A/N: Perfect dad Bumby was always an idea I've been toying with for a long time. I'd just think it's funny as hell. The concept, not the fic. I'd doubt Alice would find it funny at all. And this is a one-shot.
She sees them in the living room.
Angus Bumby, the bastard who ruined her life is playing peek-a-boo with their daughter. The tiny infant squeals in delight and claps her small hands. She fights the myriad of feelings: rage, hatred, jealousy, love, and longing. She hates it. She hates the fact she's married to him, hated carrying his child, and hated to admit that he's a wonderful father to their daughter. She doesn't want to admit she hates her daughter even just a little bit; she hates herself all the more for it.
It's all Angus Bumby's fault.
It's because of him she no longer has her family. It's because of him she was in an asylum for 10 years. It's because of him she'd gotten pregnant and had to marry him. It's because of him she doesn't want to admit that she's jealous of her own daughter. Jealous of her innocence, jealous of her happiness, and…jealous of the attention she gets from her father.
It isn't fair!
He ruined her life, why should he get his happy ending and she doesn't? She can't blame her daughter, her precious baby girl for this. She's done nothing wrong except for sharing his blood. It just galled her to no end hearing the women whisper jealously to each other how lucky she is to marry to the "good doctor", how he's a wonderful man , he is such a saint to marry her, and he's such a good father.
And she can't say anything otherwise. Didn't they know that he was a monster? That he killed her family and virtually enslaved her to him? She wants to scream out the injustice of it all. She wants to hate him but she can't. He's done nothing wrong to their child and to her after discovering she was pregnant. He was nothing but the model husband and father. It irks her knowing that he adores their child; he's wrapped around her tiny finger. He was the one rocking her to sleep, feeding her, taking her out to the park, and read her bedtime stories. Her first word was "dada"; it should have been "mama". She carried her in her womb for 9 months. She tried to be a good mother, she tried but it was hard to love her daughter at first.
She admits in shame that she wasn't a good mother for the first few months. How could she? Giving birth to his child, she couldn't even look at her daughter without disgust. To be reminded that this child was his. The infant cried all the time and she couldn't bother moving on from her selfish misery to even care about the new life she brought in to the world. It was only after she was given an ultimatum that she stayed if only to be a part of her daughter's life.
Alice nee Liddell gave up her one chance of freedom, to leave him and their child behind.
He approached her with the child in his arms, angrily stating that 3 months of enduring her utter neglect to their daughter is enough. That she could leave for all he cares, he doesn't want his daughter to have a spiteful bitch for a mother. That he'll dissolve the marriage and she'll never be a part of the child's life. He can easily have another woman help him raise their daughter. How his daughter will never know of her real mother. She screamed at him that she didn't want the child in the first place. She'll gladly leave them; let the child believe the other woman was her birth mother, in order to be free again.
He puts the now crying child into her arms, daring her to look into her daughter's eyes and tell him she hates the child.
The eyes were green.
She's feels like a monster. She's no better than him. Tears fall as she realized that she has been punishing an innocent child, her child for being born. Her daughter didn't deserve this, she deserved better. She feels the child being taken away from her arms; she fights to hold her daughter close. He's already taken her family once; she won't let him take another. Alice doesn't think she could live with the regret of leaving her only child. To think of what could have been.
So she stayed.
She was wrong for thinking her daughter would be like him. Her daughter was nothing but a bundle of light and joy. Her "mini-Alice", Bumby fondly calls her. Though she thinks she might as well be a "mini-Lizzie". She wonders briefly if she was like this when she was younger.
But it still pains her relying on his help in raising their daughter. It reminded her of her awful neglect. Having him teach her how to hold her, feed her, change her, learning her fussy habits. It didn't help when he plainly stated that he couldn't trust her alone with their daughter, that she had to be supervised. She kept her mouth shut; she deserved that but it still hurts.
It took a while for them to adjust to a comfortable routine but they managed. Bumby keeps surprising her at how much he cares for their daughter. He didn't treat their child like an object at all; she caught him one night singing their daughter a lullaby to quiet down her cries. She slowly started to fall in love with him then.
What she didn't like was how much attention he was getting whenever they go out to the market. Ladies flocking over to him were cooing how adorable their little girl is. That he should come in for tea sometime and bring his little girl over, conveniently ignoring the fact he was now a married man. Alice hates the uncomfortable feeling in her belly whenever he would smile and promise "one day" to them. Frightened of losing his affection, frightened of losing her child, she holds her daughter close daring them to deny that she was the rightful mother. She doesn't want any of them near her daughter…or her husband.
She tries to make up for the lost time she had with them. But she can't help but feel resentful when he would genuinely smile at their daughter's antics and ignore her. She ignored the pain in her heart when their daughter would get her father's attention. She often wondered if she has any place in their hearts. She hated feeling so small and inferior.
She can't help but wish that maybe she should have accepted his offer to leave when she had the chance.
Seeing them so happy together, and she wasn't a part of it.
Alice turns to leave to her room and cry about the unfairness of it all. It was only after she heard, "Mama!" that she stopped.
Bumby walks over to her, carrying their daughter in his arms. "She misses her mother you know." Alice numbly holds her daughter close to her bosom, feeling the tiny arms wrap around her neck. He gives her a small smile and kisses her on softly on the lips then kisses their daughter on the head before leaving the two of them alone for some mother-daughter time.
Angus Bumby was nothing but the perfect father and husband, and that forever galled Alice to no end.
A/N: This took an unexpected angsty turn. I wanted a more humorous crack type one. Oh well, I can always make another version of it. Yes I deliberately withheld the child's name, and her first name is NOT Lizzie. That's the bullcrap J.K. uses on naming kids. As always, please leave a review.