AN: This is my first fanfiction, so be kind. Anyways hope you like it. Review please!

Disclaimer: I don't own Life With Derek, unfortunately.

Speak Now

How in the world did it end up this way? Why am I even here? I mean yes he is one of my best friends and technically my step-brother. And yes all of my friends and family are sitting beside me but can I really stand here and watch the man that I love marry another woman. I look up at him, he really doesn't look that happy. Or maybe that's just what I want to think. Here comes the bride starts to play and the congregation stands and turns toward the pretty blond in the skin tight dress to watch her walk down the aisle, except me, my eyes are still on him. And he smiles but it's not his cocky, overjoyed smile that I love so much. This smile is nervous, this smile has doubt. Maybe, just maybe. We sit back down and watch as the ceremony begins. It really is a gorgeous ceremony, lovely flowers, lovely church, and a lovely time of year, I mean why wouldn't it be, I planned it. The only thing wrong is her. Then I hear it. The preacher just said "if anyone has any reason why these two should not be wed, SPEAK NOW or forever hold your peace" and suddenly all eyes are on me. Am I standing up right now? How did I get here? I swear Marti nudged me. But here goes nothing. And just then is when I wake up.

This is what my life has come to, dreaming that one day I will get up the courage to stop his wedding. And I wouldn't be so affected by it if it weren't the 67th time that I had the dream. I started making a tally sheet after the third. And I know what you're thinking but I date other people, actually that's kind of an understatement I date lots of guys but after all these years something has always brought me back to him.

Maybe I should start from the beginning. I met Derek Venturi when we were fifteen and his father, George, married my mother. We used to get on each other's nerves. In fact I used to call him the bane of my existence. Our family would be constantly annoyed with our fights. But I think somewhere along the line our fights turned into fun. It was a way for me to be around him. Senior year of high school we had actually become somewhat friends. I mean he would still prank me because he's Derek and why would he give that up, but it was different that year. It was then I knew he wasn't trying to hurt me anymore. It was just his way of getting my attention. When we got to Queens we had become even closer. He was the only one I knew from home and since I was missing my family so much I spent a lot of time with him. Whether it was sitting at his hockey games, going to parties with him, making him study, or just sitting around playing him in Babe Rader. He turned into my best friend and somewhere along the line I realized I was I was in love with him. But unfortunately all I would ever be to him was his best friend. and don't be fooled with his nicknames for me like Princess, Spacey, or Case, this love story has been one sided.

So I get on with my life. I go on dates. I do my job. In fact I love my job. I own one of the top event planning companies in all of Ontario. I do all kinds of events, but my favorite is definitely weddings. Unfortunately my most current client was Derek and his wonderful fiancé. In fact I'm running late to meet her right now about another crisis that seems to come up. So I grab my keys and purse and head out the door to meet her at the Hilton where they have been setting up for the big day tomorrow.

"Casey! Oh my god I am so glad you are here. Everything is absolutely wrong." Tori says as I walk through the doors of the grand ballroom.

"Okay, what seems to be the problem?"

"Well for starters nothing is set up yet! There should be tables and chairs and place settings and center pieces. Nothing is done!" I looked around and she was right nothing was set up yet. I looked down at my watch. It read 8:30 a.m. The workers weren't even supposed to be here until 9. How in the world did I not realize what time it was before she dragged me out of bed with her phone call? I sighed and looked at her.

"Tori. It's still early. The workers won't be here until 9 to set everything up. We have time still. Don't worry everything will be fine for your big day tomorrow."

"Oh. Well okay thanks. Sorry to get you down here so early. I hadn't even realized what time it was."

"Is there anything else you need?"

"Umm yes actually. Your sister is impossible."


"No sorry your step-sister. I have been trying to get Marti into her final dress fitting. And she is being stubborn as hell, saying she will not be a part of this abomination. I do not know how your family puts up with her." I tried my hardest to hold back the laughter that was trying to escape from my mouth. Go Marti.

