Thank you, everyone for your patience while my r/l was going crazy! I love each and every follow, favorite, and review…they all make me smile!

So much thanks to hapakids, teamhotmen, and flamingpen18…for betaing, prereading, and basically putting up with my crazy ass!

EPOV

Bella and I finally passed out somewhere around 6:30 in the morning. She had such a long week, ending with Aro's funeral yesterday. When she asked me to distract her, I took that job very seriously. She had cum no less than ten times. My tongue, fingers, and cock all got their turns with her. Let's just say that I'm a very happy man at the moment, especially since we continued after a few hours of sleep.

We're meeting Liam, Siobhan, and Alistair at the club in about an hour. Siobhan, Rose, Alice, Bella, and my mother are all going to be there. I seriously hope that Tanya doesn't make the very fatal error of showing her face tonight. If she does show up, I know that there is no way in hell that she won't try to start some shit. And if I know these five ladies, they are all hoping for the same thing. They all want to put the bitch in her place...in the dumpster with the rest of the trash.

The line for the club was as long as it always is. I wanted to go in the front, simply to remind the bouncer at the door that I have VIP guests coming tonight. Fortunately for him, he not only remembered that fact but also their names.

"I would like to be informed immediately if Tanya Denali shows up tonight."

"Sure thing, Boss," the bouncer, Mikey, replied. He winked at me before adding in a whisper that only I could hear. "Have to keep the wife and mistress separated, aye?"

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? MY WIFE IS THE ONLY WOMAN IN MY LIFE. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, MAKING A COMMENT LIKE THAT? GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CLUB. YOU ARE FIRED! JUST BE GLAD YOU'RE LEAVING WITH YOUR LIFE!" I roared at him.

"Geesh, I'm just saying. Tanya made it clear yesterday that your relationship needs to stay on the hush-hush. I was only letting you know that I got the memo!"

"Tanya is a lying, scheming, disease-ridden liar. She is not now, nor was she ever my 'mistress'." I was beginning to calm down. He had been played by Tanya also. "Listen, you're not fired but don't believe another word that comes out of her mouth. She's a desperate whore, and she played you for a fool. After tonight, she is permanently banned from this club, if she's stupid enough to show her face again. Just watch for her and do not fall for any more of her lies. We clear?"

"Crystal. For the record, she handed me a note that stated she was to be treated like the 'princess' she is and given platinum service, whatever the fuck that is. It sure as fuck looked like your writing. It's hanging in the kitchen so all the employees are aware of her 'status'." I stormed through the club and into the kitchen.

"Where the fuck is this note that I supposedly wrote?"

One of the waitresses pointed meekly to the bulletin board.

TO ALL STAFF:

Miss Tanya Denali is, from this day forward, is to be treated with the utmost respect as her absolute beauty demands. I have granted her the platinum V.I.P. status within this club. I want every single one of you to be at your most diligent performance possible when attending to her needs, wants, and desires within this club. Anyone who does not treat Miss Denali as the Beauty personified gentle Princess that she is can leave now. I will only hire staff that will follow her and my directions without question. Furthermore, there is to be no mention of this notification in the event that my so called wife is present. Miss Denali is my one true love. Anyone who makes mention of this to her will be dealt with swiftly and permanently!

Edward A. Cullen

Your Boss.

By the time that I finished reading this rubbish, I was laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe. Nobody in my family had heard the altercation I had with Mikey, and they were all currently looking at me as if I had grown a second head. I couldn't speak, so I just handed the letter to the person who was closest to me, which happened to be Bella. By the time she finished reading it, she was laughing as hard as I was, as was everyone else by the time it had made the rounds.

''You know, dude, this really does look like your writing. She must have managed to steal something with your writing to get it this good," Jasper commented. "I mean, really, other than the ridiculous wording, even I may have fallen for it. I can see how the staff did. We better be careful, because if she's able to get people to believe this shit, she could cause some real problems."

