Chapter 15: Two Halves Made Whole
Maybe it was because he'd truly believed, maybe it was just shock, or perhaps due to that significant detail (Sam had thought it significant, anyway) that he loved him, but for whatever reason, Sam didn't fight back, even when the pressure on his throat became painful.
Perhaps it had been the right thing to do because not even ten seconds passed before the hand was suddenly gone and he staggered back as Lucifer stood and stared at him with a disturbingly unreadable expression.
"You actually did it," he said. There was a pause. "Why?"
Sam clenched his lips together, shaking his head with a mild shrug. He knew he should be panicking right now, but somehow he just couldn't seem to manage it. "I promised, didn't I?"
Lucifer looked him over, his gaze scrutinizing. "You are a poor, naive individual, Sammy. So trusting, so desperate for affection."
"Only as desperate as you," Sam replied, the words falling from his lips before he'd even consciously thought about it. It was a mad, reckless thing to say, but somehow he didn't regret it.
And again, perhaps it had been the right thing to do, because in that brief moment he saw the truth in Lucifer's eyes. He saw everything, including himself reflected right back.
So Sam just stood there. He merely watched as Lucifer raised one arm, watched his fingers clench but nothing happen. He saw the devil's teeth grit and his head shake.
"Why?" He hissed, barely more than a whisper as he stared at Sam as if the answer were written somewhere on his body. "Why can't I kill you? I can, I could."
"But you won't," Sam said quietly. "I know you won't."
Lucifer let his arm fall back to his side, his wings drooping, a tired breath escaping him as Sam stepped forward once more until there was hardly an inch between them. Lucifer met his gaze briefly, before languidly turning his head to the side, staring out the window at the dark sky. "You win."
Sam shook his head, finishing what he had intended and wrapping both arms around the devil- angel, his angel. "No," he said. "We win. You and me." He sighed, closing his eyes and marveling at how solid Lucifer felt in his hold. "I love you."
It took a good thirty seconds, but eventually, Sam felt the wings enclose on him and wrap around them both. "Let my father know his last pathetic joke has worked. Screw the rest of this damn planet and everyone on it, but I love you, too, Sam. I do."
It turned out Nick had a hot tub. Lucifer had come out of Hell rather mussed and Sam hadn't been much better after fiddling around with blood and herbs and all the other things he'd needed for the summoning ritual.
He sat behind Lucifer, gently scrubbing his wings until they obtained the fine, silky state worthy of an archangel.
"Did you ever think I would do it?" Lucifer asked suddenly, breaking the humble silence that had fallen over them for the past fifteen minutes,
"Kill me?" Sam shrugged. "It was funny, I thought about it before I brought you back, even worried about it, but when your hand was around my neck I just somehow... knew."
Lucifer sighed, caught somewhere between resentment and grudging acceptance. "I'm not sure I'm comfortable with you knowing me so well, Sammy."
"Funny," the hunter commented with a small smile. "I often think the same thing about you."
Lucifer drew his wings in, turning round so they were face-to-face, the feathers trailing ripples in the water's surface. "You do realise that this is forever, right? Quite possibly in the literal sense. I am all but immortal, Sam, and I meant it when I said I intend to keep you."
Sam just nodded. "I know." He shrugged. "Sometimes I feel a little intimidated by it, but then I just think that we've always been together in some sense, really. So we just carry on the same."
"I know you're not happy, Sam. Not completely. You miss Dean, Castiel."
"Yes," Sam replied honestly. "But I have no idea where they are. If I ever get some clue, any hint, I can't say I won't try and find them but for now..." He paused, sighed and dragged his eyes up to meet Lucifer's. "For now, I still have you at least, and for that I'm grateful."
"So what now?" Lucifer asked. "We go off and live happily ever after?" He tilted his head to the side, raising both eyebrows with clear sarcasm.
Sam smiled mildly and shrugged, the water rippling around him. "I don't know. I feel I should keep hunting; there's people who will always need saving."
"Humans," Lucifer muttered, rolling his eyes.
"Humans I want to help," Sam insisted. He sighed. "Look, even though you've now got your mojo back, I don't expect you to help me or anything. And I haven't forgotten what you said about your grace and that I may be able to control you."
Lucifer gave him a mild glare. "If you think you're going to be able to keep me on a leash, forget it."
