Shinobi of the Old Republic

Prologue: First Meditation

Disclaimer: Do not own Naruto, Star Wars, or any of the other things i Reference. I make no money off of this. Also, the speech below is shamelessly stolen and butchered from Gihren's Funeral Speech from Gundam.


Peace is a lie. At one point I would have disagreed, back when I was a genin and I did not truly understand what the word meant. I know now that it means 'lack of conflict'. What I strive for is lack of war, but those are two different things. War is violence and hatred. Conflict is either two entities wanting two different things, or one wanting two different things. For example, foxes eat rabbits, yet rabbits want to live. There is conflict there. Yet foxes do not hate rabbits, nor seek their annihilation, so there is no war. There is a conflict when two people debate, yet there is no violence. Through that conflict, either the truth wins out, or both sides are strengthened. Conflict is like the hammer and anvil of a forge. beating out impurities and giving strength to the steel. This is what the Echani believe, as do I. There is no peace, for to be in conflict is to be alive. To have passion, which leads to conflicts, is to be alive. Peace is a lie.


There is only passion. Without passion, we have no future, no life. As Master Kae is fond of saying, Apathy is death. Sai, Danzo, and the rest of ROOT showed me this. Without hunger, we would not eat. Without lust, we would not breed. Without love, compassion, sympathy, or empathy, we would not work together. Without anger or fear, we will not protect. Hatred, something which I admittedly believe to be a hinderance, is merely anger sustained over a long period. Without any one of these passions, we would be mere automatons waiting for death. Life is too precious to squander in that way. Apathy is death. In life, there is only Passion.


Through Passion I gain strength. Whenever I was injured, sometimes with injuries that would be considered fatal on anyone else, it was my passion, my need to protect, that made me pick myself up, dust myself off, and give it another go. Hell, I even invented a jutsu that allowed me to channel my infamous stubbornness into keeping me alive. I would have never have had the resolve necessary if not for my passion. Through Passion I gain strength.


Through strength I gain victory. Power, however, is not an end in and of itself. If you think that, you have lost sight of your objective. If you want power in order to, for instance, protect your lover, if you have to sacrifice them to gain said power, then what's the point? I will never understand how most 'geniuses' never figure this out. Maybe it's because the feel like their minds are used for things 'better' than introspection. I would have loved to thank Fukasaku for getting me into the practice, but unfortunately the old toad died years ago, before I realized it's importance. The importance of introspection and meditation is one of the few things I agree with the Masters on. After all, if you do not know yourself, how do you know that anything you do is what you truly want? Through strength I gain victory.


Through Victory, my chains are broken. When it is all said and done, and you have accomplished your goal, then all your hard work has paid off. Your burden is released, and a reprieve is earned. Of course, to live is to be in conflict, and peace is a lie. You may then take up a new goal, and be bound to it once more, or choose to sit it out, if it is not important to you. That is your freedom.


This is my new ninja way, the way of the Sith. My nindo has changed much over the years, conflict honing it, refining it, In ways I never expected. When I began, it was the need to be wanted, to be respected. I wished to be Hokage, because the Hokage was respected and needed. I was a mere child, and thought that the Hokage was respected and needed because he was Hokage. The reality was, the Hokage was the Hokage because he was respected and needed beforehand. When the need for acknowledgement was my nindo, i was unworthy of the title, as I wanted it for my own selfish reasons.


Then it became about protecting my loved ones. I had received the rude awakening that I was, from my birth, a human sacrifice. All my suffering was worth something, every minute i suffered, someone else's life was made better. Why not make it my ninja way? Of course, I had help. The help came from a friend, who never had the opportunity to cease being my enemy. His name was Haku. He was a boy, who looked like a girl who i had met the February of last year. I remember it like it was yesterday, despite being over a decade ago...

I was wearing that eyesore of a jumpsuit that i had decided was oh so fashionable all those years ago. Not the color, Orange is awesome, but the design was awful. Ugh. Wait, why am i focusing on that? Maybe I hung out with Ino just a little too much in the past. Anyways...Haku was wearing a bright pink kimono, with a black choker to conceal the Adam's Apple. He probably got his jollies by trolling people with his androgyny. Well, i suppose taking humor from it is better than developing insecurities about it. I was helping him gather medicinal herbs, which i later found out was for his master, Zabuza Momochi.

"This guy must be pretty important to you for you to be out here alone, gathering plants for him." I said.

"Yes. He is mine. My own. My prrrreeeecioussssssss..." Haku then coughed twice, making a sound like "Ollum! Ollum!"

Wait, I don't think it went like that. Maybe I need the ship's doctor to adjust my prescription again. That or someone tried to poison me again. When are they going to learn that only makes me loopy for a couple of hours, due to my freakish immune system? Then again, maybe that was the point. In that case, it was most likely Malak, seeking revenge. Long story short, I spiked his Juma on Nar Shadda and left him there, as a joke, and, well...let's just say he came out of it with his jaw needing to be amputated and a strange phobia of Gizka. I'm not sure I want to know.


But I'm digressing. When I was apprenticed to Ero-Sennin, that desire to protect expanded to include all of the Elemental Nations. An impossible task. But I thrived on impossible tasks. Once completed, I once again looked for something to do, as the world was not enough. Then, an admittedly arrogant thought struck, but it was the only one that gave me purpose. Why settle for taking away the pain of those in the Elemental Nations? Why not try to take away the pain of everyone, everywhere, forever? What was the point in being a human sacrifice if it meant someone other than me was going to suffer anyway? Needless to say, I failed. For years, i felt I had no purpose. I felt i was a failure. And then I met the Jedi. I was already a sage, and could use Nature energy like they could. I felt I belonged. Until they tried to enforce their bullshit code on me.

