The Cherry Blossoms beyond White walls
A/N: This is for WhiteAngel128(Happy Birthday), as well as 1827 month. I've never written before 1827,... so... characters might have major OOC-ness... I think I need to read more 1827 materials... orz.
Warnings: M for obvious reasons, OOC-ness(?), not so sure if it's depressing.
Proofread by lovely ShamelessDilettante
A skylark lands on the cherry blossom tree. The bird stretches its wings. Hibari Kyouya watches the cherry blossom petals drift and float in the air, creating a harmonious atmosphere. He touches the bark of the tree, letting his hands rest there. The scent of cherry blossoms here is so overwhelming that it made him crinkles his nose. The pink petals that spread the scent slowly lands on the cool ground, littering the floor pink.
A breeze blows the petals up from the ground, and the petals ascended and descended mystically.
"You've wanted to see this, Tsunayoshi."
Hibari Kyoya lets the petals ascend on to his clothes, breathing in the rich pollen. Everything other than the trees whispering secrets to each other weren't heard.
A petal touches his unclothed skin. Much like Tsunayoshi's touches, it was gentle.
Hibari Kyoya recalls the times they had together, it was less than a year, but it was all it takes to fall in love.
The first time they met, he recalled, it was inside Hibari's room. The disinfectant was lingering in the air, although the room was wide and airy. Fresh roses were placed by the bedside and the white curtains were drawn open. It was morning-a time of new beginning and hope. The birds were chirping outside the window, perched on Hibari's window.
Tsunayoshi was wandering around the hospital compound, retracing back into the steps where he had lost an important item to him. He caught a strong waft of blood. It was common that hospitals smelt of blood and disinfectant, but this time the scent of blood was so strong. Usually, his nose which had been used to these scents wouldn't pick up any traces of it, but now he picked it up. He ignored the scent, trying hard to find the lost object but he ended up following the scent.
Hibari's ward was located at the right wing of the hospital, where people stayed in individual wards and had their personal nurses appointed to each patient.
The man was wide awake, but kept his eyes closed. He was enjoying the silence in contrast to his rampant thoughts. The doctor had told him that he needed a heart transplant by the end of the year, or his heart would cease to stop working.
It was not really the accident's fault. While he was on his motorcycle, someone speeding through the other junction crashed into him. He was considered lucky, to have survived the car accident with only a few broken ribs. However, the metal cardiac pacemaker in his heart was malfunctioning due to the crash. It hit his pacemaker. The doctor estimated that the pacemaker wouldn't last long. He would have to get a heart transplant as soon as possible.
The problem is that there aren't enough people that is eligible enough to donate it, or that they refuse to do so. Hibari understands that it is a selfish world.
As the soft wind caresses his hair, he could feel the soft footsteps of someone walking in the room. The footsteps are too clumsy to be of the graceful family nurse he hired. The wind blows through the open windows again, and the sound of a bell is heard.
"Hie…" Tsunayoshi whispered, toning down his voice.
He bent down to pick the bell beneath Hibari's bed. He had lost the bell when he was visiting the previous patient in this room. To his dismay, his clumsy fingers made the bell move further away from his fingers, further to the left. The bell shook, and the bell rung again.
Hibari was getting irritated.
Just when his fingers clutch the end of the string of the bells, the bells rang again due to him dragging them on the floor. The man lying on his bed had already prepared his tonfas, ready to strike. A rustle in the bed jolts Tsunayoshi, while Hibari threw his tonfa at him with a huge force, despite of his injury.
The tonfa almost hit him, but it blocked the way to the exit. Tsunayoshi bent down to escape, but was caught by Hibari.
"Herbivore…" Hibari whispered.
"HIEE! I'm sorry!" The brunet shrieked in horror. He didn't want to be maimed. Hibari glared at him.
"Scram or I'll bite you to death."
Hibari, still in his bed, sat up with eyes open. The brunet nodded slowly, retreating.
"Hope you recover soon!" Tsunayoshi muttered. Hibari narrowed his eyes and got ready to throw another tonfa if the brunet is still in the room. He left without further ado.
Hibari shuts his eyes back, contemplating about the words the brunet had just said. Hope you recover soon? He's not going to recover. He was sure about that, at that point of time, that nothing, no one would save him.
He hated feeling helpless. He wasn't wallowing in despair. So he made his decision-even if he had to die, he would continue working as a police officer. He'd serve until the day he dies.
At that moment, he decided he detested the brunet.
That herbivore needed to be bitten to death, before Hibari dies.
Hibari watched the white curtains flutter in the wind the children running around in the garden by the hospital without a care in the world. Indeed, some of them don't have much to live, yet they are enjoying their life to the fullest. He watched from afar as the brown fluff he hates so much running around outside, playing with the children. Was that his job?
No-he was wearing a patient's hospital wear. Hibari briefly wondered about what got the herbivore into the hospital, but put that thought aside when he heard a familiar 'hiee' sound.
The man strolled to the window, pushing aside the annoying curtains that were in the way.
The brunet was chasing the children, who were screaming and yelping in joy. It was a disturbance to his sleep, but he didn't have the will to stop the activity.
That brat's cheerful, smiling face was one he could never forget. To think, Hibari must have understood that his illness was a minor one, and he might be leaving the hospital anytime soon. That was what had prompted him to play with the kids, Hibari concluded.
