So I went back to read some of my stories and their reviews, and I suddenly wanted, really badly, to make a sequel for Demise. I had some ideas on what to do, and then it all went blank. I'll make this sequel a one-shot as well, but no more! I'm sorry I haven't been updating very fast, I've been really, really busy with college and homework…
But anyways, I decided to begin this now and end it all in one sitting, very hard to do for me…. But I wanted to do this because today is my… birthday! Haha, so um, I'm nineteen now, nothing special, and it was a pretty boring day… Well onwards to the story!
You don't have to read 'Demise,' but it's highly recommended since their relationship will not make too much sense.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Naruto characters, but the story is mine.
Fear, pain, humiliation, abuse, rape. These were among a few of the things that my canary had to endure over the years he's lived. And though undoubtedly even humans have experienced similar things, at least they one day died and escaped such things. Naruto would live for eternity with the memories and scars, unless I put him out of his misery, which I would definitely not do.
Watching him from across the room from where he sits, I see the frown on his face, his eyes cast down, and holding onto that incessant purple blanket. He didn't look angry, but rather upset. I don't know what to do for him that would not involve doing something that I have already established would not be allowed. And though it may have been healthier for Naruto to be outside, I will not allow it.
It's been a year since I've brought him back, but nothing has changed. Giving him his space, I didn't bother him unless it was necessary, i.e. feeding or bathing time, but under no circumstances did I allow him outside the house.
The last he's seen the sun was the day I brought him back, and given that alone must have been making him even more depressed. I couldn't risk anyone or thing getting near him. He was like a human now, vulnerable to everything. I wouldn't risk his safety just to let him have a bit of fresh air, so he would be fine in this windowless place as long as I cared for him. At least that's what I kept reassuring myself.
"Are you hungry?" I ask gently, but he doesn't even look up, much less answer. My canary doesn't speak to me very often, and it's as if his wings were clipped, but I suppose they literally were. I'm afraid to touch him, not sure if he'll lash out at me, or break down. He was an empty shell, but I knew somewhere in him was a spark of life. I just had to find it and dig it back out.
Of course, first I would need to figure out a way to make him forgive me. What he had been through couldn't be taken lightly, and though it was not me who had done those things to him, for the most part, it was still my responsibility to take the blame.
I look him up and down, eyes trying to figure what he wanted from me. He looks exhausted, something that happened quite often when he was hungry. Feeding him was always a chance type of thing, he would either resist being fed and fight back, or he wouldn't move and allow me to just pour the blood into his mouth. Because it was never clear on what mood he was in, I was always in danger of spilling and wasting his food during these times.
Rising from the couch, I go to the kitchen and retrieve a blood packet from the fridge and return to Naruto. He doesn't acknowledge me, even when I'm standing in front of him and it looks like it will be a nonresistant feeding this time. Ripping open the tip of the bag, I gently touch Naruto's face, to which he flinches slightly, eyes moving to look at me.
His eyes lack the bright blue that they once were during our childhood, and instead have taken on an almost muddy gray, and I see that all those years have taken a great toll on both his psychical and mental health. I lightly try to pry his mouth open and he resists at first, but finally allows me to and I empty half the bag of blood down his mouth, before shutting it once more, knowing he'll either just spit it back out or let it run out. I wait for him to swallow it, but having done this a million times before, I knew I'd have to wait awhile. There was no way to force him to swallow since he did not breath, so the trick of holding his nose closed would not work.
After a couple of minutes he does swallow, but when I try to give him the other half, he glares at me and refuses to open his mouth again. Why was he being so difficult. It was a wonder how I kept from hitting him most of the time when he acted this way. He purposely chose to do things like this to get on my nerves, I just knew he did.
Less than gently, I open his mouth and dump the remaining bag of blood, and have to tightly hold onto his mouth to keep it closed as he struggles to spit it out. A bit of the blood trickles from the sides of his mouth as he tries to shake my grip loose, but I hold firm until he swallows what's in his mouth. When I release him, he looks up at me, anger in his eyes. It was for his own good, and he knew it. He just wanted to be difficult.
Why couldn't he just let me be? I didn't want to eat that disgusting cold blood that he gathered from both human and animal. It was indecent to be drinking it cold, and to be mixing them with each other was an absolute abomination. A vampire drinking mixed blood was like a human drinking milk mixed with orange juice. Did he not realize that?
I glare at him for a few moments more before returning to my other task at hand, staring at anything other than him. This place was suffocating me. I wanted to go outside and feel the wind again, to feel the sun's hot rays on my skin. These simple pleasures I once took for granted were now gone from my life.
