected with her stomach and sent her flying the opposite direction. I grinned and didn't wait for her to land, following her as she flew through the air. I heard the sound of the others following but ignored them, this one would pay. Rosalie coughed loudly as she finally crashed through a tree and hit a boulder behind it, but immediately got up. She glared at me through her now messed up hair with killer eyes that sent adrenaline and power surging through me. I needed a fight.
I needed to kill.
"You don't know what you just did." Rosalie growled, whipping her hair back and snapping her knuckles. "You don't know how much I've needed a reason to punch you."
I smirked, she wouldn't win. She couldn't win. I needed to protect Alice, and if killing one of her family members –one of my family members- was the way, then so be it. I crouched down again, twisted my neck till it cracked, and then the other way, keeping eye contact the whole time. I watched as her muscles tightened in her legs, she was ready. "Die." I sneered before we both launched towards each other.
We connected halfway with such a force we made clashing sound similar to thunder. Claws and teeth mauling each other as much as we could before the other arrived. Snarls and hisses bellowed out of each other's throats and ripped through the forest. It hurt, so much. But I couldn't stop. It was fantastic, fighting. The feeling of cracking your fist against someone's face what blissful, the thought of fighting for your life so exhilarating I didn't want it to end. Each time a fist landed on the blonde a rush of adrenaline swarmed through me, willing me to do it again. Each time she cried out in pain or hissed in frustration, I shuddered. Almost aroused at how powerful I was. Power hungry. She couldn't beat me.
I could smell Alice nearing; I didn't want to hurt her so I tried moving the fight away, becoming more offensive in technique. If she tried breaking us up and I ended up hurting her I wouldn't forgive myself. Rosalie wouldn't move though, whenever I tried flinging her away or pushing her back she'd only stand tall and fight back, throwing punches and snarling teeth whenever she could, a look in her eye that looked like she was enjoying herself.
Alice was too close.
This Childs play had to end.
"ENOUGH!" I yelled, freeing both hands from Rosalie's grip and grasping her throat with both of them. Lifting her into the air so she couldn't push off the ground. Her eyes went wide and she started gasping as my grip tightened. Little shards off her neck started appearing and flaking off, before more serious looking cracks started splitting across her pearly skin. I felt a grin pull at my lips. "You can't win. Leave me and Alice alone." I snarled. I felt the presence of the others slowly move in on me, even with my back to them. I could feel fear as well as confusion and anger roll off of Alice, I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to scare her.
I don't know what's right anymore.
I lowered my voice and squeezed again, making Rosalie cry out and Emmett and Esme whimper, though they didn't do anything. "Don't do this Rosalie. I-I don't know what's happening. I don't want to kill you." I lowered my head, everything slowly sinking in. What the hell was I doing? I couldn't kill her, she's Alice's sister! Esme's daughter! Emmett's mate…
I let go.
Rosalie sunk to the floor like a dead weight, grasping at her neck and I'm sure she had tears in her eyes. Emmett blazed over and fell to the floor with Rosalie, gathering her up in his strong arms and rocking her whilst whispering into her ear. I just stared down at them, blankly. I felt nothing.
What's happening to me?
All the anger seemed to dissipate with a farewell and was replaced with confusion and sorrow. I had almost killed Carlisle, I had almost killed Rosalie, I had almost bit Alice and I'm not even a vampire. I felt my knees give in and I crumpled to the floor, merely feet away from someone I had almost killed.
And there, I cried.
Like a baby.
I wailed, sobbed, rubbing my eyes till they were raw, kneeled over to hide my shame. I didn't want to face them, not after what I had done. How could I do anything to such a friendly family? I'm such a fuck up.
Vaguely I felt arms circle around my body as I was scooped up into Alice's arms, her scent quieting my body-wracking sobs into quiet whimpers and snivels. She picked me off the floor and spun me around, whispering sweet nothings in my ear trying to cheer me up. I couldn't help a watery giggle when she blew a raspberry in my ear lovingly.
I heard the sound of someone else enter the clearing and I cut myself off. I sniffed, taking in the smells around. It was the mix of books and his natural scent that made me recognize Carlisle straight away, I stiffened. Alice felt my insecurity and cuddled me tighter, shushing a whimper that escaped my throat. "Shhh, it's okay, calm down. He's forgiven you. Just listen to him." I nodded into her neck before pulling away and Alice lowered me to my wobbly feet. Rosalie and Emmett were now off to the side, Rosalie was looking away but Emmett was smiling at me and gave me a nod. Esme was walking towards Carlisle where she gave him a hug and a kiss, they spoke but I was too tired to listen in. My hearing and other enhancements I could feel slowly fade, as I started calming down. No one seemed to want to kill me. I looked down at my hands and saw the paleness fade away to my pinker, more natural skin color. I was surprised there were no cuts or bruises from how hard I had used them, I looked back over at Rosalie to see that she looked untouched too. Her neck fully healed.