"You're right." I took out my phone and called Tiny to let him know not to believe any correspondence delivered by Tanya. She has never, and never will have any type of access to that building.

"So what are we going to do about this?" Emmett asked with a devious look in his eyes.

The waitress, Michelle, was the one to speak up.

"Can I start by saying that I am so glad that was a fake? I spent the day job hunting, because I had no intention of treating her like a 'princess'. May I offer a suggestion?" I motioned for her to continue. "I say we give her exactly what she wants. You have the staff cater to her. As the night progresses, we can get increasingly more 'clumsy'. She'll throw a fit as usual and threaten us. Can your party stay hidden in the VIP lounge? As soon as she starts, you can make your presence known."

"Babe, you really should give her a raise," Bella said with a smirk.

Ten minutes later, we were in the VIP lounge when Michelle came in stating that Tanya had, in fact, shown up. Seconds later, we could hear her screeching in the hallway outside the door.

"What do you mean I can't go into the VIP lounge? I have platinum service. I can go anywhere."

"Not this evening, Miss Denali. The VIP lounge is closed for a private party. It was booked weeks ago, and Mr. Cullen himself told us that no one but his personal waitress is to go in there. It's some kind of meeting."

"Is my Eddie Poo in there?"

"No, but he did make the reservation himself. Maybe he's planning on coming later?"

"Well, just make sure that that damn waitresses in here knows that I'm not to be kept waiting. If he's coming for a meeting, that means he'll be by himself, just his men no little wifey. I just know that he'll be taking me to his office when he's done, and you wouldn't want me to give him a bad report. Now, would you?"

"No, Ma'am".

"I'll be in the restroom, freshening up for my man. Have someone let me know if he gets here, before I return to my table. And have a bottle of your most expensive champagne brought to my table." We could hear her heels as she retreated.

"Michelle, get an empty bottle of top shelf champagne, fill it with club soda, and then add some cider vinegar to it. Use that for her. Have the bartender put a small amount of ginger ale in a tester's glass for you and make her think that you just poured it. Tell her that it is my favorite, the best money can buy. Have security aim the CCTV at her table. I want to be able to see her reaction when she tries it." I hadn't heard the door open, so Liam startled me when he began laughing.

"You know, she doesn't know us from Adam. We could get her talking, pretend to be sympathetic. Then you and the missus come in with the family, and we'll let her know we're your friends."

This is what I like about these three. They all hate people who are pretentious and full of their own self-worth.

"Oh, this will be so much fun. I just love putting whores like her in their place. I haven't had a chance to do this since before Mary was born." Siobhan looked genuinely excited to do this. "I'll even have my phone on so you guys can listen in."

She called my phone to make the connection before they left the room. I put my phone on speaker, and we all gathered around it to listen to the show. Siobhan started. "I can't believe the nerve of her. Thinking she's better than anyone else."

We heard Tanya snort. "Yeah, I know someone just like that. She thinks she can just waltz right on in and steal my man. My father had promised him to me." She addressed Michelle. "What are you doing just standing there? Taste test my champagne and leave."

"As you wish." We could hear the sarcasm in Michelle's voice. "Perfect, exactly like Mr. Cullen likes his champagne. He always says that only people of impeccable taste can truly appreciate this vintage."

"Wonderful. I'm sure I'll enjoy it then. Be gone, serving person. I'll let you know when I want something."

"Oh, you must be a very important person. That is a wonderful year. I don't know how the winery manages it, but the flavor melds with the drinkers for people who are beautiful both inside and out. It tastes like the most succulent berries. However, it is reminiscent of cider for those who are ugly." Liam was having too much fun with this. He was pulling a 'The Empire's New Clothes' on her. Tanya must have tasted it, because she started to gag.

"Oh, my. Did you not enjoy that?" Alistair asked.

Tanya coughed again before saying, "You are so", cough, "so right. Berries."

"You must know the owner of this fine establishment to be graced with such an honorable gift as this wine."

