Jacob of the Jungle - 1

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Stephanie Meyer. The story is dedicated to Zacty2010 who will beta for this story, and who had the idea of making Jacob become Tarzan !

A/N : Hope you like the story ! It's inspired by the horrible movie called 'George of the Jungle' as you might have guessed. Any and all comments are more than appreciated, they're loved ! Thanks to my Colonel Muse, ZacTy2010 for the idea and beta !


I was in the middle of the rain forest. Utterly lost.

But like totally, completely, desperately lost. My guide and I had had the brilliant idea of taking a canoe each, and a few waves and wind-gusts later, we were separated. And considering how much of a labyrinth this river was, we would NEVER find each other.

Call me defeatist if you want, but I would call it being realistic.

Anyway, storm, waves, thunder. Result: I was stranded somewhere, the canoe gone with everything I had. All I had been able to save was my rucksack with a few essentials... Talk about a leisure trip ! Well, I wasn't exactly here for leisure, but for studying. In theory

Maybe I should present myself at this point. Emmett McCarty, professor of biology at the University of Edinburgh, explorer in his lost hours. To be precise, I am Lord Emmett McCarty, thirty year old lord of the McCarty mansion.

Lost hours. Mmh, that was exactly it; lost. I had taken a whole unpaid year off, deciding to go explore the Amazon, something I had always wanted to do. Move away from all the stupid drama at home with my (now ex-)boyfriend and homophobic family. Breath the free air !

Blah, blah, blah. Point was, I wanted to get away, so I had finally gotten around to using the enormous amounts of money Lord McCarty, my father, had left me. Not that I didn't normally use the money – don't get me wrong. After all, living in the McCarty manor at Edinburgh was expensive to say the least ... But seeing as I owned about a third of the city, and I rented it all out, let's just say I wasn't going to find myself needy anytime soon !

Back to the story. I was stranded – said that.

So yeah, where was I ? Well, that's just the point, not a clue. I took a deep breath and started trudging in a random direction. I wasn't going to get anywhere by standing there gaping all day long !

As Mary Poppins said "Stop gaping, we are not a cod-fish, Michael !"

Well, I stopped gaping and I trotted happily forward. After all, I didn't exactly have anything left to lose !

I walked until sometime in the end of the afternoon. Then, the thing which normally only happens in movies, the storm appeared in a millisecond –or at least it felt like it – and I was drenched. I felt like a character in those fucking cartoons with the single cloud over my head pouring down on me. Fucking perfect. I should have picked the south of France, knew it ! Why didn't I go down to Nice and Porquerolles ? I could've been visiting the perfume factories in Grasse under a blistering sun, in a T-shirt, shorts and flip-flops. But no, obviously, I was in Amazonia cutting my way through the dense forest, my clothes sticking like a second skin, alone and unmotivated.

I walked for what felt like hours. Of course it could have been a whole minute, I had no idea how fast the time was going, I had no watch. Something I convinced myself to leave back at the manor.

I arrived at a clearing, which was more or less protected from the rain by a gigantic tree. I slumped to the ground, used my rucksack as pillow, and let Morpheus' arms take me.


I woke up groggy. Something was off. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and rested on my elbows. What the –

I was in a bed ?!

I looked around. I seemed to be on some kind of a bed, in some kind of a giant inhabited tree...

And freaked out. I yelped and tumbled out of bed, there was someone right behind !

When I recovered my sense I realized there didn't seem to be any danger. The man looked like a ... well, like an over-grown boy, really.

The first thing that sprang to mind was .. well, let's be honest, gorgeous. Tanned, incredibly muscular, and the best part: he had only a tiny little loin cloth that barely covered his privates. He had hair peppered on his muscular calves and thighs. The hair on his head was short and spiky – I discovered later he had trained his monkey to cut his hair, believe it or not.

The monkey. Well, he had a monkey perched on his shoulder. It wasn't one of those small ones, but it wasn't one of those huge gorillas either. More like an ... Overly-cute chimpanzee, who was holding the boy's shoulders, seemingly fascinated by me.

I clambered upright and discovered the boy was short. 5'10, maybe ? I towered quite a bit over him with my 6'4...

