My sister gave me a list of prompts for a Yuffentine drabble. All chapters will be between the word count of one hundred and one thousand. :) Hope you enjoy, here's the first!


The second Vincent's TV turned on by itself, the gunslinger knew it had to be Yuffie. And she had to be up to no good.

"Hiya, everybody!" came a slightly higher, more feminine voice of the ninja. Vincent's jaw dropped at the scene unfolding before him. A tape recording of a puppet show was playing out, revealing one hand attached to a puppet that could only be described as one Lucrecia Crescent.

"Welcome to Vindictive of Valentine!" Another puppet appeared, speaking this line. Its stringy grey hair was pulled back into a ponytail, glasses hot glued to its leathery looking face, and a labcoat covering its felt body. Oh, Gaia.

"Hehehe," it cackled menacingly. "I'm Professor Hojo, and this is my bitch, Lucrecia!" Vincent's claw twitched. Oh, when he found that ninja, she was going to get it.

The sweet voice piped up, "And we are here to tell you about how we royally screwed Vincent over!" The Lucrecia puppet danced around and stopped in front of the camera.

"I didn't tell you about my role in your father's death – even though it wasn't my fault. Even after you told me it didn't matter, I denied your undying love and devotion to run off to the skankbag Hojo and have his baby, marrying him before even properly breaking it off with you! Then, when you let me go because all you wanted was my happiness, and you still stuck around to protect and care for me, I told you to piss off and stay out of my uterus because you tried to protect my unborn child!"

Hojo's puppet appeared, its voice sickening as it confessed, "And I put a bullet in your heart! But Lucrecia here couldn't help but feel guilty about it, even though it was too late. So what did she do? She put the Chaos gene inside of you so you could live forever with those horrid demons. Then, I locked you in a coffin until AVALANCHE, and the sexiest ninja around, found you!"

Lucrecia added, "And now, instead of moving on, I keep haunting you and pulling you back. You really know how to pick a girl! And all you can do is emo around and brood, because you're dead set on the idea that the world hates you!"

Vincent, having seen enough, yanked Cerberus out of its holster and shot the TV square on, shouting, "YUFFIE KISARAGI!"

Hope you enjoyed :D Thanks for reading, and please review!