Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its characters.
A/N no SLASH just character pairing!
A/N this is set in the time period of when Jasper would have been 'turned'
Jasper Whitlock had always been stand-offish to any new people, it didnt help that a few weeks prior he had been diagnosed with epilepsy after he was breaking a new string of horse's, the fall caused his brain mulfunctoin and the doctor had told his it had 'disconnected' his brain wiring.
His parents had admitted him to the Washington state hospital. They told Jasper its what was best for him but the truth was they ddint want the town to know there son was 'crazy'.
Agather and Michael Whitlock where very important people in Houston. Agather was the head of woman's leage and Michael being Mayor they had a very high social status. They were ashamed of their sons diagnoses and didnt want anyone to know that their son was 'crazy', so they told people he went away to boarding school in Washington.
March 6th 1863
'' Jasper honey are you ok'' Agather's voice was worried and frazzled. Her son had been fine all morning up until he suddenly had an outburst of anger; cursing and throwing things.
'' Go away, You dont care, you want to put me away'' Jasper yelled at her whilst throwing a glass vase at the ground. Agather winced as the glass smashed.
'' Jasper, clam down; your scarring your mother, now stop it'' Michael was scared of his son. He believed the only way to handle such cases was to man handle Jasper . Michael leaned forwood and grabbed his sons hands restrainig them behind his back. Jasper was struggling under his fathers strong grip, Michael held his son still firmly as he pulled his sons head backwards he said aggresivley '' stop it now, stop I will lock you in your bedroom''
Jasper had gotten used to these threats of late; ever since his diagnosis his father had started being very short with him; locking him in his room, using restraints, tieing him to his bed for hours on end and even punching 'sence' into him.
Jasper wouldnt stop struggling he new he should but his brain wouldnt let him. Michael sighed and dragged his up the stairs to Jaspers bedroom Michael forced Jasper onto the bed using his hand to keep Jasper from struggling against him. Michael reached under the bed for some rope he tied Jaspers arms and to his side while tieing from under the bed a long leather belt that was being buckled at Jaspers mid section.
''you will stay there untill you calm down. Your mother will pack your bags where leaving for Washington tomorrow night'' and with that Michael left the room leaving his son tied to a bed trying to break free...
March 12th 1863
They arrived at the Hospital at 6pm sharp just as the doctor had requested. If the Michael and Agather Whitlock where anything it was punctual. As they entered the waiting room Michael told his son to sit and be quiet, Jasper did as he was told. After five minutes of being in the waiting-room a doctor wearing long white coat and dark grey pants ; he looked to be about mid fifty's, his hair was completly white and he wore small round glasses at the end of his nose.
''good morning. Im doctor John Bradley'' he said extending his hand out to Michael and Agather.
The doctor smiled at Jasper and extended his hand outward to him, Jasper eyed the hand determined to not be curtious to the man who was about to condem him to the four walls that currently surrounded him.
''Jasper, shake the doctors hand'' Michael said sternley while scowling at his son.
''its quite alright. Why dont we move down to my office'' doctor Bradley said trying to difuse the tention between father and son.
The Doctor lead the way down the hall to a small room filled with all the standard furniture a larg wooden desk, chairs and diplomas hung on the walls.
''well Mr and Mrs Whitlock im going to need these forms signed'' said Dr Bradley handing them the forms
''and what are these forms for'' asked Agatha
''they just state that you are placing Jasper in our care'' the Doctor said while glancing at Jasper.
Michael and Agatha signed the forms in a matter of minutes. Jasper noticed his mother had tears in her eyes but his father's face was hard as stone.
The doctor went into detail about epilepsy and stressed the point that it didnt make Jasper 'crazy' as some biggots would put it. He also went into things that Jasper would always be under a watchfull eye at all times. Jasper didn't like the sound of that.
After Michael and Agatha had finished signing the papers, they said goodbye to Jasper and left. Doctor Bradley started showing Jasper around his new 'home'; the hospital had a number of areas for certain sickness' there was a cancer ward, childrens ward, ER, and many more Jasper was located in the epeleptic unit.
Every Patient in the epeleptic unit where assigned an aid Jaspers was Edward Cullen; Edward was tall at 6.3, he had copper hair and exstremley pale skin. Jasper got along well with Edward. Edward explained what Jasper needed to know about the epeleptic disorder.
