A quick one-shot I drew up. I've always wanted to see more of Gale's emotions.
Reviews are greatly appreciated.
I do not own "The Hunger Games" or any of its affiliates. This is made non-commercially for the entertainment of others. (and myself, I suppose)
The moon is full. The night's warm.
I'm probably not supposed to be here. It feels like a sneaky, underhand trick. I still haven't fully figured out my motives, which is what bothers me the most about this. I don't want to be doing this for myself, I want to do this for her. I stride into the yard, and slow down when I see the circle of Primroses constructed by Peeta. I stop, and take a long moment to stare. It's odd, looking at Prim's memorial. So much of my life came to be because of her mere existence. I gaze up at Katniss's temporary home. A very dim light comes out of the top floor. Maybe Peeta's here, being an exemplary lover. No. Let's just say he isn't. I set my bag down at my feet, and kneel in the soft grass. I sigh.
"Hi there, Prim." I say. An awkward beginning. I sigh again.
"I kind of wish I'd gotten to know you better. You seemed really sweet." I try to press on. There are definitely a lot of things to say.
"When I reflect on it..." I pause. "You helped start all of this, didn't you?" Maybe that was a bit too vague.
"Your sister wouldn't have volunteered had you not gotten reaped, I mean... I guess you're sort of an unsung hero, Huh?" I realize it feels better to talk with her in familiar terms.
"I remember holding you in my arms, comforting you and your Mom when Katniss volunteered..."
"She asked to see me too, before she left. Maybe you saw me leaving the room when you came." I chuckle at myself.
"Sorry for bringing me into this." I breath in and out slowly, inching along with my speech.
"I have really strong feelings for your big sister, Prim..." I start. There are other girls out there. Wonderful. But none of them are Katniss.
"I know you couldn't really see her like that, but you've probably had a crush before." I took that away from her, didn't I? The chance to experience love.
"God, I wish you could've had a chance to know what it feels like... to feel that connection to somebody." I feel a lump in my throat.
"Her lips, Prim..." a couple tears fall down my cheeks, and a sob escapes my lips. I take a couple moments to regain my composure.
"I'm sorry." I say."I don't want you to feel like I'm apologizing to you so I can get back to her." I pause a moment.
"I wish you hadn't... well, I hadn't... you know." It feels too odd articulating the details of somebody's death to them...
"Katniss sort of blames me for it..." I say.
"I designed them. The bombs. I'm sorry you were on the receiving end." I should try to explain. She deserves at least that.
"See, when you're making war behind the lines, it's just like rooting for a team... you just want your side to win. I was really close minded about that." I bow my head a bit.
"It's not a game anymore when the people you wanted to protect start to die... but you don't realize that that's what the other side is thinking too." I haven't been able to fully come to terms with that until I said it just then. It feels good, like ice on a bruise. "Any military victory is also a loss." I mutter.
"And I'm so sorry. Dying must suck. I really hope it was quick. So you didn't have too much time process it." I smile a bit.
"Ignorance is bliss, right?" I trail off, trying to figure out what to say next.
"I hope death's treating you alright." I state. "Maybe it's a bit relaxing. My mom used to always talk about this place called 'Heaven' that people believed in before it all hit the fan. Way before Panem was created." I always liked this story.
"What happened was that you went there after you died, and lived forever with the people you loved inside a world of eternal happiness. It would be cool if that was real." I shrug and chuckle to ease the seriousness.
"It'd be a nice surprise to just open your eyes, with everything perfect surrounding you..." I feel like I'm getting to know her better with just with this one-sided conversation.
"You know what Peeta told me your last word was? 'Katniss'." I shake my head and smile to myself. "That's a pretty great last word. I almost envy you." That statement might've come across as odd.
"Sorry. That probably sounded sort of rude. But in all seriousness, your last words, your last acts, your personality... " her last acts were amazing. "You ran into a fire, after hearing a child scream for help. You loved animals too, didn't you?" she really was a passionate person. More so than I can say with just a few simple words. "You weren't just selfless... you just never even thought about yourself. That's pretty awesome, Prim." I clasp my hands and stare at her flowers for a few minutes, feeling a vary solemn, but satisfied.
"I've working on the District Two cleanup for a bit lately." I say after a couple minutes. "I learned to work metal pretty well, so I've been doing some art. I took some time to make these for you." I stand up and open my bag to reach for the toy inside. I take it into the palm of my hand, and open it partially.
"See, this thing is called a nesting doll." I stare at it, feeling proud of my work. "Well, there's a few dolls all together, but the point is that they fit inside of each other, like this." I take off another layer to demonstrate. "See, each one is a different animal. I had to paint them instead of shape them, cause they had to fit together." I finish lamely. I set it down to rest on the earth at my feet, and reach for the next item. I make a small clang when I take the silver nest and its stand out of my bag.
"Here's the other one." I begin. "This one I made to remember you. You know how people call your sister "Mockingjay", right? You're her little sister, so the chick bursting from the egg is supposed to be you." I stick the stand in the center of the flowers, resting the silver nest on top of it. I stand back to look at it in its rightful place. Her memorial feels a bit warmer now. "I'm kind of proud of it, actually." I say to Prim. I hoist my empty bag over my shoulder, and kneel again. I shake my head, feeling emotion rise in my chest like waves pounding a rocky shore.
"You know..." I mutter into my hand, trying to express myself with better articulation.
"I wish I could miss you more than I do." I whisper. "So I could feel some of Katniss's pain. I feel mostly guilt, though." I put both my hands to my mouth.
"I really wish I could do something more than say sorry..." I shift my weight and squat, rocking back and forth on the balls of my feet. I wait for awhile, thinking. The night inches onward, but I stay in my own world, frozen in time. Thoughts of Katniss float through my mind, and pop blissfully like bubbles. thoughts of what Prim was and could've been slowly swirl about my skull. I breathe in, and rise slowly.
"See you around." I say. I look at her flowers one more time, thinking. Crickets chirp in the background, and the ambiance of the night soothes me. I turn on my heel, and walk away.