"What?!" Nine teen year old Richard Grayson cried to Alfred.
The old butler gave the ebony an impassive look as he nodded.
"Alfred, are you crazy?!"
"To the extent of my knowledge, no Master Grayson."
"You seriously want me to take them out? Like with people?"
"Yes, I am quite certain most humans go out and about surrounded by other humans and engage in human interaction."
"But Alfred!" he sighed and ran a hand through his ebony hair. "Okay look I don't mind taking Tim. Hell, maybe Jason wouldn't be too bad as long as we have him on a short leash. But Damien is not human friendly. He is a hazard!"
"I heard Jason and leash." Said named person as he walked in. Jason walked into the lounge where Dick and Alfred were talking in dirty holey jeans and an oil stained white muscle shirt suggesting the seven teen year old he had been working on his bike. He held a water bottle since he told Alfred he would try and cut down on the beer. "I don't know what kind of kinks you have Grayson but I'll tell you right now. Not. Interested."
Alfred gave a disapproving look and Dick stuck out his tongue as if he were younger than Damian. "That makes two of us."
Jason merely smirked as he opened his bottle to take a swig. "So what's going on?"
Dick frowned. "Alfred wants all of us to go out to the movies."
Todd made a choking sound and spit out his water.
"Master Grayson, next time be sure that Master Todd is not drinking anything. I do not need anything else happening to him."
Jason finally regained his breath. "Uh, like a stake out for something? Are we investigating?"
"Nope bonding outing!"
This time Jason made a choking gagging noise. "You can't be serious Alfred?"
"I'm afraid I am Master Todd."
A sigh filled the room as another ebony entered. "I heard Jason spitting out and choking on water." Tim said as he walked over his blue eyes roaming the room quickly taking in any details such as the water stain on the ground. "What happened?"
"Aaww and you came in to check on me Babybird?" Jason grinned cheekily.
Tim's eyebrow twitched with slight annoyance to disguise his rising blush. Dick gave a smirk at the reaction but answered Tim. "We're going out to the movies!"
Tim looked confused and alarmed. "Uh, what? Did Jason ask you out?"
"Why jealous?" Jason smirked as he tossed an arm easily over Tim's shoulders. "No don't worry, Dickie isn't my type. My types more-"
Dick snickered as Tim's blush had become more prominent and Tim had cut off Jason with a rather vicious elbow to the rib. Jason merely laughed. Dick answered "No we're all going together to see a movie since Bruce is at a meeting in some other state. Or country and Alfred is cleaning and what not he said we should out to see a movie together."
Tim sighed again. "It was an order, wasn't it?"
"Yeah more or less."
"Well, hell to that, I'm not going!" Jason said as he began to turn.
"C'mon Jay don't be like that!"
"Like what?" he snapped.
"All dark and brooding. Like you have anything better to do!"
"I can think of a lot of better things to do than watch a movie with two dodo birds." He said rolling his stormy green eyes as he crossed his arm.
Dick paused before he continued. "Uh, actually it would be three dodo birds." He said sheepishly.
"Wait, does that mean the demon child is coming along?!" Jason realized alarmed.
Tim paled. "You can't be serious!?"
Dick sighed. "Yeah, don't worry, he'll behave!" he said hastily.
"Yeah if we carry him around in a choke chain maybe."
"Master Todd please do not speak of young Master Wayne so. He is your brother." Jason was about to interrupt but Alfred held up his hand to cut him off. There are little to none people who shut Jason up let alone are willing to try but Alfred could easily and he had no trouble exercising this power.
"This shows exactly the reason you four need to go out together. You have all had complications with each other and difficult trauma but have lacked the social connection with reality and need to adapt to each other's comfort." They glanced at each other awkwardly remembering all the times they tried to kill each other and other things that happened.
But Alfred kept going "Furthermore the young Master Wayne is the youngest and newest of you four which is the precise reason you will need this. Did it not occur to you three that this maybe the source of his malice. That he was never shown a child hood and perhaps he craves the attention. I do not believe it is right that you think of him so. I'm sure you have known what is like growing and training in the Shadows. Loosing family. Or being forgotten or abandoned by family. What this boy needs is a family. You all do. Whether it is by being together in a relationship being a brother or cousin or aunt, uncle, whatever. So with that note I suggest you go tell the boy and get ready. When you come back there will be cookies ready." And with that Alfred walked out leaving them all absolutely speechless and feeling ashamed.
After awhile Jason finally spoke. "Damn why does Alfred have to make us feel all warm and fuzzy but like assholes at the same time?"
"Because that's who you are." Tim smirked then began to walk out. "So you are going?" it was more of a statement.
"Shut up! Someone has to go and make sure this guy doesn't kill you guys"
"I didn't think you of all people would mind." Tim said with a slightly hard tone.
Jason merely rolled his eyes again. "Let it go. But true doesn't mean I still don't think about it."
Dick smiled at his younger brothers and said as he followed "I guess we better tell him."