I feel Sasuke shift closer to me as he watches me up close, and I continue to ignore him. He touches my mouth, wiping away the blood that has managed to escape from my mouth, asking, "what's wrong?" What kind of question was that to be asking? Wasn't it obvious what was wrong? Everything was crap here, just like some sort of prison. My mind often wonders what would have been a better alternative, living out there or in here?
His hand touches mine, which in turn are tightly clutching the purple blanket. Very rarely would I let it go, and I think it irritated him to some sort of end. He's trying to pry my fingers off the blanket without actually using any strength, and I just tighten my grip, not wanting to let go of my 'security,' even for a moment.
He gives up after awhile, and rises from the ground where he had been crouching. I'm tired, and he must have sensed it because he picks me up and takes me to his room. I don't want to sleep there, I want to sleep on the couch, but I don't struggle since he obviously would win despite whatever protests fuel me. He lays me on the bed once we enter and I feel like a spoilt child in a way, but in reality, it's defeat. This was my existence now. A lifeless doll, unable to even hope for a better tomorrow.
I roll onto my side, facing the wall and away from him as he sits at the edge of the bed. It was always like this. Because he was a daemon and needed no sleep, he would watch me until I slept, and sometimes when I'd wake up, he would still be there sitting.
What did he want from me? I couldn't give him anything because I had nothing. No pride, no soul, not even my innocence anymore. But I must have had something since I was still here. That was after all what daemons did, keep a captive until they took everything that they could get their claws into. My eyes feel heavy, and I pull my 'security' to my chest, hoping it will bring good dreams instead of the usual nightmares this time.
I tenderly stroke his hair as he falls into a deep slumber, and I admire his sleeping features. As of late, my canary was having trouble sleeping, so I had began to slip ground sleeping pills into his blood supply. They affected him immediately, since there was a slight alcohol concentration in them.
I stare at the rag of a blanket in his clutch, trying to figure out what was so great about it. It was just a blanket that once lined his cage as a child, so shouldn't he have hated it? I didn't understand him at all. And maybe that's where I was going wrong. I should understand my mate better, right? But it was so hard to when he wanted nothing to do with me.
Letting out a sigh, I watch him for a bit longer, wondering if he'll sleep fitfully tonight. I made his dosage higher than usual tonight so that he would sleep and not dream, but who knew if it would work? I lay down next to him, wondering what would happen if I were to touch more than just his hair.
I place a hand on his scarred wrist, and he slightly stiffens in his sleep but relaxes once more. I run a finger down his scars, wondering how long the self feeding could have been going on for, and how it had began. When did he tire of blood and suddenly begin to crave his own? At least with the injection he wouldn't be able to make such marks on himself anymore.
He stirs awake finally hours later, and I move away from him before he can realize how close I was to him as he slept. "Morning." I greet him, and of course there's no reply. Despite his eyes being open, he makes no indication to get up, as always, and I wonder how to start the day off today.
I touch his blond locks, noting how dirty they were getting and decide that I should wash him. Not only would it be better for his health to get clean, but this never failed to get a rise out of him. I drag his limp body from out of the covers and from the bed, and once I've entered the bathroom, realization hits him.
"No." He says, glaring at me with irritation. The 'no' is spoken so clearly that it's as if the other lifeless him was just a dream, or an illusion.
"You know I can't have you dirty." I respond sternly.
"I can wash myself, as I've told you many times before." He hisses, sitting on the ground and pulling away from me in defiance.
"And I've told you many times, I don't care if you can do it yourself, I'm still going to be the one to do it.(1)" I'm glad to hear his voice, even if it's for an argument, and it makes him look alive again. "Come on, undress."
"No." He says, arms crossed against his chest.
"Now." I say, a little more dangerously.
"No." He repeats. That sure was his favorite word, wasn't it?
I'm tiring of his defiance now, and I think of a way to make him comply, spotting the solution in his hands. Before he realizes what's happening, I've snatch away his blanket.
"Give it back!" He growls, launching himself at me in an attempt to retrieve the rag. Of course, there was no way he'd get it back like that.
"I'll give it back after." I tell him, and his face looks stricken with pain at the thought. Did this thing mean that much to him? "Better hurry before I change my mind." I warn.
I feel anxiety rolling off of him as he complies, eyes on the rag in desperation. Once he's fully undressed I turn on the bath water to warm, ordering him to climb in. He does so immediately, and I put the blanket on the sink so I can properly wash him. His eyes follow were the rag goes, and he completely ignores me as I scrub his body thoroughly. It seemed when it came the ratty thing, he was blind to everything else. How had I not noticed this during this whole year? Sure I could remember him having it, but I myself ignored it.
