Based on and inspired by Snack Time by AndrewRyanArt on Deviant art. Some of Sheps and Kaidan's lines are taken from the comments
Beyond All Odds Shepard had beaten the reapers and saved the galaxy, but getting hospital food that didn't taste like vorcha dung still proved to be an impossible task.
"Kaidan. It… it's green…" Muttered Shepard eying the green, mushy jello… thingy on his spoon with suspicion. He couldn't see Kaidan proberly due to his left eye being covered by bandages but he could still sense his lover rolling his eyes in exasperation.
"Yeah. It's also mushy. Come on eat you need your strength." Explained Kaidan calmly, carefully putting an arm on John's left shoulder. The right one still had a cast on from the crucible incident, which had been lovingly signed by the majority of Shepard's old squad mates. Luckily Kaidan had not been around to watch Grunt attempt to sign it, knowing the worrying biotic he would have had a heart attack in fear of Grunt causing more damage. Shepard still had to laugh at how the R was backwards. John fixed Kaidan with a puppy eyed look and whined:
"Kaidannnn, I'm a damn hero agaainnn… can't I have some REAL food?"
"John. If I had to eat the stuff while you were running around getting shot at then you have to." John put the food back onto the tray and began poking at it with the cutlery. Alenko rubbed his forehead. Shepard had only just woken up last night and Kaidan saw this as only the first of many trials. He'd been nearing the end of his patience by the time he got out of hospital, Shepard was not blessed with that level of patience. For a moment he pitied the doctors after John had been here for a week.
"You know you would have thought after a century, leaps in technology and alien influence, hospital food would get better. But nooo… it's gotten worse. Before the first contact war, it tasted like plastic, now it tastes like vorcha dung." Said Shepard, trying to divert attention from the fact he was not eating by using his light hearted manner. John kept a light smile on his face while Kaidan just glared at him, the lines of worry gone from his face. He dropped the smile and hung his head.
"No seriously, Kaidan! I'd rather face down a reaper while armed with nothing but a blunt toothpick than have to eat this… whatever the hell this stuff actually is." He pouted while pointing at the food. Kaidan couldn't help but smile at the statement.
"Well that's a bit hard since you just killed them all. So the other option is impossible, now come on." Picking up the spoon, he scooped up some of the green jello thingy (he had no idea what it was meant to be other than it did taste like plastic), and tried to put in John's mouth. But the solider immediately clamped his lips shut and shook his head. The one eyed glare warning Kaidan.
"John. I am nearly at the end of my patience. I swear if you do not start eating, I will restrain you with my biotics and force feed you." Kaidan spoke sternly, four years ago he would not have dared to speak like that to Shepard but his death, the hard years and promotions had brought out quite an authoritative streak in Alenko, which John quite liked. Shepard's eye widened in surprise and he made a fatal mistake.
"Kinky." He said with mirth, shortly followed by a muffled yell as Kaidan got the spoon in his mouth. Quickly putting his hand over John's mouth, he waited until the solider swallowed. John pulled a face, gagged and narrowed his eye at a somewhat smug Major Commander.
"I hate you." He spat out.
"I love you too, John. Now are you going to eat the rest willingly?" John glanced between the tray and his lover. Soon the shoulders fell and John admitted defeat.
"Fine I'll eat it. On one condition."
"If it's within reason. Name it."
"Since I smuggled in whiskey for you, could you smuggle in some proper food every so often? Maybe a burger." Looking at Shepard's pleading face, Kaidan couldn't help but smile and laugh.
Now I am not going to steal lines other people thought up so I am going to be crediting them
Andrew Ryan (please check out his art, it is really moving and it made me love the mshenko pairing)
LINCARD1000 (No seriously, Kaidan…)
SkyshepSR2 ( It… It's Green)
Rexxie12 ( Kaidannnn. I am a damn hero…)
The art is here
andrewryanart dot deviant art dot com/#/d5rm740
Just remove dots and spaces.