Disclaimer: I own nothing
Rated: M (Naughtiness!)
Kagome rolled onto her back, lightly groaning in pain as the cramps just seemed to rip through her aching body and mentally cursed her femaleness.
"You've been lying in here all day," The drawl of a voice had her turning her head and she glanced into eyes that were as blue as her own, "Might I assume it's your menstrual cycle?"
"Good work there, Mr. Detective," Kagome gave a pained, sarcastic smile at her flatmate, "What made it so obvious?" She sighed, curling up as another wave of pain hit her lower abdomen.
"Curious," Sherlock raised a brow, observing her rather intently, "In the past three months you've been living with John and I, this is the first time you've experienced it."
"I don't get it regularly anymore," Kagome admitted, wondering if this was considered 'normal' conversation for Sherlock, "Since my teenage years. I guess that's why it's pretty bad when I do get it." She rolled face down, trying to find a more comfortable position in which the cramps would hurt less.
"From the pattern I deduced from this recent serial killer, there will be another murder in approximately forty minutes. Lestrade will call in fifty," Sherlock said and Kagome threw him a grumpy look, "John will not be home from the clinic in time. I'm in need of an assistant."
"I wouldn't be of any help," Kagome ran a hand through her hair, "I'm sure you can do just fine on your own this time around." She threw a pillow in between her legs and buried her face in the blankets.
"Medication does not help, I noticed," He glanced at the bottle that sat on the little night table, "But have you tried other remedies?"
"Heating pads don't work and chocolate is a myth," Kagome deadpanned, opening one dulled eye and staring at him, "Is this really appropriate?"
"The menstrual cycle happens to every woman, there is nothing to be embarrassed about." Sherlock simply answered and Kagome felt like laughing because it was honestly starting to sound like this was another one of his experiments.
"Amaterasu-sama," Kagome muttered, knowing that expression, "What are you thinking?" She was a bit scared to find out.
"Menstrual cramps are known to be relieved by uterine contractions caused by oxytocin, which are released following an orgasm." He said as if that was a perfectly normal conversation between two people.
Kagome fell off the bed.
"Are you serious?!" Her voice raised quite noticeably as she climbed back onto the bed, staring at the Consulting Detective with incredulous eyes, "What are you even implying!?"
"A large number of women your age possess a sexual gratification device commonly called a vibrator." Sherlock drawled, observing her quickly reddening cheeks with a vague interest.
"I grew up on a shrine, Sherlock," Kagome said with a fluster, "I try to keep myself as pure as I can in this day and age."
"Seeing as you're unwilling to bring yourself to orgasm, then I shall be of assistance." Sherlock was closer now, far too close to the bed and herself for comfort.
"J-just go to the crime scene yourself!" Kagome covered herself with the blankets out of raw embarrassment, "Just leave me be and–!" She groaned when a harsh pain seemed to pummel her right in the stomach.
"You're being quite difficult," Sherlock seemed somewhat irritated, "This would relieve you of your pain, I will have an assistant, and Lestrade will have his criminal in short time."
"Fine!" Kagome simply gave in, the pain overpowering any embarrassment and Sherlock was kneeling in front of her, "It will be messy." He gave her a look that he clearly knew that.
"Take off your trousers." Sherlock's voice was still so impassive and Kagome hesitantly grasped the elastic of her sweatpants. And she couldn't help but to blurt something out.
"Is it strange you're actually the second person who has offered to do this for me?" Kagome felt like slapping herself when Sherlock gave her that raised brow that silently told her to answer.
"It was Big Brother, strangely enough."
When John got home from his job, he could only wonder why Kagome seemed to be avoiding Sherlock as best as she possibly could, "What did you do?" He asked with a frown and Sherlock seemed unimpressed by his tone.
"There are many ways to relieve menstrual cramps. I merely showed Kagome one of them."
...What the hell did that mean...?