I move onto his hair, shampooing and conditioning it, having to force his head back before rinsing him off so he won't get soap in his eyes. Once that's over with, I drain the water and wrap him in a towel and pick him out of the bathtub and onto the counter. Deciding he's behaved enough, I hand him his blanket, to which he grabs immediately onto greedily. He was like a child in this sense, but it was cute I suppose in a way.
I dry him before handing him clothing to dress in from one of the cabinets. Another thing he disliked me to do for him, and I guess I could let him do it himself every once in a long while. Once he's dressed, I take the brush out of the sink drawer and begin to brush out the tangles in his hair. He's giving me an annoyed look, but stays silent possibly in fear that I'll take away his blanket again.
Finishing that task, I move on to the last one; brushing his teeth. This task was just like the feeding, unsure of his moods, and he could struggle in the process. I pull out his orange toothbrush and put toothpaste on it before commanding him to open his mouth. He does so after a slight hesitation, and used to the whole thing, he waits until I've brushed every last tooth before rinsing it out.
Deeming him finally clean, I throw his dirty clothes and towel in the hamper to wash later, and carry him once more the living room and onto his couch before settling across from him. From here he continues from where he left off yesterday, moping and looking at the ground.
My head is spinning, and I don't know what to do with myself anymore. How long have I been here? It feels like years, and I think I'm losing my mind. Why? Why am I here? Why won't he just kill me already? I can't take this anymore!
The only comfort I feel is from the purple blanket in my hands, my 'security,' but even that has lost much of its touch. How much longer would this life last? Forever? I didn't want to think about it.
I can feel his eyes on me, and though it bugs me, I don't grace him with a response. There was no point in getting angry because it would accomplish nothing, and I didn't want to waste my energy on such a useless thing.
That whole bathing thing was one of the worst routines here, besides the feeding, and no matter how much I protested, I wouldn't get my way. He even took away my blanket, and that was too devastating for words. Why would he do such a thing? This was mine, not his. I would not share this with him, especially because this was all I had left. (2)
Something sounds in the room, but I still refuse to look up, despite my curiosity. Sasuke moves, and I can hear him getting something from his pocket, indicating that the noise was most likely from a phone. He's quiet while the phone continues to ring, and confused, I look up to see why he hasn't answered it yet.
He seems to be almost shocked as he stares at the ringing phone, and once he regains his composure, he transports out of the house. Where was he going now? And what was making him look so scared? Was something bad going to happen? Well, who cared. I refocus my attention on the floor, trying to decide if I should just sleep once more to pass time as usual.
Sighing, I try to get comfortable on the couch, pressing myself against the cushioning and back facing the daemon once he returned. I can only hope he'll be gone for awhile with that phone call, but of course luck was definitely not on my side. Just as I began drifting off, he's back almost immediately, and he's far from being quiet.
I jump when he grabs my arm, not used to his rough touch. "Get up, we have to go. Now." Go? Go where? He's acting strange, and the look on his face seems nervous as he won't meet my gaze completely but instead is looking around as if searching for something. When I don't move, he pulls me up off the couch, almost making me trip. What was going on?
It was the last thing that I would have thought could happen. Uchiha's were very close for a daemon family, but I cut all ties with them a long time ago for when I found Naruto again. I never thought that I would hear from them again, especially because they were very upset that I had left them like Itachi had done a year before me. But unlike Itachi, I never went back to visit, possibly making all of them irritate and not wanting anything to do with me.
Which I could have lived with, but who would have known that one of them would try to push themselves back into my life. Naruto looked utterly frightened by my behavior, but I was like this because I worried for his safety. We had to leave this place now, but where did we go? I never made a backup house in case this one was ever found, and now I was regretting it. But who would have thought that I would have needed one? Damn Neji, how could he reveal where this place was to Itachi?
I stared in disbelief at the caller id on the phone. This had to be a joke. Why was he calling me? Why now? Transporting out of the house, I moved to a safe distance where I wouldn't be heard before answering the phone.
I don't get a chance to speak as he begins. "Little brother. It's been awhile." His voice is smooth and calm, the exact oppostie of what I'm feeling at the moment.
"What do you want?" I say rudely, trying to sound composed.
"No need to sound so angry, I'm only confirming something." Confirming what? I begin to ask before he interupts me, "I'll be visiting soon to have a little chat with your vampire friend."
"You stay away from him!" I growl, anger filling me. How did he know that I had Naruto now? I didn't think it'd be possible since I didn't allow the vampire to leave the house. But wait, if he already knew that I had Naruto, then what was he confirming? I voice the question and he's quiet on the other line for a moment.
