Maura finally got the relief team up to date and headed to get cleaned up before heading home. The aftermath of the building collapse had not only sent many to the hospital but to the morgue as well. Maura instantly brought in help to relieve her already tired team. She knew the powers that be would want everything processed and the bodies released back to the families as quick as possible.
She knew that there would be a press conference tomorrow that she'd have to attend and dozens of families grieving for their loved ones waiting for answers. Maura usually didn't shower at work but on occasions like this, she was glad she had supplies to do so. After a hot shower and a quick hair and makeup job, she was in her car headed home by 11pm.
Maura thought about what an emotional day she had as she drove towards Beacon Hill. Hope reappearing in her life had brought out something in Maura she didn't know existed. She actually had said what she really felt and it was liberating, confusing, but liberating. Her thoughts quickly turned to Jane. She wished she could be honest with Jane and tell her how she truly felt. Rockmond had been a nice distraction from her growing feelings towards the Detective but the moment he pushed her into Jane's arms, it was all Maura could do to contain her feelings. Since then, it had been a daily battle to hide how she felt. She was the dutiful best friend when it came to Jane dealing with Casey but Maura was quickly coming to the end of her rope. Jane's behavior was so unJane like, so out of character. Maura found herself biting her tongue on more than one occasion. She thought she could tell Jane but, with how she felt about Jane, she wasn't sure if it was the' logical' Maura coming to this conclusion or the 'I'm in love with Jane' version. So she chose to remain neutral, the best friend at Jane's side being supportive.
Maura pulled into her driveway and immediately wondered why Jane's car was there. She's probably with Angela they've had a long day too with Tommy's head injury. I'm so exhausted, I'll just leave them be till tomorrow. Maura made her way to her front door and just as she was about to put the key in the lock, the door swung open revealing Jane holding a glass of wine smiling brightly, her trusty dog at her feet, prancing about.
"Hey, hope you don't mind, I knew you would be late so I came to make sure you ate a little something and I took care of Bass." Jane said proudly taking Maura's things and hands her the glass of wine.
"Not at all, you're correct, I haven't eaten in quite a while, thank you." The two smiled and Jane began to put her things up and made her way back to the kitchen followed by Maura who stopped to greet Jo.
She leant down pet her with both hands, she loved having a dog, even though it wasn't really her dog, it was close enough. "And how is my pretty little princess, is your mommy taking good care of you too?" Maura said in the little voice she only reserved for her pets.
"Yes Mommy Maura, I missed you. Ma has been worried 'bout you. I've been a good little princess. Can I have a treat?" Jo said knowing Maura couldn't understand but it didn't mean she'd ever stop trying.
"Have you fed her? She looks hungry." Maura asks making her way to Bass.
"Of course I did, when I fed your turtle." Jane smirks. Wait for it….
They both smiled.
Jo trots by Bass on her way to the couch "I'm a pretty princess," she gloats sticking out her tongue. Bass rolls his eyes and turns his attention to his quickly approaching owner.
Maura bends to Bass and strokes his shell "How is my handsome prince? Did you enjoy your dinner? Jane didn't give you too many strawberries like usual did she?"
"No mother. She gave me what you usually do. Surprising, I know. She even petted me. Too bad she had to bring that infernal dog!" Bass offered to deaf ears, well almost.
"I heard that." Jo said from her comfy spot on the couch.
"I'm a handsome prince!" he called back. Jo huffed and lay back down. Bass slowly made his way towards the kitchen.
"For your information, no, he had his usual." Jane sneered. "For you, because it's late, I made one of your fancy shmancy salads you like." Jane grinned.
Maura made her way to the island and sat opposite of Jane and inspected her meal.
"I'm impressed. It looks fabulous Jane, thank you." Maura smiled.
Jane reached across and took Maura's hand. "It's the least I could do, you helped me save my family and Frost, plus I know you had a hard night and tomorrow will be just as long." Jane said with concern.
Maura pulled her hand away quickly, too tired to try to hide how much she just wanted to be held by Jane and melt into her embrace. She pulled away too quickly, Jane noticed.
"You okay Maur?"
"Yes, I'm exhausted but I'm glad your here." Maura deflected.
The two ate in silence for a moment before Jane broke the silence. "So, I went and talked to Casey, like you suggested, well before all hell broke loose. I was actually with him when I got the call." Jane offered wanting to talk about what Casey had said. Maura sighed, she really didn't want to talk about Casey. She had more than enough but as always, she was there for Jane.
