You haven't ever had a true home before. Alone. That's what you are, but it isn't always what you want to be. Sometimes you still wish your parents would come up in a big bus and take all the kids home. So they can have a family and a home. So they can have a place to go, somewhere they're always welcome.
You wonder what goes through other people's minds on Christmas. They all go to their homes, their families, their warm places. Their places they're always welcome. You stand out in the cold. Alone. Sometimes you fear you'll freeze. Then someone invites you in.
What do you do? You've always been on the outside. A part of you even believes you belong there, but you know that can't be true. Everyone needs a home they belong in, a family they belong with. Why are you the puzzle piece that doesn't fit anywhere?
That's not true. Alone, yes, but it's your fault. They made you realize what you were missing. They made you long for the warmth of a home, a place you are always welcome.
You never had many friends, not even when you were little. Maybe you used to have a few, but things happened. Things always happen. Then there they are. You don't know why, but you think they're different. They invite you in. You accept.
You should have known it was too good to be true. Things like this don't happen to you.
They get torn away from you, but you try to dull the pain. You distance yourself. You've had enough practice. That plan goes to hell, and soon you're standing in front of the thing that will take you away from the only home you've ever known, the only family you've ever loved. The only place you've ever belonged.
There are tears in your eyes as you kiss goodbye the men who helped you until your last day. The men who gave you your first true home, who loved you. The men you won't recognize next time you see them. The tears roll down your cheeks as you say goodbye to this small town for what you know won't be the last time.