March 9th 1863
Dinner was at 6pm every night. Edward sat with Jasper while Jasper just staired at his food. '' Jasper you have to eat'' Jasper looked up at Edward ''I dont like soup'' said Jasper while leaning back in his chair. ''please eat your dinner'' Jasper eyes winced '' no'' Edward frowened '' Jasper if you dont eat you will be put on restriction and confinde to your room. do you really want that'' Edward said while leaning into talk to Jasper, Jasper thought fo a second after a moment and picked up his spoon and started his soup.
After dinner (that was bearly touched) Edward motioned Jasper to a door along the hallway the door with a wooden sign that read 7-C ''Jasper this is your room now lights are out at 10:00pm'' Edward opened the door he walked into the room looked very plan; it had a bed in the middle up against the wall it had a bed-side table with a lantern on top.
Edward and Jasper spent the next twenty minutes disscusing the rules of Washington state hospital. Jasper thought most of the rules were unnesesary just because he had epelepsy didnt mean that he all of a sudden he was incapable to take a bath, there where three main rules that Jasper was exspected to follow.
1. Must be supervised at all times.
2. No sharp objects.
3. must undergo therapy sessions.
Jasper hated the thought of being watched as he bathed. He was a very private person. The other rules just made him feel very uncomfortable.
I had been told a week prior to Jasper Whitlocks arrival that i'd be his carer. I really did care about my patients. People where so prejuides towards anyone who was different having epelepsy was pivotal point of being different, Every case I've seen go through here has been difficult each one scared about what was happening to them. Almost every patient I had delt with was over twenty so Jasper was going to be a little different;'adults seemed more open to change than adolesents. I felt sorry for Jasper, with the very few younger people I had worked with their parents stayed, visited, helped best they could but Jaspers parents left as soon as they could. It was going to be hard for Jasper to make it through this without his parents support.
Each day was hard Jasper just wasnt trying he refused to do anything that involved going outside. He wouldnt bathe because someone would be watching (to make sure he didnt drown) it was really trying my patients I tried so hard to prove to him that he was normal and could still do normal things, but it just wasnt working.
Tuesday March 11th 1863.
Jasper was sitting alone in the hospitals dining room stairing at nothing really in particular when suddenly his eyes roll back inside my head leaving just the whites of his eyes as he bagan to shake frantically.
Jasper's body became rigid and began to shake and jerk uncontroloblly Jasper's natural sun bronze skin was paling more and more by the second to an almost blue tinge. Edward had just entered the room when he noticed Jasper convotioning on the ground Edward sprinted to where Jasper side. Edward moved all things around Jasper out of reach. Jaspers head rolled back and forwood continuosly his arams and legs where moving rapidly from side to side . Edward was concerned the fitt had been going on for about three minutes.
The fitt lasted a long five minutes just as it ended Jasper vomitted all over the floor and blacked out. Edward with the help of doctor Bradley carried him to his bedroom and layed him on the bed.
''that was a fearly long one Edward'' said the doctor who had assisted Edward in carrying Jasper back to the room.
'' yes it was. Maybe we should consider putting Jasper on anticonvulsants'' said Edward conserned.
'' yes you may be right Edward, I didnt want to put him on medication untill I saw the kind of seziers he had'' the doctor Bradley said.
After an hour Jasper began to stir, his eyes opened at first he was unsure of where he was, it wasnt untill he got a good look at his surroundings that he realised he was still in the hospital. After a while Edward walked through the door way carrying a tray with water and a sandwhich.
'' What happened'' asked Jasper sitting up in the bed.
''you had an epileptic fitt'' edward replied handing Jasper the tray.
''it was pretty bad Jasper. We've decided to put you on medication'' Edward voice was very professional but on the inside he was having trouble dealing with the fact that a sixteen year old boy's life would be dependent on a tablet a day.
''how bad was it'' Jasper didnt like the idea of being deppendent on a capsil. He didnt like the idea even more that he couldnt remember shaking like a lunatic in front of who knows how many people it mad him self concious that he didnt have controll over his own body.
''it was bad enough that you blacked out. Oh and Jasper please take the medication it helps'' Edward went out of the room leaving Jasper to his thoughts and his sandwhich.
I stayed in his bed for the rest of the day thinking of how much his life had changed in such a short time and how my parents had so easily turned me over to this 'insane asylum'; my parents hardly even said goodbye they were just happy to see there insane son was locked up and not a harm to himself and others. I really was insane I wasnt normal, I was stuck inside four walls for that exact reason. I was trapped.
