DISCLAIMER: I do not own Gilmore Girls. Duh.
Just a one-shot!
Hi. God, that sounds so juvenile. I wish I could be all original and actually write a letter like the ones in all those books we read, where the main character gets a letter that entirely changes their world, turns it upside down, like the one Elizabeth Bennet got from her Aunt in Pride and Prejudice. Have you read that book? I know you told Paris that you'd read Jane Austen but I don't know what you would have read. I'd peg you as having read Northanger Abbey, you know, the shortest one?
I'm rambling again. You're probably amazed I can do it on paper too (insert 'Dirty!' here.)
I'm in Washington for a summer internship. With Paris. I didn't tell you before I left. It was pretty much right after Sookie's wedding and . . . Well, you know. I'm away for the whole summer, hence the letter. Ok.
I kissed you.
I kissed you. I bet you are smirking as you read this and I don't blame you. I've never written a letter where I'm spilling my feelings so I really hope this doesn't come across as cliché and sappy.
You just showed up, Jess. I was there, at a wedding, with Dean. Dean, my boyfriend of almost two years and then I saw you. You were just standing there with no expression on your face. No hopeful smiles or annoying smirks, just you.
"I moved back." That's all you said. You didn't even have to declare your never-ending love for me for me to throw myself at you. And I did. I kissed you because I was tired of holding back and you were there and back and home and . . .
God, I messed up. That was our first kiss and we weren't even together. I cheated on Dean! I never wanted to cheat on Dean. I wanted to end it with Dean at some point and then kiss you, kiss you with the freedom of kissing whoever I wanted because I was allowed to.
You kissed me back.
I didn't want to end that kiss. You may think I did but I didn't. We fit together and it wasn't awkward and it was just normal and I loved it. I wished I could keep kissing you but the reality of the kiss came back and I ran. I'm good at that, running when things get tough or awkward. That's what we Gilmore's do. We can yell really well and then we can run from the people we yell at.
I don't even know why I'm telling you this. I guess I just want you to know that I don't regret the kiss. Not at all.
Do you want to be with me? As my girlfriend I mean? Because I want to be with you. I want to be 'the hooligans' girlfriend. Taylor will have a field day. But I don't care. I just want to know that I am reading the signs correctly.
I'm going to break up with Dean. That seems so cold to write but I am. We're not . . . We don't fit together anymore. He needs someone who wants him around all the time who is happy to do stuff like sports and things like that but I want the intellectual.
I haven't yet. I am going to do it when I get home. I think breaking up with someone via letter is pretty cold and Dean doesn't deserve that. I'm not just breaking up with him because of the kiss. It was coming up to the time for that anyway. Would you believe I almost broke up with him the night you came around with food? I saw how well you fit in my house and then he flipped out and I wanted him out. I freaked out though and held on, hoping I was just being stupid.
I'm coming home at the end of the summer. I know writing letters would probably not be your forte but can you let me know if you want to be with me? I don't think I could last not hearing anything for four weeks.
I've got to go, Paris has a date that she needs help with dressing for.
Don't steal any gnomes without me,
Hope you enjoyed - just came to me as I procrastinated from homework.
Read and Review!