Disclaimer: Farscape isn't mine, I just like living in denial.

Timing: This fic is the sequel to 'History' which takes place after ITLD:WISC.

Spoilers: Up to WISC, not beyond, AU for season 4

Feedback: Love it. Just to know that someone has actually read this other than people who know me and are trying to be nice (indeed, anyone at all) is a thrill. You can review, you can email, but please say something. Even if you want to point out a flaw. I don't have a regular beta-reader so help is always useful.

A/N: Although I'm only just posting this, this series has gone beyond where this story leaves off. Part three 'The Quick Fix' is already complete and part four 'Waiting For A Star To Fall' is slowly progressing. I'll post them here too, I'm just a bit behind.

And, oh yes:

CRAIS IS ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Just in case you didn't know :-) )

Chapter 1:

Crais sat up and threw the covers off the bed, then lay back down on his other side in yet another futile attempt to get comfortable. His quarters were once again several points above optimum temperature. Not far enough to be dangerous, merely enough to be irritating. Not for the first time he was sorely tempted to have Talyn give him the hand of friendship a second time so that he could once again have control. Talyn was still weak from their adventure on board the command carrier and was having trouble controlling all his systems on his own. Nevertheless Crais knew that a new transponder was not a viable option. Talyn's instability was at least in part his fault, although his hybrid roots had doubtless contributed to it, and Crais could not risk doing further damage. Talyn should have another Captain, at least until he had time to mature. But there was no-one suitable, and so he had to manage alone.

As always now, when he couldn't sleep, the familiar images came back to him. Carma ill and weak, her breathing slowly growing more laboured. Him at her bedside through the night. Jool and Crichton somewhere in the background, just touching the corners of his field of vision from time to time. All of them waiting. Her eventual heart failure, the funeral they had held, his return to Talyn...with nothing except a dull ache deep inside that wouldn't go away.

He could see it as clearly as if it were happening now.

He sighed, got up and pulled on his uniform. It was no use trying to sleep, not once he started thinking like that. He left his quarters, pulling on his jacket as he left, and headed back to Moya.

Pilot expressed no surprise at his arrival, merely allowed him to dock without asking why he was there. Crais trod the now familiar path to the medilab. Naturally for the middle of the sleep cycle, the ship was deserted.

Jool looked up in surprise when he entered the lab.

"What are you doing here at this hour?" she asked.

"I will take over," he replied. "I advise you to get some sleep."

"I sent you back to Talyn five arns ago to do the same," Jool replied.

"I have had sufficient rest," Crais said firmly.

"I'll wager you haven't slept a microt."

He was definitely spending too much time with her.

"I prefer to be here," he said.

"If you keep doing this you will cause yourself damage," Jool commented.

"I will take the risk," Crais replied.

Jool gave up. "I'll be back when the sleep cycle is over and then I will take over and you will go back to Talyn and go to bed even if I have to chain you to it."

Crais nodded briefly. Jool got up and headed back to her own quarters, leaving him to his thoughts.

Crais sat down by Carma's bedside and looked down at her. She was sleeping peacefully tonight. He knew that she was out of danger, Jool had told him so a thousand times and he had finally begun to believe her, but the nightmares images persisted. The first time they had felt so real that he had really believed that she was dead. He had barely slept since the time he had found her in pain. It had been several solar days now and she was doing better and better, but his mind still wouldn't let his body rest.

He sat and watched her until the sleep cycle was over.


"Bed. Now. No arguments."

Crais blinked at the suddenly bright lights and turned to face the determined Jool, briefly thinking how much more appealing that order would be coming from Carma. But he knew as well as she did that he needed to rest.

"I promise that I will comm you if anything changes, but she'll be fine," Jool added.

"Of course," Crais said, his tone betraying no worry. "Sebaceans are a resilient species."

Jool's brow furrowed. "She's not Sebacean," she said.

Crais, who had turned to leave, stopped. "What?" he asked, turning back.

Jool indicated the sleeping figure on the medibed. "Carma, she's not Sebacean."

"She obviously is," Crais replied.

"She may look Sebacean, but so does Crichton," Jool pointed out. "And she's definitely not. Her physiology is quite similar to yours, but she has a heat gland for one thing, she can regulate body temperature. It's just as well. If she didn't have it the hot flushes caused by the withdrawal would have sent her into the living death before we could have done anything to help her. It's really incredible how similar she looks to Sebaceans though, I wonder how many species there are that look like yours?"

"I must remain here," Crais said, moving back to the bed. "I must speak with Carma when she wakes up."

"Whatever it is, it can wait," Jool said firmly. "I meant what I said about chaining you to your bed. I may not be able to overpower you, but I spoke to Crichton and D'Argo and they're more than willing to help me out. And unless you find the idea of being chained naked to a console in command appealing I suggest you co-operate, because that's what they threatened to do."

A look of irritation flashed across Crais' face at Crichton's latest unfathomable behaviour, but he decided not to take the risk. Sometimes you just didn't know if the human was serious or not.


He returned just over eight arns later. He might have slept for less than half an arn of that, but hopefully it would be enough to convince Jool that he had indeed rested. Besides, he was determined to speak with Carma. Jool's revelation had been churning round his mind, one reason why he had barely slept, and he needed to hear what Carma would have to say.

When he came in, Jool took one look at the dark circles underneath his eyes, sighed and began muttering something about sleeping pills. Fortunately she decided that she was fighting a losing battle and decided to leave. Crais might want to spend his every waking arn in the medilab, but she did not.

"Hi," Carma said from her bed.

