Novinha jumped out of bed with sweat clinging to her small frame. This was now six nights she had woken from her sleep at the scream of her name from his lips. She held her head and took a deep breath though her mouth. Black hair clung to her face and she wondered, why did things have to happen this way? I should have said I would marry him, should have told him,
should have been there for him, should have stopped him. Tears went down Novinha's face and she held herself, how many more times would she be robbed of her sleep because of the sin she couldnt let go? How many more days would she live knowing that she would never be truly happy. Although to Novinha she stayed silent, she thought.
"Yes, this is what I get, for letting him die."
She sat there for a few long moments and then realized she wasnt going to be getting any more sleep tonight. Takeing another deep breath she stopped her crying and got out of bed. Novinha had on a long white night-dress and her hair was messy and fell over her shoulders. She really was a lovely women, even thow she was only 29, she seemed much older. Really who could blame her? Walking out of her lab she walked with bare feet to the 'fence'. The place where two of her loved ones were killed by the aliens that lived beyond. She wanted to scream, to run in there and ask why they killed them? Was it truly God who was doing this to her? Hadn't she had what was coming to her already? Now her own son was out there...with them.
"If you take my son I will kill every last one of you." Novinha said softly.
"Thats a little dark, even for you." A voice said from behind her.
Novinha turned, brown eyes going wide at the pale man in front of her. His black hair was messy and he was only in black pants. Andrew Wiggin, the Speaker that she herself had called here many years ago. All he had done was make Novinha's life a living hell, even made her own children love him.
"What do you need Speaker?" She asks.
Andrew's blue eyes look her up and down, every time he did this made Novinha shiver. He was so opened about staring at her that it seemed normal. He was even paler in the moonlight of their planet making him seem more inhuman then he already was.
"Nothing, I had just noticed that for the past few days you've come out here with puffy eyes and your hair a mess."
He says bluntly.
"You were watching me?" She asks after a moment.
"I always watch you." He replies.
His eyes stayed locked on her's making her unable to look away, or walk away for that matter. Thats what she would always do when Andrew got to close, after all the last thing Novinha needed in her life was another man. Her husband had just died and Andrew acted like it was normal to act as thow Novinha was already his! He would take care of her children, would walk in like it was his own house! What could she do? Nothing, that's what she could do, her children loved him, and it was her fault he was here in the first place! So yet again Novinha stood in front of the Speaker with sharp eyes and a set mouth.
"Stop saying things like that." She says finally looking away from him.
"What, the truth. Thats not a very good thing to tell a person." He smiles.
"If that's all you have to say then go." She snaps.
"I always have more to say, but in life you don't always have the chance to say what you need to." He says calmly.
There he went always making her feel like he was preaching to her, like he was trying to make her see some plan that he had but she was to stupid to think of what it was on her own. He drove her crazy, even now she almost felt like hitting him but she knew she wouldn't. She would stay calm, she would suffer though this like she did everything. She could not run from the man who was here because she told him to come. He gave up his life to be here, his family and whatever he might have had on another world, and for what? So he could always be put down by the people here, by her. Yes Novinha knew even now she was being a bitch to this man but did she care, not really. He could leave, start somewhere new, but did he, no. He would stay until he had changed Novinha's life until she didnt even remember her old one. So she hated him because it was working. He children were smiling, her house was clean. She was the outsider now, the one that no one wanted to come home. So she would just hid from the Speaker in her lab and do her work wail he took her family from her.
She would not give him her thow, she would not let that happen.
"Must you always speak in such a way?" Novinha asks.
"What about you? Must you always hide from me? Why not talk to me?" Andrew says grinning.
Novinha felt her face get hot and she was able to look away from him. Her anger was even more so now, but she had walked right into his trap. What could she do now but talk to him? He was always a step ahead of her, like he was reading her mind. If she walked away now she would look like a child who lost a game and wouldn't pay the price.
"Why on earth would I want to talk to you? Dont you already know everything you need to know?" She asks with acid in her voice.
"I think I have a lot to find out, one of thoughs things is you. Novinha."
She turn back to him raping her arms around herself, the way he said her name was too much for her. Just by saying her name Andrew could make her get all flustered and weak in the knees. She hated it, she wanted to make it go away. He was doing things to her without even trying, it was like the world itself breathed life into this man. He was, not worm like him...but hot. Almost to hot, like if she were to get any closer to him, she would burn up and never be seen again. She did not want to get lost in the maze that was Andrew Wiggin.
"Stop saying things like that." Novinha says.
"Do you really want me to do that?"
Novinha's eyes went wide as she felt a hand on her shoulder. It burned, burned her whole body to feel his hand on her in any way. She wanted to jump back, to scream to say things that would save her heart from the Devil that was the Speaker!