Just as he was tempted to throw his tonfa, who he had picked up on his bed to the brunet, he stopped. What they were doing was disrupting the peace and quietness, but those kids, he recognized from what the nurse had said and pointed out yesterday when they were chatting, had cancer and didn't have much time to live.
He'll spare that boy for now.
The clouds were into different shapes today, mostly puffy, in the sunny baby blue sky. Hibari tied the annoying curtains together to keep them from moving. Now he had a view of the clear, azure blue sky.
He felt an irregular jump of his heartbeat. His heart is starting to deteriorate, a silent fact that he was aware of, but chose not to alarm the doctors about, because they could do nothing.
He let the warm rays of the sun splay on his face, and silently fell asleep.
The birds were chirping and the pond was filled with life. The ex-police officer was sure that they built the garden in such a way to cheer the patients up, especially those who were on their brink of death. Whether they was mocking them, or letting them experience more beauties of the nature he was not sure, but he was sure that he loathed it all. While he enjoyed having pets at home, all of them were given away, not a single one was left.
He couldn't keep them in the hospital, since it was against the rules, but Hibari didn't listen to rules. His older brother, Alaude had given all of them away, even his favourite canary.
He does not blame his brother for it; instead he blames it on himself. He was born this way, needing a pacemaker to keep his heart beating regularly. It has been his dream to be an outstanding police officer from young, but it appears that the dream wouldn't be living for long.
He sits by the bench beside the pond, where dragonflies and water lilies occupies it. Staring at his pale reflection from the pond, he noticed that he looked much worse than before. The police squad had refused to put Hibari on duty when they found out his condition. Since Hibari's pride didn't allow him to beg, he did nothing but silently accepted it.
Of course, he had wanted to be discharged so he could enforce the law like a vigilante, but his older brother had make extra sure that he remained in hospital.
Now, left with no options, he could only wait for his death in this hopeless place. He dreaded the hospital-partly because there were 2 sides to it, one happy when parents rejoiced over the birth of their babies, the other sad when people mourn over their beloveds. He hated anything that had double edges, he hated the coin. He at least, made sure he was true to himself by sticking to his principals-everyone was to be treated equally with the same attitude from him.
The brunet was sleeping at the bench opposite from him, which was still facing the pond. Hibari had his tonfas ready this time. He was almost ready to strike when the brunet jolted up from…a bad dream?
Then the boy spotted Hibari, cue the immediate signature shriek.
Hibari almost hit the boy's face to shut him up. When he quietened, Hibari nodded. When the man was about to bite the brunet to death, he noticed that a bird landed on his head. He petted the bird, before letting it go. The bird flocked its grey feathers into the air.
"Bye bye, birdy…" the brunet whispered.
Hibari was about to speak, but the brunet interrupted him.
"That bird was injured the other day… The children and I nursed it back to health, and sent it back flying." Tsuna mused, lost deep in his thoughts and recollecting the memories of that time.
Hibari lowered his tonfas down, the built-up rush of hatred he had of Tsuna vanished. So the other herbivores still have uses…
Tsuna continue to prattle on about stories of the grey bird. Hibari listened but pretended to be asleep on the bench. Since the bench was long, Hibari sat on the right end of the bench, while Tsuna sat on the left end of the bench.
The boy's soft voice continued to recite his memories, almost as if lost in his own world. The ex-police officer knows that anyone normal wouldn't be excited with saving an herbivorous bird, yet his motions and actions were almost child-like, vividly describing each time they had spent with the bird. This is the first time Hibari had seen a smile so innocent.
Hibari Kyouya took occasional peeks at the other boy. When the boy was finished, he saw Hibari's pretending to sleep face. Quietly, he places the blanket on his laps to cover the man's body. Hibari tried very hard not to move or flinch when the boy's gentle hands almost touched his skin. Once he covered the man, he tip-toed away, whispering and gesticulating to all the people around there to remain silent, not to disturb the man's slept.
Maybe the brunet wasn't so bad after all, Hibari decided. He at least knows when the man wanted to have some peace, and knows how to respect silence. He vaguely wondered where the child-like innocence from, since the petite brunet looked around 15 to 16. Someone of that age nowadays would be wilder, maybe, not soft and gentle like him. Hibari tuned out his thoughts.
For now, he needed rest.
The next time he met Tsuna, it was the start of summer. Some of the kids he saw that was playing with the boy had been discharged. One of the boy's playmates was waving to Tsuna as he left the hospital gates with his parents. Hibari knew he wouldn't have that chance to leave here again, but he was quite surprised the brunet had been already here for a month. He looked fine enough to be discharged, and he didn't appear like he had any mental illnesses, so why?
He could see a sincere smile plastered up the brunet's face as he waved to the kid. Wouldn't the brunet be frustrated?
Once the kid was gone, Tsuna continued smiling and went to dance around with the other children. They were all discussing about participating a cultural festival that took place annually in Namimori. They would have that and the summer festival celebrations. That was the only time they were allowed to leave the hospital.
Hibari listened to the bubbly conversation as he was taking his medicine from the pharmacy. Since he didn't want the nurse to meddle with his medicine and the amount he should consume, he had requested to the doctor that he wanted to do it himself. It was also a sign of proof that his body is still running, he doesn't need nurses who are acting like maids in his home to serve him.
He resisted the urge to tonfa the kids whenever they're making lots of noise.
Whenever Hibari's around, they'd lower their voices almost immediately. The kids later dragged Tsuna away from the waiting area of the pharmacy. They were just afraid of Hibari.
