Disclaimer: Sadly, all standard disclaimers apply here...

A/N: I'm baaaaaaaack! ^__^ A hojillion plus apologies for the late update, but then, what else did you expect from me? -_-' Never fear, you'll only have to put up with me for a bit longer. *sniff* I'll be sorry to be ending this story, actually, but...this time it's true. You have here the second to last chapter!!!! I'm surprised my story even made it this far. You reviewers rock my world! A few random things: yes, Glenn is human here, and Navi isn't out of Magus's spell just yet! (so no plot hole, but thanks for reminding me about it...^_^) In this chapter: I hope reviewers are happy with the outcome. I think you shall be pleased with Ozzie's fate. Anywho, thanks a billion for reading! Love ya guys!!! ~CronoCat =^_^=

Chapter Fourteen: In Which Peter Pan Thinks of the Happiest Thing

Or: The Really Outlandishly Impossible Battle Scene

"It's no use!" Crono panted, pausing beside Marle. He wiped sweat from his brow, eying his bloodied sword. "No matter what we do--we just can't kill Lavos!"

"But we can't stop now!" Marle exclaimed, letting loose another shaft from her crossbow. The great monster before them seemed not even to feel it. Marle sighed, aimed, and fired again. "I'll be out of ammo soon..."

Crono gave up trying to wipe his sword clean on the cement floor and nodded. "I'm exhausted. It's been nearly six hours now!"


Startled, the two looked up to see Magus yelling at the top of his lungs as he threw himself headlong at the giant beast, scythe flashing in front of him. Lavos flicked him away, almost effortlessly it seemed, with one tentacle and the Dark and Scary one flew across the room. Again. This made at least five times in the past hour. They watched wordlessly as Magus stood up, shook his head, dusted himself off, and charged again, hacking away at Lavos ruthlessly.

Glenn was fighting, too, but in a slightly more refined manner. The Masamune hummed viciously as it whirled through the air, striking Lavos's large bulk again and again.

"Hey--I know!" Crono said suddenly. He had to yell to be heard, and even then, Marle leaned in closer to catch the words. "What if we get Ozzie out of the corner, and use him to threaten Lavos! I mean, he's scary enough!"

"That means we have to touch him."

"Oh. Right....well. In that case, we could--" he trailed off sadly. "Ah, I got nothing."

"Well, we'll just have to make Ozzie come to us, then. Maybe--" Marle stopped and loosed a shot in the direction of Ozzie. There was a sudden piercing squeal, and then Ozzie reappeared from the pitch-black corner, an arrow stuck in his...bra strap.

He was almost to the center of the room, and out the far door before it happened. In the blink of an eye, one of Lavos's tentacles shot out and grabbed Ozzie. There was no time to call out, not that our heroes wanted to anyways. Ozzie gave a muffled scream, and then vanished. The room suddenly became completely silent.

"Oh, my God..." Marle breathed in disbelief.

Crono screamed like a little girl and promptly fainted.

Magus looked like he might be sick, and his pale skin became even paler.

"That...t'was the most vileact I hath ever seen committed," Glenn said, utter contempt all over his face.

"Did you...did he really just...eat Ozzie?!" Marle screamed.

"Mwhahaha! And she's next!" Lavos roared, grabbing Lucca. Her prone form dangled high in the air above them.

With a start, Crono revived and sprang up from the floor.


"Tick, tack, toe. I win. Again. How surprising..." Ganondorf's voice echoed drearily around the cells. He turned over the rock in his hands. It had been laying right beside him in the cell, and it was excellent for etching signs on the wall. Or stabbing guards. This explained how that last prisoner had escaped. Ganondorf sighed loudly and pushed the rock against the wall, drawing another small tick-tack-toe board.

"X," he announced over the high-pitched screeching noise the rock made. "Now your turn. Thank you. I'll put the O right here. Excellent choice, friend. Now I'll put my X here in the middle..."

A sudden shout from above caused Ganondorf to stop talking to himself and drop the rock in surprise. I've just GOT to get out of here! He thought and began pounding on the bars frantically. Nothing happened, just like nothing had happened for the past billion times he tried. But this time, he was not giving up. With a roar of determination, Ganondorf hurled himself bodily at the door.

"Come on, Link. Why are you still just standing there? Didn't I say ten minutes ago--"

Link held up a hand. "Zelda--tell me something."

