Ok, this popped into my head after watching the kiss scene between Italy and Holy rome a few times. I mean, come on! i'm a firm beiever that Germany is Holy Rome, that's that. I mean, it would make sense to me...
So, read. enjoy, I tried really hard.
It was a chore he had been pushing back for a while now, and today was better than any day to do it now. Gilbert, his obnoxious brother, was out for the day. That was good; the Prussian really was a pain in the neck, if Ludwig were to be perfectly honest with himself. Heaving a sigh, Ludwig set his pen down and stood from his work desk. Outside, the sun was high in the sky; noon already, he noticed.
It was one of those rare days, the ones where Gilbert was gone and Italy and Japan had found something else other than their German friend to occupy their time with. His home was quiet, aside from the occasional barking from the dogs out in the yard. Yes, today was better than any day to clean up the attic. It wasn't a very tedious task, yes he would admit that, but his and his brother's attic was filled with stuff; Gilbert's diaries, both of their Nazi uniforms from that time, and photo albums, weapons, and of course the normal things, such as old christmas decorations and such. There was so much shit in there, Ludwig had been staying away from it for decades now, only going in there if it was really needed.
But no, today it had to be done. He made his way up the stairs that led to his attic. Truthfully, he probably should had waited until Gilbert was home so that lazy moocher could help too, his things were also in there, but he decided against it. Gilbert would have only complained the whole time, or made a mess of things. He opened the attic door and sighed, met with the sight of boxes piled high. He sighed, shaking his head, "It must be done..."
He walked over and pulled a box over, opening it and looking at what was inside. He rolled his eyes. "Gilbert's diaries..."
Honestly, the other male had hundreds of those things! Though Ludwig really couldn't blame his brother. Gilbert was self absorbed, of course he'd want to remember each and every day of his long...very long...life. Ludwig pushed aside the box and went for another. He opened the box and peered inside. This time, it was his stuff. His erotic...ahem, things, if you may.
Blushing, Ludwig closed the box again and cleared his throat. He cleaned for about an hour, managing to throw out a few boxes full of useless junk he didnt need, and Gilbert hopefully wouldn't miss. By now his hands were lightly coated in dust and his hair wasn't slicked back anymore. Now, it was hanging in front of his blue eyes, making him have to stop and move it aside every so often. He would fix it later.
Sighing, Ludwig sat back against the wall and heaved a small yawn. If he had known cleaning out only boxes would be this tiring he would have just not started this damn chore at all! But he was never one to leave things left undone, so after a few minutes of rest, he stood and walked to another box, knealing and opening it. He blinked a bit and frowned, closing it again quickly.
Nazi stuff. Why they kept that stuff, even he wasn't sure. Gilbert had once tried to throw it all out after the second world war had ended and Ludwig had been carted away by those allies to serve his time as his punishment, but he never did. Ludwig had sworn up and down that he'd get rid of it, he'd get rid of every single damn peice of it. The clothes, the news article, the weapons and hats and journals...even Gilbert's journals from that time were kept in this box, seperate from the others. He sighed and lifted the box, walking over and setting it down on top of another. He turned on his heel and went for another box, faced with a towering stack of them.
He reached for the top box, sliding it off of the top slowly. There was a clattering soud from behind the box and then a small thud and he blinked. Zhe hell was that...?
He moved aside the boxes and tilted his head. There, lying on the floor, was an old, almost ancient, looking pushbroom. It was old, the bristles frayed and the handle rotting away. He knealed down, frowning. Was this here zhe whole time...? It's ancient...
He stared at it and reached out, running his finger tips over it. A pounding began at the back of his head as soon as his skin touched the broom and he winced slightly, drawing his hand back to touch his head. "Zhe hell...?"
"Take this! Maybe...it will help you think of me...then you won't forget about me...!"
Wide eyed, Ludwig stummbled back, his hands gripping his head as he let out a small, strangled yell. He shook his head once, twice, three times, before slowly sliding his shaking hands off of his head. "W-was...what...? Zhat...zhat voice...I know it...don't...i? No..."
Flashes of scattered memories passed through his mind.