Tsuna gave Hibari a slight nod of acknowledgement of his presence and stalked out with the kids, whispering to them in hushed tones. Hibari collected his medicine, sending a death glare to him. The group scuttled away rapidly under his sight.
Now, there's finally some peace and quiet in the area.
Hibari Kyoya hated the boy after all.
It was at night, where the stars were shining brightly in the clear navy blue sky. Hibari had a bird's eye view from his room. It was times like this he wished he didn't have time to admire the stars. He wanted to be out at the night, prowling around nabbing criminals, keeping peace in the city… which would not be his job now.
From a top, he can see a clear view of the entire city. The city lights danced through the glass, creating duplicates of dotted yellow, dusting the entire city. Hibari could already feel the adrenaline running through his veins, pulsing through his body. At such a night like this, the him a year ago would be arresting drug dealers.
He could almost feel that sensation that he had last year, that satisfaction. Now, he had nothing.
Now, he was just sitting at his bedside in his unlit room. A knock on his room almost made him knock that glass of water on his table. He placed the glass on the table properly, before answering to the door.
"Which herbivore out there dare disturb me?" Hibari questioned, eyes already glaring beams at the door. A silent brush and squeak caused the ex-police officer to identify the suspect. It was the brunet.
"H-H-hibari-san!" The brunet shrieked as a tonfa almost slammed into his forehead.
The ex-police officer had deduced that the boy had probably learnt his name when he picked up Hibari's medicine at the pharmacy when he dropped it on the ground one day. His hands were already going weak…
"Speak quickly, or I'll bite you to death." Hibari uttered, narrowing his eyes at the brunet.
"I…I… just wanted to talk to you." Tsuna muttered; hands behind his back.
The man raised his brow at his words. Even at work, no one willingly volunteered to speak to him. Hibari waited for him to speak, but no response came out from him. He was getting increasingly irritated by this silence.
Tsuna jolted as his words, scrambling to remember the lines and excuses he thought of.
"I just thought that you'd… be lonely." The brunet murmured, with quiet steps, he walked to Hibari's bedside.
Hibari then gave him his signature death glare.
"What makes you think I'm lonely?" Hibari inputted shortly after he said that.
Hibari was always a loner; he chose to work alone, plainly because he thought that others would only drag him down in work. Regardless of the situation or place, he would always choose to be alone. It goes without saying that his brother preferred to be alone as well, instead of entertaining to other's whims and desires.
"…Nothing… I just see that you're always alone…and I thought…" Tsuna let his words drift.
Hibari understood what he meant.
"No. Leave." Hibari made out his words curtly.
Tsuna was hesitant to leave. It felt like he still had something else to say, before leaving, but he left anyway, leaving Hibari to the darkness of the room.
Hibari closes his eyes and let the darkness of the room consume him, as his mind drifted back to the past events that he wished so hard to go back to. Tsuna closed the door quietly. Once the door was shut, the brunet stood outside of the door, unmoving.
Hibari was aware of that, but chose to say nothing about it.
He allowed the boy to accompany him just for once, since he's not disturbing him. The quiet city lights were all drowned out by his eyes, as he went into his dreamland.
It's a place where Hibari calls the shots for his body. Ignoring the heart pain and irregular beating of his heart, he shifted in bed and closed his eyes. No, he will not report to the doctor about it.
He still wasn't sure if he really loathed the brunet. It was confusing, but Hibari lets it slide. He just didn't want to have too much on his mind right now. In a way, the brunet was there as a distraction, so he doesn't sink too much in the past.
He supposed he should thank him, but no words slipped out of his mouth.
It was at night, where the stars weren't raiding the sky. He spotted Tsunayoshi easily in the festival. Hibari had been sitting on the top of a secluded hill, which would later have a clear view of the fireworks.
Hibari didn't particularly liked fireworks since they were noisy and loud, so for all his life, he had never seen them, and had always avoided them like plague. This time was different, he convinced himself that he had to see what was so special about them, what made the herbivores so attracted to that annoyance flare.
He had his body leaning on a big tree, whilst sitting on the grass patch. The brunet was there in clear sight, wandering around the whole festival. It was then that he found it weird for him not to be discharged after 2 months without any operation or medicine. He was just there at the hospital. The next moment he completely lost sight of that spiky brown hair. Hibari reasoned that he had no reason to see what that brunet was doing anyway, so he shut his eyes, impatiently waiting for the fireworks.
A rustle in the nearby shrubs and bushes put Hibari on alert immediately. He slashed the shrub with his tonfas. A familiar shriek was heard. Hibari deduced that it was Tsuna.
"Hibari-san!" Tsuna called, rubbing the sore spot on the forehead Hibari had hit him.
Hibari glared at him again. It was that brown haired herbivore. It was that herbivore again. He thought he should not have spared him.
"C-Could I… sit here? I have been coming here to see the fireworks since I was young. The only event every year that I'd look forward to is watching the brilliant burst of fireworks… there isn't anything interesting in my life…" Tsuna trailed off.
Hibari Kyoya stared at the brunet. He didn't hint the brunet to sit, but the brunet went to the opposite side of Hibari, settling down quietly.
Hibari Kyoya pretended not to notice; as the brunet leaned on to the same tree Hibari leaned on to. Someone broadcasted that the fireworks were going to start.
"Hibari-san… Do you like fireworks?"
His reply was a curt and short one.
The boy tilted his head. He suppressed a laugh. The boy had learnt that Hibari was weird that way. He hates doing something, yet he does it. How controversial.