"How are you feeling?" Crais asked, coming to stand beside her.

"Bored," Carma said bluntly. "I want to get up."

"I take it that Jool is against this?"

"She says that I need more rest," Carma said impatiently. "I've been lying on my back for five straight solar days. There is only one circumstance where that would be a good thing and this is not it."

Crais couldn't help smiling at that. She was definitely getting better. "I am certain that this is in your best interests," he said.

"You're just getting revenge for all the times I made you rest, aren't you?"


"At least say that you've got something interesting to tell me? I'm going to go crazy if I do nothing for much longer. How is your memory recovery going?"

Crais pulled Jool's work stool closer to the bed and sat stiffly down on it. "There are still gaps, but I believe that I have recovered the majority of my memories."

"How are you adjusting?"

"It is...disorientating," Crais replied, considering. "New memories are constantly being awakened by the most unusual things. And my mind is constantly being bombarded with concerns that I had forgotten about."

"Like what?" Carma asked curiously.

"The majority concern Talyn," Crais replied. "It seems that, before the episode on the command carrier, he was having some...problems."

"What kind of problems?"

"Behavioural problems," Crais answered, quickly filling her in on all he could remember. "Talyn requires a new captain and perhaps even more extensive help. With the Peacekeepers no longer an option, I must find another solution."

Carma looked thoughtful. "Let me see if I've got this right. You and Talyn were joined by the transponder almost since he was born, right? And then you had to splice your neural engrams with his after the retrieval squad tried to shut down his higher functions?"

"That is correct."

"And Talyn's an adolescent now?"


Carma shifted herself on to her elbows and raised her head. "Then I don't think that Talyn needs another captain."

"What do you suggest?" Crais asked, curiously.

"Bialar you like to be in complete control, don't you?"

Crais shifted. "I am...accustomed to it."

"Understatement of the decade," Carma said. "That's the problem. Talyn's been commanded all his life, and when he was small that was necessary, but, while I hate to be the one to break it to you, he's growing up now. He needs something different. He still needs you, you're practically his father, but only when he asks for help. What he needs could be something more like...a mentor."

"But Talyn is having difficulty coping alone."

"True, he still needs someone to help him control his systems, to guide him and offer him support - but more as a partner than a commander."

"So what you mean..." Crais began.

"...is that Talyn should have a pilot," Carma finished.

"The pilots' home world is a great distance from here and Talyn cannot starburst."

"Obviously our first priority is to have Talyn repaired, then we can consider finding Talyn a pilot. A pilot who has already fully matured could help Talyn to grow more stable."

Crais looked down at her, amused. "It sounds as if you have appointed yourself Talyn's surrogate mother."

"Yes well," Carma said, lying back down. "I don't have anything else, do I? Everything I ever cared about has gone. My family is dead, my career is over, I've left the planet I lived my entire life on. Not that I was sad to leave, I was abused and damaged by practically everyone I knew there, but it's gone none the less. That really leaves me only myself to care about. But I'm a carer, I've lived my life serving others and that's a hard habit to break. Since I'm here, and you could obviously use my help, I think I'll look after you and Talyn."

"What help do you believe that I need?"

"You need someone in your daily life besides Talyn. It will be good for both of you to have someone else to think about. You've spent far too much time alone."

"So you intend to come with us?" Crais asked.

"With all due respect, where else did you think I was going to go?" Carma asked. "I've no ship, no provisions, virtually no technical skills and I've never left the planet I was born on. You on the other hand have everything that I need and more. Really this could work out pretty good for the both of us. You get a companion, personal medic and a break from Talyn's company, I get someone to teach me how to survive in the big bad world."

"From what I have seen," Crais replied, "I think you would manage that admirably even without my help."

"Well maybe I would," Carma said, "but it's nice to have a little backup to count on. I think you need someone to remind you of that."

"So you wish us to have a business relationship. Is that all?"

For a brief second he imagined he saw a look of fear in her eyes.

"I think that's probably best," she said. "If we're serving on the same ship together it could really complicate things and we both have a lot of things to deal with anyway. I really think it's best that we just keep things platonic."

Crais nodded. "I agree."

Carma looked surprised. "You do? I thought...."

"Carma why did you not tell me that you are not Sebacean?" Crais asked abruptly.

Carma looked surprised. "You didn't ask."

"I did not know that I needed to ask. I had no idea that there were other species who looked like Sebaceans except for Crichton's."

"Crichton's not Sebacean?" Carma asked in surprise.

"No. He is human. What are you?"

"Teraxian," Carma replied. "It never occurred to me to tell you, I suppose I just assumed that you were aware of our existence."

"I wish you had told me earlier."


"Carma what do you know about Peacekeepers?" Crais asked.

"They're bad news, stay away from them," Carma said with a small smile. "That was apparently all I ever needed to know."

"It was good advice," Crais said, then grew serious. "Carma, part of what Peacekeepers are taught is the concept of irreversible contamination. I was indoctrinated to believe that other races are inferior, but particularly that inter-species relationships are wrong, even...repellent and that half breeds are to be despised."

"So what you're saying to me is that you find the idea of having sex with me...repellent?" Carma asked, pulling a face. "How flattering."

"No, I do not mean that," Crais replied. "But it is difficult to reconcile my feelings with what I was taught." He paused. "I thought that I had at least begun to overcome those prejudices, but now...I find that I have not."

"Well..." Carma said slowly, "at least that makes it easier. You don't want us to get involved because I'm not Sebacean and I...well, anyhow, we each have our own reasons. We can work together without that getting in the way."

Somehow Crais didn't think that it would be so easy.