A big house, and a little italian girl... a big house, and a little blonde boy... a love... there was a cat festival, the girl clung to the blonde boy the whole time...
Ludwig shook his head again. "I'm must be crazy..."
He took a deep breath and went back over tot he pushbroom. He stared at it, slowly, and carefully, picking it up. Again, his head began to pound.
"Oh Italy...I would be honored to have your pushbroom!"
Ludwig's hands shook as his eyes widened as scattered flashes of something flashed through his mind.
A war, maybe...? The blonde boy...was he leaving? No, why did all of this feel as if it were de ja vu? He didn't know the blonde or the italian girl...but wait...
Ludwig gripped the broom tighter, sinking to the floor and gripping his head with one of his shaking hands. "Ah...zhis...what is zhis...?!"
The italian child stared at Holy Rome, sniffling slightly. "Take this!" The little italian held out the pushbroom, sniffling again. "Maybe...i twill help you think of me...then you won't forget about me...!"
Holy Rome stared. "A pushbroom? But why would it make me think of you...?"
Then, it hit him. Italy used the pushbroom all the time, everyday even. Yes, that would surely remind him of Italy...!
"Oh, Italy," Holy Rome smiled, stepping closer. "I would be honored to have your pushbroom!"
He took the broom, wrapping his hands around it with a wide smile.
Ludwig grit his teeth, the pounding in his head growing. He fell on his side, the pushbroom clattering to the floor beside him. He held his head, panting as pain racked through his body. "N-Nein...!"
It hurt, gott, it hurt. He couldn't feel anything aside from the pain that wouldn't go away! Those things going through his mind, those voices...it hurt!
"West!" The door was kicked open, a grinning, silver haired and crimson eyed prussian strolling in. "It's about time you cleaned out this-...West!"
Gilbert rushed over, dropping to his knees beside his trembling brother who's hands were covering his face. He gulped, reaching out to help his brother sit up. "West...west? ...Ludwig, damn it!"
Gilbert grabbed Ludwig's hands, trying to pry them away from his face. "Ludwig, look at me! Now!"
Ludwig shook harder, his hands fallinf away from his face as tears welled in his wide, terified eyes. "B-Broder..."
Gilbert gulped, pulling his brother closer and ran a soothing hand through his brother's hair. "Gott, what happened...?"
"B-broom," Ludwig gasped out, suddenly looking around quickly.
"Broom," Gilbert murmured before his eyes fell on the decaying pushbroom. His eyes widened before he grit his teeth. "Fuck...! West, did you touch that?"
"Give it...to me..." Ludwig panted, sitting up and reching for the broom.
Gilbert growled and shook his head, snatching the broom and holding it away. "No, West you-"
"It's mine!" Ludwig yelled, gripping his head with one hand. "He gave it to me! Give it back, now! It's mine!"
"It isn't yours!" Gilbert yelled back, stepping back a little.
His brother growled, eyes narrowed. "I...Italy...gave it to me before...I went away..."
"You're talking nonsense," Gilbert snapped, shaking his head. "You don't know what-"
"I'm Holy Rome, damn it!" Ludwig yelled, making Gilbert freeze. He panted, stepping closer as tears welled up in his eyes. "Aren't...I? I'm...Holy Rome...right...?"
"West," Gilbert began, slowly stepping to his brother. He set the pushbroom down, taking a deep breath. "You need to relax."
"I will not!" Ludwig yelled, stepping back. "G-give me the pushbroom, please! He gave it to me!"
Gilbert sighed, walking over and setting his hands on his brother's face, making his little brother look at him. "West...you're Germany."
"Not then," Ludwig whispered, his hands gripping the front of his brother's shirt for dear life. "I...I was...I was him...wasn't I? Holy...Roman Empire...zhat was me...! I know it was! I...I left...I left him! Italy...I never...came back, Gilbert! I never...that promise...!"
Gilbert grew pale. "West, relax...you're going to give yourself a panic attack if you-"
"I hurt him, " Ludwig whispered. "I...I made him...cry...Gilbert, I made Italy cry...!"
