Hey everyone, this is a new one-shot that I wrote while randomly thinking of the relationship between Grace and her father. I really felt like for this piece I had to step into Grace's shoes and try to see what she's feeling. I hope you guys enjoy, this is a bit of a bitter piece too.
Grace stared out the window. The sky was clear as day and the sun shined bright. The birds seemed to mock her with their cheery expressions as they sang happy tunes. She sat there, her eyes lacking emotion. Outside it looked like the perfect Sunday, and if this were any other day then it would be just that, perfect. But today it wasn't perfect, today she wasn't perfect. She could usually fake a cheery smile, or a laugh, but today she couldn't. She was tired of pretending to be happy, of pretending to be perfect, when inside she was aching. She knew why she was so hurt.
It was because of him.
"Grace!" Her mother called, "Are you almost dressed! It's time to go to church! Tom and Jacob are already in the car!"
The voice of her mother jerked her out of her thoughts as she moved away from the window. She walked over to her bedroom door and opened it slightly then let out a sigh, "I'm not going today mom! I'm sorry I just- I can't...there's something that I need to do."
Kathleen was shocked. Sure, Grace had skipped church before, but that was when she decided to turn away from God, and away from Christianity, and Kathleen feared that she would do that again. She wrapped the cookies she was planning on bringing to the church in foil and headed upstairs to check on her daughter.
Her light footsteps found their way to Grace's bedroom and she knocked on the door gently, "Grace, honey, are you alright?"
"I'm fine mom." Was her response, but Kathleen knew her daughter too well for that, and she knew that she wasn't fine, so she opened the door and stared at her daughter who was staring out her bedroom window.
"Are you sure you're alright?" Kathleen asked, and Grace nodded, not even looking her mother in the eye.
"Well if you're alright, why are you staring at the window instead of heading over to church with Tom and Jacob honey?" She questioned, but the girl fell silent, "Is this about Jack?" Kathleen asked, almost rolling her eyes at the statement.
She never really did approve of Jack and Grace's relationship.
Grace scoffed, "No, mom it's not about Jack. I haven't talked to him in weeks anyway."
Kathleen's eyebrows raised, "Really? Then honey, what is it? And please don't make me play this game of guessing. I'll be late for church and Rev. Stone wants me to help him out with something."
"Do you even know what today is?" Grace said, her voice suddenly turning angry.
"Of course I do it's Sunday, April 8-" Then it clicked, and Kathleen's expression softened, "Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I completely forgot about his birthday."
"I wish I could forget." Grace mumbled, and Kathleen gave her daughter a sad smile, "Grace, don't be bitter. Things are what they are. God has a plan for everything. I'm happy now, with George."
Grace grimaced when she said that, she didn't hate George, but she just couldn't see him living in their house, eating up all their food, and trying to be a father to her. She was happy that she would be off to college soon, because she wouldn't be able to deal with it. She just wondered what would happen to Tom when she left, and if Tom would start acting like him.
"I'll tell you what Grace, why don't I take you to the graveyard and I'll head out to church with Tom and Jacob?" She said, patting her daughter on the back. Grace let out a sigh, her mother didn't get it, no one ever did, but yet she agreed to go.
Grace was dropped off at the graveyard site that her dad was buried at. It was walking distance from her church, and she walked through the yard quietly until she found his grave. She knelt down, and stared at it. She closed her eyes as the tears began to swell up in her eyes. She let them run down her cheek as she bit her lip to hold back her sobs. She clamped her shaky hands together and did what she would always do, pray. But this time, she prayed to her father, she wanted to send him a message, she wanted to tell him something that she had never been able to get off of her mind before.
Happy Birthday Dad,
It feels like it's been forever since you've been gone. I want to say that I miss you, and that I love you, because no matter what I will always love you, but I'm also angry with you. That day the plane crashed, I was convinced that it was because of what I had done with Jack. I thought, how else could someone so god-like, so strong in faith, be forced to go through something so horrible when they still had so much life left in this world? I cried for you everyday, I begged you, and the Lord for forgiveness, and then in anger, to try and get rid of the horrible feelings I continued to have, I started to have sex with other people. I started to feel that empty void that I was feeling. I was trying to find love because you were gone.
And when everything started to heal, and I realized that everything happens for a reason, I got better. But then I found out something, I found out that you're just a hypocrite, a fake , a pretend! Did you ever love me at all dad? Did you ever love mom? You had to, I saw the look in your eyes when you hugged her, when you kissed her, the thought alone always made me smile. Daddy, you were my superhero, my knight, you tried to protect me from all the bad people in the world. But weren't you equally as bad? You were selfish Marshall...it wasn't enough that you were blessed with one perfect family, but you had to have another one on the side. I used to look up to, even when you were gone I wanted to be like you, and I want to forgive you but how can I? All those years of thinking you were the most perfect dad in the world, all those years of thinking that you could never do anything to hurt me...You stabbed me in the back, you took everything that I had ever known and you changed it. You changed my entire perspective of you. So I'm sorry that this prayer isn't happy, but excuse me for being a little bit bitter about the fact that you played me and my family for years, and the worst part is that we never saw it coming. But if I learned anything in my life it's that people make mistakes, and NO ONE, is perfect. Does that make me any less angry with you, no. But at least now, I can try to understand where you were coming from.
Grace opened her eyes, letting out a breath that she never knew she was holding in. It felt good to get everything out, even if she wasn't talking to anyone face to face. She looked at her father's grave again, and she traced the name with her fingers. No matter what, she would always remember him as a superhero, even if he was a villain in disguise.