Hey folks! I'm back! This was just a little one-shot that occurred to me last night. For those of you that have been following my other Hetalia stuff, I promise, there's more in the works. I got some big projects coming up - just check my profile. But while I work on that, here's this. :D
April 23, 1930
As the shadows in the street began to vanish, America looked up at the sky, squinting slightly. Looked like the sun was vanishing behind some clouds.
He coughed into his sleeve, wishing he could shake the headache that he'd been privileged to since last October. Whether it was from the economy itself or merely from all the other nations' anger, he wasn't positive.
Didn't really matter either way.
Sure, there were some bright spots. If you thought really really hard. Probably.
Okay, he'd admit that his reason for being out here in California was actually pretty cool. Touring the new Warner Brothers studios... it was nice to see something... happy... taking root. Cartoons were happy, right?
America knew England would probably laugh at him for them - psh, he was just jealous - but that was okay. Animation was really awesome. His people would get better at it, and soon the whole world would be enjoying American shorts. Maybe even movies!
Well, as soon as they stopped hating him, that was.
...No, England wouldn't be teasing him for goofy characters, he thought sadly. The older nation would be more likely to berate him over being the "idiot of the world". Wasn't that the phrase he'd heard at the last World Conference?
"Stupid," he muttered under his breath, falling into another coughing fit. As if to add insult to injury - the joys of being a national personification.
"Stupid," cough, "stupid," cough, "stupid..."
"That seems awfully harsh. This wall is an excellent barrier, and I don't think it appreciates your comments on its job. Or are you just referring to the security guard? Because then, I wholeheartedly agree."
America glanced wildly about, trying to pinpoint the source of this voice. His eyes landed on a black-and-white figure lazily sitting on the nearby wall. Two smaller ones sat next to him, their furry faces and bizarre feature giving away their identities as three of the new "toons", as he'd heard them called.
"...Nope. Just myself," he said, resuming walking.
"Ooh, lookit Mr. Emotional over here," the toon said, gesturing out with a gloved hand. "That was about the lamest answer you could give."
"And you are...?" America snapped. His headache was growing stronger.
The toon smiled. "Currently, sitting on a wall."
America didn't respond.
The character sighed. "Yakko Warner, at your service. And these two are my siblings, Wakko and-"
"Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fana Bo Besca III. But you can call me Dot."
"A pleasure," America said, wishing he were in a better mood - heck, he was practically talking to a product of American technology! Shouldn't he feel... prouder or something?
"Uh-uh-uh," Yakko said, wagging a finger. "You need to tell us your name."
"Alfred. Alfred F. Jones."
"What does the 'F' stand for?" the middle sibling asked. Alfred was surprised to hear a heavy accent similar to the one England occasionally slipped into after a few too many drinks.
"Um... forget about it."
"That is a weird name," said Dot.
"But it isn't my - oh, look who's talking! How long was yours again?"
"Hmph. I told you, call me Dot." The little girl thought for a moment, absentmindedly playing with her flower.
"But call me Dottie and you die."
After a bit of an awkward silence, Wakko turned to America.
"So why're you so down?"
America shrugged, then coughed. "Why not? Think many people are happy right now? Just take a look at the economy. I mean, things couldn't exactly get much worse..." ...and it's all my fault, he added silently to himself.
"Aaaand... who cares, again?" Yakko said.
"I said who cares? Sure, it's not so hot right now, but that doesn't mean anything. Things'll get better in time."
"Yeah right. We're screwed. The world thinks I - we're, thinks we're stupid now. The country's a failure!"
"Aw, no it isn't. C'mon, we've still got some good stuff. Help me think of some "
America's face fell even further, and he coughed again.
"...Just kidding! Sheesh... But seriously, there's stuff like... the Constitution! Right?"
"I guess so..."
"And lots of inventions!" Dot chimed in.
"And corndogs," Wakko said in all seriousness.
