A/N: Hello dear fanfic readers! I'm re-doing this story but most of it is staying the same. I apologize for the many mistakes I will and do make. I also can't promise regular updates but I'll try my best. Please read and review, PLEASE! Any feedback is appreciated. Also if any of you guys can think of a better title please give me some names or advice. I'll make sure to recognize you guys. Thank you for reading (and perhaps reviewing). The first Chapter is Beast Boy's POV. The next chapter will be the rest of the scene in Raven's POV. I hope you enjoy the story!
Disclaimer: I so wish I owned Teen Titans but I don't :'
A smile here, a joke there, and a great deal of fake idiocy. This was Beast Boy's mask. Beast Boy knew that wearing one was wrong but everyone had one. Robin literally hid behind a mask all the time, Starfire's naïve knowledge about Earth's ways hide her knowledge about the brutal worlds beyond Earth, Cyborg also hides behind jokes and laughs (that probably explains their close friendship. Cyborg is more expressive about his pain though), and Raven hides behind her excuse of "can't control my powers if I feel". He saw through all of their masks. He sees their pain and tries to make it better but the only time he does that successfully is when he makes a fool of himself. Which wasn't bad, it was so easy to do and it created a perfect mask. But it had become him. The masked Beast Boy was a version of himself that he liked and enjoyed being sometimes, but recently he began to hate it. It was tiring to hold up a mask when Beast Boy could barely hold himself together. Plus a lot of people didn't like the masked Beast Boy (or they were extremely annoyed with it). Either way, people believed the mask and that's all that mattered. Yet, his mask had a lot of cracks- his primal side showed his capability to be an animal, or to some a monster. Recently he began remembering a lot of painful memories that caused the cracks in his mask to become noticeable. Terra was a another crack, Trigon and Malchior stealing his Raven, and Brain's attempt to destroy the Titans were only pushing the cracks wider.
Beast Boy had also been changing into his primal side involuntary but he knew it didn't do anything harmful. If anything it seemed to prevent a more dangerous thing inside of Beast Boy from coming out. Something he hid long ago. Even now he didn't want to face it. There was another matter he wasn't willing to face: he was falling- no, he is in love with Raven. But his mask couldn't have that. With the mask they're polar opposites. Plus she didn't like the mask; she might not even like the real Beast Boy/Garfield if he's still there. He needed this trip to fix and separate his mask. It was becoming suffocating and was mixing with the real him (if there is a real him anymore).The cool, vast starry night was soothing for Beast Boy. It almost reminded him of the good times with his real parents. The Titans are his family now but he missed the times when he was a happy human child with amazing parents. Now he's just a half-human/animal thing that tries (and fails) to make others happy but ignores his own pain. The pain of the past and some pains of the present. Sometimes he wished he could forget the pain or have the courage to tell someone about it. Suddenly Beast Boy caught a whiff of lavender and old parchment.
"It's not like you to be out here alone, especially on our first vacation trip," Raven said in her normal monotone voice. Although, Beast Boy could hear a hint of concern and surprise in her voice. She always has perfect timing. Beast Boy thought as he saw her come into the light of the moon. He couldn't help it when he began admiring how angelic she looked.
"I wanted to make sure I got the full relaxing effect of Japan," Beast Boy said with a grin, hoping his façade didn't crack. He loved Raven but he prayed that her curiosity wouldn't poke around. He couldn't take off his mask now. He was afraid to show her what was underneath the mask. He barely knew what lay under the mask. Of course a tiny part of him wanted to tell her everything but his fear won out.
"Are you sure that's all?" Raven asked. She looked at him with concern. That's when he remembered that Raven was an empath. She probably felt his pain. That's the only reason she would come outside. He knew that he could barely stand it; it must be suffocating for her. So he put his mask on shielding and hiding his pain from her.
"Of course! Why else would I be out here? I mean all the comic book and video game stores are closed, duh!" Beast Boy said with his usual dumb act hoping, praying she would buy it.