"Darien, please forgive me! I don't know what I did wrong, I'll do anything. Please take me back!" I watch Serena fall to her knees in front of me, tears spilling from her eyes as she begs me for something I can never give her.
"Serena, there is nothing you can do," I say as firmly as I can. My heart is breaking as I say these words to her. I don't mean them, but I have to protect her. My true love is safer without me in her life. "You are a total klutz. You can't get anything higher than a 40% in school, and you are always getting in my way. You can't fix these things, it's who you are. I don't want to be around you. I deserve someone more mature than you."
She winces when I speak these hurtful words. I watch as her spirits darken, and a strange look takes over her face. Serena sniffles and wipes her tears away. Finally, she stands up and says, "I can change. Let me work on myself. I can do better in school, I can watch where I am going, and I'll take classes to be more proper."
"No, Serena!" I shout, frustrated, "You just don't get it! I don't love you anymore! I never want to see your face again. Leave me alone!"
"Is that really what you want?" Serena asks, trying to hold back a waterfall of tears. Oh god. No, it's not what I want, but if we get back together, then she will die after our wedding. I couldn't bear that!
"Yes. It is. Now leave me alone!" Before I can watch her fall to pieces because of me again, I turn to walk away from her and head to my apartment.
As I walk away I hear her quietly whisper, "Fine. I give up, I can't take this pain anymore."
This isn't her usual response. Usually, Serena would cry my name as I ignored her the best that I could. She is giving up on our relationship? Finally, after months of me telling her I don't love her? My heart sinks. I knew this was going to happen eventually, and I'm thankful she finally got the picture, but I'm still sad at the same time. I brush a tear from my eye, and continue on my way home.
Her school uniform suits her. The outfit brings out the childish side of her while she smiles and shows off the victory sign. As I look down at her picture in my wallet, I can't help but smile a little bit. Serena always had a way of making me grin even when she wasn't around. I remember taking this picture of her, telling Serena she would always be my love.
My heart is breaking. The only girl I will ever love can't be with me without her assured demise.
Every night for the last two months I've had the reoccurring dream of Serena and I getting married. She is beautifully dressed in all white, and is breathtaking as she grasps my hand into hers. I would clutch her hand tightly, never wanting to let go. We'd walk down the aisle, champagne bottles popping open around us.
"Oh Darien, finally we can live happily ever after! I am so happy," She would say gazing into my eyes lovingly. I would reach down and kiss her lips. Then the entire ground beneath her would fall apart, causing Serena to fall to her cruel death.
Then the voice would boom over me as I cried for my new wife, "Darien you must stay away from Serena, if you two stay together then she will be doomed!"
At first I didn't believe it. It was just a horrible nightmare. That was all. A sick, horrible, twisted dream. Nothing worth throwing my relationship away over. Or so I thought.
I sigh, putting the picture of Serena back in my wallet. I walk over to my dresser and pick up a photo of the two of us sitting in the park. We look so happy, but there is the reminder we can't be together, right on the frame. The night before saving Serena with my kiss, this frame had shattered as the voice warned me outside of my dream that if I were with her, she would die.
Serena would never understand if I explained to her the real reason I didn't want to be together anymore. Serena wouldn't care. She would sacrifice everything to be with me, including her own life. That is why I have to lie. This is why I can't tell the scouts about my dreams. To protect her. I can't be selfish and keep her at the cost of her life.
I hear knocking at my door, followed by Rini's voice saying in a jingly voice, "Darien, let me in! I want to stay the night here."
Rini. I chuckle to myself. This pink haired little girl was the only person keeping me sane through this breakup. I open the door and let the little kid inside. She jumps up and hugs me around my waist. "Of course you can stay the night, Rini. Do you want some cookies?"
"Yeah!" Rini smiles. "I love cookies!"
"You are so much like Serena." It's true. Rini wears nearly the same hairstyle as my ex-girlfriend. The only difference is Serena's hair is shaped like little balls, and Rini's are shaped like cones. She eats a ton of food just as quickly as Serena. She even acts the same way a lot of the time. Both girls disagree with the scouts and myself though.
"Don't compare me to meatball head, she is so annoying!" Rini protests.
I watch Rini run into the kitchen and grab a juice box from the little side door of the fridge. When Rini started staying at my place more, I bought a whole bunch of snacks and stuff just for her. My apartment was being taken over by her a little bit. I had made so many changes. Kid books for her to read with me sit on the bottom shelf of my bookshelf. Dolls and kids movies on the second lowest shelf, a dresser drawer in my room dedicated to her extra clothes. I really have accommodated this child.
A part of me feels like her father figure now that her mom and dad are in trouble in the future. She's been alone for so long. Sometimes, I feel like in some sick way that Serena and I are splitting custody of Rini. That Rini is a daddy's girl, even though I know she loves her mom in the future best. However, we are not Rini's parents. We are just helping her until she can go back. Sometimes, when I spend time with her, it's hard to remember that.