"I know that," Sam replied. "But I am glad I can... keep track of you. I don't want you to hurt people, Lucifer."
Lucifer just shrugged. "The apocalypse is off, Sammy. So don't worry, I have no immediate purpose to going round destroying nations."
"Then what do you want?" Sam asked. "I'm serious. You said once you want me to be happy. I want you to be happy, too."
Lucifer slowly dragged his gaze up to Sam's face. "You really are a strange creature, Sam. Wishing happiness for the devil."
Sam's lips twitched into a small smile. "Well if you're a freak, I'm one too. But I'd like to think I still have a shot at happiness, so yeah, I think you do, too." He sighed, raising one arm, the water trailing off of it, to gently touched the side of Lucifer's face. "Now tell me, what do you want?"
There were a few moments silence, before Lucifer finally replied. "I have nowhere to go, Sam. No purpose. No apocalypse, no fight with Michael, forever cast out of my own home. In all honesty, Sammy, I think for now, I'm content to just be with you."
And Sam smiled. "That's good."
"Because it means we want the same thing."
Lucifer raised an eyebrow. "This could end disastrously, you know."
"I know," Sam said. "But pretty much everything in my life has always had that risk, so I'll take the chance."
One year later...
"GOOD MORNING, VIETNAM!"
Sam groaned, batting one arm half-heartedly in the direction of the shout that had just penetrated his ear, frowning into the pillow at Lucifer's laughter before raising his head to glare at his angel. "I've told you not to wake me like that."
Lucifer merely smirked in response, stood beside the bed with his arms folded. "But it's time to get up, Sammy. Can't have you getting lazy now, can I?"
Sam huffed, rolling his eyes as he glanced toward the clock on the hotel room bedside table. "Alright, alright, I'm up." He sighed, dragging himself out of bed and toward the bathroom, noting with a smirk as he passed him that Lucifer was wearing the black hooded jumper Sam had brought him, rather than that usual outfit of Nick's which he was ridiculously attached to.
"So, what are our grand plans for today?" Lucifer questioned, following him through to the bathroom as Sam turned on the tap and began to clean his face.
"We need to follow up on that lead about a poltergeist at that hotel," Sam replied, patting himself with a washcloth. "So get your suit on cause we're gonna need FBI access."
He blinked and Lucifer's outfit had obediently changed, a finely tailored suit now adorning his form, though the two great wings still splayed from his back.
"And put the wings away," Sam added with a small smile, reaching for the toothpaste.
"But you like the wings, Sammy."
"Yes, but they may attract a rather unwanted amount of attention out in public." He met Lucifer's gaze in the mirror. "Besides, maybe I want to keep them all for myself."
He fought back a smirk as Lucifer actually did as he was told, spinning round to capture his angel's lips with his own. He did indeed know Lucifer too well.
"Right," he said, leaning back with a smile. "I'll get dressed, we'll get breakfast and get going."
"Or you could just go out like that," Lucifer commented, pointedly looked over Sam's tall frame, currently dressed in just a pair of navy boxers.
Sam gave him a mild glare as he passed back into the bedroom. "I'd really rather not."
Lucifer shrugged as he followed. "Perhaps I'll just remove your clothes when I feel like it."
"Don't you dare," Sam said firmly, remembering all too well a couple of months ago in the library when Lucifer, bored and whining for his attention, had resorted to snapping his fingers and making Sam's clothing disappear. Needless to say, Sam had been less that pleased.
Once in his own suit and ready for a day of hunting, Sam led Lucifer over to the hotel's nearby diner, taking a seat in the corner by the window.
He glanced round at the few other occupants around at eight am on a Tuesday morning, silently wondering what they thought of the two men sat in the corner. The rest of the world could see Lucifer too now, though he still occasionally chose to make himself invisible to all but Sam. But appearing as he did right now, Sam silently marveled at the obliviousness of their fellow diners to the fact that the devil sat amongst them. He supposed they merely appeared to be two friends sat having breakfast together, perhaps even- and Sam blushed slightly at the thought- a couple. Though Sam had awkwardly and blunderingly referred to Lucifer as his boyfriend once and the devil had given him a look caught between amusement and disgust that showed all too clearly what he thought of that title.
