Self Loathing By BithaBlu

[Insert usual disclaimer here] For any of you that care this is my first InuYasha fic. Once again- thanks to Snow Tigra for introducing me to yet another fantastic anima. Ini-dude bay-be!

Self Loathing Chapter One: False Mirror


InuYasha's face slammed into the ground once again. Kagome glared at him crumpled on the rocky soil that they had just been arguing upon. Still seething, she whirled around and stormed off to the Bone Eater's Well. 'Stupid InuYasha' Kagome thought 'How dare he say that to me?!?' She crossed her arms and walked faster, thinking about what InuYasha had said to piss her off this time. 'My life on the other side isn't a useless waste of time! I have to prepare for the rest of my life! When we get the Shikon no Tama and beat Naraku then I'll go home and I won't have to come back here all the time...' Kagome stopped and let her arms slip back down to her sides as that thought sank in. 'I won't be able to come back, will I? I'd have to have the Shikon no Tama and there's no way anyone will trust me with it after the first time I had it...'

Her arms slid back up as she hugged herself and tried to ignore the flood of thoughts that crashed into her head as she continued to trudge along towards the well. 'I won't be able to see what kind of youki Shippo grows up to be. I won't be here to watch Sango and Miroku finally realize that they care about each other as more than just friends. Though I bet it'll take Sango longer.' Kagome chuckled as she thought of Sango coming to terms with her feeling for Miroku. 'And InuYasha... I won't see him again either...' Kagome's feet hesitated. Her body was turning it's self around to walk back to the village before her brain reminded her of why she had stormed off in the first place. Kagome's lips pursed into a scowl again and she was just about to march straight to the well and jump back to her time when a voice slithered down from a tree she was standing near.

"Poor child, were you thinking of going back to him? Don't you realize he'll never love you, no matter how many times you going scurrying back to him?" Kagome looked up to see Kikyo propped up smugly in the branches of a tree. Her soul-stealing creatures weaved around her as she stood up and then lifted her down to the ground. Kikyo sauntered up to the shocked Kagome and smirked. "His heart belongs to me."

Kagome's shock was quickly replaced with a violent anger. "Well, I guess his is the only heart you have then," she retorted. Kagome shrugged casually as she tried to suppress the fear she has as she stood face to face with the dead miko that had tried to kill her. "I mean, you are a soulless, heartless corpse aren't you? Even the skin you wear is reformed soil that was given to you. By a monoke no less. At least you had the decency to kill it though. Although I would think that a respectable miko would have gone off and died again instead of stealing the souls of the dead people she was supposed to protect." Kagome grinned at the furious expression on Kikyo's face. "I mean, really, you use youki to take the souls so you can continue to liv- wait... exist. Didn't you used to battle with creatures that did that when you were alive?"

Fury consumed Kikyo's face as Kagome prattled on. This impudent brat was supposed to be a reincarnation of her? Impossible. It was inconceivable that any part of her could not understand the need for the completion that InuYasha's death would bring. Something clicked in Kikyo's mind and she realized why the insipid girl was insulting her. The twisted smirk curled Kikyo's lips once again as she spoke, "Stupid child. Do you not think that I understand why you want me to return to my death?" Kikyo reveled at the sight of Kagome's face contorting in a mix of confusion and hostility. "You think that with me gone, InuYasha will have no choice but to accept you as his love. After all, as inferior as you are, you are a counterfeit of me. How could he not look at our face and remember the love that he and I have? But you forget one thing baka..." Kikyo's face distorted in rage as she hissed out "You will never be me!"

Lighting fast, a hand reached out and slapped Kikyo across the face. Kagome didn't even realize that it had been her hand as she screamed "You bitch! I wouldn't ever want to be like you!" As Kikyo lunged for her, Kagome balled up her fist and swung as hard as she could towards the mirror image of her own face.

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Danke to Rumiko Takahashi for creating these characters for fanfic authors to abuse. ;)