"...Okay, you got me there. Corndogs are pretty sweet."
"Just wait until we get McDonald's," Yakko grinned.
"Nothing, nothing. You'll figure it out pretty quickly."
"And this is important because...?"
Dot smacked her forehead. "Have you caught nothing?"
"Just look at it this way, buddy. This is a little... ehhh... speedbump. Someday you'll look back at laugh at it all." Yakko said.
America pulled away, angry. "Laugh? Are you kidding me? Poverty, hunger... the country is a dump!"
"-It used to... used to be so great. Roaring twenties and all that jazz."
"Literally," said Yakko.
"Jazz. Jazz. You really aren't doing so hot. Just wait till the seventies. I promise, things get plenty weird again."
"You don't know that!" America said, falling into another coughing fit.
"Actually I happen to-" Yakko began. Dot cut him off.
"-All we're saying is you gotta cheer up, kay? And get yourself some cough medicine, kid."
"Cherry flavored is the best," Wakko said solemnly. "Great on ice cream."
"...I'll keep that in mind, then." America said, no longer entirely sarcastically. Something about these kids was inherently cheering. (Most would actually call it "impossible", but he himself had been the "impossible" one himself enough to rather enjoy it.) He flashed the kids a smile, something that hadn't happened for quite a while.
"I'll keep that in mind."
He turned to walk away, but thought better of it and faced them once more.
Leaning against the wall Yakko smiled back. "No problem. Right sibs?" Looking straight at America, he nodded. "Now I'm sure you have places to be... Alfred... so unless you'd like to be our Special Friend, I'd suggest getting there."
America looked down at his watch, something he had started wearing only recently. Well, if the mid-20's were recent enough.
"Shoot! I have a meeting to get to with Japa- I mean, a friend." He nodded in thanks again. "See you around."
And with those words, the young nation clamped one head down on his hat and dashed down the street.
As America vanished, the Warners grinned at each other.
"Mission accomplished - sorta," said Yakko. "You were right, Dot."
"Hellooo, national personification..." Dot said, causing her brothers to roll their eyes. "Oh, come on. You gotta admit..."
"If you like 500 year olds."
Wakko looked thoughtful. "I think I'm going to write a song for him."
"Wait for Alaska and Hawaii," Yakko advised.
"I just hope we didn't rattle him too badly," Dot said.
"Psh, he can take the Civil War, he can take us," Yakko said.
"Speaking if the Civil War, I heard Lincoln needed some help with his address."
"Why? Isn't it 1600 Pennsylvania-"
"-Shoot, the guards are coming. Why do I get the feeling Abe's gonna have to wait?"
"I dunno. But I think it's time to vamoose..."
"Well put. We should remember that one."
...Okay, I'll admit to some pretty shameless references here. I try to avoid resorting to old, stereotypical jokes for humor, but they... they beckoned me.
The title, of course, comes from the Wakko's Wish song, which proved surprisingly relevant to this story. Check it out it you don't know it (or need a refresher) and see how many references you can pull out. (There's a lot of dialogue echos. Maybe they were thinking about their buddy America while they worked on the movie. xD)
So, some historical reference. (What? This is a chipmunk fic. This is how I roll... *pushes up geeky glasses*) I chose the date for several reasons. (1) It was obviously Depression Era, (2) it works in the Warner Era, pre-water tower lock-up but post creation, and (3) it was specifically a few days after the creation of the first, real Looney Tunes cartoon, giving me an excuse to get mopey America's butt down to California, and specifically the Warner animation studios.
I feel like everybody might be a bit OOC, but this isn't exactly my most serious work. It was just for fun. :) That being said, though, I'd really appreciate any faves or reviews - it's all good practice for the big stuff.
I'm going to try to put up some of my current projects on my profile, so followers (there are a few of you :D) and others, feel free to check it out. I promise, I'm far from gone. Just took an after-Christmas hiatus.