"That's why he showed up at the scene?"
"Yea, I kinda ran off leaving him behind 'cause I couldn't wait for him, which I said, out loud, to him. I felt like such an ass but it was the truth. He wanted to make sure everyone was ok. Basically he made it clear, it was his choice."
"So I guess you didn't get through to him earlier? What did you say?" Maura queried.
"I told him that it didn't matter, that I loved him and that we could be happy, it didn't matter if he was disabled or not. He said it wasn't just that. He couldn't 'feel' me, you know, like if we…" Jane took a deep breath, "during sex."
That was it, something in Maura snapped, like earlier with Hope. She slammed down her fork and pushed her plate away. She glared at Jane, "That is absolutely the most selfish thing I have ever heard."
The look on Jane's face hardened, "I…that's a little harsh don't you think…he is the man I love…you just can't…"
Maura cut Jane off. "You love him! Really Jane? How? Explain it to me. Have you even gone out on a date with him?"
Jane was shocked, "I…well no, not really but what's that matter? You can love someone without dating them, what's with you?"
"All of this is out of character Jane, this pining after Casey. So just tell me. Explain it, Jane! Why do you love him?" Maura asks harshly.
"What do you mean, why? I…I…I just do." Jane defended.
"You just do!? That's all you got?" Maura drilled.
"That's all I need!" Jane defended. She angrily grabbed her beer and took a long drawl.
"You can't give one reason, one thing about him that you love?" Maura was almost yelling.
Jane thought for a moment, she understood what Maura was asking but she just didn't have the answers. Maura could see Jane thinking, struggling with what to say next. Maura didn't know what come over her but she wasn't finished yet.
"Do you want to know why I love you Jane? It's not just because you're brave, intelligent, funny and fiercely protective over the ones you love. It's everything Jane!" Jane eyes grew wide as Maura continued.
"I love that you call my wine Cabernet sa-blah-blah or how you call Bass a turtle even though you know he is a tortoise."
"You tell her mother." Bass encouraged. Maura continued.
"The way your eye brow crooks up when you're confused or you say something sarcastic, which is ninety percent of the time. How you just have to do the things I tell you 'you shouldn't', yes I knew you just had to touch that sculpture behind my back. I love all the little hidden snacks around my house that you don't think I don't know about. Really, Jane, a Moon Pie in my Aalto Vase."
Jane listening intently managed to shrug a 'sorry did you expect anything less' look. Maura looked down at Jane's hands and reached for them and gently rubbed her thumbs over Jane's scars and breathlessly said, "And the way you let me, and only me touch your hands, your scars." Maura trailed off as the warmth of Jane's hands soothed her. She looked up and locked eyes with Jane. For a moment she thought Jane understood, that she finally knew how Maura felt, then Jane cocked her head sideways with a confused look. Maura let go of Jane's hands, almost throwing them back at her. She reached over, not breaking her now glare at Jane, grabbed her wine and downed the entire glass. She pushed herself away from the island and made her way around to where Jane still sat staring blankly forward trying to process all that Maura had said. She quickly spun Jane around and grabbed two fists full of shirt and pulled Jane into a kiss. Maura let all the passion she had pent up pour out in that kiss. Jane's hands clenched around Maura's wrists but didn't attempt to pull them off. Just as Jane's hands loosened and she began to melt into the kiss, Maura pushed her back. She released one hand and began to drag Jane towards the door.
"Maura, what the hell are you doing? What's going on?"
Maura opened the door with her free hand and forcefully hurled Jane out of the front door. Jane staggered and quickly spun back around locking eyes with Maura.
"I have given you enough information, you're the Detective, figure it out!" With that Maura slammed the door in Jane's face and clicked the dead bolt. She turned and walked back to the island and picked up the bottle of wine and filled her glass. She looked down at Bass, "That's either the smartest or most stupid thing I have done. The ball is in her field now." Maura took a long drink, grabbed the bottle and headed to the couch.
"Court, mother, ball in her court." Bass corrected as he slowly followed.
Jane stood staring at the door just inches from her face. She raised her fingers to her lips and gently touched them. She turned and looked at her car the to the guest house. Without thinking her body began to make the journey across the yard to the guest house. She tried the knob and the door clicked open. She entered and made a beeline to the fridge.
Angela's head popped over the top of the couch to see Jane walking into the kitchen. "Janie?" she called. Jane ignored her mother and opened the fridge and yanked out a beer and downed it in one long drawl.