"What is it now?" She asked impatiently.

Link scuffed his feet on the ground, as if nervous. "Could you, just off-hand, think of a really happy thought? I mean a really special, happy thought?"

The question caught Zelda by surprise. She frowned, thinking hard. "Why, Link, it's quite simple, really. I have lots of happy thoughts! Like, um...being a princess," she said slowly. She smiled, "going on adventures, having you rescue me, sewing--" she was practically shouting now, "--and green dresses with lots of lace!" At this last one, Zelda twirled in a little circle, grinning from ear to ear.

"Oh, Link, it's so easy! I'm sure you have one happy thought in there somewhere! C'mon, grumpy-face; think birthdays and presents and adventure and romance and holidays and...you must have a million happy thoughts!"

Link closed his eyes tightly.

"NOOOOOO!!" Crono cried again, spinning his sword so fast it was only a buzzing silver blur. "I won't let you! I won't!" he shouted, slicing at Lavos repeatedly and now executing a sort of jump. It was like a deadly kind of dance: he moved and twirled and jumped, the sword echoing his movements and keeping time.

"STOP!" Lavos cried, smacking at Crono, who neatly dodged the blows.

Our heroes and Magus watched, open-mouthed, as Crono leapt clear to the chandelier hanging from the ceiling. With a deafening yell, he jumped downwards, his sword a deadly glittering arc, and struck true. There was a blinding burst of white light, and a terrifically loud boom.

To Crono, everything seemed to be happening in slow motion, yet all at once. His sword sliced through easily, then he was falling, down, down, past Lavos, who seemed to be disintegrating. He saw Lucca slide from Lavos's grasp and shoot across the room, landing on top of Magus and knocking him over backwards. No one saw, but Navi (still under Magus's spell) got caught in the collision as well, and the three slid across the floor.

Suddenly, it seemed to be all over. Crono landed in a crouching position beside Marle and Glenn, who were still gaping at him. The room was destroyed, the wooden tables on fire, and a bright red color was spreading across the walls. In the relative silence, no one could mistake the ominous creaking noise as the castle began to collapse on itself.

Ganondorf hurled himself once more at the door, yelling the whole way. The world went black, but a few moments later, he found himself struggling to his feet, miraculously outside of the cell!

"I did it! I'm so strong!" He strode around, stretching his muscles and flexing proudly for a moment, before the realization struck him: the cell door had finally come open due to the pressure and weight of the whole place slowly collapsing. With a startled yell, he took off running up the stairs, and towards the safety of the outside world.

Lucca stood up, holding her head and groaning. "What happened?"

There was little time to be surprised. Glenn was the first to recover from the shock. He ran over and grabbed her arm. "Long story--we must leave now!" Then he picked her up and slung her over his back. "Hurry!" he called to the others.

Crono started to run, then paused, debating. "Damn it," he cried, giving in, and running back to Magus. "Get up, you big stupid mage! C'mon--please get up!" Crono kicked him a few times for good measure.

Just as Magus began to stir, Ganondorf burst out of the cells, yelling, "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, MAGUS!!" He charged him, and tackled Magus's prone form on the ground.

The far wall began to crumble, large rocks raining down from the ceiling. Crono managed to knock Ganondorf in the head with the butt of his sword, stunning him. Marle took matters into her own hands. She grabbed a tattered wall hanging and ran over. In no time at all she had Magus lashed to Ganondorf's back. Crono jabbed at the latter, bringing him painfully back to reality. In this way, Ganondorf was encouraged to make a run for it, and he did, with Crono fast at his heels.

As she turned around to head out too, Marle paused, noticing something small on the ground. "Navi!" she cried in horror. Forgetting all their previous fights, she scooped the small fairy up, and sprinted out of the castle.

Are you okay Link?" Zelda asked worriedly. "I'm sure it's no big deal if you can't think of anything happy..."

"No, no! I've got it! I've got my happy thought!" Link cried excited. "I'VE THOUGHT OF THE HAPPIEST THING!" Before he could get any farther, our heroes poured out of the castle, and the whole thing tumbled down, causing a minor earthquake. Link was shot, as if from a cannon, into the sky.

Despite all he had been through that day, Crono turned to his friends with a big smile on his face. "Guys, look--Peter Pan is flying!!"

A/N: Thanx again for reading! Don't forget to drop a review on your way out! Until next time, ~CronoCat =^_^=