"I like fireworks… they're really pretty, bright and try to make their mark in the skies…in their short lifespan…" Tsuna whispered, just when the first burst of fireworks were set off in the sky.
The bright red light spread itself out, and then dispersed, splitting into all different directions. Just as they thought the ray of light was about to reach them, it disappeared, vanished into the thin air. Not even lingering heat of the light was left behind. It was a short, fugacious shot of fire.
Another firework with green rays of light replaced it soon after that, followed by consecutive fireworks. Hibari didn't understand. Once its brilliance and illumining light was all gone, no one would remember it. It would only be carved into people's heart at that very fleeting moment. Then all traces of it would be gone. The dark sky wasn't so dark now.
It reminded Hibari that people once used to respect him when he had that job.
Hibari didn't understand the teen that could laugh and smile at the pathetic fireworks.
"Herbivore…Wipe that smile off your face or I'll bite you to death for being an annoyance." Hibari muttered.
"E-Eh? How…how did you know I was smiling?"
Hibari wasn't facing him, so Tsuna was surprised that Hibari knew he was smiling, since they were sitting opposite to each other. The man ignored his sentence.
"H-Hibari-san… I do have a name you know…" the brunet murmured.
"Sawada Tsunayoshi." Hibari stated.
"H-How did you know my name…?"
His heart skipped a beat.
Hibari stood up and dusted his legs. He had planned to leave after the fireworks show was over. That question was left unanswered to the boy. He had asked the nurse about the patient who had always played with the kids. The nurse told him his name after some pondering. It was strange; the nurse seemed to take a very long time to remember his name.
The man returned to the hospital soon afterwards.
He missed his canary. That bright yellow puffball that always sang him Namimori's middle school song to keep him entertained. Hibari briefly wondered about the canary, as he spots the brunet and the other kids planting sunflowers in the garden.
If he had to compare between his family members or his pets, he'd prefer his pets. His pets wouldn't be as noisy as humans. To put it plainly, he despised being around humans in their ugly nature. Although he is one too, he refuses to be known as one.
Hence, the names he calls some people by, "Carnivore", "Omnivore" and "Herbivore."
If someone is not categorized under the 3, they are not deemed worthy as animals to him, they are nothing in his eyes then.
The rest of the kids then hurried to their own rooms when they heard its dinner time. Only the brunet stayed behind, watering the sunflowers and fertilizing it. Hibari went down to get some fresh air after dinner.
The brunet was still there, caring for the flowers. The man didn't understand his dedication.
The sun had already sunk into the horizon. He stood behind the boy, silently watching the boy talk to the plants while he finishes caring for the plants. The brunet was caught off guard when he turned behind. It was someone he least expected.
Hibari sat down on the bench. Tsuna nodded to him slightly and continued his work. Hibari wasn't sure why he found what the boy doing interesting. He must have been too bored staying in this cage that he resorts to watching a boy caring for his plants.
That's the only reason he could think of, except solitude.
Summer went by with him occasionally talking to the brunet from time to time. Their talks were always very short and don't consist of any interesting things. It was just their casual talk, which consists of Hibari's biting to death and Tsuna's 'HIIE'.
Soon it was autumn, a season where red and orange maple leaves flooding the floor and the sceneries. The first sign of autumn started one leaves started to fall in huge amounts. They turned from green to yellow, then finally red.
It was ageing, but it was ageing far more beautiful than human's ageing process. They were ephemeral but they were beautiful. Hibari briefly wondered if his life holds such an essence.
The man carried a Japanese styled parasol when he was going to the hospital's garden for a walk. It was a red parasol with the koi fish design on it. He opened the parasol to shield himself from the falling maple leaves from the maple trees. This hospital had a surprisingly huge garden. Originally this hospital used to be a manor, but after it was demolished the owner of the manor built a hospital.
Thousands of red, yellow and orange leaf flutters up as the breeze lifts them. This was a secluded part of the hospital, where not many people knew. Hibari had explored most of the hospital due to him being too bored in his room. It was at summer where he found the place.
The leaves and grass were green back then, unlike now.
Soon after this everything would be white and die out. Just like his life. He was sure he couldn't last another year. This would be the last year.
Hibari sat down at one of the spots not cluttered by the maple leaves.
Tsuna was quietly following Hibari, he noticed.
Tsuna had brought a drawing pad, paint and paint brushes with him. He sat down at the opposite side to Hibari, taking in the various surroundings and displaying it on paint.
Hibari pretended to sleep while Tsuna painted an image of the surroundings. The scent of freshly wilted leaves, the sight as the sunlight filtered through all the surrounding leaves, the rough touch of the tree's bark…
He painted Hibari's long lashes, white skin and beautiful hair.
Tsuna had always wanted to be an artist. Tsuna had told Hibari before. It was an aspiration of his since he was young.
Surprisingly, the man didn't find Tsuna that irritating. In some way, Hibari had accepted the fact that he was just there whenever Hibari feels lonely.
Hibari felt his heart skip a beat.
It was mid-autumn now. Hibari finds Tsuna's company endearing. He would anticipate the brunet's arrival to his room every day now, but he does not expresses it in his face. He'd let the boy shave the apples that the nurse placed on his table every time, and let the boy cut it into pieces for him.
Today as usual Tsuna was peeling Hibari's apples.
It was through so many times of just staring at Tsunayoshi did he only realize that Tsunayoshi had white skin and smooth supple skins that made his hands feel itchy to touch.