"I believe it is a personal matter between me and Naruto." He knew his name as well? How? Where was he getting this information from? But even if he knew that, he would never find the house, since its outward appearance resembled a tree preciously. "Don't worry about directions, Neji has already informed me of your little tree. I'll see you soon, little brother." He says before the line goes dead.
I stare at the phone, not sure what just happened. Neji told him about the tree? That asshole! My blood boils at the thought, but an even bigger one pops into my head. Itachi knew about Naruto, knew his whereabouts, and was going to 'confirm something' with him. I had to get Naruto somewhere safe and fast.
Here. He was coming here, and I was running out of time. I had to get out of here with Naruto, but where? I look to the blond who is still looking at me curiously, and I sigh, deciding to just take him outside and we would just have to find a temporary place for now.
Holding onto him tightly, I transport us both out, and I see it is mid morning by now. The sun is up and shining bright, but something isn't right. I look at Naruto whose pulling at my grip in fear, his mouth twitching and was that.. Smoke coming from his skin?
I release him immediately, and he falls back and practically flies into the shade of a tree, cowering. He was burning in the sunlight. Why? Even if he was a normal vampire, he would already be the age limit to be in the sun. He seems just as shocked as I was, and he's shaking wildly as he stares at the sun in disbelief. Why was this happening now?
How was I supposed to take Naruto away if he couldn't even go n the sun? Fuck, I had to figure something out, and find a place where there would be enough shade to hide. And once we got there, I would have to find out the reason why the sun was suddenly Naruto's enemy.
The sun burned me? Why? I couldn't believe that such a thing happened… The sun that I had longed to see was betraying me, just like everything else in my life. My arm itches immensely from the burns, and I want to scratch them but then Sasuke would get angry.
Said daemon is pacing around, alert of everything little noise that makes itself heard. We left the house and came a forest, but why were we here? Something had scared him, which I didn't think was even possible, and now we were in what I could only guess was hiding.
Should I have been worried as well? The thought had occurred to me, but I couldn't muster enough energy to care. I watch Sasuke, who has stopped his pacing and his glaring at one of the bushes. Did he sense something? I follow his gaze, and there's a shadow of something, but I cannot tell what it is.
"Stay here." He says and he moves so fast, I don't believe how he could have been standing there only moments before. What was that shadow? Was it what had Sasuke all paranoid before? I sit silently as I wait for him to return, but there's a gnawing feeling in my chest.
Something was watching me, and I knew it wasn't Sasuke making sure I was not going to run away. I look up at the trees overhead, noting the way they blocked out the sun. A slight rustle catches my attention and I see someone who obviously wasn't Sasuke coming through. I knew this person, I know I did, but I couldn't place his name.
"Who are you?" I asked, curious because not many adults were out at this time of night. The man is just staring at me, but I don't mind, maybe he was shy.
"You're Naruto, am I correct?" He finally asked, and I nodded.
"Yes. But how do you know my name?" I didn't speak to any adults, and children I spoke to were rare, except for Sasuke of course.
"I've heard that you are friends with my brother." I stiffen at his words immediately. His brother? Sasuke? I look at him slowly and I see the resemblance immediately. Then he was a daemon too?
Cold chills run up my spine and I cant move, but the daemon doesn't show any emotion or make any movement towards me.
"Are you going to kill me?" I voice my question in almost a whisper, afraid of the answer. My hands are shaking as I study his face, looking for some type of indication to what my fate will be, but it's still set in that emotionless state.
"No, I'm just here to warn you." Warn me? About what? "You understand that Sasuke is a daemon, do you not?" I nod and he continues, "as a daemon, he has certain responsibilities, and while playing with a vampire is far from what he needs, I have allowed it for now."
For now? Did that mean that he didn't want me playing with Sasu anymore? He was my only friend, even if he was a daemon, and I would be lonely again. The thought makes me want to cry, and he must have sensed my thoughts.
"I am not saying that I will not allow you to see him again, but rather, I am here to say that maybe you should rethink the situation yourself." I don't understand, but before I can ask him to elaborate further, he turns and begins to walk away. "Just remember what I said. I'll come back to hear what you have to say." He adds before completely disappearing.
'Rethink the situation?' I don't know what that means, but did it have to do with me or Sasu, or both of us? And what would happen in the future? Another daemon knew of me now, and I couldn't trust him, could I? He said he wouldn't stop me from playing with Sasu, so that meant that he would not come back to kill me, right? He said he'd be back, but when? And what would happen when he did? I wasn't sure.