"Oh, yes. Eddie and I go way back. He was forced to marry wwaaayyyyy beneath himself, but we maintain a very close relationship."

"Yes, we had the opportunity to meet them today. We are in town for Aro's funeral. However, we didn't get the chance to speak directly with them. She was too busy, occupying all of Mr. Cullen's time."

"Yes, we had business to discuss, and she wouldn't leave him be."

"I know. She forced him to end his engagement to me. I should be Mrs. Cullen, not her."

"Is the champagne to your liking, Miss Denali? Mr. Cullen would be most disappointed if you don't finish it. It is his favorite." Michelle had returned. "Here, let me pour you some more."

She must have taken the opportunity to dump some on Tanya, because the screech that followed would have woken the dead.

"You incompetent little twit. You're Fired. Leave Now." We took this opportunity to make our presence known. I left the VIP lounge with the men. The ladies would follow momentarily.

"Is there a problem, Tanya? I don't appreciate the way you are speaking to my staff." I was just getting started with her.

"Eddie, this incompetent twit just ruined my designer outfit and shoes. She purposely dumped this, this piss water at me." She pouted at me.

"Did you not enjoy the champagne? It is my personal favorite." Michelle had subtly placed another glass of ginger ale on the table. "Delicious, as always. Sweetheart, what do you think?" I asked Bella, just as she arrived by my side.

"Oh, my God! Edward, I've never tasted anything this good, except maybe you," she added with a wink. Before anyone could stop her, Tanya reached over and slapped Bella right across the face.

My mother was in her face in the blink of an eye. "If you ever lay another hand on one of my children, I will kill you myself."

Tanya looked as though she was going to hit my mother also. "But she started it. She stole my Eddie."

Bella must have reached her limit, because the next moment there was nothing but a blur of chestnut hair as she let loose on Tanya. Not wanting Tanya to have Bella arrested, I pulled her back. My mother took it upon herself to take over. By the time she was done, Tanya was missing all her front teeth, a huge clump of her over-processed hair, and there was not an inch of her face that wasn't puffing and turning black and blue.

"Damn, remind me not to get on her bad side," Liam laughed. There was a chorus of 'no shits'.

My mother shrugged her shoulders, smirking.

"Ethy, wath you gonna do abouth her." Tanya could barely speak. She was pointing at Bella.

I leaned my head toward Bella, "This," and I proceeded to kiss her with all the passion I had.

Tanya was not the brightest crayon in the Crayola box. She tried to push Bella away from me.

"I've had enough. You have been nothing but a thorn in my family's side since the day you were born. I thank my lucky stars every day that Edward was NEVER with you. You are nothing but a gold digging whore and not good enough to even lick the dirt off of the bottom of Bella's shoe! You will leave now! If I ever see or hear from you again, I will lift the ban on killing women and personally see to it that you are permanently eliminated. You dared to raise your hand to a member of my family? Well, watch as your family is banished. By the time I'm done, there will not be an organization on this planet that will do business with anyone even vaguely associated to the Denali's." My father had truly reached his limit.

"You donth hafe thast tind of power." Tanya kept digging her own grave.

"Don't we? Obviously, you're out of the loop. Allow me to introduce you to my daughter-in-law, Isabella Marie Cullen, formerly Volturi-Swan and Aro's heir to his throne," My mother gloated. "Now, you will leave not only this club but the city also. Doesn't your father own a brothel near Las Vegas that you would feel at home at?"

It looks as though the situation has finally caught up to Tanya, as she looked scared, although she did seem to think she still had an ally present. She turned to Liam and Alistair, ignoring Siobhan completely.

"Shelths me."

"Now, why would we help you? These are our good friends and closest allies. I agree. You are a nuisance and need to be eliminated," Alistair informed her. Her eyes went wide as she finally realized she had been duped.

"If this is the entertainment you offer, we'll be traveling here more often," Liam exclaimed. Siobhan and Alistair nodded in agreement.