Anyway, once I stood up the boy took a cautious step back, so I raised my hands, trying to show I didn't mean any harm. I decided to sit down – cross-legged – to make sure my point came through. After a little while, the boy slowly took a hesitant step forward or two.

"Do you speak English ?" I asked. Stupid question, he probably didn't... And even if he did, my Scottish accent wouldn't help. Good thing I didn't have a thick one !

He frowned and came to sit cross-legged in front of me.

I decided to try a different manoeuvre. I had heard of natives who spoke a few words of English but had no idea what "Do you speak English" meant. So instead I put my right hand on my chest and said "Emmett".

He opened wide eyes and grinned, before putting a hand on his chest and saying "Jacob".

I smiled and nodded. Ok – progress ! Question: what next ?

I didn't have the time to think of something appropriate to say or ask, because he said "You good ?"

I chuckled, 'me good' ? What's that supposed to mean ? At least he had very rudimentary English, so I had some form of hope we would be able to understand each other. Not that I was in a hurry or anything, I was lost and stuck here ! Besides, that's why I took a whole year off, so I could do exactly what I wanted when I wanted !

Right. So, 'me good' ... Mmh ... 'me good', 'me good', what could that possibly mean ? Does he want to know if I'm a good person ? Probably not. Oh, wait ! He had carried me on to this tree while I was unconscious and put me in bed, maybe he was asking if I was feeling alright ?

Now, I had two options – try to speak in the same rudimentary English, something I really would prefer to avoid; or I could just try English without my usual fancy words. Well, might as well try, I'd just have to see !

"I'm feeling alright, thank you very much." I said, speaking slowly, making sure to detach each word and trying my best for a neutral accent.

He frowned, thought for a second before asking "You alright ?"

I smiled and nodded "Yes."

He smiled and said "Good."

I put my hand back on my chest "Thank you very much, Jacob."

He frowned "What thank-you-very-much mean ?" He tried to repeat what I had said, but he had some difficulty.

I groaned. How do you explain 'thank you very much' with simpler words ? And with words he knew ... At least he was curious, seemed naïve and wasn't afraid. That was a start.

"'Thank' 'you' means –"

He opened wide eyes and jumped, giddy with joy "I know what thank you mean !"

Right. So maybe I was still talking to fast. Or he was rusty. Probably a bit of both... Well, that depended on whether or not he was alone. Something I would have to ask !

I nodded "Very much means ..." I thought for a second. Simple words, simple words ... My eyebrows shot up "Very much means 'a lot'". I could only hope he knew what that meant.

He nodded, frowning "Very much mean a lot." He thought for a second, before grinning – did I say I loved his boyish grin ? It was really cute ! Anyway, he was grinning when he said "You say thank you a lot Jacob."

I nodded "Yes, thank you a lot, Jacob."

"Jacob happy Emmett good." Ok, so remember Emmett, good means alright. Bloody hell, I would have to make myself a dictionary ... Well, it could be worse, at least we understood each other !

My stomach grumbled right on cue, I wasn't sure what I should say or do. Should I take advantage of his naïve and gentle nature, staying here, eating his food and sleeping in his tree ? Or should i take my leave and thank him for whatever he had done ?

Again, he was faster "Emmett hungry ?"

I smiled and said guiltily "Yes ..." Man, I was more than hungry ! I was starving ! All that walking in the cold rain – When I say cold, I mean cold for Amazonia, which means hotter than a hot summer day if any of you lives in Edinburgh. But still, it felt cold at the time. Anyway, I was starving, and my stomach was complaining !

Jacob jumped up and sprinted to somewhere in his tree. I took time to observe his 'house'. I was more like a gigantic platform with some kind of a leaf-roof high above, which left more than enough space to stand up comfortably and even stretch the arms high. It looked like the tree was making walls more or less futile, huge branches full of thick leaves were extending in every direction, no wonder protecting a bit against wind and rain.

Nonetheless, there were holes here and there, letting the strong sun of Central America flood in. I couldn't imagine what it was like to live here in the rain season. Granted, it never got really cold, but that didn't mean the rain couldn't seep into your bones and make you freeze... But hey, if he was alive and well, it couldn't be that bad !