"You're Sasuke's brother." I say to the daemon who is standing in front of me, studying me with those critical eyes. Though he doesn't confirm it, I recognize him from when I met him as a child. He might have been older, but he still resembled Sasuke. He said that he'd be back, and I guess now he was. But was it to talk, or was he here for more serious business?
"You've grown since I have last seen you." He finally speaks, but I don't respond to him. We met when I was a child, only eight years old, but now I was considered an adult vampire, though I wasn't technically a vampire anymore, and was over two hundred years old.
Another presence is coming, and soon Sasuke is back, eyes red as a snarl rips from his throat. "Get away from him." His voice is even, but his body structure screams agitation. I watch as his brother doesn't seem at all bothered, or afraid, of Sasuke's presence, but instead very amused.
"I had hoped to keep you more occupied Sasuke, this is after all a private conversation between me and Naruto." A private conversation between me and him? Was that serious, or was he finally going to finish me off like he should have done when we first met?
"You will do no such thing, Itachi." Ah, so that was his name. I continue to watch Sasuke, not really sure what was going through his head at the moment. Was he really that angry? I suppose he would. He did consider me property after all, and the daemons tended to get very possessive of their things.
"I don't know what thing you are referring to little brother, but if you think I have come to hurt him, then you are mistaken." Then he really did want to talk? What about? Sasuke looks skeptical, and he doesn't seem to want to allow Itachi any nearer to me. I myself was a bit afraid, there were two daemons here and I was definitely not sure of what they would do.
"You're Sasuke's brother."
That's what Naruto had said to Itachi when I was still getting here. He knew him, but when did they meet, and how did Naruto survive? From what Neji had told me, Itachi had tried to get rid of him. And here he was, saying he wanted to 'talk' with Naruto.
"If you're so worried, then stay and listen." I look unsurely at him, he was much stronger than I was, so I wouldn't dare fight him. But why did he want to talk to Naruto? The question bugged me, but I guess I would just have to stay and listen.
"Fine." I tell him, and he returns his attention to Naruto, who in turn is looking a bit fearful. Did he know what this chat entailed? Something looked… different about Naruto. I've never noticed it, but in the outside air, despite there not being so much sun here, he seemed a bit strange.
"Do you remember what I've told you during our last meeting?" Itachi finally asks Naruto, and he nods. "But I can see that you didn't really take it to heart did you?"
"Take what to heart?" Naruto responds, and I'm a bit surprised that his voice came out so even.
"The fact that my brother was a daemon and you're still with him." He says, and I'm a bit confused. What had Itachi talked to Naruto about before? Was it about me?
"I can truthfully say that I did not understand what you've told me." Naruto pauses, seeming to be thinking about whether he should continue before he does, "until it was too late." So they were talking about our relationship? Why was that any business of Itachi's? I don't like the way they seem so comfortable chatting back and forth, and I want my brother to hurry up and get to the point of this talk and leave.
"Your arms." The sudden outburst makes me refocus on the two, and Itachi is touching the scars on Naruto, along with the burns that are still fresh. "Self feeding and sun burns." There's something in Itachi's eyes that I cannot read as he continues to study the marks, and I don't like it.
"If you're done talking, please go away brother." I growl, but he doesn't grace me with a response, and instead is speaking to Naruto once more.
"I thought this might happen, and despite all of it, you will continue to stay?"
"Not by choice." Naruto says this so low that I almost miss it, and I'm angry that Itachi was giving him ideas of being away from me again. He understood nothing of the things I had done in an attempt to find Naruto and to keep him with me.
Itachi releases my Canary's arm, and rises from the ground, turning to me. "What has Neji told you?" Neji? What did he have to do with the current situation? "When Neji took Naruto away from you, what did he tell you happened?"
I don't fully understand what he was talking about. He must know what Neji had said since he was the one who told him to do it. "Only that you sent him to rid Naruto from me and sell him to those auction houses." I can see in his eyes that this was the first that he's heard of this, but that only confuses me more.
"I see." Is all he says, and I want to question what that means. Did that mean that Neji had acted on his own? Or did someone else order him to do those things? I want to ask, but he's already changing the subject, "you need to have him treated as soon as possible." Treated? Who? Naruto?
I look to the blond, who is looking tired now from hunger, but his half lidded eyes are still on us in interest. He seemed just as unsure of the situation as I was, and the only one who appeared to be in the loop was Itachi.
"You havent realized it yet?" Realized what? I voice the question and he shakes his head. "How many times has Naruto been outside since you've gotten him back?"
"Zero." I say bluntly, and it was good wasn't it? He was burned by the sun, so that meant that he couldn't go anymore anyways.