I smiled. "Let me handle Marti. I'll get her to the fitting. Then I will be back here tonight to check to make sure everything is perfect, and will have my assistant make sure the rehearsal runs smoothly. After that the only thing you will need to worry about is getting a good night's rest."

"Thank you! I don't know what I would do without you." I smiled and turned to leave. I dug around in my bag for my phone. I dialed Marti's number and waited for her to pick up.

"Hey Spacey. What's up?" I smiled at her use of the nickname Derek had given me when we were younger. She and Derek were the only ones to ever use those names anymore.

"I hear you've been giving the bride to be a hard time. Well get ready to go out I'm coming to pick you up for your final dress fitting."

"Ugh do I have to. I really don't like her. Why do I have to be in her stupid wedding? I mean the only reason she even asked me is because I'm so close to Derek. I'm kinda surprised that she didn't ask you. You're his best friend."

"I know but you still need to do it." I said avoiding her last comment, because she had asked me. I could hardly plan this wedding let alone stand up next to them and watch her get what I want. "If you wont do it for Derek, at least do it for me. I've put a lot of hard work into this wedding."

"Fine. But I'm not going to like it. I honestly don't know how you put up with baby girl." I laughed at the nickname my siblings nickname for the girl Derek had chosen to be his wife.

"You know I would do anything for Derek…" I said quietly.

"I know Case. I'll see you soon." I could hear the sadness in her voice.

"Actually you'll see me now. I just pulled into the driveway. Get your butt out here." She laughed and hung up the phone.

Not a minute later she was running out the front door and into my car.

"So let's get this over with." She slammed the door. I laughed and backed out of the driveway and on our way to the dress shop. Forty minutes later I was sitting outside of a dressing room waiting for Marti to come out with the dress that Tori had chosen for her brides maids.

"So what do you think?" she asked when she stepped out of the room hidden behind a wall of mirrors. She looked absolutely beautiful. She was wearing a beautiful floor length ballet pink chiffon dress that had ruffles that started at the top and flowed all the way to the ground. It had a black sash that helped accent her waist. It was a beautiful dress, although not one that I would have picked out. Marti looked like she was going to Prom, not to a wedding. But seeing Tori's dress and the rest of the wedding, the dress fit perfectly.

"You look beautiful. You look so grown up." Tears started to fall down my cheeks. She looked at herself in the mirror. Contemplating the things I had said.

"Really? I mean I hate the color but I could definitely die it and wear it to prom next year." she turned around towards me. "Casey please don't cry it's just a dress." I started to cry harder. I put my head in my hands.

"I'm sorry Marti. I just I don't think I can be happy about this wedding anymore." I looked up at her and she smiled at me.

"I wondered when you were going to get some sense in that big brain of yours. I mean you've been planning a wedding for the man that you love and you aren't even the bride." I chuckled a little and wiped the tears of my face. She had always been the cleverest person I had known.

"How did you know?" she laughed.

"Oh come on. I may have been young when you moved in but the signs were always there. Even from the beginning. It's always been Derek and Casey. Casey and Derek. Why do you think I've been so mad at him for the past year? I hated to see him hurt you this much. You may have been acting happy but I could always see past that fake smile. I mean come on, when is the last time you had a serious boyfriend?" I thought about it for a second and laughed.

"High School." I replied. She laughed. "You're a smart girl Marti."

"I know. Now I'm going to get changed and you are going to get your man." I stopped laughing and looked at her.

"Marti you know I can't do that. I won't break up his happiness just because I'm unhappy. He is getting married tomorrow. If he hasn't realized he feels the same way about me by now then he isn't going to by tomorrow."

"But what if he's been waiting for you. He doesn't know how you feel!"

"No. he's had plenty of time. I'm sorry Marti. And don't worry about me. I'm finally moving my business to New York soon. In fact I leave in two days."

She looked sad, but she nodded and ran over to hug me. "I'm going to miss you Casey."