"Bella, how are you feeling?" Carlisle's calm voice broke me away from Rosalie; I snapped my neck to meet his kind eyes. I could feel more tears start to swell at remembering how I had treated him. I quickly shifted my gaze to the floor.
"Better now…thanks." I mumbled, scuffing my foot against the forest floor. Only then did I realize that I was only wearing socks, and they were as good as gone. Idiot. "Look, Carlisle. I'm so sorry-"
"Don't worry about it Bella." Carlisle cut me off with a smile. "It was my fault for lying and provoking you. I'm just glad to see that you are all right. How's your heart rate?"
I lifted a shaky hand to my chest, not really knowing what was happening. The hard but slow and even rhythm of my heart greeted me as it beat away happily. "Erm, fairly normal I guess."
"Good." Carlisle nodded.
"Carlisle, what's happening?" I pleaded. I saw Esme give me a sympathetic look and felt Alice wrap an arm around my waist, her chin resting on my shoulder.
"It was an experiment." Carlisle spoke bluntly but gently, looking at me cautiously. Alice's grip tightened around my waist and I heard a faint rumbling from her chest against my back. "Like I said yesterday, it needed to be performed. I know I said I wouldn't tell Alice, but there was no other way I could get her out of the house. She wouldn't leave you no matter what, so I told her and they all left last night." Alice growled lightly, somehow making me smile. It quickly vanished when I processed everything he had said and everything that had happened.
"Why did you lie to me? I could have killed you Carlisle! And Rosalie-" I cut off, turning back to look at the platinum haired vampire. She was still looking away.
"I admit, now that I reflect back on the events, the idea wasn't too grand. But I needed to acquire some data about the extent of your venting depending on the situation and your emotions." Alice growled again when Carlisle said data, anything concerning experiments seemed to really upset her. "And I must say, I have collected a decent amount of information. I hope you wouldn't mind if you came back to my office later today to review your progress."
"Carlisle…" Alice warned, her grip becoming tighter. "Bella isn't an experiment."
"I know that Alice, I just want to share my discoveries with Bella…so she can be more careful." Carlisle spoke warily, his eyes flickering between Alice and I, praying he didn't hit a nerve. He did.
"She wouldn't have to be more careful if you hadn't taken me away from her in the first place!" Alice snapped, her voice becoming louder and more powerful towards the end. I guess this had affected her as well. I sunk back into her embrace, my arm wrapping around her back and we pulled each other in tight.
"For God's sake Alice. It was needed. If you're not going to make your mate one of us any time soon then she needs to adapt to what the hell's going on inside her. Get over it." Rosalie barked. Her eyes meeting Alice. I felt a brief twinge of annoyance when she only referred to me as Alice's mate, but let it slide. I smirked, remembering how I had owned her not long before.
What is wrong with me, that isn't a good thing.
But it is.
I shook my head, trying to remember what Rosalie had actually said. Something about turning me into one of them? Did Alice not want me to be one? I turned in the embrace to face Alice, she had a distant look in her eyes for a few moments before she inhaled sharply and looked at me. She whispered "Later." Before turning back to Carlisle. "Carlisle, Bella is tired. I want to take her home so she can relax after all this. If she isn't going to sleep then I want the time she has awake to be as stress free as possible after this. You should be wise and not think of performing anymore of these 'tests' if you know what is good for you." Alice sounded dead serious, almost menacing as she warned her father. Carlisle merely nodded as Alice scooped me up in a hold, a second later we were blurring through the forest the way I had come. Everything dismissed but not forgotten.
The feeling of the wind against me and the comforting embrace of Alice was calming, but I could feel her stiffen whenever we passed a gap in the dense forest where a tree used to be. Neither of us said anything, it wasn't necessary, most likely we'd talk about it again tonight with Carlisle in his oh-so-lovely office.
So much shit has happened in there.
I curled up further into Alice and she gripped me tighter, stopping briefly to flip me onto her back before continuing with renewed speed. We had to get out of here; I just wanted alone time Alice.
Alice seemed to agree as she stormed into familiar territory, her speed unrelenting as we came to the drive of the Cullen's' home. I briefly spotted my car among all the other flashy forms of transport, before we stopped outside the house.
"Bella, did you do this?" Alice asked, her eyes observing the doorframe. Just one of the many joyous memories I had left behind in my raging-lust-filled-frenzy. I nodded shamefully, rubbing my face against the side of hers in the process. Alice rubbed her head against mine when a whimper escaped me and said no more, running upstairs.
