I don't own D. Gray-man.

Warning: Past Laven, Present Yullen :) (boyxboy), AU.

Surprisingly enough it will be in Lavi's pov only (for now at least)

Watching them, how they seemed to be made for each other, was painful.

Lavi watched as his two best friends fought, leaving the impression that they hated each other, but he knew that when they were alone hate was far from what they felt for each other. No one, other than himself, really understood how dependent they were of each other.

It wasn't just because his observation skills were the best, but because in a way he had been the key that brought them together.

It was during his senior year of high school that Lavi met Allen, who was a freshman.

Entranced by the boys exotic look, he approached him and they quickly became friends. Unlike their meeting, when he introduced the white-haired boy to his best friend Yu Kanda, they hated each other.

Whenever they were close to each other they fought and made Lavi's life a bit more entertaining. While Allen and Kanda fought constantly, he and Allen started to become closer.

They would always be together and eventually Lavi began to develop a crush.

It had shocked him when he realized his feeling towards, he had always been attracted to girls and was even known for his flirting ways, but the boy was different.

He was bright and adorable.

Before he knew it his feelings became stronger the more he and Allen became closer. It was to the point that he could no longer hold his feelings in.

So on the day of the white-haired boys birthday, he confessed and asked the boy out. Allen was shocked, and to Lavi's delight quite embarrassed.

With a bright red face, Allen confessed that he might have feelings for him as well and agreed to going out with him. He had kissed the boy without thinking, causing the boy to become even more blushed.

Apparently it had been his first kiss.

After dropping him off at his place, Lavi's quickly went to his house and decided to tell both Leenalee and Kanda the great news. Lenalee of course had been happy for him and told him not to mess this relationship, an advice he should have carefully listened to.

When he told Kanda, he was surprised that his best friend didn't yell at him for calling so late with news that he was not interested in, all he got from the other line was silence and then a "hmm" of acknowledgment.

Lavi had been to busy with his own happiness, to really think about his best friends odd behavior.

Once he and Allen began dating, Kanda rarely hanged out with them. If he did, it was only when Lenalee was present, still Lavi had not found it odd since Kanda still acted like his normal grumpy self.

It had been Allen who had told him that Kanda was not acting like himself, but even then he just brushed it off telling Allen that, that was Kanda's way of giving them alone time.

After five months of dating Allen, things became to sour.

The reason was because Allen never really told him he loved him. Lavi had told him during their five months anniversary, but Allen didn't. Lavi had excused it since he believed that Allen was just to shy, but more problems became to develop. The second was when Allen told him he just wasn't ready to move their relationship to next level, when Lavi tried to become more intimate.

It was frustrating and soon enough he became to voice his frustration to Allen, which had caused them to fight.

Lavi, angry with Allen, began to avoid him.

It had been a wrong choice, especially since Allen had tried to ask for forgiveness. Still he had been angry and kept ignoring him. After Lenalee told him he was being a big idiot, Lavi started talking to Allen again.

They talked everything out and eventually Allen told him he was sorry for also being an idiot and not telling him that he loved him. Still Allen told him he wasn't ready to have sex yet, Lavi had understood at first since that had been Allen's first relationship and he was inexperienced.

Not wanting to cause more damage to their already fragile relationship, Lavi told him he would wait until he was ready and Allen had been happy.

It was during that time that he made the worst mistake in his life and in the worst time possible.

Since graduation was close, parties were being thrown from practically every corner, one of them was from a close friend and he decided to attend.

He had asked Allen if he wanted to go as well, but he had declined since the next day he had a math test and he wanted to study. Of course he had asked Kanda as well, but it didn't surprise him when called him an idiot and told him to fuck off. The last person he had asked was Lenalee who also declined with the same excuse as Allen.

Even so Lavi had decided to go ahead and attend especially since Allen told him that it was okay, they would have not been able to see each other anyway.

At the party Levi had decided to relax and have as much fun as possible, considering that once he graduated he was gonna work with his grandpa as an informant. The job took a lot of dedication and time.

Grabbing some beer, Lavi decided it was the best way to let loose, he drank a quite a few to the point he could not think.

Or remember.

The next day he had awoke with the worst headache he had ever had and it got worse when his phone began to ring loudly, causing his head to ache in protest. It was when he opened his eyes that he notice he was not alone. His body froze as he felt the girl half on his chest began to stir and mortification began to settle in to his mind.

They were both naked and the air still smelled of the activity he was now for sure they had done.

All he could think of was Allen and how much he hated himself. His self-hatred was put on hold, when once again his phone rang. Moving the girl away from him, Lavi could only feel disgust as he sat up and got his phone.

It was Lenalee.

He had let it ring until it stopped, not wanting to talk to anyone, but when he noticed he had fifty missed calls from different people. He called Lenalee back.

"Where are you!" she had said sounding odd.

"Um... I... What's wrong?" it was all he could say, to afraid and disgusted with himself to tell her his mistake.

"You have to come to the hospital close to Allen's house quick!"

"What happened? Is Allen ok?" he answered quickly forgetting about his infidelity.

At first all he had heard was a sob before Lenalee answered.

"Mana's dead."

So this is a request fill for a good friend of mine who wanted me to write something angsty between Lavi and Allen. Not knowing what to write at first I was inspired by Bruno Mars (like always XD) song When I Was Your Man. Of course this is hard for me since I love yullen and I dont really like Laven (luckily she wanted yullen more than laven), also because I love Lavi and it hurt to write him as a cheater. Anyway this story won't be that long, but because I'm focusing on both Soul Mates & There is no if this one probably won't be updated regularly.