"I'll miss you too. But in two years youll be graduated and you can always come study in New York. I mean some of the best schools are in the states. Plus you could visit me anytime Mom and George would allow." I pulled away from her grasp and looked down at her and smiled. "Now let's get you changed. You have an abomination to rehearse." She laughed and ran back into her dressing room.

Later that night after the rehearsal our family home was filled with all of our old friends for what we decided was a way better way to celebrate Derek getting married than a bachelor party. I mean at a bachelor party Emily, Marti, Lizzie and I would not have been invited. This way we were all here enjoying each other. Sam and Ralph had both showed up with their wives. Edwin was there along with a bunch of guys from Derek's hockey team. All in all it was a great night. But I really didn't feel like celebrating. Not after the long day that I had. So I grabbed a small cooler filled with beer and headed to the back porch.

I sat there on the stairs and looked up at the sky. I thought about how things could have gone differently if I just had the guts to tell him that I loved him all this time. I mean there have been many times I could have done it. After high school graduation. Countless times in college. Countless times after. I could have told him so many times. But somewhere deep down always told me not to. Somewhere deep down I knew he would never feel the same way. So I kept my mouth shut and went on with my life and being his best friend. I heard the screen door open and close behind me.

"Hey Princess, there you are. I've been looking for you." Somehow I knew it was him before he even spoke. I smiled as he sat down and handed him a beer out of the cooler. "Thanks. So how come you're out here and not in there celebrating me." He smirked at me. I laughed.

"I just needed some time to sit and relax. I've been working all day. Your future wife has come up with crisis after crisis and is driving me crazy." He laughed.

"Come on Spacey, I can remember on countless occasions you freaking out to make sure everything went according to your plan." I laughed.

"True but it was only because you were always there to mess it up. I highly doubt you would screw up your wedding. So there is nothing for her to her to worry about." He chuckled.

"I heard you actually got Marti to try on her dress." I smiled when I thought back to earlier today and everything Marti had talked to me about.

"Yeah, it really wasn't that hard to do. She just doesn't like baby girl."

"Ha I know. She has told me plenty of times. Don't worry." I smiled. "Can you believe that I, The Derek Venturi, am getting married tomorrow."

"Nope. You'll always be a skit chasing cad to me." He pushed me lightly. I stuck my tounge at him. He laughed

"I remember you guys moving in here like it was yesterday. Can you believe how far we have come. If someone would have told me that you would have been my best friend six years ago, I would have never believed it."

"Neither would I." I laughed.

We sat there talking about all of our favorite memories we had of each other. All of the pranks he had played on me over the years. All of the guys he had rescued me from. All of the good times we had in college. We didn't realize what time it was until the party guests kept coming out and saying goodbye to the two of us.

It had been hours since the last person had left the house that our family had shared since we were 15. The house was dark and strangely calm. Our parents and siblings fast asleep. Yet we still sat on the back porch talking about old times. He had grabbed another beer from the cooler and scooted back towards me, closer than he was before. I rested my head on his shoulder and listened to him go on and on about the new team he had been drafted to. It was nice just sitting there with him one last time. But I knew this night would have to come to an end. I lifted my head off his shoulder once we were sitting in silence.

"So I have been meaning to tell you, but I won't be able to make it tomorrow. I have another job that takes precedence." I looked away from him so that he wouldn't be able to tell that I was lying. But he was looking right at me.

"Really Case." He smirked "You can't make it. You have been working on this wedding for more than half a year. What is Tori going to do without you?" He looked down. "What am I going to do without you…? I mean we're family." I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes because that word caused me physical pain. It was like he had just punched me in the gut.

He once again reminded me how stupid I was for feeling the way I did. He was family. He was my step-brother. But I would never see him that way. A single tear fell from my eye. I hadn't realized that he was looking back at me again until I felt his finger brush the tear off my cheek. He grabbed my chin and turned my head so that I was staring him in the face.

