Flu Love's Kiss
Summary: Magic returns to Storybrooke bringing back magical illnesses as well. 'Love Flu' is going around and it's catching. Swan Queen.
A/N: Happy Valentine's Day! This story begins after the Season One finale.
Chapter 1 - Stuck on you
Emma sniffed and wiped her nose on her sleeve before knocking on the door to 108. She coughed and knocked again impatiently, ready to get the hell home and collapse in bed.
"Uh, Emma? You don't look so good," said Henry, at her side.
"It's just the flu, Henry," said Emma, her voice sounding nasal. She started to sway a bit waiting for Regina to hurry up and answer the door.
"Why do I have to go home?" Henry wrinkled his nose. He hadn't been home since before the curse had broken.
Emma sighed. "Kid, I don't want you to get sick. That's why you have to stay with your Mom this weekend ok?"
"But magic is back now and she's evil."
The door opened just in time for Regina to catch her son's words. Her schooled features and tight expression showed that she had heard however.
"Henry. Miss Swan. What can I do for you?"
"Hey uh," Emma stammered. "Regina, I'm not feeling so great, so I was wondering if you would take Henry... uh just for the weekend."
"Just for the weekend," echoed Henry.
Regina nodded. "Of course. Henry, why don't you go on upstairs. Your room's ready."
The boy scampered past his mother and ran upstairs with his backpack.
When he was gone Emma felt the weight of Regina staring hard at her. The last time she'd seen the brunette she'd been fleeing the hospital after tearily insisting to Henry that she did in fact love him. The former mayor had laid low ever since. The rest of Storybrooke had gone back to normal and everyday life had resumed... but nobody had entirely forgotten the Evil Queen.
"I know, this is awkward as hell. It's just, I don't want him to get sick," said Emma, trailing off.
"How responsible of you," sneered Regina.
Emma prickled at the slight against her parental experience or lack thereof.
"Look, I get it alright. But I'm uh, ...huh I'm too tired to fight wi' you," slurred Emma, starting feel faint again.
"You look like death, Miss Swan," said Regina, shocked by how hot against her hand the blonde's forehead was.
"Oh for god's sake come inside before you fall. You can't drive in that state."
Stepping into the foyer, Emma coughed again and managed to sneeze on Regina after the brunette closed the door behind them.
"Ugh, Miss Swan! Are you trying to share whatever disgusting illness you have contracted?"
"Sorry," Emma said weakly. She began to sway dangerously again and Regina caught her.
The brunette sighed in annoyance. "Guest rooms are upstairs. Just... stay away from me."
"Sure, but you gotta let go of my hand first."
"I'm not holding your hand. You're holding mine. Let go."
"What- I'm not-" said Emma, confused and weary. She tried to pull her palm away from Regina's but it seemed to be stuck.
"Miss Swan, what the hell is going on?"
That was the last Emma heard before she blacked out.
When Emma came to she was lying on the couch and something was patting at her face.
"Stoppit. Cut it out."
Emma tried to raise her right hand at the annoyance but someone else's hand came with hers. She opened her eyes blearily.
"You fainted, Miss Swan," said Regina, kneeling on the floor and leaning over her.
"What did you do to her," said Henry crossly. He'd heard the commotion and came running downstairs to see his mother magically transporting an unconscious Emma to the couch.
"Henry, enough. She'll be fine. Go and get a wet washcloth, please."
Emma tried to sit up, her head pounding. "Ugh. What's with our hands."
"I don't know. Something magical," said Regina, a little evasively. Her left hand was still joined to Emma's right.
Emma groaned and started coughing again into her free hand.
"Believe me," said Regina in disgust. "This is much worse for me than it is for you."
"Well, maybe I'll die of this flu and solve all your problems, Your Majesty."
"One can only wish," said Regina sarcastically.
"Yeah well, we better figure this out. But in the meantime, you're stuck with me," smirked Emma.
"What do you mean Love Flu?" said Emma raising a derisive eyebrow.
Mr Gold chuckled and rested his palms on the glass counter. "It's just like the regular flu only a lot more fun."
Regina had transported them both in a cloud of purple smoke and they'd appeared a second later outside the pawn shop. It was late and the shop was technically closed, but she insisted that there was only one person in town with magical knowledge who might know what they were dealing with.
"Look, I'm really not well enough for this crazy magic stuff right now. Can you just explain," said Emma tiredly.
"Love Flu," said Gold. "Also known as Honeymoon Hayfever, is a fairly common magical illness back in our land. Spreads like wildfire. It's very common among married couples and lovers."
"Miss Swan and I are nothing of the kind," snapped Regina. "How is this even possible?"
"I think you know, dearie," said Gold pointedly.
"Yeah but, how did I get it? And why am I stuck to Regina?" Emma was still hopelessly confused and all this was making her head spin.
"It's a contagion passed from one person to another usually via sexual contact or attraction."
Emma started a coughing fit again and turned red in the face.
"We're leaving," said Regina flatly. She turned on her heel to leave and was pulled back by the connection to Emma.
"Wait," Emma said, before switching back to Gold. She held up hers and Regina's joined hands. "How do we fix this?"
"There's no cure for Love, dearie. You just have to ride it out," Gold said, giving her a one-sided grin. "It will only last a few days. Probably."
"Gold," snarled Regina with gritted teeth.
"Oh and I would stay indoors until you recover. Wouldn't want to give anyone in town the wrong impression now would we?"
Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Who cares. It just looks like we're holding hands."
Regina's face darkened like a storm. Mr Gold caught her glares impassively and shrugged.
"You should count yourselves lucky that you're only attached by the hands. It is a lover's disease after all."
"Regina, would you slow down."
Emma coughed roughly, the furious march and chill of the night air was worsening her chest. She could see her breath clouding in front of her as they left Gold's shop.
Emma yanked on their hands and spun the brunette around to face her. If the indignant look Regina gave her was any indication, she was not amused by their diagnosis.
"You knew what this was didn't you?" said Emma hoarsely.
"I had my suspicions." Regina scanned the darkened street warily.
Emma narrowed her eyes at her shrewdly. "Wait, have you had this before?"
"No," snapped Regina.
"Hey. You're acting like I made you sick on purpose."
"Of course this is your fault. You think I want to be stuck with you? This is completely one-sided and it's all because of whatever puerile attraction you have to me."
Emma let out a laugh and raised her eyebrows. "What, you think I-"
"Everything ok here?" said Archie, appeared at their side with Pongo. He smiled genially at them. "Beautiful night for a stroll isn't it?"
"Hey, Archie," Emma put on a convincing smile and trying to act normal. It was a bit hard considering Regina was shiftily avoiding eye contact and her entire body language screamed 'go away'.
Archie give them a perceptive look. He didn't miss noticing their joined hands. "Oh!"
Emma cringed inwardly. "It's late, so we're just gonna uh..."
"Well, have a nice night, ladies. Let's go, Pongo!" Archie nodded at each of them and continued on his way.
"He knows," said Regina flatly. "It'll be all over the town by morning."
"Regina," groaned Emma. "Calm down. He's not going to tell anyone, he's a shrink."
"We have to stop him."
Emma's mouth dropped open in shock. "By doing what exactly? Geez, like anyone's going to believe it anyway."
Regina snapped a strained look at her and then sneezed. She stared at her free hand horrified by the confirmation that she was indeed sick too. Her eyes were starting to glaze over.
"You don't look so good. We'd better get you-" Emma started, but she was interrupted by the purple swirling mist around them.
A second later they appeared on the porch of the mansion.
That last bit of magic must've taken a lot out of Regina in her sick state and Emma only just caught her. She slumped against Emma's side in a dead faint.