In her room, Alice laid me down on her soft bed before moving to close her door. She turned to look at me from the other side of the room and smiled sadly. I smiled back, not really feeling like smiling. "Bella…I'm sorry this had to happen." Alice made her way over to the bed, sitting on the edge with her feet on the floor. "I opposed it from the start, but…Carlisle said it was necessary. It wasn't necessary making you go through that though! I swear he has a twisted way of working." Alice ran a hand through her hair, ruffling it up more than it already was before sighing and looking at something interesting on the floor.
"I was so scared Alice, that you had left me." I mumbled, tears almost forming again when thinking of how I felt not long ago. "Don't do it again." I warned half heartedly, staring at the ceiling.
"Oh, Bella." Alice gushed, spinning and climbing on top of me, hugging me to her tightly and nuzzling into my neck. My arms instinctively wrapped around her waist and pulled her ever closer. "I'm so, so sorry!"
She started to dry sob against my neck, her body shaking like a fragile child's. I gripped her tighter, something inside me hating that my mate was upset, and that even though ever so slightly, it was my fault. I could never blame her for something like this, she only followed her Father's wishes.
Agonizingly slowly, Alice's cries subdued to quiet whimpering whilst I quietly rubbed circles into her back. Eventually she calmed down completely, and we spent the next hour in each other's embrace, just enjoying each other. I didn't know what the time was, maybe early afternoon, but I didn't care. I spent some of the time thinking back over what had happened. What had been said, what had been done. I seemed almost evil, not my usual self.
What scared me the most was how I loved it at the time.
Would I really have cared if I had killed Carlisle, or Esme, or Rosalie at the time? A strong part of me thought not, which was utterly terrifying, but also slightly exhilarating. I had to admit I adored the power I could harness out of thin air almost, and use it to my own free will.
But was it my free will?
Sure I had accepted the power when it asked to possess me. Whatever had happened back there though, it wasn't me. I wouldn't do that any chance I would get if I hadn't had the strength, not that I wouldn't be able to, but that's not who I am.
I'm Bella…and I want to protect Alice, not molest her! What the hell is wrong with me? I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, this is all so fucked up.
Once again, I found myself craving answers. I sighed as much as I didn't want to face him right now, I knew I had to. "Alice?" She indicated she was listening with a sound in the affirmative. I stopped rubbing circles and she leaned on her hands to push up on the bed, hovering over me. "I want to see Carlisle."
Alice frowned. "No. Not today, you need to rest." She looked at me sternly, her decision made. She could see my determination though and sighed "Bella, please. Just relax; you've had a rough day. I don't want to know what he has to say. It's unimportant, I love you no matter what is going on, isn't that enough?" She looked down at me pleadingly, her eyes liquid gold as she read my changing expression.
I didn't deserve her.
"Yes you do." Alice remarked.
I loved it when she could hear me.
"But Alice, I want to know what's happening to me. I don't want anything bad to happen to you or your family-"
"Our family." Alice corrected, I smiled weakly.
"You made me forget where I was."
"Good." Alice beamed. I rolled my eyes and grabbed the back of both her elbows with my hands, knocking her down so she landed on me again. I pulled her in for a kiss and pushed my tongue in when she gasped. "Aggressive today aren't we?" She mumbled against my lips, then letting her tongue dance with mine. I moved a hand to cup her arse and squeezed, making Alice giggle. We deserved this little bit of normalcy for once.
My hands trekked up Alice's slender back, skimming over her delicate neck before wrapping themselves in fistfuls of luxurious brunette hair. My legs wrapped themselves around Alice's waist, making Alice lower in between my legs where she nestled in closer. Through the feeling of her slick tongue and the softness between my fingers, I could still register the heat starting to emanate from Alice's core. It almost pulsed, sending waves of arousal and luring me into a daze. My hands lowered, snaking between Alice's body and my own, rubbing against our soft tops before stopping at the zip of Alice's oh-so-skinny jeans. I unzipped the offending piece of clothing swiftly, Alice squirming and calling my name against my lips. I lightly brushed my fingers over her panty-clad mound as I slipped my hand in. The smell of her arousal emanated into the air like a freshener, swirling around my nostrils and I inhaled deeply, moaning and rolling my eyes back. My fingers worked on their own, slipping past the tight band of her panties before-
"Cut it out you two. I can smell you from outside the house! What are you, dogs?" I froze, pulling my hand back and my lips broke Alice's to look up and meet the smug look of Edward in the doorway. I hadn't ever spoken to him properly, but he seemed like an okay guy.
Until just now.
I felt a growl start rumbling in my chest. How many fucking times must I be interrupted? I glared at him, willing him to get the fuck out of our room. He didn't budge, instead, he tilted he hip out and made himself very comfortable resting on the doorframe. He smirked at us. "I must say Bella. I have never seen Rosalie so embarrassed in my whole existence. Even Jasper was impressed, he had never beaten the Ice Queen when sparring." Edward nodded appreciatively, while a hiss could be heard from downstairs.