I pick up a box of cookies from my cupboard, and hand them to my favorite little girl. A night with Rini is just what I need to distract myself from Serena. I turn to the clock, it's 10:00 pm. Why did she come here so late tonight?
"Hey Rini, did you and Serena get in another fight?" I ask, concerned. They were always fighting like cats and dogs. I'm sure that deep down they really care for each other, although they never show it.
"No. Sammy and their parents went to go visit some family out-of-town. Serena said she had to stay and study for an important test on Monday. Which I don't know why she bothers! She can never get anything higher than a 30!" Rini says matter of factly. She laughs at her little joke, popping Aladdin into the vcr. It stings to hear Rini say something similar to what I had to Serena. If she had given up on us, why was she trying to improve her grades by studying?
I realize Rini hadn't explained why she didn't go with Serena's family. "Rini, why didn't you go with them?"
"Do you not want me here?" Rini asks as little tears cloud up her eyes. She is pouting at me with her little lips shaking. That kid. She reminds me of Serena so much.
"No, that's not it, I'm just confused about how you got left behind."
Rini sighs and finally answers me, "I was worried about Serena. She's spent the whole day crying and Luna is visiting Artemis. I was gonna stay, but she shut herself in her room and locked the door. When I asked if she was okay, she told me she would be better if I went away."
"So you came here." I finish for her. I feel a stabbing and twisting in my heart. I hate knowing that I cause Serena so much pain. It has to be this way though. Serena has to move on, as much as we both hate it.
"You are the only one who is nice to me, Darien." Rini says, whimpering. "Nobody else likes me, especially that mean Serena! I miss my mommy."
I pick Rini up into my arms to console her. I rub her back and hold her tight. I hate seeing such a sweet little girl so sad all the time. All I want is to fix the problems in the future, but I can't yet. In the meantime, I have to protect her. "That's not true, Rini. Serena and the girls love you."
"Do you love me, Darien?" Rini asks me with her childish voice. She looks up at me with her red wide eyes, and I feel the pain in my heart just melt away. Of course I love this little girl.
"I love you like the daughter I never had, Rini."
Rini buries her head into my shoulder and hugs me tightly. "I love you too, Darien. You remind me so much of daddy!"
After a couple of hours of watching Aladdin, reading stories, and pigging out on cookies and chocolates, Rini was exhausted. I smile as I look at my little girl, or rather someone else's little girl sleeping on the couch. A little droplet of drool drips down her mouth onto the sofa cushion as she makes little snores.
"Oh Rini, what am I going to do with you?" I whisper to myself as I lift her into my arms and carry her to my bed. I tuck her in tightly with my blankets and kiss her forehead. Before walking out the door, I pick up the picture of me and Serena, and I kiss her too. "Good night, Serena. I miss you."
Sure, it's a little pathetic, I think to myself, grabbing my spare blanket and pillow from the linen closet. It really is. Every day I think of Serena, and every night I have dreams about her. She is my one and only soul mate and I have ripped myself away from her. Regardless of all that though, I am still madly in love with the woman. Someday she will find someone else to be happy with. I'll make myself be happy for her, because I will never be able to love someone else. It's best this way though. It really is.
I lay on my couch and plop the spare pillow underneath my head. I tuck myself in with my blanket and roll over, clutching the picture of Serena and I together. I fight every urge to cry. I will be strong, for both of us, since she can't seem to be.
I roll over, and check the clock on the end table. 2:46 am. I shove my pillow on top of my head and try to go back to sleep. For the first time in a long time, I was having a peaceful sleep, and I really wanted to enjoy it.
"DARIEN!" Rini yells from my bedroom. Guess she had a nightmare or something. So either way I guess I won't be getting much sleep tonight. Just like usual. Rini then screams, "DARIEN, HELP ME!"
The Black Moon must have found her here! I jump out of my couch and race to my bedroom. I open the door, and look at my bed. There, Rini sat fading in and out of existence. I go to grab her, and she is still solid.
"Rini! What's happening? How do I help you?" I choke back a sob. The only person I love at all besides Serena is hurt somehow, and I don't know how to help her!
"They got my mommy," Rini whispers. "Darien, I feel so weak."
"Rini, I'll save you. We'll help your mommy. What can I do to help? Please tell me what to do!"
I'm crying now. Rini is becoming more and more transparent.
"Darien, tell Serena I love her too."
She was gone. First, her body had gone limp, and then she disappeared right in front of me, right in my arms. "No!" I yell, crying uncontrollably. "Rini! Come back to me! Please!"
I wait, hoping that she will, but Rini never returns. After an hour of crying and blowing my nose, I finally give up and pick up the phone. I dial Serena's number, because she has to know. Poor Rini. Thinking about it just makes the tears fall again.
The phone rings and I get the answering machine. "Serena! Pick up your phone! Get up!"