The centre of the platform was dominated by what I had taken for a huge pillar, before realizing it was the trunk of the tree. The house, or cabin, or refuge, or whatever you want to call it, was built all around the tree. In one corner there was the bed on which I had been resting – bed which, by the way, was enormous, like everything else it seemed. It was made of some kind of wood, with what looked like wool over leaves. Or maybe not wool, some kind of animal skin... I had no idea what it really was.

Anyway, there was a huge bed. The nearest branches were used as some kinds of shelves, with all sort of junk standing proudly on them. It looked like some of the branches had been carved, so the surface was flat, and had something at the very back of the make-shelf to stop the objects from falling, no doubt.

I walked around the trunk. Well, it was a bit barren. I mean sure, there was a bed and dozens of shelves like the on I described, but that was it. Oh, wait ! The bark of the trunk was carved to ! In a rough ladder ! So that's how he came up and down ... But how had he carried me up ?! Ok, he looked strong and sturdy, but I wasn't exactly light.

Over the years I had sculpted a strong body, with imposing muscles, using all that free time I had in my private gym or pool. I could probably carry Jacob, but could he carry me ? Carry me AND climb up a ladder at the same time ? Mmh ... Weird. Oh well, maybe I'd discover the secret some day !

Jacob came back. You're probably wondering where he came back from. Well, he was more or less running on a sturdy branch that extended out of his 'house'. Maybe he had different rooms ? Or maybe he had gone to pluck fruits ?

Anyway, he came back – more like ran back like an overjoyed schoolboy, actually – with some kind of a wooden plate on which was stacked a mountain of weird fruits of all kinds. He made a bee-line for a particular branch of the tree I hadn't noticed before. Well, it's difficult to explain. Let's say a large branch made some kind of large bench, whilst another broad branch was carved to make some form of a table.

He set the plate down on the broad flat branch and motioned for me to join him "Come Emmett ! Good food !"

Oh, so good also means the regular term of the word... Great... I went to sit on the bench next to him. God I could feel the heat and energy literally pouring out of him ! And it felt good ... He didn't smell bad either, as I had expected, he smelled like ... Well, I don't know, he didn't smell bad !

He dug in heartily, picking what were probably his favourite fruits. For a while I simply watched him gorge himself on fruits, and strips of dried meat that were hidden in the stack. He looked at me with a slightly worried look, his mouth stained with remnants of his terrible table-manners and asked "Emmett no want food ?"

I smiled and picked a banana. Last thing I wanted was to offend the sweet and kind kid !

He frantically shook his head and grappled the banana from my hands "Banana for Spyke" he explained.

Right. Banana for Spyke. Well, that makes sense. Or not. Banana for Spyke ? And I thought we were making progress... He interrupted my confused thoughts by whistling and yelling "SPYKE ! FOOD !"

Oh, so Spyke was a person ! Who only fed on bananas ? Mmh, I felt like there was something I was missing ... And i was right. A second later, the monkey jumped in from a random branch and sprang for the banana, like he knew I had almost eaten it. The chimpanzee deftly pealed the fruit and ate it. He ate two more before making his was to Jacob's lap and lying there, looking full and content.

"Emmett no like food Jacob have ?" Jacob looked heartbroken. My heart melted, the kid was really too sweet !

I quickly took one of the less suspicious looking fruits and started pealing it, before hesitantly taking a mouthful. Well, it didn't taste horrible, not that it tasted marvellous either, but it would be enough to show the boy I wasn't being ungrateful !

As soon as I started eating Jacob smiled and continued to gorge himself. He sure had an appetite ! Then again, running around naked all day must demand quite a lot of energy ...

I tasted a different fruit, which tasted awful, but I finished it anyway. I took a third one, which tasted wonderful. I picked my way through the mountain. I started to feel better. But the dry meat looked awfully good ... I knew how dangerous bad meat could be. I also knew Jacob and I were used to different foods, so there was probably going to be a very uncomfortable getting-used-to period ...

Oh, what the hell ! I was here for new experiences and adventure ! I took a stripe of meat and savagely tore into it. Tasted kind of salty, but nice. I took two more slices before feeling full.

By the time we were both done, the sun was setting, and Spyke was sleeping soundly in Jacob's lap. Jacob himself yawned. He said "Jacob tired. Jacob go bed." He picked up the monkey lovingly and made his way to the bed.