"Then today didn't you notice he was burned? He was a child and able to go into the sun, so why not now?" As if I knew. I look at him in annoyance, did he know something I didn't?
"So what about it? Are you saying you know what's wrong with him?" I dislike being outside this long with Naruto, especially if he was ill.
"The blood you've fed him is contaminated." My eyes widen in surprise. How did he know that if I didn't? That had to be a lie. The blood I got him was perfectly clean and healthy. "You've been mixing it, have you not?" I nod. What was wrong with that? "Do you realize that there is a reason why humans don't transplant any kind of blood, but rather the one that matches their own?"
I did. Humans with O+ could donate to any other blood type except O-, and so on with other types, but what did that have to do with the conversation? "If a human receives B blood and their type is A, the body will reject it. The same thing happens to Vampires when they drink blood. Their blood must not be from different the other, or else they become unhealthy. They may even die after eating this way for a couple of months."
A couple of months? I've been feeding him this way for a year! This was a trick from Itachi, how could he possibly know all that? And even if it was true, why would he care? "You seem to be stuck on the idea that I am out to hurt you and your friend." He says, penetrating my thoughts.
I glare at him, not quite sure how to answer that. "Wouldn't you? I have no reason to trust you, especially after what happened." This conversation had run long enough, and Naruto is completely tuckered out. I move towards him, his eyes don't even comprehend what is happening as I lightly move his hair away from his eyes.
"Despite what you feel for him, there's something missing, don't you think?" I look at him, not sure of what he meant. "You have forced him to stay with you, thinking only of your selfish needs, but what about his? Have you never considered his feelings?"
"Of course I have. But what he and I want are two different things. I want him to stay with me, he wants to die. My way is better, don't you think?" I say stubbornly. And it was. If he died, I would lose him forever, and then my existence would be meaningless.
"He feels betrayed by you, did you realize that? He dreamt of the days when you were children when he was kept captive by those other daemons, and in his mind he constantly tried to figure what he had done wrong to make you abandon him." I listen carefully to his words, knowing if it involved dreams, then Itachi was an expert. "Did you know that Naruto never blamed you until you brought him back? He thinks that the reason you're keeping him is so you can humiliate him again."
That wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to make things better, not worse. Why couldn't Naruto realize that? Said blond wasn't even awake so that I could ask him. Where had I gone wrong? I only wanted what was best for him.
I turn to Itachi, but he's gone now. Looking up, I see the sun has already set, and it's time to go back to the tree now. Hiding didn't matter if Itachi had found us anyways, he was always a great tracker, and so there was no point in not returning to the tree.
Yesterday's events spin in my head, and the realization that the blood was not only gross but actually poisonous as well surprised me. Itachi said that it was deadly after a couple of months of consumption, and I was sure that I was eating it longer than that.
Sasuke was acting strange again. For once he allowed me to bath myself, and he kept leaving the house for hours at a time, and when he came back, he hardly looked at me. What was he up to? I myself am unsure of how to react to this behavior, but I guess I should have just ignored it. It didn't concern me anyways.
"We need to talk." I jump when I see that Sasuke has been standing in front of me, and there's a serious look on his face. He doesn't look angry, but there isn't really any emotion on his face. "Come on."
He motions for me to follow him, and I do after a slight hesitation, keeping my distance as he leads me to the bedroom. He shuts the door after I've entered and motions for me to sit on the bed. I do, but I feel anxiety rising up in me. Why did he close the door?
"Do you hate me?" I frown at the question. Why was he asking me this now? "Don't answer right away, even if you know for sure. Think about it long and hard."
I stay silent, thinking it over in my mind. Did I hate him? He took me away from the park as a child, and kept trapped in this house of his, but other than the occasional beating, it never escalated from there. It was what happened after I left where things became hellish. But did that make me hate Sasuek? When I was a child I might have said no, but things were different now. So many things had happened since then, and I wasn't sure naymore.
He himself had never raped me, at least not completely, and it seemed that he really was trying to rekindle something that we had long lost. Did I hate him? I only look sadly at Sasuke's face, which is nervous in its own way.
"Like I said, don't answer now." He turns and rummages in the closet before pulling out a metal box. Moving to me, he opens the box and pulls out a needle. I stare nervously at it, but calm myself down. "This is just some antibiotic to stop the bad blood from further contaminating your body." He explains, and I flinch as the needle pinches my skin.
Wiping it and putting on a band aide, he returns the metal box to the closet before sitting next to me. I stiffen, unsure of what he'll do. He's tenderly touching my hair, but is silent. Was that it? Could I go back to the living room now?