Ludwig fell against his brother, sobbing into the Prussian's chest. He slid to the floor, bringing his brother closer to him as he tried his best to soothe him. "...You're not supposed to remember that stuff..."
Ludwig shook harder, his sobs comming out louder. "What...Gilbert, who...am I...?"
Gilbert hesitated. "...I need you to relax before I explain anything."
Relax. Yes, he needed to relax. Taking a deep breath, Ludwig leaned away and wiped at his eyes. Gilbert waited, trying to form things together in his mind. When Ludwig was calm enough, Gilbert began. "...A long time ago, I had a little brother. He...was very small...and I wasn't around very much for him. His name...was Holy Roman Empire. Now listen to me Ludwig, please don't freak out."
Ludwig held up a hand to silence him. He frowned a bit, taking a deep breath. "...I...was him...ja?"
Gilbert nodded slowly. "Yes...Holy Rome, he...died. He died a long time ago...but you were him. I don't exactly know how to explain it, broder, but you used to be Holy Rome. You were my brother then, and you're my brother now. His memories...they're yours, but they've stayed locked away up till now...it's that damn broom, I've tried to keep it away from you. I...was afraid it would dop this to you..."
"Hide it..." Ludwig's shoulders began to shake again. "But...but he gave it to me...why...? You can't hide it, broder! I promised him I'd keep it...!"
Gilbert nodded and gently brought his shaking brother into a hug. "Nein, I won't hide it now. I can't...but West, your mind can't handle all of this right-"
"I need to see him," Ludwig pushed away, standing on shaking legs. "I..I need to find Italy!"
Gilbert shoot up. "West, you-"
"Now!" Ludwig gasped out, a hand flying up to grab his head. He fell against the wall, shaking. "It...it's been so long...l-let me see him, broder..."
Gilbert didn't have to answer, because at that moment Ludwig fell to the floor with a thud. Gilbert gasped before sighing. He managed to get Ludwig onto the downstairs couch, sitting in a chair and simply staring at his little brother. The silence they wer ein was short lived, the door flying open to reveal a grinning Italian.
"Germany!" Italy sang as he strolled in.
Gilbert shot up, slapping a hand over the italian's mouth to silence him. "Hush, you!"
Italian blinked before his brown eyes fell to the sleeping German on the couch. "Oh, he's taking a siesta? I had no idea!"
"Yes," Gilbert nodded, tugging the smaller male towards the door. "You need to leave. Now."
Italy pouted. "But I just got here and fratello has Spain over and they said I had to leave so they could so adult things! I have nowhere to go!"
"Go see Japan." Gilbert tried, pausing and looking at him.
"Japan is at Mr. England's," Italy pouted.
Gilbert groaned. "Look, I don't care where you go, just-"
"G-Gilbert...?" Ludwig's voice made them both look over.
Ludwig was sitting up, a hand gripping his head once more. He looked up to see his brother, but when his eyes fell on Italy they grew wide. "I...Italy..."
"Germany!" Italy exclaimed happily, rushing over to crush the german in a hug. "Ve, I came to see you!"
"I...Ita...Italy..." Ludwig's body went rigid, eyes welling with tears again.
Gilbert grit his teeth. "Italy, move!"
Italy blinked in confusion. "But why...?"
Gilbert began to panic. "Now really isn't-"
"Italy..." Ludwig's arms wrapped around the surprised Italian, the german shaking.
Italy blinked in surprise. "Germany...? You're shaking...are you ok...?"
"I'm so sorry..." Ludwig whispered, hiding his face in the Italian's chest. "I...s-so...so sorry...!"
Italy frowned in confusion, tugging free and pushing the german back a little. "Germany...look at me..."
Ludwig looked up, his blue eyes teary and Italy froze. Germany didn't cry, never. He was strong and brave; crying was Italy's thing, not Germany's...
Italy frowned and tilted his head in confusion. "Germany...why are crying...? What hppened?...Do I need to beat somebody up?!"
It was a weak attempt at making the German smile, and it failed. Italy frowned, looking over his shoulder at Gilbert. "What's happening...?"