Hibari felt that he was starting to rely on the boy. Every single day, he found the boy inclining to come over to visit. Every single day, Tsuna would bring his canvas over to show Hibari, or they will discuss over mundane subjects, like the weather and stuff.
He finds the days he spent with the brunet flying over-something that occurs so fast, but not exactly in the blink of an eye. The brunet had given him many murals from his collection, but none of them were what he painted or drew when he was in Hibari's ward.
Tsunayoshi never permits Hibari to view what he's drawing in his ward. Hibari respected that and never peeks at his art, although he does get curious sometimes.
So one day when Tsunayoshi went to the bathroom, that piece of drawing on his clipboard flew on to the floor due to the breeze. Without hesitation the man picked that article up. He didn't mean to see what Tsunayoshi was drawing.
It was a detailed diagram or rather, picture of a human heart, with all the veins and such. It was in black and white because all Tsuna had brought today was only a pencil. Hibari's hands reached for his chest, where his heart is still beating.
He had never told the brunet about his condition, and never had he hinted it. He had been careful about speaking this matter. He rarely talks; it was the boy doing all the talking most of the time. The door to the restroom swung open.
Hibari stared at the one returning from the bathroom and narrowed his eyes.
"Why did you draw a heart?" Hibari questioned, scrutinizing the every detail on the picture.
Tsuna appeared stunned, and then he collected himself and came to Hibari's side.
"…No reason." Tsunayoshi was at a lost at his words now, unsure of how to reason the drawing.
It must be because he was caught red-handed. Hibari didn't need pity. He didn't need comfort. Instantly he had regretted he had sought refuge in the teen by allowing him to sit by his side, to listen to him rant so that he can forget everything about his life fading into nothingness.
To forget that his dreams were dashed, he'll never have that chance of living it again. The only comfort that Tsunayoshi gave him was that Tsunayoshi had never had the chance to live life as an artist. All he did was to paint, draw, sketch, but he never had the chance to beg people to display his works, or to sell his works out so that people could appreciate it.
The very purpose of his art was like music to people ears, as to like flowers to people's eyes. The combination of sharp ends and curved ends or colours beside colours as they stand side by side by each other to create a beautiful artwork, was what Tsunayoshi's art is all about.
Hibari finds nothing too fascinating about it because he doesn't know how to appreciate art.
The only comfort he got from Tsunayoshi, was that some people had never lived their dream, he should be contented with this.
He felt ugly feeling like this, it was like stomping on people's happiness.
Hibari didn't mull much on this though; he wasn't like him to mull much on anything. He needed his afternoon nap so much now, he just wants to forget everything and let his mind sleep.
Darkness…the only place where he could escape to…
It was a safe haven for him.
"Get out." The ex-police officer stated. Tsuna jolted; eyes a little watery. He must have hurt the boy with his words.
Hibari refused to return the drawing back to Tsunayoshi after many requests. He left Hibari's ward soon after that.
A heart… for him?
Autumn was relatively short this year. On the last few days of autumn, there were still no willing donors willing to donate a heart to him. Tsunayoshi had told him almost every day about how someone would definitely come to his rescue. He just had to be patient and wait.
"Would you like to draw, Hibari-san?" Tsuna questioned one day out of the blue, when he noticed the man always staring at him when he's drawing.
Today Tsunayoshi had brought with him 36 colour pencils of different shades and colours, a drawing block and a few pencils.
Tsunayoshi hands Hibari the stationaries, after prattling to him how expensive they are and how to treat his stationaries with care. Tsunayoshi is afraid because Hibari tends to be violent around the things and people he doesn't like, whilst he treats the things he likes with care… but still… Hibari doesn't seem to be that fond of art.
A piece of white A3 sized paper was placed in front of him. Hibari had no idea of what to draw. He was skilled in calligraphy, but definitely not drawing.
He took up a 2B pencil and started to follow what Tsunayoshi was doing the last time he saw him drawing-sketching.
Although it appeared to be some strange weird doodling, Tsunayoshi praised him. Hibari crushed it out and threw out of the window, without a care that it'd hit someone on the ground floor. Soon after many failed drawings, Hibari finds Tsunayoshi guiding his hands to draw the sunflowers he planted in the summer.
At first Tsuna was hesitant about guiding Hibari's hands, so his hands were hovering over Hibari's unsure of how to guide him. Later on the man grabbed the brunet's soft hands after much impatience to tell him it's alright.
Their faces were so close at that time, Hibari thought that their noses were about to touch. This is the first time he noticed that Tsunayoshi has pink, kissable lips. Those types of lips that were like cushions, ready to be sat on, in this case, kissed any time. He raised a brow, but while Tsunayoshi was busy guiding his hands, he pressed their lips together.
Tsunayoshi gasped, what he never expected to happened had happened.
Hibari Kyoya was kissing Sawada Tsunayoshi.
It wasn't as if Hibari was a bad kisser, and it wasn't as if he hadn't kissed someone before. There was someone, when his mother brings a girl back to their home for matchmaking purposes. Both he and his brother despised those sessions especially when the female couldn't shut her trap so they bit the girl to death.
The girl had practically forced herself on to him.
It was such a bad experience, he didn't want to think about it, but he supposed, with Tsunayoshi it was different.
It wasn't about being straight or gay. It was purely just because Hibari Kyoya had liked the person enough to deem him worthy of kissing. That was all there was to it.