"You're my mate, if anything, Sammy. That's how an angel would refer to it."
"Well, 'mate' is something humans use to refer to animals," he had replied.
"Anything's better than boyfriend. It sounds as if we're in high school." He had paused and grinned. "Actually, it's still easiest to refer to you as my little bitch."
Sam had rolled his eyes, shaking his head and pointedly ignoring the last comment. "Boyfriends can be adults, too. There's nothing immature about it. Or do you really want to get properly hitched so I can call you husband instead?"
"That's another thing," Lucifer had said. "Why do you humans need some official document for everything? What difference does signing a form make to a relationship?"
Blatantly ignoring that Lucifer had a point, Sam had huffed and attempted to walk away, but Lucifer had followed him, as always. "It's not just about some document. It's about making a commitment and dedication."
"We've been dedicated to each other since you were born. Literally. M.F.E.O., remember?"
"Yes, but... Just..." Sam had sighed, silencing his angel with a kiss instead. "Forget it," he'd said with a tired smile. "We don't need titles or anything. You're a part of me, I think that's commitment enough."
Biting his cheek to stop himself from laughing at the memory, Sam looked across the table at Lucifer, caught in one of his many wondrous moments of contemplating how on earth they'd ended up here.
Sighing, he reached out and entwined their fingers, feeling the now familiar and recognisable flicker of Lucifer's grace inside of him at the contact.
And Lucifer squeezed his hand in response, a content smirk lingering on his face. It was a small sign of affection, but just the type of thing Sam treasured. He knew that maybe Lucifer would never get over his hatred of the human race, that he was still vicious and cunning and would not hesitate to kill anything in his way, but still, if Lucifer could love Sam, just one human being in six billion, he had to feel that that was just the smallest bit of progress.
Unknown to the two of them sat at that table in the corner in one of the thousands of diners in America, somewhere, a few hundred miles away, there was a flash of light. In fact, it was a doorway, that stayed open only briefly to allow one figure to stumble through, panting, bloody, and covered in mud.
Dean Winchester, once sure he was back and safe and out of the horrid place he had been, sheathed his battered weapon, sighed, and set off to find his brother.
The past year had been tough for him, as it would be for any unfortunate human stuck in a place such as Purgatory. The stress and chaos of it all had perhaps even been enough to make him forget about the talk he'd intended to have, about everything that had happened, and left him assured that he would find his brother alone.
Also unknown and unseen to the two sat in the corner, another man was seated in the diner at that moment, a few tables away but with a clear view, and a steaming mug of coffee in front of him.
The man watched the two of them with a smile, unseen to them merely because he chose to be unseen. Though part of him almost wanted to let them know that he was here, that he had seen and observed and watched them make the right decisions. Really, he just wanted them to know he was proud of them.
The rest of the diners could see him, but left him unbothered and alone, just another simple man sat amongst so many others. If they had asked, he would have told them his name was Chuck, but Sam knew that already, if only he could see him now. If Lucifer could, well, he would of course know him as someone- something else.
Chuck leant back in his chair, smiling with them as Lucifer whispered something to Sam which made him laugh. The sight made him wish he could match every angel with their own human, but this was a lesson Lucifer specifically had needed to learn and despite all the pitfalls Chuck had never once given up hope that he would.
He knew Dean's return would be a challenge for his son- Lucifer never had been good with sharing- but he was confident Sam could help him through it.
The smile still on his face, Chuck finished his coffee and stood up, his gaze still lingering on the couple in the corner. He straightened his shirt, pushing the chair in and turning away toward the exit.
The little bell on the door chimed, though neither Sam nor Lucifer saw the man leave. In fact, nor did they notice that the previously wilted single red rose on the windowsill beside them suddenly unfurled and bloomed bright within it's vase, as if overjoyed with the presence of two figures beside it who, unknowingly- in some sense, at least- had always been destined to end up here.
Oh my God (pun fully intended) it's done! Thank you all so much for reading this far and even more so if you've been kind enough to review. I hope the ending wasn't too corny but Sammy and Luci deserve some happiness dammnit!
Anyway, thank you so much again for being lovely readers and motivating me to finish this. I also apologise for being mean with the cliffhanger in the last chapter (actually I regret nothing...), but hopefully this happy chapter made up for it.
*hugs lovely readers and skips away*