*April 14th 1863*
Edward hadnt been able to help Jasper with his 'condition' as easily as he had others. Ever since the day Jasper had the fitt he had cut everyone off (more then he already had). Jasper had to be watched while taking medication because it was discoverd out that he hadn't been swallowing his pills. Jaspers fitts had deffenetly 'toned down' they became less frequent with the anticovlsions. The only real problem Edward had was that he wasn't getting enough out of Jasper; he wouldnt contribute to conversations that Edward would start trying to find out what was wrong with Jasper every time he would talk Jasper would say he was tired and wanted to sleep or he was hungry and Edward being Jaspers carer had to take Jasper word for it that he was worn out. It did take alot out of someone having fitts.
Jasper was sitting on his bed when Edward came in. Jasper looked up at the unexspected visitor. It wasnt that Jasper didnt like Edward but everytime Jasper looked at him he felt that Edward was reading his thought and Jasper being the private person he was didnt appreciate the invasion of privacy that Edward continued to over-step.
'' Morning Jasper'' Edward asked smiling
''Mornin' '' Jasper said in a mumble
'' I was thinking that today we could go outside, maybe have lunch'' Edward voice was hopefull, he really did want to help Jasper and he thought going outside might make Jasper feel more alive.
''Edward I dont want to go outside today, maybe another time''
Jasper new Edwards plan he wanted him to be happy, but he just couldnt get happy. Not now.
''Jasper, please I really do think you should take a walk and get some fresh air'' Edward wasnt going down without a fight and Jasper new it.
'' I SAID NO EDWARD, DON'T YOU GET IT I MIGHT HAVE A FITT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE AND HAVE PEOPLE STAIR AT ME MARK ME A FREAK. NO THATNKYOU!.''
The words Jasper used finally helped Edward understand a little of what Jasper was feeling right now. ''Jasper im sorry I didnt know thats how you felt. Do you want to talk about it?''
''no'' Jasper voice was plan not an ounce of emotion came through his words. Edward's mouth formed a line he was getting tired of this, he was at the end of his teather. It was his job to help these people and it bothered him that he didnt seem to be able to help Jasper.
''what is it that makes you feel like a 'freak' Jasper?'' Edward's voice was strained, he held the bridge of his nose in frustration as he waited for Jaspers response.
Jasper looked up he didnt exspect any questions after his outburst and he still didnt feel sure enought to sppek so he shrugged.
''go away Edward''
'' no Jasper''
''can't people have pivacy in the god damn place'' to say Jaspers voice was 'angry' would be an understatment.
''listen. You need to realise that you arn't the only person with epilepsy'' Edward pointed his finger at Jasper as if he was trying to scold him.
'' I know im not Edward and what would you know about epilepsy, you dont know what its like to not have controll of your own body. so you can just leave me alone alright.''
'' Damn it Jasper, dont you get it, you. are. not. alone.'' Edward said emphsising each word as he said it. Jasper staired down Edward with hatred evident on his face.
'' I am alone, my parents left me here without even a second thought, they were to worried about what there friends would think of their 'crazy' son, they havent even visited in the whole two months I've been here'' Jasper had sat back on his bed and staired at the ground through his entire 'speech' to Edward.
''look Jasper Im sorry your prents haven't been here for you, but its no reason to act as though your the only person in the world who ever had this condition''
'' don't act as if you know how I feel okay Im a prisonor in myself'' Jaspers voice was getting louder and more aggresive each time he talked, it was starting to scare Edward.
'' Jasper people with epilepsi can live very normal lives, I've seen it happen thats why I work here to help people with the problem that you are going through'' Edward had sat down in the chair besides the bed with his head in his hands hoping he had got through to Jasper.
Jasper's POV (6 hrs later)
I sat their in my room all night thinking about what Edward had said. I was furious with my parents they had left me here not disscusing my condition with me once, they were only conserned with their social status to be worried with their lunatic son. On top of everything else I felt deppresed; I was to obsorbed in my own problems to notice that I was in a whole hospital unit full of people going through the same things I was, I felt so selfish. Then there was Edward, Edward had made so much sense I didn't want to admit it; their was the fact that I was scared to go outside, everytime I thought of going outside into civilisation I shuttered the way people would act if he had a fitt with all thoughs eyes watching; judging, ostracising. I've always had a problem being around people; I always felt like I was being a burden to the people who were around me; like my parents.
I decided that I would make an attempt to adjust to my epliepsy, maybe even write my parents a letter. Is not going to be easy, i'll try though.
A/N o.k so I dont think they had Anticonvulsions in 1863 but I needed a medication.
A/N R&R people I really want to know what you all think.
A/N I might write more, who knows.