Tsunayoshi closes his eye when he realized what the man was trying to execute on to his virgin lips. He had seen from multiple art films about this, he shouldn't be worried about it. He didn't want to ruin the moment.
Hibari could feel his heart rate accelerating at a constant pace. Being with the brunet made him feel that all the time, whenever he saw the brunet, it was like euphoria had hit him, but he doesn't show it, of course.
He slipped a tongue inside Tsuna's mouth, and ravelled his tongue around his so he could taste it. He sucked and nibbled Tsunayoshi's lower lip, to arouse a soft moan from him.
The teen tasted like tangerines they just had this afternoon before Tsuna suggested about drawing. Although his hands had gotten weaker, he still could grab hold of Tsunayoshi's head and pushed him closer for him to hold. He tipped Tsunayoshi's chin so he could get a more proper angle.
Tsunayoshi pressed his lips to Hibari's gently, as if almost afraid that he'd break.
As Hibari got more aggressive, Tsuna opened his mouth wider to accommodate both their tongues inside. Their tongues were dancing along as Hibari took the lead.
Tsunayoshi pushed Hibari away when he felt Hibari's hands snaking around his waist. They were supposed to be drawing, not kissing!
The brunet released his hands from Hibari's hands.
He was panting, a little breathless. Tsuna pursed his lips. What was that?
Hibari picked up the pencil he dropped when they were kissing and continued to draw, like nothing had happened.
The rest of the day went on with neither of them talking to each other. It was really awkward, Tsuna didn't dare to gaze or glance at Hibari after that. He just hid in his papers, pretending to be engrossed in drawing.
The man knew it, but both of them said nothing. Hibari did nothing to dispense the awkward silence.
At the end of autumn, it was always raining. The dark clouds were always looming in the skies, covering the sun. The soft pitter-patter would drown out all sounds of the shuffling of feet of the people who were travelling outside, the chirping of the birds and everything else.
Hibari liked the rain because once it's raining; the children living in the hospital wouldn't create a fuss. They wouldn't run around outside yelling and screaming. Hibari Kyoya had found himself despising kids.
They were just a noisy bunch of kids that hadn't hit adolescence. Once they hit it, he was sure they'd suffer in remorse and regret of what they did in the past. So he tried to ignore them most of the time, but since they were disrupting the peace, measures must be taken.
However, Tsunayoshi was constantly hovering and protecting the kids, so he was (sometimes) taken down together with them.
A year was going to past now, one more season left-winter.
Hibari had already lost hope of being able to see the summer next year.
Tsunayoshi had fallen asleep drawing something. Hibari removed the drawing pad from his hands.
He brushed off the locks of hair that had fallen out of place so that he could have a clear look of his face. Tsunayoshi was now leaning on his shoulders, fast asleep.
He could feel his heartbeat accelerate, even just by a little.
What was that boy doing to him? Grimly he flipped the pages of Tsunayoshi's drawing pad… and realized all of the pictures Tsunayoshi had drawn are all of him.
Suddenly, he finds that he doesn't know much about the brunet, except that he's a patient in this hospital. He had to find out more about Tsunayoshi.
Winter came quickly. Every day was either rain or snow now. Hibari was getting sick of the repetitive weather. It was always grey or white. Hibari could feel the life sapping out of him. His heart was jumping irregularly now; occasionally there were times when he thought he was just about to past away.
It was finally on that day that he found out why Tsunayoshi was still in hospital after so many years.
"I have a terminal disease, Hibari-san." Tsunayoshi stated, putting his pencil down on the table calmly.
They were at the park where the current bark of the maple tree was still there. Both of them breathed out puffs of hot breath. Their breath would condense on their warm hands if they were to place their hands close to their mouth.
Tsunayoshi laughed it off like it was nothing.
Hibari Kyoya was speechless. What was he supposed to say? He didn't have superpowers nor was he a miracle doctor like some black jack. They only existed in shows where people deceive themselves that there's such a guy who would bring people back to life because they're kind.
It is not possible in reality.
"It is a miracle that I am able to live so long," Tsuna continued, playing with the snowflakes on his hand.
"Thank you, Hibari-san. I'm glad I have met you." Tsuna muttered, blushing.
"Without Hibari-san I'd be lonely, I would still be playing with children, watching them leave one by one out of the hospital, watching them get healthy while I wither to death… but now that Hibari-san's here, I'm not so lonely anymore."
Tsunayoshi smiled, as he twirled around with the snow. Eventually he built a snowman and an igloo all by himself. Hibari just stood there, watching the boy play around with the snow.
To put it simply, they were just 2 men waiting for their deaths. Now that Tsunayoshi didn't have to die alone, he felt less lonely, because there's a friend who's departing with him, how ironic.
When a snowball was threw right into his face because he was too deep in thought about what Tsunayoshi was saying, Hibari got his tonfas and hit his head with it.
"Do you have a death wish?"
He didn't care if Tsunayoshi had a concussion later on.
It was at the freezing cold days, did Hibari's heart finally failed to work. The doctor had lied to him. A year hadn't even passed and he's in critical condition now. His pacemaker had almost stopped working.
There were still no donors available yet.
Tsunayoshi rests his head at Hibari's bedside in the ICU ward. Tsunayoshi's placed his cold hands on top of Hibari's cold hand. Tsunayoshi had folded 477 cranes now. He still had to fold a lot more cranes to hope for Hibari's speedy recovery, if there is ever one.