Angela got up and made her way to the kitchen, "Jane, honey are you okay?"
"She…she kissed me," was all Jane said without turning around.
Angela heard what she said and knew who 'she' was. She had seen it coming for quite a while. When Casey had shown back up, she was surprised how Jane had jumped back in with two feet. It was so unlike her. She thought Jane was beginning to see what had been right in front of her face all this time. Angela asked the obvious question. "Who kissed you?"
Jane turned, "She kissed me!"
Angela sighed it was going to be a long night. "So I gather dear but who kissed you?" She asked again.
"She kissed me, Ma." Jane repeated mindlessly.
"I think we've covered that. Let's go sit on the couch and you can start at the beginning." Angela grabbed two beers from the fridge and led Jane to the couch. She cracked both beers and handed one to Jane who instantly tried to down the whole thing. "Oh no you don't." Angela grabbed the beer away and set it on the coffee table evoking a sneer from Jane. "So, Maura kissed you."
Jane's head snapped so quickly towards Angela she thought Jane gave herself whiplash.
"How…How did you know it was her?" Jane asked totally surprised.
"You spend ninety percent of your time with her, who else would it be? What happened?"
"Maura freaked out when I told her part of the reason Casey was going ahead with the surgery was because…" Jane paused, when she remembered she was talking with her mother.
"Because of what?"
Jane took a deep, "Because he can't feel me." Jane saw her mother's confused looked. "Come on, like during sex, geez."
"Oh…OH! We'll that's selfish don't you think? Typical man if you ask me, always thinking their…"
"MA! OH MY GOD! REALLY, why am I even here?" Jane turned went to stand. Angela stopped her.
"Jane, I'm sorry, please go on."
Jane grumbled under her breath and continued. "Maura said basically the same thing, about him being selfish. Then it was like she just started berating me. Saying how I wasn't myself and questioning whether or not I really love Casey."
"Do you?" Angela questioned.
"Ma, do you want to hear this or not?" Jane was clearly agitated. "Sorry, I won't interrupt again"
Jane stood and began to pace. "Maura asked me to tell her why I loved him. What it was about him that I loved. I…I didn't answer, I didn't know the answer. She started to tell me things she loved about me. Like how I call Bass a turtle just to get her to say Tortoise. Like how I always mispronounce her wines so she'll give me that look. How I hide sweets all over her house, thinking she has no clue." Jane looks at her hands and rubs them. Her tone softens, "The way I only let her touch my hands, I love how gently she caresses them, she takes the pain away. I eat salads and vegetables just to see her smile." Angela smiles now listening to Jane's list not Maura's. She doesn't even hear herself. She'll catch on in about 3…2…
"I love how she gets slang wrong and how excited she gets when I take her to experience new simple things, like going to a fair or eating street food. I love the look of excitement on her face like a kid experiencing it for the first time. I love…I love…"
And 1. Kaboom!
Jane staggered back and plopped down in the chair and looked up at her mother with amazement in her eyes.
"I love Maura."
Angela smiled and stood and walked over to Jane and stood her up. She gave her a hug and for once, Jane didn't pull away. Angela broke the hug and Jane looked at her once more, "I love Maura."
"Yes dear, I gathered that." Angela wrapped her arm around Jane's shoulder and led Jane to the front door. They stopped at the door and Angela opened it.
Angela sighed again, "Yes, we've covered that, now go tell her that."
Jane snapped out her trance, "What?! What do I say? What if she won't talk to me? What if she doesn't love me?" Jane blurts out in a panic.
"She loves you anyone who has spent more than fifteen minutes in the same room with you two can see that." Jane's jaw dropped as Angela continued, "She'll talk to you, she made the first move Jane, it's up to you now. I can't tell you what to say only you can tell her how you feel. Just say what's in your heart."
"But Ma, I don't know what to do."
Angela knows that there's a time in every mother's life when they have to let their children stand on their own. With Jane she never had that moment, the moment that a mother bird kicks her baby out of the nest so it can learn to fly, until now. Angela pushed Jane out the door and Jane tripped forward and quickly spun back around. "You're a detective Jane, I'm sure you'll figure it out." Angela slammed the door, turned the deadbolt and shut off the light and went to bed.