She doesn't pick up, so I try again. Once again I get the machine. "Cmon Serena, I know you are mad at me, but this is important!"
I am extremely angry. I dial her number one final time. The machine! Again! "God damn it, Serena! Pick up your fucking phone or I am going over there!"
I throw my phone, cord and all across the room. The phone cord rips out of the wall, and my entire phone smashes. I don't care. I scream at nothing in frustration.
I transform into Tuxedo Mask and open the sliding door to my balcony. Then I start jumping from roof to roof towards Serena's house. No matter what I'm doing I can't stop feeling the unbelievable pain of losing Rini. Now I have to tell Serena. I have to tell Serena we failed our mission to save the small child and help her family. I have to explain that I have no idea what happened. The worst part is that now I am alone. I can't be with Serena, and now Rini has disappeared into thin air.
I climb down Serena's roof in front of Serena's bedroom window, and slide the window open. The sight before me is startling. Was she robbed?
Her clothes are all over the floor. Her closet has boxes fallen on top of each other and spilling into the bedroom. Her vanity mirror is smashed, and all the pictures of her and I are either broken in the frame or ripped apart, covering her bed. Shards of glass cover the carpeted floor. Then I notice the drops of blood and the barely cracked door showing a little bit of light from the hallway.
"Serena?" I call out. My heart is beating extremely fast. I feel like it's about to fall out. Never before in my life was I more scared for her then in this moment. Even during the battles with Queen Beryl and the Doom Tree, never did I feel this kind of fear.
No response. I tiptoe past her bed and the shattered glass on the floor, following the trail of small blood stains. I open the door, and find myself being lead to a bathroom. I hear the swishing of bath water, and knock on the door. "Serena," I say in a small voice.
Still no response, just the swishing of water.
"Serena, are you okay?" My heart is racing. My head is screaming at me. When she still doesn't answer me, I try to open the door, but it is locked. "Serena! Unlock the door! Please! Please?"
I start slamming my body into the door, but I can't break it down. I run down the stairs, and open the garage door, trying to find an axe. After fumbling around for a few minutes, I find the light and turn it on. My eyes search the room, and then find the axe leaning against a toolbox and wall.
I hurry back up the stairs with my tool and start cutting into the door. I slam the axe into the door until it finally separates from the handle. I drop the weapon and push my way in.
The first thing I notice is the smell. It takes everything in me not to throw up. Then I see her. Serena is naked in the tub, completely underwater. The water is red and bloody. I feel sick to my stomach. I reach into the blood tainted water, and pull her up. Her body is limp, just like Rini's was before she...
"Serena!" I cry. I shake her body, knowing it's useless. Her head just wobbles like a doll's head. "Oh Serena, why?"
This wasn't supposed to happen. This is the exact opposite of what was supposed to happen!
I hadn't noticed before, all I had focused on was the fact that my ex-girlfriend's corpse was submerged in water. Serena's face is all cut up. Her cheeks, her nose, forehead, and lips. Her neck is slit deeply, the deathly blow. She did this.
"Serena, why did you do this?" I whimper though sobs. I have never felt so weak in my life. I pull her body onto a towel from the door and wrap her in it. I sit on the toilet so I can cradle her in my arms and mourn, but there are hard objects beneath me.
I stand up, holding Serena the entire time in one arm, while picking up her brooch, scepter, and communicator watch in the other. Then I see the note:
"Now he never has to see my face again."
"No." I whisper to myself. "No. No. No. NO. NO!"
The items drop out of my hand and I pull myself to the floor. I hold her in my arms, cradling her while the rain falls from my face.
"I was protecting you, Serena." I sob. "I didn't mean it."
Explaining myself to my dead girlfriend is pointless, I realize. How long had she been dead? How long was it since she decided to kill herself because of me? That's when it clicked. Rini must have died. She was never born. She said that 'They had gotten her mommy.'
Serena was Rini's future mother, and that must have meant that I...I really lost my child tonight. I remember Rini's last request of me.
"Serena, Rini loves you," I say in an inaudible voice. "I love you."
I reach for the communicator because now I have to tell the girls. I dial the number to contact them all at once. Their pictures show up, and ask, "Serena, what's wrong? Is there an attack?"
They are surprised to see my teary eyed face. They are surprised to see me clutching Serena's naked body in my arms. They can see the cuts on her face. "Darien! What the hell is going on?"
"She's dead." I say in an emotionless voice, "She killed herself."
"What happened?" Lita yells at me.
Amy bursts into tears. Raye, freezes up and turns her head, holding back her true emotions.
Mina stutters, "D-did she leave a note?"
Luna and Artemis ask together in an angry tone, "Why?"
Our locket bursts open from the sink, and starts playing it's sad tune. Finally I answer, "Because of me."
This is definitely not one of my happier fics. I had this fanfic on the brain for a while. This fic is inspired by the song "Why" by Rascal Flatts. Thank you for reading, and please let me know what you thought? Lots of hugs! - Natasha