Tsunayoshi doesn't know why the people in the past carried down the tradition of folding cranes, because he knows deep down in his heart that folding cranes would never work. It had never once worked because he had already folded for plenty of kids but they still passed on.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
Tsunayoshi felt assured with that sound. Hibari mustn't go.
If heaven wouldn't want to save Hibari, then what can Tsunayoshi do? Nothing, except to offer Hibari his life…
That was what formed in Tsunayoshi's mind.
He was dying soon anyway, all he could do for Hibari was to act before his cancer cells had struck his heart. He hoped that his heart would be fitting for Hibari.
With that in mind, he hurried over to Hibari's doctor.
Hibari must live on, for the sake of Tsunayoshi.
That was because Tsunayoshi wanted to see how suave Hibari was as a police officer, living his very dream like what he had heard from the others. Deep down in his heart, he wanted to be selfish.
He didn't want to save Hibari, but he knew he had to do the right thing.
He had lost count of how many times he had berated himself for being such a bad friend…or lover, if that was considered what they were. He imagined countless times of what they'd be like if they weren't having any health problems.
Tsunayoshi would sell his art and Hibari would nab criminals to keep the society en règle. They'd meet when both of them are free and lead a normal life.
Life just doesn't works that way. It plays around with you until it gets sick of you and throws you away. Tsunayoshi just wasn't going to let life fool with them.
It was at the dead of the winter night, that Hibari dream about Tsunayoshi.
It was snowing heavily outside, heaps and heaps of snow piling above each other. The height of the snow was about the height of a 2-year old kid.
Tsunayoshi stood by Hibari's bed, big doe eyes looking at Hibari, who had just entered the dream.
Tsunayoshi was in his hospital gown that he had always worn. He climbed up the bed, lying on Hibari's chest.
Ba-thump. Ba-thump. Ba-thump.
For the first time in Hibari's life, he felt alive. They were in Hibari's hospital ward, where they first met. Tsunayoshi inched closer for a kiss.
It was a simple chaste kiss, which then Hibari inclined his neck to kiss the brunet. The brunet tasted of tangerines and the sun, like what he'd expected of him to. Tsuna was now lying on top of Hibari, with Hibari straddling on him.
The chaste kiss turned into a heated one soon, with their tongues lapping over each other.
They broke the kiss after a few minutes. Both of them were panting. Hibari licked the length of Tsuna neck after recovering from that fervent kiss. A shiver ran down the brunet's spine.
Tsunayoshi blushed. It was a nice shade of red, in contrast to his skin.
Hibari had never once thought about bedding the brunet, but since the brunet made it this way, he might as well go along with it. He had dreamt about touching the smooth skin of his once and only once, but he never expected it to come true.
Whatever the case, it came true so he isn't going to deny Tsuna.
He felt that something was left out and forgotten, something very important, but at that moment it really didn't matter.
He trailed bite marks all over the brunet's neck. He gasped softly when Hibari did that. Tsunayoshi snaked his hands around Hibari's neck for better support. He felt possessive suddenly, as if the brunet was only his and no one else. Although there isn't a love rival or someone obstructing their relationship, he felt it was necessary to place some bite marks.
He bit at the skin hard enough so that blood was trickling down Tsunayoshi's neck. Sucking the spot where he bit, he knew the ruptured blood vessel would leave a scar.
Tsunayoshi moaned at the sensation, hands snaking tighter at his neck.
They were in a hurry to take off his hospital gown. It came off just when they pull it over his head. That was all the piece of fabric had. Tsunayoshi also had worn a pair of boxers, but that was all.
He felt his hands tracing the skinny body outline of Tsunayoshi. He was just bones, not much of fat or muscle. Hibari didn't mind.
He brushed his hands over all of Tsunayoshi's pale skin. It was a skin colour too white to be healthy, but Hibari didn't mind that too.
He felt Tsunayoshi's soft feathered hair, it was really as soft and fluffy as he imagined. He didn't have much of a chance to touch Tsunayoshi's body. Before he'd just shun and shy away. Once his hands were done exploring, they settled on one of Tsunayoshi's perky buds that were already hard in the freezing cold weather.
Pinching it, his hands moved to Tsunayoshi's back to support him.
Hibari pressed their lips for another kiss again, a fervent desire to keep more of their bodies touching. More moans were elicited when Hibari pressed that nipple and rub it against his fingers. He did the same with the other nipple with his hands once he's done with the left one.
Hibari swallowed all of Tsuna's moans by not breaking the kiss.
Hibari rubs their body in such a way that both their rears were touching and rubbing. Tsuna mewled when they broke the kiss, hands feebly moving to unbutton Hibari's clothes. Hibari had never once wore any hospital clothes unless necessary. He did it so to as to not remind himself of the fact that he's in the hospital. He wants to think himself as a person who could still nab criminals, when he could not.
Hibari pulled down Tsunayoshi's checker-ed boxers down. Tsunayoshi blushed in embarrassment, pulling the boxers back up.
Regardless, Hibari swept Tsuna's hands away and pulled it down all the way. He threw the boxers on the floor together with the hospital gown. Tsuna was then finally done with unbuttoning Hibari's shirt. Tsunayoshi's eyes were already half-lidded, almost lost in the sensations of what they were doing.
Hibari's clothes too, were thrown into that pile.