Jane stomped her feet and spun around towards Maura's house, "Oh come on, what's with the doors in the face, that's twice now." Jane slowly walked to Maura's front door and raises her hand to knock. Her hand is trembling out of control. She catches it with her other and paces back and forth on Maura's porch and mumbles to herself trying to get the courage to knock. Maura notices the flicker and looks to see Jane frantically pacing back and forth on her front porch. Maura calmly stands and goes to freshen herself up. She comes back out and straights her dress one more time.
"Do I look okay Bass?"
"Ravishing as always mother." Bass compliments.
"Looks like I'm about to find out one way or the other if she's figured it out or not. By the pacing, I think she has. What if she doesn't love me?"
"She loves you mother." Bass replies
"I wish you could talk Bass."
"I wish you could understand me mother." Bass knew full well humans stopped listening nature a long time ago.
Finally Jane knocked. Maura picked up her glass and downed the contents and walked to and opened the door. Jane strode in not even looking at Maura and went and stood by the island staring blindly at the counter. Maura walked over to Jane and stood behind her. Jane slowly turned and caught Maura's gaze. God she is so beautiful. How could I have been so blind all this time? Will she believe me when I tell her I love her, after all this, after how I acted over Casey.
Jane didn't know how to start, didn't what to say. 'Listen to your heart.' echoed in her mind. Her heart was screaming at her what to do. Jane reached for Maura and slid her hand behind her neck and pulled her lips gently to her own. Maura wasn't expecting this but she wasn't going to fight it that was for certain. Jane's head began to spin, she turned Maura around and backed her against the island and hung on to it to steady herself. When their tongues danced together Jane regretted every minute she let slip away. All the mornings she could have woke up with Maura in her arms. Everything was so crystal clear now. She tenderly ended the kiss and slid her lips next to Maura's ear and placed a soft kiss.
"How long?" she softly asked. Maura tilted her head back giving Jane more access and she immediately began to kiss down her neck.
"I wasn't sure until the moment Rockmond threw me into your arms. I was ignoring it, passing it off, explaining it away. When you held me, it was if I was seeing everything, feeling it, for the first time. I knew that I was in love with you."
Jane drew back and kissed her once more. It was short, tender, and reassuring. "I'm so sorry Maura. I've been so blind, so stupid. I talked myself into thinking I was in love with Casey because I had all these feelings building up. It was easier for them to be for Casey, deep inside I knew it was always you. You're the one I'm in love with. How can I ever make it up to? For being so stupid. For putting you through Casey"
Maura drew Jane forward into a blistering kiss leaving both breathless. "I can think of a few ways you can make it up to me Detective." Maura smiled seductively.
Jane smiled brightly, "Is that a proposition Doctor?"
Maura gently pushed Jane off her. She started to walk towards the bedroom. She reached behind her and unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor as she stepped around the corner. She leant back around the corner to the stunned Jane, "That Detective is a proposition." Maura disappeared around the corner once more.
Jane went to take a step and almost stepped on Bass. Bass hissed at her. Jane bent down, "I promise Bass. I won't ever hurt her again." Jane stood up and quickly went to the kitchen and grabbed Bass's plate and placed a few strawberries on it. She walked back over and placed it in front of him. "Forgive me, okay buddy." She patted him on the head and watched him dig into the strawberries.
"I forgive you. Now don't keep mother waiting." Bass says enjoying his treat. Jane turns and dashes off as if she understood what he had said.
Jo stood and stretched and shook, jumped down from her warm spot on the couch, having missed all the action. She walked over to Bass, "How come you got a treat?" she huffed.
"Because mommy's love me best." Bass beamed enjoying his treat.
"Stupid strawberries, stupid turtle." Jo growled
"Tortoise!" Bass corrected
Jo rolled her eyes. "Whatever!" and returned to her spot on the couch.
I had this One-Shot stuck in my head and had to get it out before I finish Bring Me Some Water. I guess I was a little pissed with how they made Jane beg for Casey, and the "feel you" thing, don't even get me started on that. It wasn't in her character to act that way, yes you can show she is human, feminine and can love but once they had her beg like a blithering idot, I was done. This isn't a lesbian hate thing either, Kate and Castle from Castle are my favorite couple. They have shown you can get a couple together and the show doesn't fizzle and die. Point being my crankiness with Janes character, lead to Maura being pissed too. Hopefully they will continue to let her discover her newfound voice and for Gods sakes give Jane back her Moxie. Okay….getting off soap box…as always, thanks for reading, I don't own crap don't sue me and junk. Please let me know what you think.