A/N: The Unconventional series was planned pre-ep 83. So far, it hasn't been canonballed, but I'll let you know when it devolves into a complete AU. It is not necessary to read parts one (Unconventional) and two (An Unconventional Friendship) to understand this, but I certainly highly encourage it.

Summary: Set between the SF tour and Lizzie's rush to get home to Lydia. " Lizzie was dimly aware that she should not be staring, near open-mouthed, at Darcy while he was wet and in a towel and there was steam…"

An Unconventional Shower

"So where's your brother today?" Lizzie asked as she and Gigi unpacked the candies they'd bought earlier for their girls' day at the Darcys' condo.

"I don't know; he didn't say anything to me earlier, but his car's not here. Why? Do you desperately want him here? Because I can totally call him – "

"No. I think I can survive," Lizzie interrupted, ending with a sarcastic tease.

"If you're sure…"

"You know what I could use?"

"Reese Witherspoon, Ryan Phillipe, and way too much chocolate and wine?"

"Well, yes. Always. Also, a bathroom."

"Oh, it's – " she stopped short and frowned. "Ugh, I think our downstairs bathroom is still not working properly. Straight up the stairs, second door on the left. You'll go through one of our guest bedrooms – there's a bathroom attached."

"Of course, there is."

Lizzie followed Gigi's directions, shaking her head at how absurd having so many bathrooms that they were attached to all the bedrooms. She wished she'd had her own bathroom instead of having to get ready while battling her sisters for counter and mirror space. Though Gigi and Darcy sharing a bathroom was too weird an image to even be funny.

She pushed open the second door on the left and found herself in an impeccably neat, but somehow still cozy, bedroom. The deep blues and soft greys reminded Lizzie of the foggy bay just before sunrise. She smiled and let the irony hit her that she felt more at home in a guest bedroom in William Darcy's house than she had in the one in Bing Lee's.

She was nearly to the door she assumed was to the bathroom, when it opened of its own accord and out stepped William Darcy in a towel.

William Darcy.

In a towel.

When did William Darcy get abs?! Lizzie was dimly aware that she should not be staring, near open-mouthed, at Darcy while he was wet and in a towel and there was steam…


Her eyes snapped back to his perplexed face so fast it hurt. "Uh… D-darcy. Um. Hi."

"Why are you in my bedroom?"

"Gigi! Your sister. She said that this was the guest bedroom and… I'm looking for the bathroom. The one downstairs isn't working. Allegedly."

"Ah. Excuse me." Darcy brushed past her, his arm grazing hers and she hoped her sharp intake of breath wasn't quite as loud as it was in her ears.

"Gigi!" Darcy yelled from his doorway, and somehow that broke Lizzie from her reverie of watching the beads of water roll down his back. She had never expected the Darcy siblings to yell to each other from their rooms the way she and her sisters did.

"William, is that you? Whenever did you get home?"

"Gigi, you knew I was home today!"

"But your car is gone!"

"You know that it's in for an oil change!"

"Oh my goodness, I completely forgot!"

"Gigi, we talked about this!"

"Talked about what?"


"Fine, I'm sorry, William!"


"And I'm sorry, Lizzie."

He turned back to Lizzie. She looked everywhere but at him. "So, um, I should… let you get dressed."

"I'm sorry about her."

"Ok then." They danced around each other for a moment, as she tried to get to the door without touching him again, but he finally grabbed her shoulders and resituated them.

And she promptly ran away.