There is no emotion, there is peace.

There is no chaos, there is serenity.

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

There is no death, there is the Force.

That first line reminds me way too much of ROOT for me to ever be comfortable with it, not to mention completely incorrect. If it said "One should always seek to control one's emotions and seek peace", I would be right behind it. But it doesn't. Same with chaos and serenity. The other two I don't really have a problem with.

Thankfully, I met a kindred spirit with Master Kae. She took her job as an instructor seriously. If I had a question, she would answer. If she did not know, she would find out, clearance be damned. None of that "Because I'm your Master and I said so." She taught me kenjutsu, and how to build a lightsaber. (My first and favorite is, of course, orange. Still have it, which is uncommon among Jedi, considering I made it a decade and two wars ago. Normally they are destroyed left and right. But, I follow Shinobi Rule #2, Always Maintain Your Equipment, Especially Orange Laserswords of Awesome. ) I did missions alongside her for five years, until she was excommunicated. Her crime? Having a daughter. Brianna was adorable, even though I had to change a few of her diapers. I don't know what happened to either of them, unfortunately. The Council then assigned me to Master Zhar. Decent enough guy, but no Master Kae, and I took it out on him. No violence or raised voices, but a subtle prank here and there, pushing the limits of what I could get away with, that kind of thing. He expected it, apparently it is not uncommon for apprentices to bond with their masters in such a way, and he bore my insolence stoically. Like I said, Decent guy. Toed the party line though, so it was difficult to engage him in a good old fashioned, no holds barred debate, like I enjoyed with Master Kae and Ero-sennin.

Then the Mandalorian Wars came.


I pleaded with the Masters, to just let me help. But they said no. I had to sit there, and feel each and every person die, so the Masters could keep their hands clean. I quit the Order right then and there. Hundreds, no, thousands of Jedi, similarly compelled to help, joined me.

I remember the speech I gave well.

I, in Republic armor, wearing a Jedi Robe like a long-coat over it, stood up to the podium. hundreds of cameras were on me. but i felt no nervousness.

"People of the Republic. We have lost several worlds to The Mandalorians, but does this signal our defeat? NO! It is a new beginning. The amount of Jedi fighting is merely 1/30th of their forces. So how is it that we are holding them back? IT IS BECAUSE OUR GOAL IS A RIGHTEOUS ONE! It has been over fifty years since Exar Kun, consumed by hatred, first turned the Mandalorians against us. We want our freedom. Never forget the times when the Mandalorians have trampled us! We, the Galactic Republic, have had a long and arduous struggle to achieve freedom for all citizens of our great nation. Our fight is sacred, our cause divine. We must send them a message, but not composed of words. We have wasted too much time with words. We need action now. The Mandalorians must be taught a strong lesson for their evil corruption. This is only the beginning of our war. Many of your fathers and brothers have perished valiantly in the face of a contemptible enemy. We must never forget what the Mandalorians have done to our people! By focusing our anger and sorrow, we are finally in a position where victory is within our grasp, and once again, our most cherished nation will flourish. Victory is the greatest tribute we can pay those who sacrifice their lives for us! Rise, our people, Rise! Take your sorrow, and turn it into anger! The Republic thirsts for the strength of its people! GLORY TO THE REPUBLIC!"

There was a massive bout of applause, although i could have sworn one person started screaming "SEIG ZEON!", whatever that means.

And then we kicked Mandalorian ass.

However, that was only the beginning. Once the Mandalorians were defeated (and I stole their leader's helmet),I quickly discovered that they were a mere expeditionary force, and the real threat had yet to arrive. The Sith. It would be a few decades, more than enough time to prepare. I tried informing the Jedi council, but they blew me off. I was a mere deserter after all. I then tried the Republic, but they were too eager to get back to normalcy, and potential invasions are bad PR.

So I did what I had to. I had to do things the Shinobi way. I learned the Sith ways, in order to learn their tactics. But the Sith Code made too much sense to me, it completed my nindo. But I had a job to do. The forces loyal to me learned Sith tactics, in hopes we could pose as OPFOR (Opposing Forces, a term to mean people who play "the enemy" during training war-games), and essentially give the Republic a flu shot. Inject with a small amount of virus in order to get the body used to fighting it.

However, it is like giving a flu shot to someone with AIDS.

Meaning, we are completely wiping the floor with them, even with me pulling the punches.


Hmm. My Sage senses are tingling. I wake up from my trance, just as a trooper opens the door. How rude, he didn't even knock. It had better be an emergency, like, say, a team of Jedi sent to assassinate me who somehow made it past all of my Dark Jedi and hundreds of troopers specially trained to take down Jedi. Pfft. Like that'll happen.

"Lord Revan, a team of Jedi sent to assassinate you somehow made it past all of the Dark Jedi and hundreds of troopers specially trained to take down Jedi, and are headed towards the bridge!"

Well, Shit.

AN. The Scene with Haku being possesed by Gollum from Lord of the Rings, is actually a satire of how all authors use the "precious people" line like it's going out of style, when in reality, the word is very rarely used.

Don't worry, How Naruto got to Star Wars-verse, and why he isn't looking for his friends, will be explained in time.

Also, My Revan!Naruto will be semi-canonical. Meaning, while he may have bouts of depression and ruthlessness, he is never Emo or sadistic, and is most of the time a Hammy Cloud-Cuckoolander/bunny-ears lawyer wiseass, with occasional Sagaciousness for seasoning.

Basically, a not-quite-as-perverted Jaraiya with a lightsaber.