She turned her dark hair falling over her shoulder.
"Dont touch me without asking." Novinha hisses.
"Can I touch you?" He asks simply.
Novinha's eyes went wide as she looked at the man before her. So blunt, so cruel, he would even let her recover from his touch. He would keep on comeing with his sweet words, with his burning eyes. Was he really a devil sent to harm her?
Or was he something more than that? Novinha believed that a man had to have been an angle once. She wouldn't let herself think that again. Men she loved died, end of story and she would not have the Speakers blood on her hands.
"Let me go, I'm going home." She says.
Although Novinha regretted the words the moment they left her mouth. Andrew's eyes grew dark, almost menacing in the light of the night. She wanted to take back the words to not give him such a powerful punch to throw, but it was too late.
"Home, as in to your children who havent seen you for three days? Or is your lab your home now?"
"I wont hear this from you." Novinha says turning away from him.
"You can walk away, but one day Novinha your going to be forced to turn and face me, your children and everything that hurts you the most. I will make the shore of that." He says without any bitterness.
Thats what made it so hard on Novinha, it would be so much easier if he hated her, called her names. Even if he merely thought bad of her would help lessen his control over her. Although he was already to far into her life. Novinha wondered then if there was really no way around the man with the light blue eyes and skin. Would she have to bring him in, let him die simply because she couldn't find a way to keep him away? Yes, she was going to hell...it was the only place where she might belong.
"Good night Speaker." Novinha whispers walking away.
A hand lightly grabs her hand and stops her from going on, she turns and see nothing but sadness and regret in Andrews eyes.
"I've made you cry." He stats.
Novinha didnt belive it herself till she felt the wetness go down her cheek and on to her night-dress. Now she really wanted to run. To hide from the man who did this to her. Damn him, damn the way God treated her!
"Just leave me be you devil of a man." She says trying to hide behind her hair.
"If I leave you be I will be breaking a promise."
"To what? Ruin my life?"
"To your son, I promised that I would heal you, and I intend to do that."
Novinha tried to pull away but in the end the Speaker had her to his chest and he was lightly rubbing her back. It felt amazing, right. Although this was so wrong of her to do, if she gave him her heart then she would end his life. She wanted to pull away, to scream and then bag the man to leave this place. To find a safe and loving life somewhere far from here. She already ruined her children's lives, she didn't want any more sin, any more regrets.
"I will be the death of you." She says quietly into his chest.
"Then I am a lucky man."
"Then I will burn with the passion that you alone have made me feel."
Novinha looked up with wide teary eyes to say that he was wrong, a fool for openly saying he felt such things. Although she never got the chance. Andrew's lips were on hers and she could say nothing. Her whole being was burning away, she was dyeing, but she liked it. Willingly giving her soul to the hands of the devil. She could not pull away and the breath in her lungs was taken from her. Andrew's kiss was demanding, strong, and filled with passion she never thought possible. In one way it was light and tender, but the feeling behind it was clear. She would be his, whether she wanted it or not. The man in front of her would steal her heart and mind from her to get her. She was trapped and when she felt his hand on her back it only made her want more, more of the Speaker. When the kiss finally ended she stood in his arms gasping. Wail his breathing was fast he still looked at her with warmth and longing, a longing that she would never fully understand.
"Why have you come? You will burn my soul, you will be the sword above my head." She whispers.
"If that is so, then kill me. For I would never want to be the thing you fear, I want to be the thing you desire. Novinha you belive God has sent me to punish you further, but what if I am what he ment to give you all along?"
She looked at him for a long moment, he had planted the idea in her mind. What if the Speaker was not a demon...but an angel.
"Then I will taint you, be the things that robs you of life. I am a devil walking, staying with me will only destroy you.
I am not a person, but a shell of one, being with me is empty."
"If that is what you belive then I will love you untill you can love yourself. I love your children and I loved you even before I met you. When I looked apon the young girl, who's eyes were like my own, I fell in love. I knew that I was ment for her and she for me. The pitcher of you is what started it all and whether you remember or not. You need me Novinha and I will need you."
"Good night Andrew." Novinha says pulling herself free.
This time Andrew watched as Novinha walked away, he loved her and now she knew that. She would think about him tonight and hopefully she would be able to sleep. He couldn't wait until his Speaking, he would bring the life back into that women if it was the last thing he ever did. Yes, sleep Novinha because wether or not I ever belive in God I do know one thing. If there is a God, he made me for you.
A/N) Ok I can't belive there isnt more story's about this amazing book saga! I hope you like this cute little story about Ender and Novinha. Please let me know if you liked it.