"I've been thinking about something for awhile, and I think I have finally come to a decision." I look at him, wondering what he was talking about. "After the antibiotic has done its job and you've regained the ability to go in the sun, and if you hate me, I'll let you go."
He'll what? Let me go? I study his face for an indication that this was a trick, but he still seemed serious. "I don't want you to be unhappy anymore, so even if it's what I don't want, I will allow you to live your own life from now on as long as you promise me one thing."
"Promise you what?" I ask when he stops, my voice shaky. I still don't fully believe him, and I am frightened of what is currently commencing.
"When I let you go, you have to promise that you'll forget everything that's happened to you. Live your life as if you've been reborn. I don't want you to kill yourself out of depression, so do this for me." His words sound sincere, and I'm speechless. I only nod slightly, unable to think of anything else to do.
We sit in silence together, him still touching my hair, me holding onto the blanket. What had brought this on so suddenly? Could it have been that talk with Itachi? What happened after I fell asleep? Something big most likely for such a development to occur.
"Do you remember when we were children, when you took care of that bird who broke its wing?(3)" I nod, remembering how indifferent he had been at the time.
"What about it?"
"I was the one who broke its wing." He did? But why? "I noticed how you would only drink the blood of injured animals, and because those were rare, you often looked as if you were starving. So I hurt that bird so that you would eat it, but instead you wanted to take care of it."
I don't answer waiting for him to continue. "That bird's wing was twisted badly, enough that I was sure it would never fly again, but somehow you allowed him to survive. You stayed with that bird day and night, caring for him and then one day, it got up and flew. At that moment, I was jealous because you paid more attention that animal than you did me." Jealous of a bird? That sounded just like Sasuke.
"But now, I realized something. You took the time to care for something that had nothing to do with you, and that was what I should have been doing. I want you to fly one again Naruto, so that you can feel the way that bird felt when you saved its life." Me fly again? That was absurd, such a petty metaphor was pointless now.
He was skeptical of my words, but I would make it happen. It had taken all day to come up with the idea of releasing him, and I wasn't satisfied with the thought. I didn't want to let him go, he was my dear mate. He was very important to me, but him staying here slowly dying wasn't good for him.
"If it's any consolation, I never meant for things to get out of control." I tell him, wrapping my arms around him. He doesn't flinch or stiffen, and just allows me to do what I want. Was what I telling him going in one ear and out the other?
"I don't hate you." I turn at him in surprise. He didn't? "But I don't forgive you either." He isn't looking at me, but I know there's inner turmoil in his eyes.
"I understand. I'm glad that you don't hate me though." I say, holding him close to me. He may not forgive me, but as long as there wasn't utter hatred, then maybe one day he would. That was what I could hope for in the future, even if you would be separated.
"That said, I have to know." His voice lowered by a degree, and I wait for him to continue. He turns to look up at me, and there's tears in his eyes. "Why did you let Neji take me away? Why did you abandon me? Was I not good enough?" The pain in his eyes is heart rendering, and I see now that he must have been living with these emotions since Neji took him.
"I didn't realize what Neji would have done to you. I was told you were set free, and I thought that you had started a new life without me." I tell him, holding him closer and gently stroking his hair. He doesn't believe me, I can tell by the look in his eyes. "I'm telling you the truth Naruto, if I had known, I would have never let you go through what you did."
"You're cruel. You didn't want me anymore, so you cast me out of your life and forced me to be alone again and endure such humiliation." He whimpers, and I don't know how to reassure him that what he thought was completely false. "Was it because I wasn't a real vampire? Because I wasn't good enough for you to be friends with?"
"Of course not Naruto, you know that isn't true. I was the one not good enough for you." And it was true, I had been such a lousy friend and soon turned into a fiend. How could allow anything to happen to my Canary, who I had pledged to protect with my life.
"You were the only one I had, and you betrayed me! I thought that my loneliness was finally cured, but then you kept me in a cage and left me, leaving me nothing! You ask if I hate you, but I think it was you that hated me!" He's beginning to get hysterically as the tears run down his face.
What could I say or do to calm him down? He wasn't listening to me anyways, so I had to show him. I grab onto his face and forcibly press my lips against his own. His whole body freezes before he tries to push me away, shaking his head. I pull him closer for a second longer before releasing him completely. "Naruto, why can't you see how important you are to me? You are not my friend because you are something more, you are my mate. I love you so much, and I only want to make you happy like when we were children." I tell him softly and he stares at me, a frown still adorning his face.
"I can't believe you, Sasuke. You're words and actions have always said differently." He says, eyes casting onto the floor. Even that didn't convince him? I didn't know what more I could do.