Hibari felt his feelings for Tsunayoshi blooming like wildflowers in his heart, falling deeper and deeper for Tsunayoshi. What he had never planned was to fall for someone over a short span of 10 months. He had never expected that, nor would he want that in the past, but right now…
Hibari's fingers stroked Tsuna's cock, rubbing and squeezing it so that there would be sweet friction.
"D-Don't…ah stop… Hibari-san!"
Hibari continued that until he felt that the brunet was aroused enough. Slipping his fingers into that warm, tight hole, he could feel Tsuna tensing and whimpering in pain.
Tsuna began to relax his shoulders and calm down after Hibari's words. Once Tsunayoshi adapted well to that first finger, he intruded a second one in, this time brushing through places to find that sweet spot.
It had only caused stings of gasps and pains when he moved around. Not wanting to hurt Tsunayoshi too much, Hibari left his fingers there for some time while he removed his hand from Tsunayoshi's back to stroke his cock.
When Tsunayoshi had adapted to it, a third finger was sent in. This time it lightly brushed on his prostate. Tsuna felt a spasm of pleasure and pain from the brush, immediately trembling one he brushed against that spot.
After this, Hibari continued to shove his fingers deliberately on that spot. Tsuna had already lost count of the many times he moaned shamelessly, his will already disappearing. Once it was done, he parted Tsunayoshi's legs.
He unzipped his pants and slammed into Tsunayoshi. Tsunayoshi was brought back to earth by the overwhelming pain throbbing in his system, skin and back.
"Hibari-san… s-stop… it hurts," The brunet whispered. He arched his body, writhing in the extreme pain. His hands dug in the bed sheets, digging into them.
The man gave him some time to adjust to this. Tsunayoshi nodded when the pain subdued. He moved a little, allowing Tsunayoshi to adjust to this.
He tried positioning himself in different angles and finally, he hit Tsuna's prostate again.
Tsuna cried out in pleasure and pain. After a few more thrusts, Tsunayoshi came-white spilled all over their bodies. Some of them dripped on to Hibari's pants, but he didn't really mind.
The brunet was going to pass out anytime soon, but Hibari wouldn't allow that. Now he had his hands around the brunet to keep him from passing out whilst he slams into him repetitively.
Hibari continued his thrusts until he climaxed. Tsunayoshi moaned when Hibari climaxed, or whenever he brushed that sweet spot.
Hibari pulled out from him, leaving Tsunayoshi in sweat and a sticky mess. They shared a simple chaste kiss before both of them collapsed on his bed.
His bed creaked. Hibari knew he liked Tsunayoshi more than he knows, but he chose not to say anything about it.
A few moments of rare silence without panting, moans or the creaking of the bed was shared between them.
"Hibari-san…Thank you. I loved you."
He lie down on Hibari's chest, listening to the soft heartbeat of Hibari.
"Live my dream for me, Hibari-san. I want you to see the Sakura outside of these white hospital walls of misery…I'll be always be here with you."
"Goodbye, Hibari-san." Tsunayoshi whispered.
He let out one last breath before his whole body disintegrated in sakura. This was Tsunayoshi's last gift towards Hibari Kyoya.
Hibari Kyoya snapped his eyes open. He was still alive… how…? It felt as if he was suddenly wrenched out of the dream world, dropping down from the heavens, back to earth. There was no sight of the brunet. A thousand cranes were hung up in this room, however, with a piece of painting on Hibari's table.
"May you see the Sakura blooming out in the spring and lead a wonderful life."
Immediately his hands moved towards his heart. His chest is wrapped thickly with bandages. His heart was beating normally. It didn't feel like he had his pacemaker in.
Then it dawned upon him.
'Live for me, Hibari-san'
That came like a whisper, right into his ears. Tsunayoshi? Hibari felt no presence of any person in the room. Was he hallucinating? Speaking of which, where was Tsunayoshi?
Hibari Kyoya refused to believe the fact that Tsunayoshi donated his heart to him.
Although now, Tsunayoshi had become a part of him-a heart shared with Tsunayoshi and him. Now he linked the pieces together, everything had made sense.
Tsunayoshi sacrificed himself for Hibari Kyoya.
Hibari Kyoya now sits under the shade of the Sakura tree. He had been resuming his job for almost a month now. He had been living exactly the way as Tsunayoshi would have wanted him to.
He even draws at home now, picking up one of the things he would never do before, however, all he draws are paintings of the cherry blossom, and nothing else, as a tribute to Tsunayoshi, to honour his death.
Tsunayoshi was buried in his family grave, when he found out he was an orphan. Tsunayoshi would be his to keep; even in death shall they not part. If he shall die, he shall accompany Tsunayoshi to the very same soil.
Hibari would see Tsunayoshi occasionally from time-to-time. He wasn't really afraid of this phenomenon.
Hibari had changed to calling Tsuna 'Tsunayoshi' after that incident. No more herbivorous nickname for him.
"Isn't the Sakura outside prettier, Tsunayoshi?"
When he batted his eyelids, he could see almost a glimpse of the brunet, smiling to him. Tsunayoshi would always be with him, as a part of him now. He placed his hands on his heart.
"I love you, too."
E/N: This is so bad, I'm sorry Kimchi ;A; *dies*
P.S.: Now you get what I mean by BAD?
SD suggests that the girl which kissed Hibari would be Kimchi, so what do you think? (P.S.: Please don't kill me. I want my red packets for chinese new year.)
And Happy Birthday, WhiteAngel128! :D Have the most awesome 1827 birthday ever!
Reviews/Favs would be awesome. Thanks.