"Case, you know you can tell me anything. What is the real reason you don't want to be at my wedding tomorrow?" Now he was just making me mad. He could have just said okay and let it go. But I wasn't going to blow up on him. Nope I was not going to do it. "Come on Princess." Screw it.

"Stop it!" I stood up and backed away from him. "Stop calling me those names! My name is Casey. Not Spacey. Not Case. And definitely not Princess. Damn it Derek. You are getting married tomorrow! Fuck!" I looked down at him, and to be honest he looked a little scared. Maybe it was because I had started to pace and was actually cussing. I stopped and looked down.

"Case." I glared at him. "Eee. Calm down you are going to wake everyone upstairs." I rolled my eyes. Now that was just like him. Avoiding what the actual problem was.

"Do you want to know the real reason why I do not want to go to your wedding tomorrow?" He nodded. "I can't watch you get married to her, well I can't watch you get married to her again. I've kind of already seen it 67 times…"

"How have you seen it 67 times?" I laughed at the confused look on his face.

"My subconscious's sick twisted way of a joke?" He laughed.

"So you've been dreaming about me." He smirked as he stood up so that we were on an even level again. "And since you've always been neurotic you counted how many times you dreamt about me."

"Not the point." He laughed. I took a deep breath. "The point is that I can NOT watch you marry her when you should be with me! I love you Derek, I always have. And my heart has been breaking since the day you announced you were engaged." I finally had the courage to look up. To see what kind of reaction I would get from him. And of course it was just the one I had been expecting. His eyes looked sad. Like he felt sorry for me, the sad little puppy that I had become.

"Case." I held up my hand to stop him.

"No Derek you don't need to say anything. I know you would never feel this way about me. I mean who loves their step-sibling more than a brotherly way. It's wrong. So this time I'm leaving. I've accepted the offer to move my business to New York. That way you will never have to see me again."

"Oh. When do you leave?" I turned to head back inside, up to my old room.

"Tomorrow. Goodbye Derek." I opened the door and didn't look back so I wouldn't breakdown and cry.

"Bye Casey." Tears started to rush down my face.

The next morning I started to pack up my things in my apartment, trying to get my mind off of the wedding that should be going on a couple blocks from my apartment. So I turned up the music on my stereo and tried to drown out any thoughts that I was having about it. I was dancing around putting things in boxes when I heard my phone ring.

"Hey Marti, Whats up?" I looked over at the clock by my T.V. "Shouldn't you be getting ready for the abomination that is supposed to be happening today?"

"I was actually until I went to talk to my lovely brother. He was a mess. He said that you finally told him that you loved him and the conversation that you guys had on the back porch and then he asked me how long I had known because I didn't act to shocked about your revelation that you had. And I told him about yesterday and our conversation. But he stopped me and said that liar and ran out of here. So what did you lie to him about?"

"He did what? All I told him was that I loved him and I couldn't be there and that I was leaving for New York…" I suddenly realized what he meant by I had lied. "Oh I know. I told him that I was leaving today. Where is he Marti?"

"Right behind you." I turned around to see him standing in my apartment. I gasped and dropped my phone to the floor. He picked it up as she yelled "Case! Casey! Are you there? He said he had to go get his princess as he ran out of here."

"Hey Marti. Casey is gonna have to call you back."

"Derek?" is all I heard her say before he hung up the phone on her.

He walked closer to me and I finally found the words that I wanted to say to him. "So I guess I lied to you, I leave tomorrow not today."

He laughed. "Yeah I kinda figured that out Princess."

"I told you to stop calling me those names." He smirked at me.

"You know you never let me finish what I had to say last night." He moved closer so that there was only inches separating us.

"Oh yeah? What's that?" I smirked back.

"This" was all he said before he closed the gap between us. His lips were on mine. It was everything I had imagined it to be. He pulled back. "I love you too Casey. Always have. Always will." He bent down and kissed me again. This time with more passion than before.