"What can I do to show you that that is the truth?" I ask him, desperate for an answer. "I've already told you that I will let you go, what else do you want from me?" No response. I sigh, and once more we sit in silence.
"Die." I turn to look at him in shock.
"Die. That's how you can prove what is true or not." I can't tell if he's serious or not. He wanted me to die? It was a request that I didn't ever think I'd hear, but if I did that, would forgive me?
If he died, would I be able to believe him? He was an old friend, the only one I had ever had, but now he was implying that we had a deeper connection. I couldn't believe such a thing. The only solution would be for him to die, and there was no way he'd be able to do that.
I watch as he gets up from the bed and to the door, opening and exiting from the room, I listen to his footsteps as they go into the living room. For a moment, I hear nothing. Suddenly, there's a loud crash, as if something just blew up, and I'm torn between going to see what it was and staying here.
With bated breath, I wait and when Sasuke re-enters the room, his right hand is bleeding. What did he do? I watch with worried eyes as he moves to the closet and takes out the metal box again. Bringing it to me, he places it beside me on the bed.
"You are to take one shot everyday for the next two weeks, and a pill from one of the orange containers twice a day, one in the morning and one at night for a month." What was he talking about?
"I've broken a hole in the living room so you can leave. Beginning tomorrow, you must hunt for your own food and be sure not to skip a meal if you ever want to regain your vampire traits again." Why was he telling me all this?
"Now, do you want to do it, or shall I?" He says, pulling out a knife from his pocket. I stare at him in disbelief. He was actually going to do it? And just because I asked?
When I didn't respond, he positioned the knife at his throat, but before he can plunge it into his neck, I smack it out of his hands.
"Idiot! You don't understand anything!" My body trembles as I take his bleeding hand and wrap it with my blanket.(4) "You never understand, do you?" My voice is shaking at the image of him killing himself runs through my head over and over again.
"Isn't that what you want?" There's a desperate look in his eyes, and I see that he really did believe me when I spoke those words. "What else can I do? Tell me and I will!"
"Killing yourself isn't going to solve anything." I growl in frustration. And he looks into my eyes, seriousness in them.
"But isn't that what you want to do?" Tears run down my face once more, and I don't know what to say. "You told me that you wanted to die on many occasions, so why shouldn't I?" My knees feel weak, and when they can't support me anymore, I sit onto the ground, still shaking.
He falls to his knees and gathers me into his arms, "I don't want to see you dead, so do you understand now? About everything?" I nod weakly, unable to get any words from my dry mouth. "Then please endure a bit longer until you're healthy and then you can leave, ok?"
Leave. Isn't that what I wanted all along? I shake my head, slowly, "I don't want to leave." His grip on me tightens a bit, and I don't know what it means. "I don't want to be alone anymore, Sasu."
"I know. And you won't have to. Whether you choose to stay or leave, I won't interfere anymore with what you decide." He says, and relief slightly fills me. What happened before was all in the past, even if it still hurt now. I just wanted to find my happiness again, I didn't want to suffer anymore.
Maybe now things would finally get better. And if we started anew, we would both be able to overcome the illness in our heart. It would be best, since this was after all our existence, not alone but together.
(1) Daemon obsession. They will very rarely allow their mates to do anything for themselves, which includes eating and bathing. P.s. that whole hygienic scene was long and terrible to write, but I had to show you how clingy Sasuke was…
(2) This made me laugh as I typed it. Naruto freaking loves his 'security!' He's as possessive towards it like Sasuke is possessive towards him.
(3) I wanted to include this is 'Demise,' but it just didn't fit. So I put it in here and I think it works. Correct me if I'm wrong.
(4) He shared… That is all. XD Well that was actually important, if you remember note (2).
And end. I hope it didn't' seem too rushed at the end because I actually spent the most time on that scene. I have never written a complete forgiveness fic, and it was very hard to do. How does one forgive someone who has wronged them so much? Bah, oh well. I also added Itachi to this story to show that he really meant no harm, and it was Neji all along we worked to get rid of Naruto on his own.
Did anyone notice why I named the fic 'Our Existence?' Well in case you didn't, it was very stupid haha. Naruto referred to it only as his existence, a doll, Sasuke saying his existence was pointless without Naruto, and finally, Naruto again, changing it to 'our existence,' meaning he had finally accept Sasuke as a part of his life. Yay!
Well, how was it? I think it's alright, but it is much shorter than 'Demise,' which was over 20,000, while this one is less than 10,000. Halfsies! I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed typing. This is good bye for now, Ja Ne!