I'll follow you down to where forever lies
Without a doubt I'm on your side
There's nowhere else that I would rather be
I'm not about to compromise
Give you up to say goodbye
I'll guide you through the deep
I'll keep you close to me
Sam stumbles into the clearing, the crude cross marking Dean's grave is visible in the pale moonlight, mocking his failure, his desperate attempts to save his brother. Sam is bone weary and not nearly as drunk as he'd like to be. He reaches for the flask he has taken to carrying and realizes it is empty, was empty before he summoned the crossroad demon. The empty flask was the reason for the bottle he'd been drinking from at the crossroads, which he'd stupidly tossed away in a fit of rage.
He's lost count of the times he's been to this place, doesn't remember the last time he's slept. All he can think of is the last time he saw his brother alive, being ripped to shreds by hellhounds while he was unable to lift a hand to save him. He had to save him now, had to find a way to bust him out of hell, had to get him back, had to…..
"Dean, I tried…..I've done everything I know to do…nobody wants to deal…..nobody will….."
Something stirs behind him and Sam peers into the trees.
"Just come and get me, why don't you?" Sam yells into the night.
Put me out of this misery.
A possum scurries through the edge of the clearing and Sam gives a bitter laugh. "Never a good monster when you need one."
His eyes are once again drawn to the cross, hastily made and not nearly good enough for the grave of his brother, a hero, a man who sacrificed his entire life for a world who would never appreciate it and a brother who didn't deserve it.
As long as I'm around, nothing bad is gonna happen to you.
Dean's words echo in his head. His brother had always been the better half of their dynamic duo, always pushing aside any wants or needs of his own for the greater good: the greater good that had done nothing but send him to hell.
A sob escapes Sam's throat and once again he reaches for the empty flask, the flask that belonged to his dead brother. Screaming his frustration to the sky, he falls to his knees on the grave, doubles over in agonizing grief, his forehead pressed to the dirt, fingers digging into the soil, realizing this is as close to his brother as he will ever be again.
"Noooooo..." Sam's moans are choked with tears that he fears will never end. He cries his brother's name over and over into the darkness, stopping only when he finally realizes what he must do.
"Maybe I can't save you, Dean, but I can't leave you either."
Sam pushes himself up from the ground just as his phone begins to ring. Pulling it from his pocket he sees Bobby's name on the caller ID. He tosses the phone to the ground, stomping it until it shatters in pieces.
Bobby can never know what he's planning because he'll try to talk him out of it. Dean had been there for him his whole life. He wasn't going to leave his brother alone in Hell.
"I'm coming, Dean. I swear, if it's the last thing I do, I'll find a way."
Sam strides from the clearing, still swaying but with a purpose.
If I could find assurance to leave you behind
I know my better half would fade
I'll follow you down
In the shadows, Ruby watches and waits, a smile on her face. It's time to make her move.
A/N: Well, it's been awhile. This fic came to mind because of the song I'll Follow You by Shinedown (yes, I love them) and by a piece of fan art that I have no idea who to credit for. It's a simple black and white piece that shows Sam kneeling on Dean's grave. I love it and ever since I saw it I wanted to write a fic to go with it. If you know the art I'm talking about and who created it, I'd love to know their name.
Even though we all know Ruby turned out to be someone Sam should never have trusted, I do feel that in some weird way she saved him. I think Sam was on a suicide mission and that if he couldn't save Dean, he just wanted to join him, which is what I tried to show with this little fic.
It's been almost four years since I wrote my first fic. For those of you who have stuck with me and faithfully reviewed even when the fics are few and far between, thank you so much! And new peeps, comments are always welcome. :)