II. A Dangerous Way
I remember when it happened.
College was going well. It was winter break but I was going through a lengthy rut, I haven't had a serious relationship with anyone since Juliet and that was ages ago. I didn't seem to have any desire in starting anything new. Maybe that's my fault? It's entirely my fault.
Alex had just come back from a date with some guy, some singer she mentioned. It was late at night and I was on the living room couch, watching stuff that prominently gets played at night but the second that door opened, the channel changed to the weather. I was quicker than the Flash.
She stumbled in, wearing a tight black dress and with all fancied accessories included. She looked good, too good for some karaoke singer but then again I liked karaoke.
"Good night?" I asked and she looked buzzed possibly due to some alcohol but she was of legal age now.
She smiled back and plopped down beside me, grabbing a hold of my arm. She doesn't let it go for a while, her head lying on my shoulder. I can smell her perfume and we sat there. No talking-nothing, completely comfortable in silence.
"Where are Mom and Dad?" She asked.
And that's when it happened. We get caught up. Now we don't do anything, we simply stare at each other, almost studying but studying usually means being forced to pay attention and I know we're not being forced to look at each other, not at that moment.
There was something there. I was so sure of it. I could get lost in her eyes and evidently so could she. Things could happen but after maybe ten seconds, I panic and find a way out, "How much did you drink?"
She looked away, a hint of offense showing but the moment effectively killed. She stood up clumsily, I offered to help her stand up but she pushed away.
"Enough." She said with some vigor. I sunk back against the cushions.
"Were you waiting up for me?" She asked.
"They asked me too." I'm honest but I'd stay up regardless to make sure that singer boy doesn't try to sing his way to my sister's bed.
She looked at me, then the television and snatched the remote like a snake catching a rat. I'm too slow. I'm not the Flash.
She pressed last.
The channel changed. She stood and watched a few seconds, long seconds.
I covered my face, expected to hear a scream that would surely wake everyone in the house, maybe even the block and then naturally I'd be sent away to some Re-Education school or rather, something along those lines.
But when nothing happened, I looked back up and saw a tiny hint of intrigue on her beautiful face from what my mind could calculate. This doesn't help that she wore a low cut skirt. And then those feelings return. I grabbed the remote back, showed a brave face and changed the channel quickly.
She smirked, "Have fun."
She disappeared up the stairs. Not a word spoken after. She never brought it up to anyone but that was the moment I thought of her in a completely different way, a dangerous way.
Few days later, I left back for college and those feelings subsided for what I hoped would be forever but forever just isn't long enough.