Once upon a time there was only humans! But then the HUUUUGE asshole Trollestia killed all the humans that existed before the dinasours! And the humans was all like!

And Trollestia was all like!
"FFFFFFF- I cannot make trollface cause me am horse! Lol but that ok cause i have magicz and wings!"
And then she flew off into the sunset and burned up!
XXX Later that decade ponies started populating the planet that was known as Earth! (Seriously! What drugs were they on when they came up with this show?!)
The first pony was all like!
"Hurrrrrrr *drool*"
ROFL! All ponies were retarded cause Trollestia forgot to give them brain! And she was all like!
"OLOLOLOLOLOLOL that funny!"
Cause Trollestia cant die from burning cause she is a GOD!
BUT THEN! A pony that somehow got a brain from a family of rocks that turned out to not be rocks but just very small gray creatures that couldn't move or talk jumped out from a cloud of copy-paper!
"No! It's not funny! I haz brainz and i challenge you to a duel of milk drinking!"
The most random pony stated as she charged at the white and evil tyrant that was Trollestia!
"GASP! MY ONLY WEAKNESS! HOW DID YOU KNOW!"
Trollestia (Ice-)screamed as she drowned in milk!
"You are white and can use magic! So your only natural weakness must be milk cause milk is white and a fluid that makes your bones stronger!"
THE LOGIC IS TOO POWERFUL TO UNDERSTAND SO THE WORLD BLEW UP! XXX 1000 years later in the year of 100XAT (After Trollestia) ponies invented Pinkie Pie! It was their biggest misstake EVER!
"HOLY EFFIN SHIT MAN! PINKIE PIE IS LOOSE AND ANNOYING OUR BRAINS OUT!"
The random scientist guy said gently in his smooth relaxing voice.
THEN!11111 PINKIE PIE JUMPED AROUND THE CORNER AND STARED AT HIM!
"SOOOO PINK! UKAGJFDVABHKGDAJDTY!"
AND HIS HEAD EXPLODED!
THIS IS THE MOST ACTIONFILLED SHIT YOU'VE EVER READ IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE! GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! FEEL THE ADRENALINE RUSH THROUGH YOUR BODY AS YOU FLEX YOUR MUSCLES AND REALIZE THAT THIS STORY MADE YOU A MAN!
XXX (Insert calm classical music here)
Now we just have to get to the part where everyone dies. Please sit down and relax as we describe a most wonderful and quiet scenery for you.
The birds were swaying in the wind, the tree's were singing and Fluttershy was not Fluttershy at all anymore cause she had gone through a sex-change and was now named Fluttersteroids.
Twilight was on her way to the market that was only once a millenium when suddendly a rainbow colored cupcake jumped in her way!
"Twilight you must help me! Pinkie made a cupcake out of me!"
Thought the small cupcake cause cupcakes dont have mouths to talk with!
"nom!"
Said Twilight as she ate the cupcake!
As you read you think to yourself that this story must have been written by a 6 year old or just someone very imature, little do you know that one of those were right and it was not the first one.
BUT THEN... AGAIN! DEATH CAME FLYING DOWN ON FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK (Why make such a long name anyway?!)AND KILLED TWILIGHT WITH AN ICECREAM MADE OUT OF OPTIC LAZERS! "HARR HARR HARR I AM TRIUMPH!"
(CAPS LOCK MAKES THIS STORY AWESOME!)
BUT THEN! FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK SHOT ALL THOSE THINGS IN IT'S NAME OUT OF IT'S EAR AND KILLED DEATH!
OH NOEZ! DOES THIS MEAN THAT NO ONE CAN DIE AND THIS STORY CAN NEVAR END?! F NO! THIS IS MY STORY AND I CAN KILL ANYONE I WANT TO, EVEN IF THEY CAN'T DIE! I SHALL PROVE MY POINT BY KILLING FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK!
*FLUTTERICEFREAKFIRE-STARSOLARPLASMAFREEZE-BEAMSHARK is unaffected by death*
HOLY SMOKES! I HAVE NO POWER OVER THIS STORY ANYMORE! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
And then everyone died including me cause i tried to kill something that cannot be killed. Did i learn my lesson you ask? Pfft! Hey Godzilla come over here for a minute!