Gilbert paused before throwing a serious look atthe italian. "...Holy Rome."
Italy's eyes widened before he glanced away. "What about him...?"
Gilbert looked away, arms crossed. Ludwig took a shaky breath, wiping his eyes. "Italy...i..I am...I'm..."
Italy tilted his head in confusion. "You're what...?"
Ludwig tensed up before looking at him sadly. "I...am Holy Rome..."
Italy's eyes widened and then he backed up a bit. "...What?"
"It's true," Gilbert murmured, walking closer and sitting on the edge of the couch. "...My brother is Holy Rome. He...was unaware until now."
"I already knew that," Italy muttered. "I was just surprised he knew..."
At that, Gilbert grew furious and snatched the italian up by the shirt. "You knew too?!"
Italy flinched. "S-Si..."
Gilbert's eyes narrowed. "Why didn't you try to tell him earlier?! You must have know he couldn't handle finding out on his own! Look at him, Feliciano!"
At the use of his human name, Italy grew serious. He shoved the prussian away, taking a deep breath. "Germany didn't remember...and I thought it was better if he didn't. Holy Rome's life...was different from Germany's...and Germany seemed happy the way he was. I...didn't want to ruin that."
Gilbert looked away and stepped back. Slowly, Italy walked back over and sat beside Ludwig. He took a deep breath before smiling. "Go ahead Ludwig...tell me whatever you want to."
For a moment Ludwig was silent until he latched onto the Italian again, crying into his chest. "I...I left you...I promised I'd come back...I tried, I did! I wanted to...I wanted to come back to you, Italy...! So many nights...I was alone...you were alone...because of me!"
Italy's smile fell as he slowly ran a comforting hand through the german's hair. "I was ok..."
"Nien," Ludwig whispered, shaking his head as he looked up with tears rolling down his cheeks. "I..left you, Italy...I never kept my promise...! I'm terrible...I left you to grow up all by yourself! I never protected you...or stayed beside you...I missed you so much and I...never...returned to you..."
The italian frowned and made Ludwig look at him. He took a deep breath, speaking slowly. "...But you did come back to me. Not as Holy Rome, but as Germany. I knew you were him...your eyes, they're the same...always watching me, making sure I'm alright because even back then, I needed your help. You may not be Holy Rome anymore...but inside you are. I was happy when I found the you that was Germany, because I knew you were him. I never got angry when you left, only sad...because I knew that that would be the last time I'd see Holy Rome. But, I found Germany, and he's the same strong, kind, caring person I fell in love with so many centuries ago."
Ludwig shook his head slowly. "I...I never kept zhe promise..."
"Silly," Italy laughed softly, tilting his head. "You came back to me, I told you that. Not as Holy Rome...but as Germany. And I love him as much as I loved Holy Rome."
Ludwig wiped his eyes and Italy smiled, leaning in and pressing their lips together. Ludwig's entire body went rigid before he began to relax. His lips...are as soft as they were so long ago...
He pressed back, centuries of longing and desire bulding up until it was unbearable. He was crying again, but these tears were happy. Italy pulled away with a smile and Ludwig couldn't help but let out a weak chuckle. "...You...probably should have told me back then zhat...you were a boy."
Italy blinked. "...You thought I was a girl?!"
At that, Gilbert laughed. "You wore dresses!"
Italy huffed but smiled again, looking at Ludwig. "...How did you remember all of that, huh?"
Ludwig wiped at his eyes and smiled."Zhe pushbroom...i found it."
Italy blinked before smiling. "I told you it would help you remember me."
Ludwig smiled, leaning closer and bringing Italy into a hug. "I won't leave again...I promise."
Italy smiled, nodding to himself, mostly. "I know...Ti amo, Ludwig."
Ludwig smiled against the italian's shoulder. "Ich liebe dich...Feliciano."
Gilbert took that time to excuse himself, going back up the stairs to the attic. He picked up the pushbroom that was left on the floor, smiling a little as he leaned it against the wall. "I knew I kept this for a reason."
awwwww T_T like? Dislike? review please, i'd appreciate it.