I nodded. Ok ... Now came the moment where I: was asked to leave, asked to stay and I declined or asked to stay and I accepted. I was standing awkwardly, unsure of what to do. Jacob seemed to remember he had a guest. He turned to me, half-way to his bed, and hesitated.

This time I was faster "Thank you very much, Jacob. Thank you a lot."

He grinned through tired eyes and said "Emmett come bed. Dark soon, need sleep."

The bed sure was big enough for two. Probably even for three ... Don't think like that, Emmett ! I couldn't sleep in the bed of that naïve, innocent, gorgeous creature. I didn't trust myself.

So I took out the sleeping-bag that was fastened at the top of my backpack, which apparently Jacob had brought up for me, rolled it out and set it on the floor. It wasn't one of those hot ones for the mountain, but one designed for the jungle. The nights were probably cold around here ... I had no idea how Jacob didn't freeze to death each night !

Jacob watched me from where he was lying in bed, looking fascinated with my every move. When I lied down on my sleeping bag, deciding it really was too warm to slip in it, he seemed to understand.

"Emmett no want sleep bed ?"

I turned towards him and smiled gently "Thank you a lot for asking, but I don't want to intrude." Hoping he would understand.

"What intrude mean ?" I almost sighed. Right. Explain intrude ...

"Hum ... bother ?" I asked uncertainly.

"Emmett no bother Jacob !" He said vehemently, as though I had offended him.

"I know, but I want to avoid bothering you." I clarified. Avoid ? Would he know what that means ?

He looked like he understood, and proved it by saying "Emmett no fear bother Jacob !"

Ugh. The boy was stubborn ! How do you explain 'I don't want to share a bed to avoid raping you' in simple words ?! And to a boy who probably knows nothing about sex, thinking his cock is used to eliminate waste only...

I tried another approach " Please, I don't want to share your bed."

He frowned, but either misunderstood me or was offended enough not to push the matter. As much as I didn't want to hurt his feelings, I preferred he thought I didn't want to be anywhere near his bed rather than be tempted all night to part his legs and pound him like some horny animal !

Jacob quickly fell asleep. That's when I remembered I had already slept for about 24 hours and had woken up a few moments ago. I grunted and turned, trying to find a comfortable position on the hard wood, made slightly more comfortable by the sleeping bag.

Well, short version: I never fell asleep. So after a while I decided to let my mind wander. I put my hands behind my head, and gazing at the stars in the moonlight, I let my thoughts free. I realize I didn't miss one bit the comfort of McCarty manor, nor the boring personnel, nor my stupid ex-boyfriend.

Stupid James. I could still remember finding him in bed, in MY manor, with one of the valets. I also discovered he had been stealing valuables. Let's just say dating Lord McCarty sure had upsides !

I had let my over-paid lawyer loose and enjoyed seeing him reduced to begging me to forgive him when the judge had punished him to five years of prison and to pay me £500.000 about half what the amount he had stolen, for aggravated theft, abuse of trust and re-selling. The money more than paid my lawyer, and I was more or less sure no one would try that stunt again !

So being here, with an innocent kid, who knew nothing of the corruption of the world, with no idea that I was worth about £10 billion, while my younger brother, Edward, the Count of Glasgow, took care of everything was perfect. And I wasn't even feeling guilty for leaving my brother to do everything, he had been happy actually. He was a real business man, had been to LSE, done a precious MBA somewhere in a prestigious uni in the US, etc etc.

I could see myself living here for a whole year before returning to my life in Edinburgh, full of experiences to talk about, stories for my students. From what I gathered, Jacob would probably be happy if I stayed with him ... But that's the thing: the line between over-zealous philanthropy and taking advantage of a person is very thin. I didn't want to take advantage of him. If I stayed I would have to help him every way I could, whatever he got up to all day, I would have to share his life, not only his food and bed...

Well, I would have to discuss with him, however difficult it would be, and see what he thought of the matter. He looked like he was living alone ... I found myself hoping he would agree to let me stay for a long time...

Only problem was: my libido. It was more or less certain I would end up trying to touch him, and this would get very fucked-up. I didn't want to be the old perverted, obsessed paedophile of the story ... I sighed. Well, I'd just have to see !


A/N : Next chapter next week ! I'll be waiting for feedback ! Please tell me what you think :D