"Edward, I suggest you leave." Alice mumbled, her eyes heavily lidded but her voice full of warning.
Edward lifted his hands in the air, "Alright, alright! I was just here to pass the message on anyway. Carlisle wants to see you, and it can't wait." Edward's face became serious as he fulfilled his instructions. Alice visibly stiffened, any trace of the mood broken. Edward turned to leave. "You have my respect Bella." He winked before shutting the door.
Alice and I both groaned simultaneously, we met eyes and shared an awkward chuckle before she lifted herself off of me, then the bed, holding her hand out for me to take. She pulled me up into a brief kiss before I pulled away. "I guess this couldn't be helped." Alice spoke cheerfully, but I could see the glimmer behind her eyes, she was really dreading this.
"Alice it's going to be fine." I reassured her, pulling back but keeping contact of her hand. "What's the worst that can happen?" I looked out of the window briefly, thinking over my own question.
"Please don't say that." Alice smiled sadly, looking down at the floor. I cupped her chin and made her look into my eyes, we stared at each other for a few seconds, but it was enough for her to relax and her shoulders to drop. I smiled at her, stroking her jaw line with my thumb.
"Come on, if we don't go now I don't think we'll ever go." This made Alice laugh, which I was grateful for, as we made our way to the all too familiar office.
"It's your fault you're too cute." Alice chided.
"I think the feeling is mutual when I say we both can get carried away easily."
After that we both fell silent, taking comfort in our clasped hands. Alice's icy skin cooling my own. We made it to the end of the corridor, where the stairs to Carlisle's office presented themselves. I swallowed the lump that had now formed in my throat, Alice had made me nervous. She seemed to be dreading this much more than I was. We made our way up the stairs, slowing the higher we got. How many stairs did this staircase have? Not enough clearly.
We reached the top, where Carlisle's office door was eerily left open slightly. It was dark inside, and it made me think back to classic horror movies where at the end of a dark corridor there's always a door. I shook my head, clearing my childish thought. It's only Carlisle for God's sake.
We stepped closer, once there Alice tentatively pushed the door open some more. "Er…Carlisle? We're here…" Alice called out, poking her head out slightly to look around.
"Come in, come in." He sounded rushed, but not tired or anything else that would mean something was wrong. We both proceeded to move further into the room. Carlisle was in the corner of his office, his pointer finger skimming over the spines of hundreds of books. "I'll be with you in a second, just trying to find something." He spoke without looking at either of us, his eyes locked on the names of each individual biography or novel.
"What are you looking for Carlisle?" Alice called out.
"Nothing important. Well actually it is. The 1879 case to be specific. I seemed to have misplaced it."
Wait, he meant the diary right?
"Carlisle, I think you mean the book you let me read right?" I asked quietly. He looked up and met my gaze, which I quickly averted. I couldn't look at him, not after what I had done.
"Oh yes, that's the one. Sorry, I forgot I had lended it to you. How far have you got with it so far?" He stood up, moving over to his paper-clad desk. It seemed in even more disarray than normal.
I scratched the back of my head "I haven't really been able to get too far with it really. Just sort of the intro and that's it? Sorry." My voice grew weaker towards the end until my apology was barely audible. I looked up to see Carlisle's expression soften and a gentle smile graced his lips.
"It's fine Bella, I only gave it to you yesterday right? I don't expect you to have finished it already, you haven't had a chance."
"Yeah well… why did you need it?" I moved the subject on quickly, trying to bypass why I had been so 'busy'.
"Oh, I just wanted to see if the account about the human-vampire relationship had any more detail that I had missed when I skim read it before. I believe there was a brief part in the introduction, did you read about it?"
I stiffened, not liking this conversation at all. "Yes, I did." I replied quickly. "It's very sad." Sad is a light way of putting it, barbaric seemed more fitting. A vampire becoming enraged from something as small as seeing its mate talk to someone else? And then killing her? And the himself? Somewhat familiar.
"Carlisle, what did you want us in here for?" Alice cut in, her foot tapping on the floor irritably. Her nerves getting the better of her.
Carlisle chuckled lightly. "Calm down Alice, nothing is wrong, far from it really. I haven't quite finished my analysis as of yet but I've been talking to Esme and the others, and they agree-"
"Just say it!" Alice half whined. I squeezed her hand; she's such a child.
"Fine… Bella, we'd like you to move in with us."
Well, there you have it.
I think I opened a lot of opportunities with this chapter, still debating which road I should take it. Dark or not-so-dark Hehe.
I wanted it to be longer, but I didn't want it to drag, but now you know that Bella's a badass so… ;)
I promise to update sooner (will most likely be a week later)
Sorry for spellings and everything else noobish, I'm just incredibly tired ;')
Until next time!